Author's Notes: And yet another Season 7 frustration fic starring our favorite Mad Queen: Cersei Lannister!

Published last August 2017 on my ao3.


Cersei never thought they would actually hold true to their promise. It was an amusing sight—the white wolf and the lost dragon in the lioness' den. She had traps ready but Cersei was curious about this threat in the North.

Among this already strange ensemble were other interesting characters as well—Dothraki and Unsullied from the East, wildlings from the beyond the Wall, and a small variety of Westerosi warriors. But a tall figure caught Cersei's attention. Though based on the stiffness of the lady's posture, Cersei knew she'd rather disappear.

She watched the Lady Brienne of Tarth dart her eyes around observantly until she settled her gaze to the person beside Cersei. The dumb cow's expression changed from stern to longing. Pathetic, Cersei thought amusingly. She didn't need to imagine her brother's polite court smile. Cersei never thought to ask her brother if he was aware of his friend's feelings for him. Perhaps they'll laugh about it tonight.

"Lady Brienne," Cersei heard Jaime greet the woman as he vacated his place beside her and walked briskly toward the Lady of Tarth.

"Ser Jaime," she replied. Cersei wanted to roll her eyes at how flustered the woman was despite her formality. She looked like every other hopeful maiden that his brother confronted. She was ugly and awkward and mannish but she saw the very same giddiness in her eyes. The lady's gaze withered when it met the queen's though. Cersei merely smiled and nodded her head. She knew Jaime was fond of the woman but Cersei was most secure about his brother's loyalty so she merely hung back as an observer.

"I heard Lady Arya had returned to Winterfell as well," Jaime said casually as if that savage girl's wolf hadn't tried attacking their son.

The beast's eyes sparkled as she gave a quick nod. "Yes. Both Stark girls are safe in their home. So, I'm here in behest of Lady Sansa." The beast seemed to sour a bit when saying it. Cersei wondered why. "She apologized she couldn't come. She had duties to attend to in Winterfell."

Cersei heard her brother snort. They knew that sniveling Stark girl wouldn't set foot in the capital. It was a shame though. But at least Cersei can watch the wolf's guard dog hopelessly pine for Jaime.

"Look at you…" Jaime seemed to trail off and the cow looked confused as Cersei felt. Her brother's back was facing Cersei so she couldn't read his expression. She saw Lady Brienne's though and she was opening and closing her mouth like a fish.

Eventually she settled with information that stiffened both twins.

"Bran Stark is also home."

Before anyone could say something, another person, interrupted them.

"I've been looking for you, my beauty."

The large man stood beside the lumbering woman. He appeared to be a wildling. Cersei wrinkled her nose at his appearance—the layers of furs making him bulkier and the unkempt red mane and beard made Cersei wonder what kind of fleas lurked in it. The queen's smirk was back though when the wildling was openly leering at Lady Brienne. She looked uncomfortable, which was stupid in Cersei's opinion. That woman should count herself lucky someone would even think of her as a beauty. The north of the Wall must be cold and lonely indeed.

"And who might you be?" Jaime asked. Cersei noted the tension in his body. This was much different than his stiffness at the mention of the Stark boy.

"Tormund Giantsbane, milord," the wildling answered amusedly. "Husband of bears."

Cersei flitted her gaze back to the lady. The woman was fuming much to Cersei's confusion and delight. The Bear and the Maiden Fair came to Cersei's mind and thought how fitting it was. She nearly laughed at the thought of the ugly red-haired spawn these two would have.

"Well, Tormund, my advice to you is to stick to bears. I happened to save Lady Brienne from one—without a sword hand may I add—and if you so much as think about her name, don't be surprised if your already small shriveling cock becomes worthy of the Unsullied."

The queen nearly gaped at the ferocity of Jaime's voice. The wildling didn't seem to understand. "Words are wind, isn't that what you say?" He then turned to Brienne. "Oh I will get you, my Southern lass."

Brienne unsheathed her sword halfway and growled at the wildling. He went away but the comical smile on the man's face meant he wasn't going to give.

"That wasn't necessary, Ser Jaime," Brienne sighed when the wildling was out of earshot.

