CHAPTER 1:

Note: I'm stupid. I haven't read/watched very much of the series (in fact, only what Cartoon Network has shown. T.T ) my facts are wrong, my time is wrong, so this story is magical and takes place in a plot hole.

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"Are you sure you can take me?" asked Ino as she and Hinata prepared to spar.

"I don't know; can you handle me?" the two girls smiled at each other teasingly.

"Hurry it up! We don't have all day!" griped Naruto from the sidelines; Sakura smacked him over the head.

"Like you're one to talk!" she barked, lowering her hand. "You take forever, just staring your opponent down and taking big, before you ever even throw one punch!"

"Seriously," added Kiba, "in the prelims, I thought you'd never shut up!"

"Ah, put a cork in it!" huffed Naruto hotly.

"Wish me luck, Sasuke!" cheered Ino, waving at the boy; he turned away, totally uninterested.

"Oh yeah, it's always him she wants to wish her luck…" grumbled Shikamaru, crossing his arms.

"You're wasting your time, Ino," said Chouji as he finished off his last bag of chips, "so could you please hurry it up? I'm hungry!"

"I thought you just had lunch an hour ago?" said Shino quietly.

"Yeah!" whined Chouji, "That was one excruciating hour ago! I'm wasting away to nothing!" Shino groaned, giving up and looking away from the other boy.

What a waste of time… thought Gaara disdainfully as he walked the streets of Konohagakure aimlessly. Why are we still here? Why haven't we gone back to Suna yet? Gaara stopped when he spotted the crowd of shinobi. Thinking it was better than just walking around, he went over to them, curious in just the slightest bit as to what they were doing. He stood watching from the outside as two girls, one with blonde hair and the other with dark hair, began to fight. Gaara faintly wondered if they were mad at each other or if they were just training. Then he remembered that he didn't care and went to walk away but stopped when a boy spoke.

"Hinata, do it just as we practiced," he said. It was one of the only people in Konoha Gaara even considered worthy enough to fight; he had proved himself with his use of the Byakugan in the chunin exams.

"Yes, Neji-nissan!" called the dark haired girl back to him. She charged for the blonde, making hands signs as she ran.

"Not so fast, Hinata!" said Ino, making hands signs of her own, "I know you're little eye-trick, and you're not going to get the chance to use it!"

"Byakugan!" cried Hinata, throwing a hand at one of Ino's charka points.

"Mind transfer jutsu!"

There was a bright flash as smoke filled the air. The two girls immediately stopped, not sure what had just happened. After a moment, Hinata raised her hand and asked, "I-is everyone alright?" she squeaked and slapped her hands over her mouth. That wasn't her voice! It sounded like, "Neji-niisan…?" She clamped her mouth again. Was he talking when she was? Pure coincidence? "Ne—" SLAP! "…Ji—" She slowly lowered her hands. "Niisan…?" That was her alright.

"Hinata? Are you alright?" called Naruto.

The girl blushed—he's worried!!♥ "Yes, I'm fine!" she answered.

"Neji?" called the boy back, "Why did you…?" he stopped. "Do… Do I sound like Naruto?!" he shrieked.

Hinata sighed; "Who said that…?" she asked tiredly.

"Me: Ino."

Hinata groaned. "Do I sound like Neji?"

"HEY! At least you don't sound like a 13 year old pipsqueak!!"

"Ino, you're 13, too."

"Oh. Right." The smoke finally cleared away and 'Naruto' and 'Neji' were staring at each other, several feet away from where the girls remembered being. "Tell me I'm dreaming…" moaned 'Naruto', falling backwards onto the ground.

"If only…" groaned Ino's normal voice.

The girl quickly sat back up and turned to see her body standing up and crossing its arms. "Hey! Who's in there?" she demanded.

The body groaned, "Sasuke…"

Ino (as Naruto) squealed giddily and started dancing around. "Sasuke's in my body! Sasuke's in MY body! Sasuke's in MY body!!"

"Hearing that from NARUTO is just plain creepy," came Sasuke's voice. The girl stopped dancing to look over at him. "So? Who're YOU?"

'Sasuke' smirked and crossed 'his' arms; "Why, Sakura of course!"

