Me: Oh my god, this is depressing. Where did it come from? Why did I write this? Brain, what the hell? I was gonna write something fluffy. Fluffy, like cute little puppies and kittens and rainbow farting unicorns. What the hell is this? Sure, there's been much, MUCH worse, but I normally go into those intending to be depressing. This is just... ugh, why you do these things, subconscious?
Waring: Spoilers, mentions of character death, crying, womens, alcohol, Cross swearing, um... I can't think of anything else. And really, a lot of this stuff happens in all these, but I felt the need to mention them here. Also; the mentioned character death is of characters who canonly died, and who we didn't know anyway.
She hated being back at Head Quarters, almost as much as she hated Adam and his stupid clown face and balloon body. No, she did hated it as much, more so even, because now Malcolm Levilier and all his stupid little stooges were around, and there were guards outside her room. Fucking guards. As if the little idiots could stop her if she really wanted to leave. Though it was amusing to see their reactions to her demands they get her Romanee Conti if she was to be locked up as she was. She never denied claims of her sadism, and she certainly wouldn't start now by denying that she found their tears amusing. At least Klaud was there to keep her company, though the woman adamantly refused to give in to her flirting, at least with the idiot guards in the room.
"Honestly, Cross, you knew this would happen, so why did you even bother coming back?" The sharp tone from Klaud actually had her wincing and leaning away, not expecting such anger behind the woman's usual scowl.
Vaguely wondering what she'd done to deserve it, the redhead could do nothing but shrug as she shifted to sit sideways on the couch, tucking one leg up onto the seat as she leant back against the armrest, crossing one arm behind her head while the other absently fiddled with the glass of rather cheap red wine. Examining the other woman led her to believe that whatever she'd done, it really had pissed off the blonde, which made her glad the monkey was occupied with a bowl of fruit the guards had brought as a peace offering; the little creature tended to mirror its Accommodator's moods, and the thing was creepy enough as it was.
"Am I not allowed to come back on occasion? Or to ensure my idiot apprentice doesn't get her stupid ass thrown in the holding cells because of this whole catastrophe?" Despite her casual tone, she was itching to demand answers from her fellow General, wanting to know why she was so angry but also wanting to ask about another one of their "co-workers."
Klaud still refused to look at her, just as she refused to actually drink from the glass in her hand, though Cross couldn't blame here there. The wine really had no redeeming qualities what-so ever. "Of course you're allowed to, Komui has been beside himself attempting to get you back here, but no one ever expected for you to show up on your own. Off of the Ark, of all things."
Mentions of what had happened the last time she'd stumbled out of a Gate into Headquarters went unsaid, especially mentions of how plastered she'd been and how Neah and Adam had personally dropped her off in Komui's office with the simple request of ensuring she didn't die of liver failure. It simply wasn't talked about. Mostly because Cross didn't actually remember that event.
"Hey, there's a perfectly good explanation for that and it's even in the official report, so don't go scolding me over little conveniences." She kept her eyes on her own glass of wine, knowing without looking that Klaud had finally turned to her, if only to glare at her with her one visible eye. It always pained her to look at Klaud and see the same one-eyed gaze that looked back at her from her reflection, knowing that under the woman's bangs were scars that were garishly similar to the ones that lay hidden under her mask. It always reminded her of what was, what could have been, and what could never be fixed or brought back.
Slowly looking up from her glass, she ignored Klaud's glare in favor of gazing steadily back at her for a long moment before reaching over to set the glass down, sitting up straight and resting her hands in her lap, leg still resting on the couch, though she shifted to rest her ankle over her knee as she tilted her head slightly, continuing to study the other woman. She knew she was unnerving the other woman, but given her tendency to avoid the other's eye, she wasn't all that surprised that suddenly having the red gaze of her remaining eye fixed on her was making Klaud sweat.
Voice low and pitched in a carefully neutral tone, she continued to gaze at her steadily, "Why are you angry at me, Klaud?" The way the other woman fidgeted was rather gratifying, and she couldn't help the slight twitching of her lips before she managed to suppress the face splitting grin that was attempting to twist her mouth into some grotesque parody of a smile. She'd had enough of those sharp-toothed "smiles" to last her a while yet, after that mess with Joyd on the Ark.
Honestly, what had Allen been thinking, trying to "exorcise" a Noah?
Klaud's answer was slow in coming, and the woman had looked off to the side where Lau Shimin was throwing grapes at one of the guards, who was too scared of bringing the General's wrath down on himself to try to stop the little monkey-like Innocence. She waited patiently for her answer, eye fixed on the blonde strands covering burn scars that hadn't healed cleanly at all. When she finally did reply, her voice had an odd airy quality to it, as if she wasn't quite with Cross anymore, off in space as her thoughts drifted.
"Did you know my students died, Cross? Or rather, that they were killed? Murdered? There were no visibly fatal wounds, but when they did the autopsy… they were all missing vital organs. Organs, Cross. Not their hearts, either. Nothing that would ensure a quick death. They suffered, all because some sadistic Noah decided to play with them. Winters' team, too. Except Suman. He was turned into a Fallen." The woman's gaze was back on her, but it was glazed, still off in space, until she finished. The glazed look in her oddly colored eye suddenly sharpened, focusing on Cross in an accusing, betrayed look as the glare returned.
It was obvious what she was getting at. The words were unspoken, but they were there all the same. "You weren't there for us." hung heavily between them, an accusation that she couldn't deny, that she wouldn't even try to make excuses for. Sighing heavily, she allowed her eye to close as she reached up and ran one gloved hand through her hair, for once uncaring of the mess it made of the vermillion strands.
"What do you want me to say, Klaud? Do you want me to apologize for the actions of another? Do you want me to say I can make it better? Because you know as well as I do that I can't do that. That I won't do that. I won't do it again, not after… I can't, and I won't, and if you dare ask I'll hurt you, I swear I will." Opening her eye enough to look at Klaud through her bangs, she was unsurprised to find the other woman with tears running down her cheek, her glare still on Cross but her gaze unfocused, turned inward.
The guards were edging toward the door, unsure of how to take this strange conversation, but Cross couldn't bring herself to care. But Klaud had long since known her true nature, so all the woman did was continue to glare angrily at herself and Cross. She could only grunt in discomfort when she found herself with a lap full of sobbing blonde woman, wrapping her arms around her friend to offer what comfort she could for the actions toward her "children." Honestly, for all that people called her a heartless bitch, they sure came to her for comfort all the time. It was times like this that she really regretted leaving, if only because it meant that it gave time for Klaud to stew on her sadness so that when she finally broke down and had the opportunity to cry on Cross, the dam positively burst.
At least she didn't have to worry about Winters crying on her, even if by some miracle the man actually gave a damn over the deaths of his students.
Running one hand through Klaud's hand in an effort to comfort her, the Melody of the Fourteenth fell unintentionally from her lips, the words coming easily despite it having been over thirty years since she'd actually heard them. Sometimes she really missed Neah, for all his insanity and other weird quirks. Listening to Klaud's slowly fading sobs, she decided that she would never be in her position, would make sure she never fall crying into the arms of one of her oldest friends, and that said friend never had to see her break down.
"I won't let you die, Allen Walker. If only for my own selfishness."
