Disclaimer: I own nothing. I am nothing.


It had always been a love-hate relationship. He loved him more than anything. He hated that he did. They both knew that they were supposed to be together, they just didn't allow anyone else to know.

"Leya, tomorrow night, meet me in the common room at…oh say…eightish." Sirius demanded from a blonde girl standing opposite him. The girl nodded and smiled cheerfully before she kissed him on the cheek and walked away.

Remus watched and frowned at the two of them. Why did Sirius always do that? He always hid behind the girls…trying to convince himself. Remus had to admit that it was quite a convincing act.

He always ended up watching him from afar. Watching him get dates with each and every girl in the school. Why did he have to love him? Why couldn't he stop? What was it about Sirius that made Remus love him so much?

Remus smiled at Sirius as he started walking towards him.

"'Ello, Moony." Sirius said as he put his arm around his shoulders, in a friendly way more than anything.

"Hey, Padfoot." Remus said smiling still.

They walked a bit further, out of sight of everyone else, talking about the latest quidditch game. Sirius took his arm off of Remus' shoulders and looked around, making sure no one was there. He looked back to Remus and opened a classroom door beside them. Remus went in first and Sirius next, right after another quick look to make sure no one was around.

Everything was in secret when it came to the two of them. Not another living soul knew that they were in love. Not James, not even Lily. Sirius was determined to keep it that way.

"Hi." Sirius said smiling as he took Remus' hands in his.

"Hi." Remus said before he leaned in a bit closer to Sirius. Sirius leaned back in and their lips finally met.

No one else existed during those moments. They were the only two alive. No one else mattered. Nothing else mattered. It was only them. It was the moments afterwards that everyone else seemed to be in their faces.

"I saw you talking to Leya…." Remus said quietly, sitting on the desk in the classroom.

"Remus…come on. I don't want everyone…" Sirius said trying to stay calm.

"You don't want everyone to know. You're happier pretending you're something you're not…" Remus finished for him.

"I never said I was happy…" Sirius said quietly. Remus swallowed hard as Sirius said that.

They always fought afterwards. Sirius was afraid and Remus never understood why. For years it went on like that. They always made up in the end though. Until the night before everyone's lives changed. They had a huge fight the night before Halloween, they didn't see each other again…not for 12 years.

"I missed you, Remus…" Sirius said quietly.

"I missed you as well…" Remus replied. They stood there quietly for a while, just looking at one another.

"I…er…I…still love you, Sirius." Remus finally said.

"Good." Sirius said as he took his hand.

"You look…horrible." Remus said smiling at him.

"You don't look so hot yourself, Moony." Sirius said as he smiled back.

It ended differently that night. There was no fight at the end. Sirius and Remus were back in each other's lives, and nothing could make them angry at that moment. They were the only two, again.

Remus walked into the Black's house one last time. He walked upstairs and opened the door to the room in which he had been staying in. He collected the few things he owned and put them into his duffle bag. He walked out and shut of the light. He walked down the hall, noticing that a lamp in Sirius' room was on. He opened the door and walked in. Memories came flooding back to him. A tear slide down the side of his face and he saw Sirius' night stand. There was a picture frame on top of it.

He picked it up and smiled at the 4 people beaming back up at him. Remus stood on the far left, next to Sirius, who had James on his back. Lily was standing on the other side, laughing.

Remus remembered that picture, it was right after graduation. James had jumped on Sirius' back at the last moment, and it seemed to be the funniest thing any of them had ever seen. Remus took the picture out of the frame, and a picture that was behind it fell out onto the ground at his feet.

Sirius never once told Remus that he loved him back.

Remus bent down and picked up the picture. It was of he and Sirius. He couldn't help but laugh a bit at the picture. Sirius had a contemplative look on his face, his fingers placed on his chin, looking at him. Remus had his hands in a shape of a handgun off to the side of his face. This picture was also taken right after graduation. Remus was slightly surprised that Sirius still had pictures from that long ago.

He still held both pictures in his hand as he turned off the light. He walked out of the room and bit his lip as he closed the door behind him. He walked out of the house, and now had to go find a way to move on with his life, and live knowing Sirius was gone, again.

Remus finally realized why everyone agreed with that saying. It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. He had a second chance to make things right with him. What more could you ask for?


Lame ending. Oh well, please review!