Ino gaped at her. "YOU get to be in SASUKE?! NO FAIR!!!" she wailed.

"Stop bickering you two!" ordered Hinata's voice. Everyone looked over at the girl's body to see her with a strange look of authority about her. "Now if everyone could just calm down and shut up, maybe we could get all this sorted out." she barked. They all stared at her.

"And why should we listen to you?" asked Sakura's body dully.

Hinata scowled. "Because I can and will use force if necessary."

"B-but," stuttered Hinata (as Neji), "I'm sorry to point this out, but you're in my body and I'm not very strong."

"Yeah, thanks for telling everyone…" grumbled the person, hanging her head.

"By the way; who are you?"

The person turned away in disgrace. "When I said I wanted to be part of the main family, I didn't mean like this…"

"Omigosh! Neji-niisan?!" he nodded; Hinata practically fainted. "Well… at least we didn't get too jumbled up…"

"Speak for yourself," squeaked Gaara nervously; they all turned to him. "Wh-what am I gonna do like this?"

Sakura's body glared at him and asked, "Who's stuck in there?"

Gaara blushed awkwardly. "I… I couldn't even make it past the preliminaries and now I'm in one of the top two…? Oh man…"

"WHO?" growled the girl once more.

"Akimichi Chouji…?"

Ino (as Naruto) burst out laughing. "CHOUJI?" she shrieked, "that's hilarious! Oh boy, did you ever get the short straw on this one!" Sakura shot her an icy glare, silencing the other girl. "Oh, um… sorry…" she whispered. "Oh, so does that mean you're really Gaara then?" she asked; Sakura's body glowered and looked down; he nodded. "Poor thing; even my body would've been better."

Sakura (as Sasuke) glared at her. "I do take offense you know."

"I only speak the truth." pleaded Ino innocently.

"So how're we gonna get back to normal?" asked Shikamaru. "Naruto," he said, raising a hand, before anyone could ask.

"Ino, Hinata," started Neji, addressing the girls, "go back to where you were before and just use your jutsu again." The girls did so and as they got into position they nodded at each other hopefully. They made their hand signs and… nothing happened. They glanced at each other nervously and tired again; still nothing.

"Um… Neji-niisan…?" started Hinata frightfully, "I don't think it's working."

"Yeah, I mean it took me years to master my mind transfer jutsu, and Naruto's body just isn't equipped for it."

"Don't tell me…" groaned Naruto.

"They're gonna have to learn it themselves." finished Neji tiredly.

"I'm sorry!" squeaked Hinata, bowing to… herself. "It's all my fault—it's because of my unstable charka and—and—"

"Are we gonna be stuck like this for years?" cried Sakura (as Sasuke), totally freaking out.

"It depends on how fast Neji and Sasuke can learn the techniques." said Ino, trying to calm her down.

"It shouldn't be that hard; Hinata and I use pretty much the same technique." sighed Neji.

"And I'm a pretty quick learner." added Sasuke.

"But… what're we going to tell our families?" asked Sakura quietly. They all looked down, not wanting to get into it.

"We won't," said Neji at last; everyone stared at her. "We have to keep this under wraps; if anyone else were to find out what's happened it would cause a panic in the village."

"Yeah… and we all know each other pretty well—it shouldn't be too hard!" added Naruto, starting to cheer up a little.

"What about me?" cried Chouji pathetically, "I don't know the first thing about this guy!"

"Well… he can explain it to you, right Gaara?" Naruto turned to find the other boy gone. "Gaara? Uh oh…"

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"So I'm stuck in a girl's body…? Joy." Mumbled Gaara as he… she walked down the street, desperate to get away from the others. "I don't even know this girl… How do girls even act?" she stared up at the sky as she walked. "I suppose… they're bubbly, and happy, oh THAT will be fun… and they're really flirty too I guess…" she sighed, "Can this day get any worse?"

SMACK!

Gaara fell back onto the ground painfully; she had bumped into someone while not looking. She growled quietly, glaring at her feet; it was just too strange to look up at the person in this condition. All she could say, to be in character anyway, was, "Sorry; I wasn't looking where I was going…" she flinched; it was so awkward to be polite.

