Kate sat on the floor in in front of her couch, leaning back, her head between Castle's knees. In the past few weeks, he had tried in vain to get her to call him Rick, but she was having none of it. Plus, Ryan and Espo would notice that something had changed, and she just wasn't ready for that. She scooped up some noodles with her fork – chopsticks were overrated – and tilted her head back to look at him.
Castle leaned forward to meet Kate's eyes. Since they had been together, the teasing, entertaining sparkle which he had been seeing less and less often, was in them almost all the time. She was just fun – and as well as loving their new relationship, since that night, it felt like he had gotten his best friend back as well.
They finished their dinner, and Kate pushed up on Castle's knees to sit on the couch beside him, putting her back against the arm rest and draping her legs over his. He grinned and slid off her 4 inch stiletto heels, and tickled her feet. She kicked him playfully, and he responded by grabbing her ankle and kissing her toes. She couldn't help giggling – a sound which, before she'd started dating him, she couldn't remember making since she was about 13.
They were going to watch a movie together – Kate had suggested Rosemary's baby – which was arguably the most scary movie ever made. After a few more playful things, and a kiss which made them both seriously consider rethinking their plans for the night, Kate slithered off the couch and put in the dvd. Castle kept telling her she should get a blu-ray player – he had even offered to buy her one, but she was happy with her old one – and she knew exactly how to work it.
The movie started and she snuggled into Castle. She wasn't particularly scared, but she just liked being held by someone. Even with Josh, and even all those years ago with Will, she hadn't let herself let anyone hold her – she had had to be strong, and independent, so she could continue the battle that had been her life. But now – she just didn't want life to be a battle any more. She had realised that her mother wouldn't have wanted that. Living was more important than revenge – and even justice wouldn't bring her Mom back to life.
Castle put his arm around Kate and pulled her closer to him. The movie was exciting, but he had seen it before, and watching her was more interesting. He watched her face change with her emotions as she reacted to what she saw; the way she bit her lip when she was anxious, the way her eyes widened when she was afraid – and the way her brow furrowed when she was thinking that he had found cute since the day they met.
The movie was almost at the end, and it was a bit too short for Kate because she didn't want him to leave yet. She wanted to stay in Castle's arms as long as possible, and that was always the story, every time she was preparing to leave his apartment. When the movie ended Castle asked if she wanted him to stay, but Kate said he had to go home and get some sleep. He said that if she moved in with him they wouldn't be having this problem.
He leaned in for a soft kiss on her lips because he knew she couldn't say no to his mouth on hers, but she took his hand and said that they needed to think about Alexis and the situation they were putting her in. Alexis was the only one who knew about them and that was already too big a secret to keep to have her keeping them living together a secret too. So Castle thought for a moment and said that Kate had a point, and that it will not always be like this but just until they find a way to tell Gates. He gave Kate another gentle kiss, and Kate said that their love was definitely worth protecting.
The next day they were at the station and Kate was already at her desk when Castle came in and sat down next to her, asking where Ryan and Esposito were. Kate said they were just wrapping up the previous case they had so Castle gave her a quick, soft kiss and said he would see her that night for dinner.
Kate couldn't wait to finish the paperwork from the case so that she could be with Castle. She was outside of his door when it suddenly opened and Castles hand took hers and pulled her in. Castle had cooked his famous spaghetti Carbonara so the place smelled intoxicating.
Kate sat at the table and looked at Castle and his blue eyes as she ate. When dinner was finished they went to the couch and turned on TV, and she leaned her head in Castles lap. He kissed her and put his arm around her. Kate looked up at him and said that she had never felt more loved than in that moment. She took a deep breath, and added that she wasn't even sure if she wanted to keep their relationship a secret any more.
He was amazed that she had taken such a big step. He pulled her so she was sitting, looking into his eyes again.
"You serious?" He asked her.
She thought about it. And although she wouldn't have believed she would have got here so quickly, she really did. She nodded, and that was enough for him. He pushed her down on the couch, and kissed her, hard this time, and so passionate. She ran her hands through his hair, and kissed back for all she was worth.
They didn't even make it to the bedroom. Alexis was staying over at a friend's, so they stayed in the living room all night. When they were completely exhausted, they lay on the floor, staring at the ceiling. They were both grinning from ear to ear. Suddenly, Castle stopped grinning – he had just thought of something.
"Kate – we were so quick, I didn't-"
She cut him off. "It's okay – I didn't want you to. Don't worry about it."
Castle assumed she must be on the pill – and Kate was happy to let him think that. Honestly, she had just felt so close to him, she hadn't wanted there to be anything between them, and when he hadn't thought of it, she hadn't wanted to interrupt things, either. She kissed him again, and she saw him relax. She wasn't worried – pregnancy wasn't even in her mind. It was the wrong time of month, anyway.
She fell asleep in his arms. When they woke up, she was already almost late for work. She hurried to get ready, showering quickly in his spectacular bathroom, wishing there was time to ask him to join her, but knowing that would make her inexcusably late. She found a shirt of his, and put on her black pants from the night before, glad that she hadn't worn a dress. She tied the shirt so it was neat, and when he saw her, he laughed.
"You do know it's obvious where you've been all night?"
She grinned. "Yep. I've never liked having to explain things – this way, I won't have to."
Castle laughed even harder. "D'you think I should wear your shirt, then? Just to make things really clear?"
They continued this cheerful banter even as they were getting into the cab they had decided to share. Castle loved seeing his shirt on Kate – somehow, it made her his. It made him sure that she wasn't going anywhere.
Kate looked at Castle, knowing he was watching her, and as she took hold of his hand, she knew her life was just the way she wanted it.
