Title: You Know You're Obi-Wan Obsessive When...
Author: Cerasi
Co-writen by: Obi's Jaina
E-mail: Cerasi- mcgregorchick23@hotmail.com
Jaina- obischick@hotmail.com
Summary: The title says it all!
Spoilers: Ewan McGregor, Obi-Wan Kenobi
Category: Humor
Disclaimer: We don't own anything, and we never will, no matter how much we hope and pray.

Note to reader: We would like to dedicate this story in loving memory of our friend Tess. She was a wonderful friend and Jedi Knight. Tess, we love and miss you. We will never, ever forget you. May the Force be with you...always.


You Know You're Obi-Wan Obsessive When...

) Every pic of him you see online you just *have* to print out. (Even though you probably won't really want to.)

) You kiss his picture goodnight/good morning at least once a week.

) You have over 100 pics of him in your room, hanging up or otherwise.

) You MAKE posters of him when you can't find the perfect one.

) You have a calendar full of pics of Obi and you "faint" over it at least once a day.

) You dream of meeting him one day, even though you know it will never happen.

) You don't cry because Qui-Gon died; you cry because Obi must feel so terrible.

) You write his name EVERYWHERE-even on your homework.

) You fantasize about Obi constantly-good and bad.

) You learn by heart *all* of Obi's speaking lines.

) You jump up and start screaming wildly when Ewan's name appears in the credits.

) You start singing "We are the Champions" when Obi dices Darth Maul.

) Talk to ALL your pics...give your favorite a kiss...often.

) Talk to your favorite pic. Make it talk back.

) Kill anyone who disses Obi.

) Buy a cardboard cutout of Obi and worship it.

) Paint your room blue in honor of Obi's beautiful blue eyes and lightsaber.

) When someone calls your name you answer, "Yes Master?"

) Invite all your friends over and rent a Ewan movie, (Not TPM), insist he looks cuter with the Padawan braid, no matter what your friends say.

) Your boyfriend leaves you because he feels he can't compete with a Jedi.

) You start stalking Ewan McGregor.

) Change your last name to Kenobi.

) Have all your girlfriends call you "Obi's Girl"

) You've read every Jedi Apprentice book and can quote it chapter and verse.

) When Ewan has a new movie out you find a way to get tickets to the world premier, when you finally see him, you scream out, "I AM NOT WORTHY!" and fall to your knees, sobbing hysterically.

) Even though you're probably a girl, you want to be Ewan's stunt double in Star Wars Episode II.

) When you answer the phone you say, "Master, destroyers!"

) Remember, you can ALWAYS trust Jedi from the U.N.

) The plates on your car say, "OB4EVER"

) Instead of saying the classic "May the Force be with you," you say, "May the Hot Jedi Padawan be with you."

) You cut your hair in the Padawan style. You have to wear a hat through, because people on the street stop you all the time thinking your Sinead O' Conner.

) You dress up as Obi-Wan every year for Halloween.

) If little kids come to your house dressed as Darth Maul, "slice" them in half with your toy lightsaber.

) Your best friend gets you a Magic 8 Ball for your birthday, the only questions you ask it are, "Will I score a date with Ewan McGregor?" and, "Will I marry Obi-Wan Kenobi?"
And every answer is: "Signs point to no."

) You go out and buy the 12" Obi-Wan doll, get out one of your old Barbies, dress it up as you would normally dress, and stage a date with Obi-Wan.

) Your parents change their phone number because every time you find a new Obi pic on the 'net you just have to call and tell them about it. Even though they've probably never heard of Ewan or Obi-Wan.

) When you move into a new apartment you go out and buy two new Obi wan pillows for your sofa, when you get home you realize you don't have a sofa because you spent all your money on Obi-Wan stuff.

) You never leave home without your Obi-Wan Kenobi pin. (We have done this!)

) You watch Velvet Goldmine and freeze-frame every shot of Ewan without his clothes on.

) Every day you write love letters to Ewan, finally he writes you back saying, "Stop it. I'm married."

) You write a letter to the producers of all the movies Ewan has every been in requesting more nude seens.

) On Sunday morning your mother tells you to get dressed for church, your sister comes downstairs in a dress and heels, you come downstairs in your homemade Jedi Apprentice shirt and cut-off jean shorts.

) You have ALL of Ewan's movies.

) Ewan files a restraning order against you.

) After a staff meeting, you turn to your boss and say, "You were right about one thing Master, the negations WERE short!" --Thanx to Amidala :)

) Your AOL screen name is "Obis Girl"

) Your comupter password is "obi=hot"

) You have the Obi-Wan action figure and play/talk to it on a regular basis.

And there you have it!

Cerasi- mcgregorchick23@hotmail.com
Jaina- obischick@hotmail.com