Rating: PG-13
Warnings: It is a yaoi fic, with language, teenage pregnancy, and just general strangeness. Rating may vary between chapters, but my hope is to keep it PG-13
Pairings: At the moment, 1X2
A/N: This takes place about a year after Endless Waltz. Special thanks to Sintari, my lovable beta reader, and more special thanks to anyone who R&R's. Much love.
Chapter One- Lost and Found
Redemption is the kind of thing that beats most of the standard "Price Is Right" gift packages. It's not like a new refrigerator, or a trip to some foreign country. It's a step up from that, and quite a bit cheaper, which is probably why so many people spend so much of their time searching for it. It also explains, partially, why on this night a war hero had stumbled into a church and sat down, having been entranced by the youth's choir practice. It also offers an explanation for the unwed teenage mother who sat a few feet from him. She was watching the singers and their moving lips, but the words glided over her head, and offered her no meaning for her life. Still, she sat and pretended to listen, because she did not want to go to the nursery's cribs and pick up her sleeping little boy.
The war hero, then called Heero, was watching this woman out of the corner of his eye. He could tell that she was tired and unhappy. Her clothes told him that she probably didn't have a solid place to live, and the viscous, congealing white spot over her shoulder spun a story for him about a child. Though it was a rarity for him to speak at all, he couldn't help but lean over and bridge the slight gap between him and this young woman, asking,
"Where's your kid?"
She glanced up at him, her eyes mired in a fog of terror, confusion, and sadness. "I'm sorry?"
He reached out with one lightly scarred hand, and let the tips of his fingers gently brush the stain that stuck out from the usual blackness of her shirt. "You have a baby, right?"
She nodded slightly, her eyes still wide. "He's almost five months," she added to her silence. The choir's notes hit a crescendo in front of them, and both pairs of eyes shot forward to them, before returning to their resting position, meeting each other.
"Where is he?"
"He's sleeping. In the nursery."
Heero nodded, managing to accept this as a minor pseudo-excuse. "What are you two doing here?"
He felt the sarcasm radiate off of her body as she quipped, "Oh, is it members only now?"
"No," he answered, staring blankly into her green eyes. She had carelessly thrown up this glamorous veneer of having her whole life together, tied up in a neat little package and left on the doorstep. The longer his eyes watched her, the faster it crumbled. It was the kind of thing she had grown sick of, the sort of game she didn't feel like playing anymore. He understood, because he'd felt it before, so many times while he was piloting a Gundam, floating around between colonies and not understanding what kind of purpose it could have possibly held for the future.
"I'm sorry," she whispered softly, letting one hand fall onto the pew beside her. She was exhausted; her head lolled back behind her, only holding on by the bones in her neck. "It's been a long couple of years, y'know?"
Heero nodded; he knew more than she would think he did. "You still didn't answer my question."
She rolled her head towards him, her crazed black hair sliding around one shoulder with it. "Question?"
"Why are you here?"
"Oh, right..." she sighed, "That." Her eyes slid closed as she turned her head back and slumped farther down in the pew. "I don't know... we just don't have anywhere else to go right now."
"Are you staying here tonight?"
"Probably not. All this religion would freak me out."
Heero let himself smile a little. The war was over; he could do that now. He stared at this woman, her languid, beaten frame, and he wanted to help her. He saw the scabs on her forearms, and wanted to heal them. He saw the bruise on one elbow, and he wanted to make it disappear. He saw the stains on her shirt, and he wanted to wash it. However, he had little knowledge of stain removal. His brain was suddenly caught with an inspiration. "Would you like to stay with me tonight?"
She sat up suddenly, and her eyes were filled with a glare. Clearly, she was not accustomed to strangers offering her kindness. "What do you want from me?"
"Nothing," he answered gently. "I just want to help you."
"Right. I don't even know your name. You could be a registered sex offender, or something like that."
"Well, I'm not going to hurt you."
He watched her eyes carefully, trying to see what he could find that would convince her. She was obviously torn between the Right Thing To Do (walk away) and her need for somewhere to stay. He could almost see the wheels in her head as they turned, over and over, trying to compute all of the possible options. Finally, she asked, "What's your name?"