"No, I was the one not paying attention," apologized the person she had walked into; even more politely than Gaara which made her even more nauseous. "Huh? Oh, Sakura-chan!" chirped the person. Gaara finally brought herself to look up; it was a boy and not a very pretty one at that. He had overgrown eyebrows and the dumbest bowl cut hair, and he wore a green outfit that made Gaara sick to look at. The boy looked so familiar, but she couldn't place where she had seen him before. "I'm terribly sorry for knocking you down," he continued, reaching out a hand to Gaara, "I was in a hurry to meet Gai-sensei." He laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head with his other hand. Gaara thought she saw him blushing; was he this girl's boyfriend or something? She took the hand and the boy pulled her up, quite easily actually; he was pretty strong. "It's getting kind of late, Sakura-chan. Shouldn't you be heading home soon?"

Gaara froze. Uh oh. Where does this girl live? "Um…" she glanced up at the boy. Well, if this guy IS her boyfriend, then there's no harm in making as excuse… "Probably," she chirped cutely, trying her best to act like she thought a girl should, "but I thought I could just spend a little time with you!" This time Gaara was sure he was blushing; the boy's face had turned scarlet red.

"R-really?" he stuttered, smiling broadly at what he thought was Sakura. "That would be wonderful! I-I mean, if y-you wouldn't mind coming to training with me?"

"Not at all!" said Gaara, doing something she probably hadn't done since she was a small child; smiling.

"W-well, th-then l-let's g-get g-go-going…!" he stuttered, more flustered than ever. He started to march off and Gaara quietly followed him, hands folded neatly in front, walking as straight as she could; still trying to act like a girl. As she walked with the blushing boy, Gaara racked her brain, trying to remember what his name was; the best she could come up with was 'Stone-something'.

Finally they arrived at the door of an apartment; a note was tacked onto it. "Called away on mission, be back soon, —Gai." The boy groaned. "Gai-sensei… you promised we'd resume training again today…" he hung his head in depression.

Gaara tilted her head at him. "Resume?" she asked curiously.

The boy stood up straight again and smiled at Gaara. "Yes; I just got out of the hospital today and Gai-sensei told me that we could start right away."

"Hospital? Why were you in the hospital?"

The boy frowned. "I guess in all the excitement of the exams you forgot about me…" he sighed. "I was there because of that sand ninja; we fought in the preliminaries."

"Gaara," blurted the girl, "his name is Gaara." Now it was coming back to her. She finally remembered his name, Lee, and how she had crushed him in that battle. Should've killed him when I had the chance… thought Gaara dully.

"It is okay, though," Lee said, taking Gaara away from her bloodthirsty thoughts, "I'm better now…" he trailed off and looked away from 'Sakura', a terribly sad look in his eyes. Gaara thought that a girl would probably say something, especially if she was this guy's girlfriend, but she honestly didn't know what to say. Eventually she just asked, "So you're not training today, then?" Lee nodded; Gaara sighed, coming up with her most brilliant plan ever. "Would you like to walk me home?" Because if this guy didn't know where Sakura lived, then Gaara was pretty much screwed.

Lee brightened up and smiled at her. "I'd love to!" he chirped. Gaara inwardly sighed with relief and followed the boy out of the apartment complex. "Thank you for coming with me, Sakura-chan. I'm sorry it was for nothing." said Lee politely as they stepped out onto the sidewalk.

Gaara grunted a little and then remembered he was still a girl. "Oh, don't worry about it," she chirped cutely, still being as disgustingly bubbly as possible. She looked up at Lee to see that he still looked sad, so Gaara, deciding on a whim, took his hand into her own and walked a little closer to the boy, and all not too gracefully I might add.

Lee's heart skipped a beat. Sakura-chan? Holding MY hand?? And walking like we're dating??? He squealed quietly. Even if Gai-sensei and I were not able to train, this has indeed been a VERY good day…!

Gaara looked away from Lee. When this is all said and done, I'm SO killing this guy… she thought disdainfully, shifting her hand awkwardly in Lee's.

