This is my first Shizaya fanfict, so be kind of nice. I'll probably update it depending on the response I get, so if you like it, please say so! If you don't, don't be a jerk about it D: Thanks!~

Summary: Izaya has had it, he's tired of his life and has no where, and no one to run to. He turns to drugs to fill the empty hole in heart that only love could fill... After being missing for 3 days, Shizuo and Shinra search for him, finding and Izaya that was nothing like the Izaya they thought they knew.

The first step: Admitting the Problem

I stood up to yell at this intruder in my home. "I don't need any damn rehab clinic! I'm not some weak school girl, if I want to stop, I will." Feeling light ended... I must sit down... I can't believe Shinra thinks I should go to a rehab clinic... How embarrassing, so I drink a lot, everyone drinks. It's not like I'm addicted or anything...

"Please, Look at yourself Izaya-san!" Look at myself? I can't stand to even walk in front of mirror. "You look like you haven't slept in days, and it almost looks like you've been crying!You can barely even stand up straight... I can tell you're about to fall over! You're probably incredibly dehydrated!"

"First of, I, Izaya Orihara, do not cry!" I smirk at him. I was lying, but I can never let him believe I'm that weak. Secondly, I'm standing just fine, aren't I?" Lying... My knees felt like they were about to give out, probably because I haven't had anything but alcohol in my system for about the past week... "I don't need this right now."

"Why do you insist on arguing with me! Please, Izaya..." Oh, don't 'Izaya' me, you prick, making me feel guilty... ick, making me feeling at all, how repulsive.

"Shinra~" I smile and skip around to be behind him and grab his shoulders. He looked at me, obviously confused by the gesture. "Get the fuck out of my home." I shove him forward, towards the door and he stumbles slightly. "Go on! Out out!~ I have business I must attend to!"

"... If I don't see improvement, it won't just be me coming back here to drag you out of this hole you're digging yourself." He walked out of the door and slammed it.

"Well jeez~ No need to be rude!" I shout, he could still probably hear me... I'm becoming an alcoholic, NO, No, no... I'm not. It just makes me feel better when I have no where to run.

I pick up an entire bottle of sake and pop off the cap. "I have no one to run too, no where to go..." I hang my head in shame before taking a drink straight from the bottle and tilting my head back, consuming as much as I could with one gulp until my throat was on fire.

Shizuo's POV

Where is that damn flea? Normally I see him at least every other night creating havoc in Ikebukoro. It's been almost four days and I have yet to see him once, or even hear about him. Maybe he finally got his ass out of this city. Good riddance, have a nice life. Well not really, I hope you have a terrible one.

"hmm.." It was getting to be almost two in the morning, but I had no desire to go home for some reason. But it's not like I could just go to a bar and have a drink, I am the monster of 'Bukoro after all. I don't just casually prance around without hearing whispers... those endless whispers.

A noise came from the alley in front of him, like something had fallen over, and he could hear heavy breathing.. Was everything okay? I quickened my pace to check out whatever it was.

I turn onto the alley and stop, I see what looks like a person, laying on the pavement. I take a step forward slowly. "Are you alright?" The figure rolls over, looks like some scrawny ass guy in a fur trim jacket... wait, fur trim...

Those crimson eyes seemed so beautiful, but desperate in that moment. He looked directly at me with eyes glazed over. "Sh-Shizu...chan?" Izaya Orihara, of all people I meet up with in an alley. He looks so... helpless.

Izaya got up, I could see that his knees were buckling and for some reason, his face was flushed. He reached his hand in his pocket and pulled out his knife, taking another step toward me. It looked like he was about to fall over. He went to step again, but dropped his knife and started to fall forward.

I ran, I ran to catch him. "What the hell is wrong with you, Flea?" I set him down and kneeled down in front him, to look him in his eyes. Damn my good nature, Why me? He didn't respond to me at all, just looked down. "Hey! Are you listening to me?" I shake him slightly.

"Shi...zu...chan..." He looked up at me, face still flushed, looking as though he was about to cry. Holy shit, he looks cute when he's like this... Wait, this louse, cute? Why aren't I killing him while he's down? What the fuck is wrong with me? I blinked at him and he made a sudden forward motion, embracing me.

My arms dangle beside me, do I hug him back? "I... I.. t-think.. I have a.. p-problem.." He was drunk, extremely drunk... I wrapped my arms around him, tightly embracing him. This whole time... I thought I knew him, he was terrible, he destroyed lives, he was a nuisance to human kind, wasn't he? This person in front of me, he's not the Izaya that I thought I knew, what else can I do but embrace him.

"... I'm here for you." I pick him up and put him on my back and begin to walk back to my apartment. Wait... He doesn't look to well, I'll go to Shinras.

If anyone had seen us, they would have probably thought they had entered some alternate universe, the two monsters of Ikebukoro, not hurting each other and still close. Is now really the time to start caring about this damn fle-

"Th..thank you... Shi..zu..ch-" And just like that, he fell asleep on my back. I could feel him breathing, they were short breaths.

"Well... fuck" I walk onward.

Izaya POV

Don't start caring for me, you're just giving me hope to cling to, you hate me, get away from me... this isn't how it's meant to be. Shizu-chan is so warm... Maybe just this once, I'll cling to someone.

I wrap my arms tightly around the monsters shoulders.

Thud, thud.. thud, thud... thud, thud... His heartbeat was constant and comforting, I could feel my eyes closing. "Thank you, Shizu-ch-"