"Heero Yuy," he answered, his mind completely vapid of the information he'd just turned over. Then, he came back to reality, and realized the stupidity of what he'd just done. What had he been thinking, giving this strange girl his name? What the hell was wrong with him. Suddenly, he needed his gun. He had to kill her; she knew his name. Then, he stopped, trying to regain control of himself. The war is over, he repeated in his head. I don't have to worry about my name anymore. I don't even carry a gun. I don't have to worry about any of that anymore.
"Heero Yuy?" He nodded. "The Gundam pilot?"
"Ex-pilot," he replied. He didn't want to think about that anymore. He didn't want to remember all of the things he'd done in the past, all of the lives he'd taken.
"Sorry," she retorted, rising. "I hate the war."
"Me, too," he answered. She turned back to him, her eyes shocked. "Really, I do," he added, as though he was sure she questioned him on that mark. Now, she was really confused.
"I'm Lela Donnelly," she said softly. "My son's name is Julian."
Heero nodded in reply. He didn't know what else to do. He rose, too, trying to meet her gaze from somewhere other than the subservient position he had. She still had a good three inches on him, her legs going on for miles. She was really quite beautiful, in a way that he didn't expect; her imperfections were what made her so perfect to him. "Nice to meet you." He extended his hand to her. She smiled warmly and shook it, her soft, cool hand pulsing against his rough one.
"Nice to meet you, too, Heero."
Heero twisted his key in the lock on his shiny brown apartment door. The gold-plated numbers read '4B,' as he opened the door. Behind him, Lela cradled her son in her arms; Heero had taken on the burden of her paltry backpack of possessions. On the other side were the adornments he knew well: kitchen to the left, with the light on, fridge half-empty and at least one empty bowl in the sink (likely more). To the right were the two bedrooms, one a complete mess, the other relatively neat, sans the fact that it had been used for storage recently. In front of them was a living area: the T.V. had been turned off, and a sleeping form sprawled on the couch. To Lela, it appeared to be a woman, scantily clad with long chestnut hair trailing down her back in a braid. Heero shut the door behind them, causing the figure the stir, and roll over. It flopped to the floor below, and kneeled, cradling their head in both hands.
"Well, look what the cat drug in," Heero began slowly, walking up to the figure. He squatted down beside it, and caught the chin in one hand. With the hands brushed away, Lela realized that the figure was actually a man, dressed up in women's clothing, with horribly smeared make-up, thick bangs and the goofiest smile she'd seen in quite some time.
"Hey, Hee-chan," muttered the soft voice, emerging from between the parted, smudged lips. Gently they kissed, and Lela felt a sudden realization flood over her. Heero didn't want to sleep with her; he was gay. Heero helped the other one to his/her feet, and then gestured towards Lela.
"This is Lela Donnelly. She's going to stay with us for a little while."
"Cool," he replied, sliding towards Lela. "Aw... who's the little kid?"
"Julian," Lela answered. "And you are?"
"Oh, right!" he exclaimed, hitting himself on the forehead with one hand. "Duo Maxwell."
"Another pilot?"
"Well..." Duo paled slightly. "Usually, I try and keep that on the down low, you know? I'm not exactly... proud of the war, and what happened. By night, I'm Megan Rose, lady of the feather boa." His lips split into a wide grin as he shimmied his hips. The skirt that crossed his knees jingled, and an elfin giggle escaped from Julian's lips. "Ooooh, you like that, little guy?" Duo quipped, leaning towards the bundle in Lela's arms. "Do you mind if I...?" He moved towards the baby, with hope illuminating his purple eyes.
"Go for it. Just... watch his head."
"No worries," Duo assured, taking the boy in his arms, and spinning him around, while emitting strange sputtering sounds. The skirt followed him as he went, with bangles jingling over his arms every time he lifted up or put down the kid. Heero was gently smiling from the sidelines then motioned to Lela to follow him into the kitchen. She looked hesitant, but the smile on Heero's face must have reassured her that nothing was going to happen; she went with him.
"Are you hungry at all?"
Lela nodded. "Julian is, too. It's been a little while since we've had anything substantial."
Heero motioned his agreement from the kitchen stove. "How does macaroni and cheese sound? It's about the best we've got up here for now."