Jaime snorted. "You obviously needed rescuing, my lady. Has he been like that ever since?"

"Yes. No doubt he'll continue to be infuriating but I'll manage."

The woman held her head high and for once, she appeared certain and confident.

"Geld him for me if he tries anything," Jaime said,

"Gladly."

"That's the Brienne I know."

Cersei didn't know what expression Jaime gave but the beast gave him a tiny smile. Cersei wasn't too worried about it though. She was queen and with her growing babe, Jaime would be always hers.

But as soon as Jaime turned around to return to her side, she caught him with a stupid look she recognized in besotted squires. No. She mustn't think that. Jaime was loyal to her. His heart was in her clutches.

….

The fear she felt with the creature they brought from the North began subsiding. Despite its authenticity, Cersei had already decided what's to be done about it but she had to keep up with the pretense.

"In terms of alliances, perhaps a wedding can stipulate," Tyrion suggested.

"I am not going to use my sisters as a bargaining tool," Jon argued. "Sansa has been through too much. Arya cannot be contained. Bran cannot marry either. He is not himself."

Cersei felt the king in the north's glare on her and Jaime.

"I'll marry the big lady," the wildling spoke up. Cersei didn't look at the cow but she couldn't stop her chuckle, imagining her embarrassed face. Jaime didn't share his sister's amusement though.

"You are an absolute idiot, aren't you?" Jaime growled. "You are in the same side already. What good will that do?"

"I'll marry her." It was Bronn, Jaime's right hand who spoke up. You have quite the number of suitors today, Lady Brienne. "I was promised gold, a wife, and a castle. The lady can provide all that plus she even has her own island. That's investment!"

"You're not marrying her, Bronn," Jaime insisted.

A chair across them squeaked and they all watch Lady Brienne stand up, her nostrils flaring.

"I think I can decide for myself who I want to marry, Ser Jaime," the woman told him.

"Do you want to marry him?" Jaime shot back.

It was silent for a while and the whole room seemed to be holding their breath.

"No," the cow finally spoke. "But if you could stop speaking on my behalf."

"Alright," Jon intervened. "Lady Brienne is an honorable woman and we owe her a debt. She is not to be used for bargaining."

Cersei watched her brother and the lady sigh in relief. Then they proceeded to stare at one another in a silent understanding. It seemed as if only the two of them were in an entirely different world and none of them—not even Cersei—was allowed.

The two broke the spell and Jaime cleared his throat. "Now that that's settled—"

"Oh, you think yourself honorable enough to be deserving of the lady, hm?"

Jaime glared at the sellsword for his interruption.

"I haven't met a soul worthy and deserving of Lady Brienne," Jaime merely replied.

Cersei wasn't quite sure if it was a jape that no one would ever wed the beast but the passion in his words was not lost on her.

Jaime is mine and I am his, Cersei reminded herself. No other woman—no matter how beautiful or good-hearted—would ever replace her in Jaime's heart. Or so Cersei told herself.

….

Euron arrived as the guests were about to leave. Apparently, he had run into trouble but that would be discussed after Cersei will announce her real plan. She had asked Jaime and Euron to convene in her solar. Qyburn already knew and she sent him off to find possible countermeasures in case if the Northern armies fail.

Cersei could hear Euron taunting her brother again. She couldn't make out the words but no doubt Euron was trying to make Jaime jealous. She should let Jaime have his way with her later tonight.

Then she heard something crack.

"If you speak that way about her again, I swear I'll do more than just smack you in the face with my golden hand." It was Jaime's voice dripping in anger.

Stupid, Her Grace muttered under her breath. She'd told Jaime over and over again not to lose his temper with Euron Greyjoy. It wasn't like he or Tyrion didn't run their mouths taunting others.

Cersei raised her skirts about to run to the door before they kill each other when Euron spoke.

"Getting greedy aren't we, my lord?"

"You disrespectfully speak of even a single hair on Lady Brienne's head, I will make sure you don't only dribble blood out of your mouth but drown in it."

Jaime's reaction shocked Cersei. The way he said it sounded calm but the threat was still there. He sounded just like their father.

Euron gasped for breath as if preparing to speak but Cersei burst in the room before Jaime would be prompted to kill him.

