Harry Potter & the Philosophy of Stoners

Harry lay in his bed looking up at his ceiling; he was wondering why it all starts to look all weird if you stare at it for too long.

"Fuck, little man. If you want it to look fucked up youse gotta smoke some of this shit"

Harry sat bolt upright.

"Are you here to rescue me and take me to a secret wizard hideout?" He asked.

"What? Have already had some shit, you little motherfucker?" He looked over at his quiet friend after he said that, they both smiled as though sharing a private joke. "Oh, yeah. I'm Jay and this tubby fuck's my hetero life mate Silent Bob."

"Why's he silent?" Harry asked.

"Because, I fucking say he is. Okay? No, it's just because the tubby bitch thinks that he seems all mysterious if he does it." Jay said. Then, just as he finished speaking, he went into a sort of trance.

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A/N: I really only wrote this because I wanted to post something but couldn't be arsed to write too much. I'll update soon, though.