"Fantastic," she answered dreamily, sitting at a chair that rested near a round table. One elbow propped up her head, as her eyes roved freely over the wild terrain of their crazy kitchen. It was eclectically kept; glass beads hung from some of the cabinets, and the walls were painted with colorful designs. "This is really... beautiful. Who painted all of this?"
Heero glanced up from the water, which had managed to take the longest time humanly possible to boil. "That was Duo. He works nights, so he spends a lot of his free time doing this kind of stuff."
"It's really nice. I didn't know that a person could be so violent and have still such strange... beautiful talents." She rose and went to one wall, letting her fingers feel the rough texture of the painting beneath it. A loud, high-pitched squeal was heard from the room beside them.
"Sorry! That was me!" Duo called. Lela burst out laughing; she couldn't help it. It amazed her how good Duo was with Julian, and how many lives he had taken just a year before.
"You don't have to worry about Duo," Heero said quietly from the stove. Lela turned back to look at him. "He used to live at an orphanage. He's really good with little kids."
"Oh, no. I'm not worried, I was just... thinking, I guess."
"It's strange, isn't it?"
"What?"
How much difference there is between the pilots you saw on T.V. and the pilots in real life. "Nothing. Is he on solids yet?"
Lela shook her head. "We can't afford it. He's been surviving mostly on a halved formula recipe."
"Does he like applesauce?" he asked, turning towards the fridge.
"I don't know," she whispered. She wasn't looking at anyone. She was staring blankly at the coffee table, tracing over a scratch or two with one finger. "I don't know anything. He likes keys; I have an old set from my house."
"It's none of my business," Heero began, looking up from the gently bubbling water, "but, if you have the keys, why don't you just go back?"
Lela looked up at him, a half-hearted smile on her face. "My mom changed the locks," she answered. "It was the last thing she did before she died." Tears pooled in the emerald eyes, and Heero didn't know what to do. He wished he hadn't brought it up, and abruptly turned back to the stove. Lela kept talking, babbling to no one, "The house is gone, and God only knows where the rest of my relatives are. Julian's all I've got now." Another squeal came from the room behind her.
"That was him this time!"
Lela giggled, that sort of choked giggle that someone gets, right as they know they're going to cry. A hot tear slid down her cheek, and she abruptly wiped it away with one ragged nail. "We're sort of trapped, now. I owe you big time, Heero."
"Ow! Fuck!" Duo cried obscenely from the other room. He came in with Julian in one arm, trying to swat away the chubby hand that had just gripped one of his bangs. "Oh, God, ow! This kid's got a grip like a professional arm wrestler!" Lela rose quickly, wrenching Duo free from Julian's cast-iron death grip. She tucked the baby against her shoulder. Heero looked back, and sighed with relief. Finally, Duo, the lord and master of human emotion, was here. That was a plus; Heero was total shit when it came to dealing with tears, or any pain except for the physical kind. She sat back down, and propped Julian up against her chest, her small breasts providing an excellent cushion as his hands clutching her outstretched thumbs. Duo sat down in a chair opposite her, and began fiddling with the keys on the table. He glanced up at Lela, who was staring at the top of Julian's head with a look of sad reflection, twin tears slipping down her pale skin. He reached behind him and grabbed a napkin out of the half-open drawer. "You okay, kid?"
She looked up at him, her eyes watery and wet. Julian was completely oblivious, happily bouncing, and waiting for Duo to play with the keys again. Instead, the brunette got up and wiped her face with the napkin. "Thanks," she whispered.
"What's the matter?"
"Nothing, I'm just... just a mess." Duo smiled softly, and slowly knelt down beside her. His head leaned against her shoulder, as he whispered,
"We're all a little messy sometimes." She looked down at him then, her knee still jittering the little boy up and down. "But, I bet I can get you cleaned up. Heero!" he called. Heero glanced over from where he was idly stirring the noodles. "I've got work to do. You prepare food, and don't go looking for your keys." He then grabbed the keys in one hand, and scooped the baby off of Lela's lap with the other. "And you, young lady, are coming with me."
She rose and followed obediently, not knowing what to expect at all. Heero watched as he led her into their bedroom and shut the door. He shook his head remorsefully. That poor girl had just entered Megan Rose's One Stop Makeover Boutique. There was no turning back.
