Chapter one
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"But I don't want to run after her. Do you see that? That's gravel. I'm barefoot."
Musicookie sighed. "Inuyasha, it's not my fault you don't wear shoes. Just jump over the gravel, alright? Let's continue with the story."
Kagome ran to the well, frantic to reach it before he could catch her.
The chase was on.
"Kagome, get back here!" Inuyasha called. He suddenly slowed his pace as he hobbled barefoot over the pointy little rocks that littered the ground.
He hopped up and down, holding his feet and saying, "Ow, ow, ow." Inuyasha leapt to a grassy patch and gave a sigh of relief.
"Inuyasha! Catch her!" Musicookie began chucking nearby objects at him. This included a drink coaster, pens, a mouse, a printer, and a mug of green tea.
"Hey! Ok, ok, I'm going!"
Inuyasha leapt through the trees, hurtling from branch to branch. Kagome was almost at the well. Inuyasha landed neatly in front of her, crossing his arms and barring her way.
"Inuyasha, I can't miss this. It's an exam! Did you know this exam is 20% of my grade?"
"We'll miss the chance to get jewel shards before Naraku does."
"If I fail this exam, I fail the class. I'll have to repeat the 9th grade!"
Inuyasha grabbed her wrist and began pulling her away from the well.
Kagome began to say "Ss-"
Inuyasha flinched.
"Somewhere, over the rainbow way up high..." Kagome sang.
Musicookie held her head in her hands. "Kagome, what are you doing?"
Kagome smiled sweetly. "Well, I don't think you utilize my talents enough. As I just demonstrated, I am a very good singer. Why haven't you ever let me sing in your fanfics, Musicookie?"
"The situation has never called for it."
"Well, you're the author. You can make the situation require singing," Kagome pleaded.
Musicookie ran her fingers through her hair. "How about this, Kagome. I'll think it over later, and maybe I'll rewrite this part of the story."
Kagome smiled.
"As for now, I need to write the next scene. You two are dismissed."
Inuyasha and Kagome stepped to the side.
Musicookie called Sesshomaru, Rin, Jaken, and Ah-Un. With a few pitter-patters of the keyboard, Musicookie wrote a new scene: a meadow, filled with azalea shrubs and lit with bright sunlight.
Rin skipped around through the flowers. She picked a handful of the nicest looking flowers and walked to Sesshomaru.
"Lord Sesshomaru, I picked these flowers for you. They smell so nice!"
Sesshomaru stopped walking and surveyed her emotionlessly. Rin was holding the flowers over her head, as high as she could.
Sesshomaru was still for an entire minute, and Rin began to feel like she did something wrong. But suddenly, Sesshomaru bent down and delicately sniffed the bouquet. He sneezed. Rin watched in fascination as Sesshomaru sneezed repeatedly. After he sneezed a dozen times, he looked blearily at the flowers. Rin could see his eyes, and they weren't pretty like usual. They were red and watery. Sesshomaru's nose was also red, and he looked miserable.
"Somebody get this guy a tissue." Rin said, giggling.
Musicookie walked to him with a box of tissues, but Sesshomaru had already blown his nose in the fur boa that was on his shoulder.
"Lovely, Sesshomaru. You know how many girls dream of glomping that fur boa you wear? You just killed it for them."
"Those are azaleas. I am allergic to any plant in the family Ericaceae."
"Are you allergic to lilies?"
"No."
"Lilies it is then." Musicookie typed the word "lilies" in the meadow, instead of azaleas. Pop! Lilies appeared.
"Let's pick it up from where Sesshomaru smells the bouquet."
Sesshomaru bent over and delicately sniffed the bouquet. One could hear how stuffed and drippy his nose was.
Rin giggled and laid the bouquet on Ah-Un's back.
Jaken spoke up. "Foolish girl, you should not waste Lord Sesshomaru's time with silly flowers."
Sesshomaru silenced Jaken with a glare. Both Rin and Jaken started to giggle, desperately trying to stifle their laughter. Sesshomaru's glare didn't make him look intimidating. His golden irises were barely visible because his eyes were red and puffy. His nose was drippy.
Musicookie began laughing, and everyone else did too. Sesshomaru glared and stormed off the scene, leaving the meadow and venturing into a great white void.
"Sesshomaru, get back here!"
He didn't return.
Musicookie sighed and typed, Sesshomaru walked back to Musicookie. Sesshomaru had no choice, and walked back to her.
"Listen, Fluffy, you can't go over there. I haven't written that far yet. It's still a white, empty void. Who knows what will happen to you if you go there."
"Better than being laughed at here."
"I'm sorry about the azaleas. I had no idea you were allergic."
"I am allergic to any plant in the family Ericaceae."
"I'll keep that in mind. Well, we can't do this scene if you can't look intimidating. How about we do the evil scene, Every fanfic needs an evil scene, right?"
Kanna and Kagura walked to the trapdoor to the basement, and climbed down the ladder. Kagura's hand slipped on the slimy rungs of the ladder, and she fell. She snatched her feather from her hair, and caught herself before the hit the floor.
