This is my school-is-almost-starting-and-I-didn't-write-that-much piece. It was inspired by the song "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks. It will eventually become a multi-ch story, and I have plans to make a companion piece for the Naruto character Sakura. But writing this took my mind off my terrible sunburn, so I hope you enjoy it.

When Maes Hughes walked into the office used by Roy Mustang and his subordinates, it was strangely quiet. The snow outside muffled sound, but not to that big an extent. Glancing around, he took note of the way cigarette smoke was coming from underneath a desk and the flashes of blue partially hidden behind several potted plants. There was only one explanation: Hawkeye was on the warpath. She wasn't the most pleasant person on good days, but on bad days… It was a wonder that the walls weren't full of holes.

At this point, Maes had two options: Run and save himself, or stay and try to save his best friend. As he was still feeling bad from letting Roy suffer the last time, he settled on the first one. Squaring his shoulders, he bravely walked fully into the room.

At this point, he started chattering away nervously. "Hey Havoc, good to see you. Fuery, did you get new glasses? They look good. Has anyone seen Roy and Hawkeye? I have new pictures to show them."

Havoc, shaking all the while, slowly raised a finger to point at the inner office.

"Thanks, ol' buddy," Maes bubbled, trying to conceal his fear. If they were in there, it meant Roy was receiving all of Hawkeye considerable might. He slowly opened the door, ready to see something probably violent. He wasn't let down.

Hawkeye was leaning over Roy's desk, menacing him with dual pistols. "And what do you do the next time you get paperwork that will ensure the shooting range with be able to buy new targets when the old ones are completely destroyed?"

Roy hesitated slightly. "I… um… sign it immediately, because otherwise you'll use me for target practice."

"Good."

And with that one word, Maes realized that Riza Hawkeye could be a bitch when it came to what she really wanted.