Warnings: It is a yaoi fic, with language, teenage pregnancy, and just general strangeness. Rating may vary between chapters, but my hope is to keep it PG-13
Pairings: At the moment, 1X2
A/N: This takes place about a year after Endless Waltz. Special thanks to Sintari, my lovable beta reader, and more special thanks to anyone who R&R's. Much love.
Chapter One- Lost and Found
Redemption is the kind of thing that beats most of the standard "Price Is Right" gift packages. It's not like a new refrigerator, or a trip to some foreign country. It's a step up from that, and quite a bit cheaper, which is probably why so many people spend so much of their time searching for it. It also explains, partially, why on this night a war hero had stumbled into a church and sat down, having been entranced by the youth's choir practice. It also offers an explanation for the unwed teenage mother who sat a few feet from him. She was watching the singers and their moving lips, but the words glided over her head, and offered her no meaning for her life. Still, she sat and pretended to listen, because she did not want to go to the nursery's cribs and pick up her sleeping little boy.
The war hero, then called Heero, was watching this woman out of the corner of his eye. He could tell that she was tired and unhappy. Her clothes told him that she probably didn't have a solid place to live, and the viscous, congealing white spot over her shoulder spun a story for him about a child. Though it was a rarity for him to speak at all, he couldn't help but lean over and bridge the slight gap between him and this young woman, asking,
"Where's your kid?"
She glanced up at him, her eyes mired in a fog of terror, confusion, and sadness. "I'm sorry?"
He reached out with one lightly scarred hand, and let the tips of his fingers gently brush the stain that stuck out from the usual blackness of her shirt. "You have a baby, right?"
She nodded slightly, her eyes still wide. "He's almost five months," she added to her silence. The choir's notes hit a crescendo in front of them, and both pairs of eyes shot forward to them, before returning to their resting position, meeting each other.
"Where is he?"
"He's sleeping. In the nursery."
Heero nodded, managing to accept this as a minor pseudo-excuse. "What are you two doing here?"
He felt the sarcasm radiate off of her body as she quipped, "Oh, is it members only now?"
"No," he answered, staring blankly into her green eyes. She had carelessly thrown up this glamorous veneer of having her whole life together, tied up in a neat little package and left on the doorstep. The longer his eyes watched her, the faster it crumbled. It was the kind of thing she had grown sick of, the sort of game she didn't feel like playing anymore. He understood, because he'd felt it before, so many times while he was piloting a Gundam, floating around between colonies and not understanding what kind of purpose it could have possibly held for the future.
"I'm sorry," she whispered softly, letting one hand fall onto the pew beside her. She was exhausted; her head lolled back behind her, only holding on by the bones in her neck. "It's been a long couple of years, y'know?"
Heero nodded; he knew more than she would think he did. "You still didn't answer my question."
She rolled her head towards him, her crazed black hair sliding around one shoulder with it. "Question?"
"Why are you here?"
"Oh, right..." she sighed, "That." Her eyes slid closed as she turned her head back and slumped farther down in the pew. "I don't know... we just don't have anywhere else to go right now."
"Are you staying here tonight?"
"Probably not. All this religion would freak me out."
Heero let himself smile a little. The war was over; he could do that now. He stared at this woman, her languid, beaten frame, and he wanted to help her. He saw the scabs on her forearms, and wanted to heal them. He saw the bruise on one elbow, and he wanted to make it disappear. He saw the stains on her shirt, and he wanted to wash it. However, he had little knowledge of stain removal. His brain was suddenly caught with an inspiration. "Would you like to stay with me tonight?"
She sat up suddenly, and her eyes were filled with a glare. Clearly, she was not accustomed to strangers offering her kindness. "What do you want from me?"
"Nothing," he answered gently. "I just want to help you."
"Right. I don't even know your name. You could be a registered sex offender, or something like that."
"Well, I'm not going to hurt you."
He watched her eyes carefully, trying to see what he could find that would convince her. She was obviously torn between the Right Thing To Do (walk away) and her need for somewhere to stay. He could almost see the wheels in her head as they turned, over and over, trying to compute all of the possible options. Finally, she asked, "What's your name?"