"Thank you for answering my summons, my lords."

She sauntered in the room in the sultry way that she knew made the mouths of most men water. Cersei took a seat while the two men remained standing.

"We're not heading North," Cersei announced. She watched their reactions. Euron was like his usual self—showing his bloody teeth with a maniacal grin. Cersei made a mental note to ask about their spat later. Jaime was incredulous though.

"We gave our word that we'd help them battle these creatures," Jaime said. Cersei frowned at him. He'd been always going against her ever since he returned from the Riverlands.

"Let them annihilate each other," Cersei said. "Then we eliminate our enemies without having to lose supplies."

"And if they lose and the dead head to King's Landing?"

Jaime was annoying her.

"Then we have our armies to protect us," she snapped. "Their numbers will be fewer. Our armies will defeat them easily."

"They use dead bodies to fill their armies. What if they end up having even more men in their armies than we do?"

"Then we die but we have bigger chances of living if we stick to my plan."

Jaime's expression remained incredulous.

"I am the queen, Jaime, and you'll do as I say. Did you see Euron utter a word since I arrived?"

"Probably the only good thing in this conversation," Jaime muttered.

Beside him, Euron snorted then laughed. Jealousy wasn't working. Cersei had to stick to her usual strategy.

"Think about the baby, Jaime."

It did the trick. Her brother's face was completely resigned before it hardened to a stern expression. Cersei really would have to make sure she made it up to him.

"I-I'll inform the army of the plan, your Grace."

Cersei smiled sweetly at Jaime as he bowed before turning his back to leave. Once the door close, the corners of her lips dropped.

"Your lover troubling you, my queen?" Euron spoke. She glared at him.

"You were unusually quiet. I never took you as a man who learned to stay quiet."

"I will for you, your Grace," he replied smoothly. "But mostly I wanted to see how your sweet brother would take the news. He doesn't look too pleased. He seemed attached to that warrior lady leaving with the Northerners."

"Hm. Was this what your little spat was about?"

Euron smirked. "Aye, my queen. He hit me in the cheek with his golden hand when I wondered how that tall ugly beast of a woman he had been talking to wanted to be fucked." Suddenly, his voice dropped lower. "You worry about my loyalty and that's fair, but your brother, his loyalty isn't as firm as it seems."

Cersei's did all she could to keep her smile. "Your advice is kindly appreciated, my lord, but I don't doubt my brother's loyalty."

"Because he planted yet another child in you? If you're telling him that you're going to acknowledge that child as his when I'm supposed to be your consort, I think you're worried about his loyalty."

Cersei was sweating but she tried not to show her nervousness.

"I can assure you, my lord, his babe will not deter our arrangement."

"I know it doesn't but I'm merely saying, your brother, he doesn't think like we do. I've seen him. He doesn't approve of the things you do."

"He follows anyway."

"But for how long?"

Cersei dreaded the question but she trusted Jaime. He'd been with her ever since they were born, not a single person, especially not that dumb lumbering cow will ever change that.

….

A knock was heard on Cersei's door.

Finally, she thought. Cersei wondered how long making an announcement to the army took but she knew Jaime was an extra-miler when he had to be. She put on the smile he loved so much as she opened the door.

It immediately dropped when she saw it was only Qyburn.

"Your Grace, it's your brother, Ser Jaime." Cersei couldn't breathe. Was he dead? That would be horrible. Without her brother, she didn't have anyone she could trust to do her bidding. Not even Ser Gregor. Who knew what would happen to him if Qyburn decided to turn against her.

But her Hand's next words hurt her more than his death.

"It seems as if he's gone missing. There was no sign of struggle or blood. His room seemed untouched except his armor lay neatly on his bed and Widow's Wail is missing."

"Well find him!" she shrieked.

Jaime would never leave her just like that. He must be kidnapped or some new magic or mummery must have enticed him to leave. Whatever the reason of his sudden disappearance was, Cersei never felt so scared in her life.

….

It had been an hour since Brienne's watch but she was alert. She'd easily adopted to it especially having traveled in twos in most of her journeys. So when she heard the crunch of leaves behind her, she stood up in no time with Oathkeeper unsheathed.