Once Lee had walked Gaara all the way up to Sakura's front door, Gaara hopefully stuck her hand into her pocket and thankfully pulled out a key. At least she's organized… As she opened the door to the apartment, Lee started to say something, but stopped and looked away, blushing. Gaara sighed quietly, but looked back at the boy nevertheless, still smiling cutely.

"Um, Sa-Sa-Sakura-chan…?" he stuttered, blushing furiously, "you… um… I…" he swallowed hard, "Goodnight, Sakura-chan!" he blurted at last, bowing for the girl.

Gaara stared at him stupidly. It took him that long just to say goodnight!? She groaned quietly, thinking how annoying Lee was. But then she thought of something, something rather unpleasant. But if this girl really is his girlfriend, then I don't really have a choice…Gaara sighed again, and as Lee was straightening back up, she leaned over to him and kissed his cheek. Lee immediately straightened, cheeks flushing crimson.

"Goodnight, Lee-kun! ♥" chirped Gaara cutely, trying to act coy as she slid into the apartment. Once she closed the door she scowled. DEFINITELY going to kill him…

Lee stared at the closed door, lightly holding a hand to the cheek Sakura had kissed; he grinned stupidly. "SHE LIKES ME!!!" he hollered as he skipped down the street, clicking his heels.

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"This isn't so bad…" murmured Hinata (as Neji) at the main house. "At least we won't be far from each other." He looked over at, err… herself, to see Neji grasping her stomach, a pained expression on her face. "What's wrong?"

"You tell me…" she moaned. "I feel like I'm going to die!"

Hinata tensed. "Wh-what do you mean…?" he asked nervously.

"I mean like I'm gonna DIE!" she screamed. "My stomach is cramping up real bad and I have this… this… wet feeling between my legs!!"

Hinata squeaked and slowly turned away. "U-umm… N-Neji-niisan…?" he started cautiously. "I-I don't know quite how to put this, but… y-you're… you're on my… period."

Neji's eyes bugged out and she just stared for a moment, not moving. Then, she slowly moved one shaking hand to her mouth and ran for the bathroom.

"P-poor Niisan…" Hinata sighed, blushing deeply at what he was going through.

"Neji?" asked a voice from behind her; Hinata spun around quickly to see her father staring at him. "Neji it's getting late, shouldn't you be going home now?"

"B-but Father—" he stopped, remembering that she was in Neji's body, "Oh… o-of course, Uncle! I'll be going now…" he turned and reluctantly left for Neji's house, worried about what the boy would do once he got out of the bathroom.

"That didn't help… I think I just made it worse…" she groaned quietly, coming out a few minutes later.

"Hinata, what're you still doing up? Go to bed!" called his Uncle from the other room, hearing his daughter.

"Y-yes, Uncle! I mean, Father!" she called back, heading to Hinata's room. She carefully shut the door and leaned back against it. She looked around and blushed a little; it was the first time she'd ever been in a girl's room. Too tired from the pain in her lower abdomen, Neji flopped down onto the bed, not caring enough to change into pajamas. In fact, just the thought of undressing Hinata's body made her blush all the more. "It'll be better in the morning," she told herself, "everything will be all better in the morning…"

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"You know, this isn't that bad…" said Sakura (as Sasuke), grinning evilly.

"You may have a point, and at least this way I won't have to stay in Naruto's house…" sighed Ino (as Naruto) with an equally evil grin. The two 'boys' started giggling madly. Their brilliant plan was that since both Naruto and Sasuke lived alone, they'd both stay at Sasuke's house to bask in his absent glory. Who'd ever know?

"I call his bed!" cheered Sakura, dashing for his bedroom.

"What? No way, Sakura! You already have his body, why do you need his bed, too?!" yelled Ino, chasing after her.

"That's exactly my point!" pouted the boy defensively, sitting on the bed with an arm full of blankets. "When he comes back he's not going to want essence of Naruto in his bed! I'm just keeping it safe for him, that's all!"

"Okay, I guess you have a point…" sighed the other boy submissively.

"Ohh, Sasuke…!" moaned Sakura, taking a big whiff of the blankets he was holding.

"Don't push your luck, girly!"