"Heero Yuy," he answered, his mind completely vapid of the information he'd just turned over. Then, he came back to reality, and realized the stupidity of what he'd just done. What had he been thinking, giving this strange girl his name? What the hell was wrong with him. Suddenly, he needed his gun. He had to kill her; she knew his name. Then, he stopped, trying to regain control of himself. The war is over, he repeated in his head. I don't have to worry about my name anymore. I don't even carry a gun. I don't have to worry about any of that anymore.
"Heero Yuy?" He nodded. "The Gundam pilot?"
"Ex-pilot," he replied. He didn't want to think about that anymore. He didn't want to remember all of the things he'd done in the past, all of the lives he'd taken.
"Sorry," she retorted, rising. "I hate the war."
"Me, too," he answered. She turned back to him, her eyes shocked. "Really, I do," he added, as though he was sure she questioned him on that mark. Now, she was really confused.
"I'm Lela Donnelly," she said softly. "My son's name is Julian."
Heero nodded in reply. He didn't know what else to do. He rose, too, trying to meet her gaze from somewhere other than the subservient position he had. She still had a good three inches on him, her legs going on for miles. She was really quite beautiful, in a way that he didn't expect; her imperfections were what made her so perfect to him. "Nice to meet you." He extended his hand to her. She smiled warmly and shook it, her soft, cool hand pulsing against his rough one.
"Nice to meet you, too, Heero."
Heero twisted his key in the lock on his shiny brown apartment door. The gold-plated numbers read '4B,' as he opened the door. Behind him, Lela cradled her son in her arms; Heero had taken on the burden of her paltry backpack of possessions. On the other side were the adornments he knew well: kitchen to the left, with the light on, fridge half-empty and at least one empty bowl in the sink (likely more). To the right were the two bedrooms, one a complete mess, the other relatively neat, sans the fact that it had been used for storage recently. In front of them was a living area: the T.V. had been turned off, and a sleeping form sprawled on the couch. To Lela, it appeared to be a woman, scantily clad with long chestnut hair trailing down her back in a braid. Heero shut the door behind them, causing the figure the stir, and roll over. It flopped to the floor below, and kneeled, cradling their head in both hands.
"Well, look what the cat drug in," Heero began slowly, walking up to the figure. He squatted down beside it, and caught the chin in one hand. With the hands brushed away, Lela realized that the figure was actually a man, dressed up in women's clothing, with horribly smeared make-up, thick bangs and the goofiest smile she'd seen in quite some time.
"Hey, Hee-chan," muttered the soft voice, emerging from between the parted, smudged lips. Gently they kissed, and Lela felt a sudden realization flood over her. Heero didn't want to sleep with her; he was gay. Heero helped the other one to his/her feet, and then gestured towards Lela.
"This is Lela Donnelly. She's going to stay with us for a little while."
"Cool," he replied, sliding towards Lela. "Aw... who's the little kid?"
"Julian," Lela answered. "And you are?"
"Oh, right!" he exclaimed, hitting himself on the forehead with one hand. "Duo Maxwell."
"Another pilot?"
"Well..." Duo paled slightly. "Usually, I try and keep that on the down low, you know? I'm not exactly... proud of the war, and what happened. By night, I'm Megan Rose, lady of the feather boa." His lips split into a wide grin as he shimmied his hips. The skirt that crossed his knees jingled, and an elfin giggle escaped from Julian's lips. "Ooooh, you like that, little guy?" Duo quipped, leaning towards the bundle in Lela's arms. "Do you mind if I...?" He moved towards the baby, with hope illuminating his purple eyes.
"Go for it. Just... watch his head."
"No worries," Duo assured, taking the boy in his arms, and spinning him around, while emitting strange sputtering sounds. The skirt followed him as he went, with bangles jingling over his arms every time he lifted up or put down the kid. Heero was gently smiling from the sidelines then motioned to Lela to follow him into the kitchen. She looked hesitant, but the smile on Heero's face must have reassured her that nothing was going to happen; she went with him.
"Are you hungry at all?"
Lela nodded. "Julian is, too. It's been a little while since we've had anything substantial."
Heero motioned his agreement from the kitchen stove. "How does macaroni and cheese sound? It's about the best we've got up here for now."