"Would you really slay a cripple, my lady?"

Her breath slowly released but her grip on her sword remained.

"Easy, I come here alone." A figure emerged from the shadows. Despite only the fire being the source of light, Brienne saw it was truly Jaime, wearing a bulky cloak a peasant would wear, but she'd been with him long enough to remember what his face looked like in the illumination of the flames.

And he looked beautiful as always.

Brienne wanted to kick herself for thinking that. Instead, she lowered her sword. The sword he gave and insisted was hers and would always be hers.

She wanted to kick herself again.

"What are you doing here, Ser Jaime?" she asked instead. "I thought you were preparing the army for the trip North?"

He scowled. "I was. Until Cersei told me it was all a lie. So all her enemies will be destroyed without having to lift a finger."

Brienne gasped. Queen Cersei had lied to them. Brienne wasn't certain whether she should be raging at her or feeling sorry for Jaime. He was an honorable man, truly, and she knew such dishonor from someone he loved would break him. What did he say about oaths?

"A-are you okay?" she said, quickly deciding to be there for Jaime instead. "You said there was to be a babe." They hadn't made an official announcement but Jaime had whispered it to her in a short moment they were alone together. Brienne had berated her racing heart. She had been right to do so. She wouldn't admit, not even to herself, how much Queen Cersei's pregnancy had crushed her heart.

Jaime smiled bitterly. "They're safer in the capital."

Where they? Then again, was anywhere safe?

"What are you doing here then?" she asked instead. "Is your army traveling with you?"

He shook his head. "I couldn't risk it. Cersei might have me dead if I take the army."

"She loves you. She'd never harm you."

He laughed. It was a bitter laugh and she hated it. She would take his teasing more than this.

"When Tyrion met me in secret to allow the parley, I didn't even know he was meeting me. But you know what Cersei told me, after she told me she was having our baby?" Brienne remained silent, waiting for his answer. "She said never to betray me. She's mad, Brienne. Mad! And she doesn't care about me. All she cares about is seating her ass on that throne and destroying anyone that stands in her way."

"What are you doing here, then?" Brienne asked meekly.

"You said Valyrian steel kills those things?"

He opened his cloak and revealed his sword. She recognized it from King Joffrey's wedding.

"Widow's Wail?" Brienne gasped.

Jaime wrinkled his nose. "Still a poorly named sword but yes." He held out the sword and by instinct, Brienne did the same with Oathkeeper.

"They look lovely together, don't they?"

Brienne was waiting for him to look down on the swords but his gaze remained fixed on her. He was giving her that look again. She couldn't quite understand it. There's teasing. There's fondness. There's something like happiness. But it isn't quite those.

"Y-your journey must have been long. You should get some sleep, ser," Brienne told him, tearing her gaze away from him. She wasn't sure what was going to happen if they kept staring like that. "You can sleep near me so I can tell the person in the next watch not to harm you."

Jaime tried protesting that he wanted to stay with her during the watch but he began yawning.

"You win, my lady," he said with a chuckle. She saw a bag in his right hand and immediately went over to him and helped taking out his bedroll. Brienne spread it out while he smoothed it before sitting on it. Brienne sat beside him. He looked contemplative and she wondered what was on his mind.

Slowly but unexpectedly, Jaime tenderly took her hand and kissed it.

"Thank you for always believing in me. You have no idea how much it means to me, Brienne. I'll find a way to bring the Lannister army North."

"I trust you."

Their hands were still grasped and Brienne flinched away from it.

"Good night, Brienne," he said, laying down his head.

"Sleep well, Ser Jaime," she said, almost whispering.

"Jaime," he yawned. In a few minutes, his snores followed.

Brienne was not sure what was going on with Jaime and she wanted to ask him more questions, especially since he's headed North… to the Starks. The family his family had done wrong. She was worried for himself and his safety. But seeing how peaceful he looked sleeping, she thought they still had leagues to figure it out.

She watched as the firelight flickered upon his face. Brienne could see the lines that indicated his age but he was still handsome. Brienne burned hotter than the campfire.

Jaime is here, the secret girlish voice in her mind whispered. With you.