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Okay, just because I don't know how this guy behaves… or lives… or operates… doesn't mean I won't be able to pretend to be him… Chouji swallowed hard. Who am I kidding? I'm dead!

"Gaara!" shouted a girl as she swung open the door right in front of Chouji; he jumped a little. "Where have you been?" she demanded, slamming her hands down on his shoulders and shaking him violently. "Why were you out so late? What were you doing? Why won't you say anything?" she shook him even harder until the poor boy was so dizzy he was sure he'd collapse.

"Gaara!" a boy stepped out from behind the girl and stared at Chouji sternly. "You weren't… 'reminding yourself that you exist', were you?"

"Uhh… yeah… yeah, of course that's what I was doing! You know, just confirming the ol' existence!" Chouji began to laugh nervously, hoping that he'd said the right thing.

The girl gasped and quickly took her hands off of him, taking a few steps away from the boy. "You… you didn't…!"

"Gaara, I thought you were over that!" cried the older boy.

Alright, NOW I'm confused… Do they no WANT this guy to exist of something? "Of course I'm not over it!" said Chouji flatly. "I have the right to exist, don't I?"

The girl turned away, shaking her head. The boy frowned at Chouji and said, "With this sudden lapse in your behavior, we're going to watch you like hawks! We won't hesitate to draw blood, Gaara!"

Chouji swallowed hard again. I am SO dead…

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"No one asked any questions?"

"No…"

"Do they suspect anything?"

"No,"

"Didn't they find it strange that—"

"NO!" screamed Shino (as Kiba), "NO, Kiba! No one asked ANYTHING! They don't suspect ANYTHING! It's NOT strange to them!"

"Jeez, you don't have to bite my head off…" grumbled Kiba (as Shino).

Shino groaned and slumped back against the couch. "They have no reason to think anything's going on… I mean, we go over to each other's house so often people practically expect it…"

"I guess you have a point…" laughed Kiba lightly.

"Arf!" just then, Akamaru came bounding out of Kiba's bedroom and jumped into 'Shino's' lap.

"Hey, Buddy! Sorry I left you at home… Heh heh, good thing, though; one of us might have ended up in your body!" The small dog whimpered and curled its tail down.

"I don't get it, how does he know it's you?" asked Shino curiously.

"Easy," chirped Kiba, nuzzling the puppy's nose with his own, "we have a special bound way deeper than face appearance."

Shino stared at them a moment and then said, "Alright, if you get your dog then I want my glasses."

Kiba stopped playing around and looked over at his friend. "Your… glasses? Why do you want those?"

Shino looked away, a light blush on his cheeks. "It… it's too bright without them—I'm not used to it."

Kiba chuckled at him but nevertheless took off the dark shades and handed them over. "And I think it's too dark with them! Here," he smiled brightly as Shino took them from him, still blushing.

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"This is normal for you guys?" asked Naruto (as Shikamaru).

"Why wouldn't it be?" said Shikamaru (as Chouji).

"You're staying the night at a girl's house! It sounds pretty perverted to me…" hissed Sasuke (as Ino) under her breath.

"I don't even know where to start with that…" groaned Shikamaru. "First off, her parents are home! It's not like anything could happen, and even if it did, none of us like each other like that!" he whispered angrily. "And we're all on the same team, so you're both lucky no one will suspect anything—they'll all think we're working on team strategies or something!"

"You don't have to get all defensive about it…" grumbled Naruto, looking away.

"I am NOT getting defensive!!" yelled Shikamaru, blushing slightly.

"Ino, sweetie, is everything alright in there?" called one of her parents.

"E-everything's fine, Mother!" chirped Sasuke back quickly.

When he turned back to the other two boys, Shikamaru frowned and said, "This shouldn't be too hard to pull off, but you guys need to just act the part!"

"There's no way I'm gonna act like a girl…" sighed Sasuke, turning away, irritated.

"And how am I supposed to act like you?" asked Naruto. "You're no fun at all! I can't stand just sitting around all day staring up at clouds!"

Shikamaru groaned and hung his head in defeat. "This is so bothersome…" he moaned.

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Note: Yep! That was chappie one! Stinks, don't it? Oh well… I can only hope that it gets more interesting… XP