"Fantastic," she answered dreamily, sitting at a chair that rested near a round table. One elbow propped up her head, as her eyes roved freely over the wild terrain of their crazy kitchen. It was eclectically kept; glass beads hung from some of the cabinets, and the walls were painted with colorful designs. "This is really... beautiful. Who painted all of this?"
Heero glanced up from the water, which had managed to take the longest time humanly possible to boil. "That was Duo. He works nights, so he spends a lot of his free time doing this kind of stuff."
"It's really nice. I didn't know that a person could be so violent and have still such strange... beautiful talents." She rose and went to one wall, letting her fingers feel the rough texture of the painting beneath it. A loud, high-pitched squeal was heard from the room beside them.
"Sorry! That was me!" Duo called. Lela burst out laughing; she couldn't help it. It amazed her how good Duo was with Julian, and how many lives he had taken just a year before.
"You don't have to worry about Duo," Heero said quietly from the stove. Lela turned back to look at him. "He used to live at an orphanage. He's really good with little kids."
"Oh, no. I'm not worried, I was just... thinking, I guess."
"It's strange, isn't it?"
"What?"
How much difference there is between the pilots you saw on T.V. and the pilots in real life. "Nothing. Is he on solids yet?"
Lela shook her head. "We can't afford it. He's been surviving mostly on a halved formula recipe."
"Does he like applesauce?" he asked, turning towards the fridge.
"I don't know," she whispered. She wasn't looking at anyone. She was staring blankly at the coffee table, tracing over a scratch or two with one finger. "I don't know anything. He likes keys; I have an old set from my house."
"It's none of my business," Heero began, looking up from the gently bubbling water, "but, if you have the keys, why don't you just go back?"
Lela looked up at him, a half-hearted smile on her face. "My mom changed the locks," she answered. "It was the last thing she did before she died." Tears pooled in the emerald eyes, and Heero didn't know what to do. He wished he hadn't brought it up, and abruptly turned back to the stove. Lela kept talking, babbling to no one, "The house is gone, and God only knows where the rest of my relatives are. Julian's all I've got now." Another squeal came from the room behind her.
"That was him this time!"
Lela giggled, that sort of choked giggle that someone gets, right as they know they're going to cry. A hot tear slid down her cheek, and she abruptly wiped it away with one ragged nail. "We're sort of trapped, now. I owe you big time, Heero."
"Ow! Fuck!" Duo cried obscenely from the other room. He came in with Julian in one arm, trying to swat away the chubby hand that had just gripped one of his bangs. "Oh, God, ow! This kid's got a grip like a professional arm wrestler!" Lela rose quickly, wrenching Duo free from Julian's cast-iron death grip. She tucked the baby against her shoulder. Heero looked back, and sighed with relief. Finally, Duo, the lord and master of human emotion, was here. That was a plus; Heero was total shit when it came to dealing with tears, or any pain except for the physical kind. She sat back down, and propped Julian up against her chest, her small breasts providing an excellent cushion as his hands clutching her outstretched thumbs. Duo sat down in a chair opposite her, and began fiddling with the keys on the table. He glanced up at Lela, who was staring at the top of Julian's head with a look of sad reflection, twin tears slipping down her pale skin. He reached behind him and grabbed a napkin out of the half-open drawer. "You okay, kid?"
She looked up at him, her eyes watery and wet. Julian was completely oblivious, happily bouncing, and waiting for Duo to play with the keys again. Instead, the brunette got up and wiped her face with the napkin. "Thanks," she whispered.
"What's the matter?"
"Nothing, I'm just... just a mess." Duo smiled softly, and slowly knelt down beside her. His head leaned against her shoulder, as he whispered,
"We're all a little messy sometimes." She looked down at him then, her knee still jittering the little boy up and down. "But, I bet I can get you cleaned up. Heero!" he called. Heero glanced over from where he was idly stirring the noodles. "I've got work to do. You prepare food, and don't go looking for your keys." He then grabbed the keys in one hand, and scooped the baby off of Lela's lap with the other. "And you, young lady, are coming with me."
She rose and followed obediently, not knowing what to expect at all. Heero watched as he led her into their bedroom and shut the door. He shook his head remorsefully. That poor girl had just entered Megan Rose's One Stop Makeover Boutique. There was no turning back.