Kagura stood up and brushed herself off as Kanna dismounted the ladder.
"Smooth." Kanna said, in her soft, emotionless voice.
"Just keep going," Musicookie called.
Kagura ignored Kanna, and they made their way to the room where Naraku was.
Naraku sat in the dark, gloomy depths. Body parts of various demons writhed and twitched around him.
"So," he said. "What is Lady Kikyo up to this time?"
Kanna held up her magic mirror. In the mirror, Kikyo could be seen sleeping. She was snoring slightly, and she was wearing footie pajamas. In her arms was clutched a Inuyasha plushie.
Naraku chickled. "Looks like we've seen Lady Kikyo at her weakest. Next time I see her, I will threaten her. I will tell her that she must surrender her stolen souls and leave this world, or else I will tell everyone that Kikyo wears pink footie pajamas and sleeps with a plushie!"
He began laughing maniacally.
"Please stop ad-libbing, Naraku. Although that was pretty good, that's not what I had in mind for this scene." Musicookie wondered if she'd ever get this story written.
She debated on waking Kikyo up, but Kikyo wasn't needed until later in the story. Musicookie said to the Inuyasha cast, "I don't know what it is, but today seems to be a really bad day. I've got a paper to work on anyway. I'll see you guys tomorrow."
Musicookie saved the file, and closed the application.
Once she was gone, Inuyasha growled. "Jeez, what was wrong with you people today! I wanted to get to my big battle scene!"
Kagome sighed. "Poor Musicookie. She's just trying to write a good story."
Rin laughed. "Trying and failing. All she has me do is pick flowers, skip, and worship the ground Sesshomaru walks on."
Sesshomaru crossed his arms...arm. "She made a fool of me today. I have been displeased with her performance of late as this story's author."
All of the other members of the cast, including Miroku, Sango, Shippo, and Kirara, all pouted. "Yeah," said Miroku, "We weren't even in this chapter!"
Kanna spoke up. "Let's delete her fanfiction account. Who here knows her password?"
There was silence, except for Kikyo snoring somewhere.
"I don't think we should be plotting against Musicookie." Kagome said. "She is the author. You saw how she was with Sesshomaru. She made him walk right back to her. She has control over us. Even though her plans for this story aren't particularly exciting, it's still a good, well-rounded story."
Inuyasha said, "Well, I don't care what she does, so long as she gives me good battle scenes. A little sugar here and there is fine too."
Kagome's hair bristled. "Sugar? Sugar from who?"
Inuyasha shied away from Kagome. When he still didn't answer, Kagome began chasing him all over the file folder that contained Musicookie's stories.
Kagura said, "I know I don't like Musicookie. On her profile it says she likes Christina Aguilera. I hate that screeching tramp. Anyone who likes her music has lost it."
Sesshomaru said, "I want to give Musicookie a little payback. I despise azaleas."
"So, what can we do?" piped up Shippo, happy for a little mischief."
Sango raised her hand politely. "I have an idea. You all saw how annoyed Musicookie got when someone messed up the story. It started with Inuyasha and the gravel, then it was Kagome singing. What if...what if we play our roles badly, like today. It'll make her mad."
Rin smiled. "Perfect. We can mess it up so bad, she might have to rewrite the whole thing. And what's more, her exams are coming up. She'll already be so stressed out."
"We can behave badly? Sweet!" said Miroku! Immediately, his hand flew to Sango's butt.
Seconds later, he rubbed his throbbing cheek.
"Play our roles badly..." said Sesshomaru. "We shall implement this ingenious plan."
Shippo growled. "Will you stop using those big words? I can't understand you."
"Whatever," deadpanned Sesshomaru.
Kohaku spoke up. "Hey, does anyone know where Naraku got to?"
Everybody looked around. Kirara spotted Kikyo in a corner, sleeping. But Naraku was nowhere to be found.
Unknown to them, he was on another page of the story. Naraku was frolicking in the meadow from earlier, smelling the azaleas/lilies, and wondering why his character had to spend so much time in smelly, dark, and wet places. He hoped Musicookie would write a nicer role for him. He hummed his theme song as he skipped along his merry way.
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A/N: *groans* I ate way too much for thanksgiving dinner. I feel like I'm going to burst open. Anyway, like this story? I was laughing while writing and proofreading this.
Want a preview of the next chapter?
Kagome flung herself into Inuyasha, sobbing, "Why, Inuyasha! Why didn't you give him the cheese! Why!" She pounded his chest. "Why, why, why!"
"Ok, I can't let this go on any longer." Musicookie stared at them all in disbelief. "What was that?"
Nobody said anything.
"I'll tell you what that was. That was the most disturbing, random, and sickening lunch scene anyone could ever see in their entire life."
Kagome bit back a sob.
Musicookie shook her head slowly. "I don't even know what to say."
Shippo spoke up. "I do. These fries are gross."
