Me: Yeahy! Finally got the damn thing up!

Hidan: You procrastinate way to Fucking much!

Me: Shut Up and say the disclaimer!

Hidan: FineLooks at script) PhoenixCharmer116 doesn't own Naruto, Thank Jashin! If she did the suspense wouldn't be torturing us, Orochimaru's head would be a lovely trophy her wall, Sasuke would be taking a dirt nap, and I would be her slave- WHAT THE HELL! THIS IS NOT IN THE SCRIPT!

Me: Is now! (Glomps Hidan)

---

Kinzoku Ryu

Chapter 1: Enter Katsuhiro, Ryu

"Oh this sucks ass!" a kunoichi muttered scrolling through fliers of wanted criminals, while leaning into the shadows against the wall of the inn she stayed at the night before. Her long braided canary blonde hair swayed in the wind and her hiate of Iwakagure shined brilliantly on her hip even though it had a deep gash running strait through the symbol branding her a missing- nin though she didn't give a rat's ass, Iwa could burn in hell for all she cared. She stopped on a certain flyer which had her picture on it reading.

Wanted

Name: Ryu Katsuhiro

Crime: Attempted murder of the Tsuchikage, killing 12 ANBU in the process if seen contact Iwa, 30 million Ryo reward.

Looking over the flyer the nineteen year old laughed. God that was what seven years ago and those Iwa shinobi were so persistent. Although, her head being worth 6 million Ryo was rather interesting. Pocketing the flyer Ryu's ocean blue eyes scanned the others in search of a new bounty hunt; it was rather pathetic how much they charged for a simple murder of a criminal and people wonder why no one goes after the cheap ones.

Jobs were hard to come by she had to make a living even though Ryu went after all the pricy heads she had a slight (Insert sarcasm) gambling problem. That was unbelievable bullshit she made the Sannin Tsunade look like a pro. Ryu was smart at gambling but always she'd end up screwing herself over and loosing her money. Stopping on a flyer Ryu read over the details.

"Lets see. Isaru, Rin wanted from Sunakagure for killing 3 ANBU, 16 Kunoichis, and 6 Shinobi, blah, blah, blah, 25 million Ryo reward." Ryu finished looking over her chosen flyer eyes turning into huge dollar signs showing her greedy side was kicking in by the way she was skipping over other information on the wanted criminal.

"Hallelujah, I'll at least be able to survive a week with the loot they want for this poor bastard" Ryu snickered pocketing the criminals bounty poster while shouldering her pride and joy, a Sitar which's music was really her only cure for loneliness. Checking her kunai holder she sighed grabbing her other belt compartment bag which held jewels of all shape and color. Grabbing four on the top she eyed each one.

First was a diamond shaped like a tooth to some wild cat, second an aquamarine in the shape of a fish's posterior fin, third an amethyst in the shape of an orb clasp in a dragon claw, and last a garnet in a diamond cut shape which was rather normal up to the rest.

Picking the Garnet she threw the necklace on her neck and began to head off only for a flyer on a bulletin board that was blowing slightly in the autumn wind caught her attention. Ripping it of from the board she read through the information.

The picture of the criminal was a man whose face was covered by a mask all you could see were his strange pupils' sky blue eyes. His hiate of Takigakure was adorned on the forehead of his mask. Rolling here eyes at the man's appearance she read through his information.

Wanted

Name: Kakuzu

Crime: Member of Akatsuki missing-nin from Takigakure, wanted dead for killing more than 250 differentNinjas 45 million Ryo reward.

Ryu's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. Lord she hadn't seen such a pricy head since the Uchia killer. But she had enough to worry about with the other just because she sucked at gambling didn't mean she was stupid to gamble her own life Akatsuki meant trouble and she didn't have time to be going after cult members. But pocketing the flyer for safe keeping she went on her way to where the man, Rin was it, was last recently seen which was somewhere in river country.

---Time skip three weeks later---

"This is the biggest waste of my life!" Ryu screamed frustrated jumping tree to tree after Rin. Boy did this man know how to damage Ryu's pride. Ryu was never really the girly girl she grew up around boy the first eight years of her life. But her outfit consisted of her wearing a ruby red sleeveless shirt with a mesh tank top underneath and a black skirt with mesh shorts underneath that.

Now Ryu's appearance was another story she was very pale it almost made her look sick and…lets just say puberty played its cruel games on her giving her a very boyish appearance and look like she was a mere genin. This brings us back to her current dilemma. If she had a million Ryo for every man who said she was a boy or had flat chest she wouldn't be bounty hunting. So to put in shorter reference Rin pissed her off bye saying her breasts were small making her vow to shove his head so far up his ass that no one would recognize him.

Making a Tsuchi bushin (Earth clone) she had it run ahead of Rin to allow Ryu to get ready for her finishing Jutsu. When Rin defeated her Bushin he noticed something that looked like garnet snaking up his left ankle significantly breaking it in the process making him scream in absolute pain making Ryu smirk.

Rin got to his knees grasping his ankle probably to make the pain go away which there was no chance in hell of happening. Opening her palm made the garnet stone which was on the ground come to life slithering back to her like a garnet snake.

