Singles Awareness Day
Batman circled the burning building below him, looking for the best window to enter. The report he had overheard on the police scanner of the arson of an apartment complex in the Narrows had all but screamed "Joker" to him. In this town, who else could it possibly be? Any other criminal wouldn't have dared, for fear of the clown destroying him for stealing his limelight. Although alleged to still be incarcerated at Arkham, it was common knowledge that the Joker had escaped three weeks ago, no matter how much the authorities tried to cover it up. Yes, the Joker was definitely here, and wherever he appeared, the Batman was sure to follow.
Spying an already-broken window, Batman took the opportunity and careened past the glass, rolling with his momentum onto the floor. He was immediately met with a pair of clown-masked thugs, confirming his suspicions: the Joker was indeed behind the fire. Four punches and two kicks later, he moved to the next room to begin his hunt for the escaped convict, leaving the unconscious criminals behind.
After fifteen minutes of combing every inch of the building, he had disposed of twelve goons in total, but had not come face to face with their leader, the mastermind himself. The blaze, meanwhile, was intensifying, and Batman knew that it was only a matter of minutes before the building collapsed on itself. Flames crackled all around the caped crusader's ears, yet there was no cackling to be found. Puzzled, he furrowed his brow. Where was he?
As if in answer to his unspoken question, the wall behind him shattered as two bodies crashed into its already brittle form. One, the ever-so-familiar lithe shape of his nemesis; the other, a balding red-headed man, presumably a resident of the place, with anger burning hotter in his eyes than the flames around him. He lunged at the Joker, attempting to throttle him, but the Joker's knife was quicker, and the next second was welded deep in the attacker's chest. The man fell back, blood pooling through his shirt, as the Joker watched his convulsions and laughed with glee.
His laughter, however, was abruptly cut off as a burning piece of the ceiling fell free, slamming onto his back. Dissolving into coughing and spluttering, he could barely breathe, let alone notice the shadow in the corner of the room that was moving towards him. Suddenly he felt the great weight lift off of him, and strong arms wrapped around his chest, pulling him to his feet. Disoriented and confused, he quietly submitted to the force that guided him forward, towards an upstairs balcony.
Batman was on autopilot as he led his enemy towards the balcony, away from the body that was screaming out its last breath in the room behind them. He couldn't think about saving the civilian, whom he was supposed to be saving; he couldn't think of how he'd regret this in the future; all he could think about was saving the Joker, for reasons even he could only guess at.
Hurling them both into the air, they fell to earth as the apartment complex, unable to support itself any longer, finally gave out and crumbled to the ground with them. Burning pieces of debris streaked past them as hero and villain collided on the ground, a black fireproof cape all that separated them from the flying chunks of hell in the sky. Batman huddled on the ground with Joker, cape draped over them both, squeezing his eyes shut as he waited motionless for it to end, while Joker struggled for breath beside him.
After what seemed like an eternity of earth-shaking Armageddon, the crashing and crunching subsided, leaving only the quiet crackling of small flames in its wake. Batman stirred, rising to his feet, as Joker coughed and wheezed on the ground, tasting ash on his tongue. When he finally regained control of his breath and thoughts, he slowly stood and faced his savior who was gazing at the smoldering rubble of the building before him. Joker slowly broke into a sly grin, his eyes narrowing with curious amusement.
"What was that for?"
Batman's eyes darkened as his thoughts were interrupted by the rusty, grating voice that pierced his eardrums. Tearing his gaze from the building's remains, he inclined his head towards the madman.
"I saved your life, Joker. Don't start questioning it unless you want me to."
With that, he turned to leave. Not missing the veiled threat, Joker couldn't help smiling further. He wasn't finished with the Bat just yet.
"Aren't you gonna kiss me?"
That got Batman's attention. His back still turned to the Joker, he stopped cold mid-stride, his eyes widening with shock.
"…what?"
"You know…" Joker crooned, unable to resist messing with the knight's head, "whenever the hero majestically swoops in at the last second to save a helpless soul from certain death, isn't he supposed to kiss said helpless soul as they ride off into the sunset?"
Batman rolled his eyes, infuriated with how ridiculous his enemy was acting. Ridiculously difficult. Remembering the knife handle protruding from the redheaded man's chest, he retorted, "I wouldn't exactly call you helpless."
