++ Part One ++

▬ People leave and all that's left are the memories.
Memories that we didn't know we would cherish,
Memories that faded away as the years passed,
Memories that appeared before our eyes, as we
said unwanted goodbyes to those we couldn't fathom
losing. ▬

[The weather seemed to match my mood as I lay in my old room in the tiny red house I had once grown up in, I didn't have the strength to get out of bed even though I knew I needed too, but how did you say a final goodbye to the one person you had pledged to spend eternity with? It was too hard to even fathom getting through the next hour without him, never mind the rest of my life.

"Rae .. are you awake? We have a surprise for you"

The soft sound of my brothers fiance filled the silent room and for just a second I let myself think somehow it was Paul .. even though it was impossible. Pulling the blanket just enough over my head to peak at #Renesmee. I didn't have to say anything before the door opened just slightly and I found myself staring back at a familiar face, the tears that I was sure had been all cried out, started to pour down my face as I threw myself at my sister; she was the only other person who I had needed to get through today.

Minutes turned into an hour before #Bella came through the door along with her daughter and a few other girls, I didn't have the strength to fight them as they urged me to get ready, saything that everyone was already at the church waiting on us. It was the first time since I woke up that I had actually spoken, my voice sounded of foreign even I didn't recognise it.]

I'm not ready … I .. can't do this.

[Using what strength I had left, I ran into the small bathroom, locking the door as I sank down onto the floor with my back pressed against it, arms wrapping around my knees as I drew them into my chest and let myself sob and I was transported to a much happier time.]

-

▬ Flackback 5 years ago ▬

[ "This is it, Are you ready?"
My gaze flickered from the mirror over my shoulder to where my Dad's voice was coming from, Giving a quick nod before I bent down to hug him.

"I know your Mom would have wished she could be here, you look so much like her"

Even though he tried not to show it, I could see the tears welling up in his eyes as he spoke of her like she was just on vacation instead of gone.]

I know Dad, I miss her too .. I think she would have loved Paul though.

[He grinned and nodded before glancing to the door.

"We should get out there before your husband to be runs away. I saw him this morning, He's a nervous wreck."

I couldn't help but laugh at the expression on my Dad's face, it was getting late and I knew that everyone was out there waiting for us, #Sam had even pulled all the pups off patrol to attend our Wedding. #Emily and #Sue and even organised the food even my twin sister had came down from Hawaii with her husband for the wedding.

"There you .. OhMyGod, You look so beautiful"

Rebecca gushed as she rushed over to give me a hug, my grin widening as the rest of my bridesmaids filled into the room.

"You ladies all look gorgeous, but we should get it started."

Picking up the front of my dress as I followed behind my sister and friends; waiting for them to walk down the aisle first, before my Dad and I attempted it, Thankfully we didn't go with a beach wedding or getting my Dads wheelchair down the aisle would have been a challenge.

The look on #Paul's face when he saw me, was something I'd never forget. It was the way I had always dreamed my husband would look at me.

The wedding went all too quickly and slowly at the same time, and before I knew it; #Paul and I were married and sharing our first dance, it was easily the best day of my life. The day I pledged to spend eternity with my soulmate and best friend. I just didn't realise that eternity was only five very short years.]

▬ End of Flashback ▬.

-

[Rain was pouring down when Becca and Nessie had finally convinced me to get ready, I didn't even remember them coming into the bathroom or how they had got inside the bathroom … actually everything from the last few days had been a blur. When we arrived at the church, all I could remember was the day Paul and I got married, it was same place since La Push was so small and only had one church. It also happened to be the same place as my Mom's funeral years ago.

Most of the service was filled with people standing up to say what a nice person Paul was, I hated it, How could people who didn't like him even be here; pretending like he was their best friend. Finally someone said my name and I blinked up at them, momentarily forgetting why we were here or what I was supposed to do.

"Rae .. Do you want to say something?"

Yes, there was a lot I wanted to say. No, I wanted to scream. At these people, at the preacher, at my Dad and siblings for making me come here, but mostly I was angry with Paul, how could he just leave me like this, he knew more than most about the imprint bond, just like the wolf couldn't live without his imprint … The imprint couldn't live without her Wolf either, Why didn't he fight more to stay, my whole world was crumbling around me and he was gone … gone forever.

Consumed with so many emotions, I couldn't sit here any longer, the church was growing smaller by the second and I found it hard to breathe, hard to think and hard to move, I needed to get out of here, I needed this day to be a nightmare and when I woke up, I'd be wrap in his arms, crying about this and he would promise me that he'd always be there.]

I .. can't do this

[In one swift movement was up and running for the door, the weight of my grief felt like it was crushing me, There was no water around, but I was drowning and there wasn't anything that anyone could do to help me. They didn't understand … no one could possible know the amount of pain I was feeling. There was only place I wanted to be right now, my vision now blurred by the tears as I somehow found my way to our special place. I knew that as long as I was there, Paul would be there too.]