Greetings everybody! Man, when was the last time I wrote something? Anyway, hope you like this update on bloopers in the Halo universe.


As a wraith mortar was about to hit him, John threw a bubble shield on the ground.

"Why isn't it working?"

The mortar is about to hit him

"Oh son of a bi-"

Gets annihilated.

Director: CUT! Can somebody please tell me WHY it didn't work?


Tsavo Highway, Earth

The chief escorts a convoy of warthogs to Voi, but they all got annhilated by hostile brute forces. John was the only one left after the conflict, and so he walked alone on the road.

I walk a lonely road

The only one that I've ever known

Don't know where it goes

but its only me and I walk alone

Just as the Chief is about to jump a broken path, an LRV horn is honked, it drives up behind him and runs him over and he falls off the bridge.

"AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Oh man, you hit the Chief!"

"So what? He just got OWND!"

Director: Can someone go get him please?


A grunt and a brute captain are seen in a corner

"Stop molesting me!"

"No! I'll do as I please with you punks!"

Director:...Kill that brute please. I'm gonna hurl.


"Starry Night, MC activates bubble shield Take 2. And ACTION!"

The Chief throws the device on the ground, and a sphere activates around him. The wraith mortar hits the shield, leaving him unharmed. As the spartan is about to run, he hits the shield like its wall and falls on his back.

"OUCH!"

Director: Seriuosly, what's wrong with this thing?


Crow's Nest

Spartan 117 proceeds to stop the invading Covenant forces in the South Hangar. But he take an enexpected turn and sees an odd event take place. Out side a door was amarine knocking on the door. Yes, it's Tucker without his aqua (or teal) spartan armour.

"Hey, open up!"

"Password please."

Apparently someone on the other side wouldn't open the door. And that would be Doc.

"You gotta be kidding me! What password?"

"The password's for so we don't open for brutes."

"Do I sound like a brute to you?"

"Well you could be held prisoner by brutes."

"If I was held prisoner by brutes and knew the password, then the brutes could just force me to to tell you the password and you'd open the door for them."

Master Chief just stood there like the WTF on his face. That is if you could see what's really going on in his helmet.

"Okay, wellnow I'm definitely not gonna open the door."

"But we need ammo!"

"Well why don't you go ask your brute buddies, then?"

Tucker just kept banging on the door. No response.

"Sucks to be him."


Well, I hope you folks like it so far. I'm on spring break, so there'll be more chapters. Reviews please!

Master Chief: Don't ask what he's gonna do next. I'd tell you. But then I'd have to kill you.

Arbiter: Why am I not surprised?

Grunt: Why not, Arbiter?

Arbiter: It's sarcasm.

Grunt: Oh. Right.

Me: GET BACK TO YOUR STATIONS PEOPLE!

Everyone: YESSIR!

I swear to God, I see these kind of things too much.