"Ah, trivialities," Joker smirked back, gliding closer to the back of his hero, a lopsided grin plastered on his face. This was just too much fun! It was getting soooo easy to push his Bat's buttons after fighting him for so long. "Besides, what better way to celebrate Valentine's Day?"
Batman paused again, considering the date. Yes, this morning at work had been February thirteenth, and it was definitely past midnight by now, which would make today…Valentine's Day. The day of love and affection. No wonder Alfred had been more insistent than usual that he take the night off. But once again, instead of spending Valentine's snuggled up with some movie star airhead, he was stuck rescuing psychopaths from burning buildings. Yet another February he was a slave to his city and his cowl, unable to follow the pursuits of the heart due to the more urgent callings of his duty. His everlasting duty, which would curse every Valentine's Day after this for the rest of his life. He had taken to forgetting that such holidays even existed, to take his brooding mind off of what he was missing.
Turning back to face the Joker, his reason for his lack of holidays, he gave him an iron look of hatred.
"I am not kissing you," he said flatly, and turned again to leave once and for all, completely caught off guard by the Joker's response.
"You probably kiss like an eight-year-old anyway."
Joker pivoted to walk away in the opposite direction, knowing that Batman would still hear his rambling as he left. "I bet you're just too chicken. Too scared to face the facts. Just like I've told you over and over, I know why you saved me, and you know it too. You just can't stand to live in a normal world without little old me, as much as you'd like to convince yourself otherwise. But you can't walk away from the truth, and you'll realize it one of these days, so I'll just keep telling you and telling you and t-"
His words were cut short as a gloved hand shot out and grabbed his wrist, pulling him backward to turn him the other way as Batman's lips collided with his own. His eyes wide with shock at the unexpected contact, Joker stood frozen in place, unable to think or move as his foe covered his mouth with his luscious, wanting lips. Then, pricks of warmth began traveling through Joker's entire body, and slowly, very slowly, his eyes closed, relaxing into the kiss. He felt the arms of the other man wrap around him, one hand on the small of his back, the other on the back of his neck, fingertips running through his hair. He brought his own arms around the shoulders of the Batman, his hands enveloping themselves in the folds of the cape. Their bodies pressed together, surges of heat flaring at every point of contact.
For a moment that seemed to last forever they stood together, holding each other and kissing silently, their tongues dancing with one another in the airlock of their mouths. For all the passion their tongues exhibited, their lips never moved, simply held together motionless in the quiet pleasure of the moment, a pleasure neither one could ever have or enjoy with anyone else. They understood that fact, and tightened their holds on each other, never wanting to wake from the living dream.
Yet they were awoken and reality rushed back to them in the form of approaching police sirens in the distance. Gradually, their lips lessened the contact, and softly broke apart. Their eyes still closed, their faces millimeters from each other, they rested their foreheads together, almost as if lamenting their loss.
Batman's eyes were the first to open, and he slowly pulled his head further away, still holding the Joker in his arms. Joker, feeling the loss of contact, opened his eyes too, and met them with Batman's. Neither one could turn away, yet neither could they deny the keening sirens that were headed their way. Nevertheless, Joker's eyes remained locked on Batman's, his message clear: he wanted more. And what Batman wanted nothing more at that moment was to give in to his enemy's wordless request. For once in his life, he had felt peace, calm, and quiet bliss, and that was something that was hard to find in the world he had chosen to live in. Yet maybe, just maybe, for once he could choose to have both. As he returned the pleading gaze of the Joker, he thought of Valentine's Day, and what it could possibly have in store for him this year.
His arms gently slid from Joker's back to his shoulders, as he took a step back and held him at arm's length. Joker's eyes never wavered, but softened with understanding. He knew, as they both knew, that it could never be, not tonight, not in this world. Batman exhaled with his decision and released his hold on the madman, his legs forcing his heart away as he walked off into the night. Joker stared after him, for once in his life with nothing to say.
Happy Valentine's Day everyone! I hope you have more success with your romantic pursuits than Bats and Joker, they're having a hell of a time with it. Came up with this Friday, then whipped the whole thing up at 3AM this morning in time for Valentine's Day (or Singles Awareness Day in my case U.U). Hope you liked it! : )
And as an afterthought, I just listened to it and turns out the whole kiss scene at the end works really well to the song "When Harry Kissed Ginny" from the Harry Potter 6 soundtrack. Just so ya'll know (gosh, I'm such a Texan, using "ya'll" XD).