"Any last words" Ryu chide making it go limp like a whip, about to enjoy giving this man a painful death for the smart ass remark about her breast.

Rin was about to speak when four kunai whizzed by out of nowhere hitting him in four vital spots, lungs larynx, liver, and heart. Making him gasp only for him to spit up blood and fall over dead making Ryu blink…wow that was very anti-climactic. Ryu had question marks floating around her head when two men appeared from the trees checking on the body of a once Isaru, Rin.

The shorter of the men with silver hair, magenta eyes and a gigantic tri-bladed scythe on his back checked his pulse on his neck and smiled. "Well this bastards dead" he laughed removing the kunai which were obviously his.

The taller that was from Takigakure rolled his sky blue eyes. "I can see that Hidan you hit his vitals in alphabetical order" he snapped making the other man Hidan fume in anger. Ryu added up in her head that she found freak central.

"You don't have to give me your asinine comments every time a kill someone" Hidan pouted childishly making the other man's eye twitch repeatedly. Honestly Hidan was worse than a woman PMSing if his weapon was to bitch someone to death his brain would implode.

"Just get the body so we collect the bounty on his head I'm sick of your constant groaning" the taller replied rubbing his temple already feeling a headache coming on. Now that pissed Ryu off she spent three weeks of hell getting to this man and they were going to get the bounty that was rightfully hers and blow her off like she wasn't there. Oh hell no.

"Am I invisible to you jackasses?" She screamed with malice in her voice making the two men look in her direction each with different expressions on their face. The falls-nin had the, I don't care look while Hidan's was more the surprised.

"Hey when did the underage prostitute get here?" a certain platinum haired man questioned. Now if Hidan had a high IQ he wouldn't' have said anything but his lovely comment stroke a little too close to home for the only female present.

"Excuse me but what was that bastard" she hissed with her teeth bared.

Hidan cocked his head to the side. "Deaf? I called you an underage prostitute" He repeated only to be rewarded a kunai to the shoulder. Okay so this girl had guts to attack him usually they would try to run for it.

"Not that fucktard before that" Ryu added in monotone directing it to the strange man with the concealed face.

"Here to get the body…why?" Kakuzu asked icily not liking where this woman was going with the conversation. That thought was soon clarified when she laughed insanely.

"Sorry to rain on your parade but the bounty on that mans head is mine" the ex-Iwa Kunoichi explained putting her hand on her hips.

"Wait a sec you a bounty hunter? More like you're every day average wh-"Hidan started only to stop when Ryu cut him off.

"Finish your sentence and my aim will be further south" she warned.

"You really do have guts to threaten members of Akatsuki" the masked man informed. That why he looked familiar to Ryu, well that explains the powerful chakra radiating off of them.

"You shouldn't judge or disrespect a lady" Ryu sighed dramatically while Hidan pulled the kunai embedded from his shoulder.

"I'll keep that in mind in case I ever see one" he spat only to dodge a kunai which was directed to his head.

"Hidan just kill the bitch already, you're wasting enough time as it is!" Kakuzu yelled outraged.

"Fuck off Kakuzu! Pull the 30 ft. stick out of your ass and shut up!" Hidan cussed.

Ryu rolled her eyes at the colorful language being thrown and the immaturity of the criminals, and these were members of Akatsuki? More like friggin Kindergarteners that's what!

They again ignored her and started throwing comebacks back and forth allowing Ryu to lean against a tree to enjoy the comical scene for a good thirty minutes until a man who looked like a lollipop due to the orange mask that covered his face wearing an Akatsuki robe came into the clearing watching the scene only to sweat drop.

"At it again are they" he asked Ryu.

"If you call making a complete ass out of yourself normal then yes" she replied standing.

"I'm Tobi by the way, I'm a good boy" he introduced.

"Ryu, I can't take much more of this so I'm going to take the body and go" she explained teleporting away along with the body.

---Another twenty minutes later the morons are still bickering -.-

The pointless argument finally ended with Kakuzu stabbing Hidan with his own scythe. (Lol) Ignoring the cursing Hidan, Kakuzu noticed that the body was gone.

"What the hell!" Kakuzu yelled looking over to Tobi "Explain now!"

"Well while you were arguing with Hidan-sama she told Tobi that she was going to take the nasty body and that she had better things to do than watch you to insult each other" Tobi replied calmly.

"And you didn't stop her!" Kakuzu said agitated.

"No was Tobi supposed to?" Tobi asked confusedly making Kakuzu fall over anime style and Hidan curse yet again.

"If I ever see that bitch again I will sacrifice her to Jashin!"

Somewhere far away…

Ryu sneezed. "Weird I guess someone is saying wonderful things about me" She laughed counting her reward money in a small inn in Sunakagure not knowing that karma was about to come back and bite her in the ass.


Yatta! I've finally typed the first chapter!

Hidan: Yeah can I go to sleep now it's two in the fucking morning

Sure anyways review or you won't know what'll happen next…also please no flames!

Well time to sleep PhoenixCharmer116 out! (Press the review button you know you want to)