A/N: First, my native language isn't English but I always read FF in English so I decided to try writting one. Any grammatical and spelling mistakes are mine, so if you see one just let me a comment about it :) Thanks!
Also, this is a three-shot RPF. It's NOT Quinntana but RIVERGRON. I don't know... I'm a huge fan of Brittana and HeYa but after season 4 I just thought that maybe Quinn/Dianna deserved a chance with Santana/Naya. So I give it a try. Hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee and I do not know the people I'm naming here (but I wish I did!). This is a fictional story loosely based on real people that I do not actually know. All characterizations and events are a product of my imagination, even if I wish they weren't just that.
"I'm in love with you"
Chapter 1
Naya's POV
I'm talking with HeMo when the subject comes up.
"Hey, have you heard form Di?"
"Yeah, we were texting yesterday. She's still in Paris, sooooo in love with the city" she imite our friend.
"Oh"
HeMo can feel the disappointment in my voice.
"What's wrong Nay?"
"Nothing, it's just... I think she's avoinding me"
"No, what, why?"
"She's not answering my texts since..." I try to remember when was the last time I received a text from Di "I don't know, since New Year maybe? And first I thought it was because she was too busy, or maybe she had bad signal in Paris or something like that, which I know it's ridiculous 'cause she had Internet in her cell... but now you tell me that you texted each other, so..."
I'm defeated. I don't know why Di is ignoring me but it's killing me. I've tried to figuere out if I did something to her but nothing came to my mind. I just miss her so much.
"Did she say something 'bout me?" I ask. Maybe Heather has some clue.
"Not to me" I sigh and HeMo hears me "I'm sorry honey. Try asking Le, she talks to Di like every day"
"Ok" my door opens and Sean comes in. He waves at me and I slightly smile back "Hey girl, Sean it's here. Talk to you later, 'key? Take care, both of you" I smile on the phone thinking in Heather's belly and hear Heather chuckling.
"We'll do. Love ya Nay!"
"Love ya too!"
Sean comes to where I'm standing in the kitchen and hugs me from behind, placing a soft kiss on my bare shoulder.
"You ok?"
"Yeah..." I lie, watching my cellphone. Maybe, just maybe, I can try calling Di.
Dianna's POV
I'm updating my blog in my hotel suite in Paris when my phone starts buzzing. I take it to check the caller ID. It's Naya so I let it keep ringing until she hangs up.
I've been doing that to her since I filmed my last Glee episode of Season 4. By that time she had started dating Big Sean and I just couldn't keep talking to her like nothing happened because something did happen to me.
I was in love with her.
I still am.
I found that out some moment around Season 2 and back then I thought that maybe it was just a phase. I mean: Naya's gorgeous, funny, sincere, an extraordinary singer and such a good person. She knows exactly how to make you feel special, how to make me feel special. And it hit me... it hit me hard.
But I was wrong and the feeling didn't disappear. Then the live tour happened. We shared a lot of time toghether. We shared hotel rooms, plain seats, camerinos, dinner tables, beds... We walked around hand in hand. She started calling me "my girl" and I just melted.
Back at home we became almost inseparable. When the break came we went on a trip toghether. By that moment I already knew that I loved her way too much and not precisely as a friend and I was doing a huge effort to disguise my feelings but at one point it was just too much. So one night she was saying goonight to me and I leaned in and kissed her. I just couldn't help it. It was barely a touch, my lips giving her a peck in hers, but it meant the world to me. She didn't push me away, in fact she didn't do anything, and as soon as I pulled away I run to my room and didn't talk to her 'till the next morning. We never talked about that, and it wasn't because she didn't try...
After that I talked to Ryan and asked him if he could break Santana and Quinn apart. It was easy 'cause Santana was having this major Brittana storyline and Quinn really didn't have nothing to do with that. The writters reunited them for the graduation party in Season 3 and then they parted ways. I was really relieved.
Season 4 was easy. I was busy with other proffesional commitments so Quinn barely appeared in the episodes. I was ok with that, really. By then I felt I couldn't deal with Naya because every time I was with her I just stared at her, fulfill with a need to hug her and kiss her. I still remembered the touch of her soft lips and I...
Then "I do" happened. She was even more beautiful than usual and all happy because all the cast was in set toghether. She acted like her usual her with me, all friendy and flirtatious and I was literally dying. Worst of all, Quinn and Santana had some intense moments in the episode. I read the script before Naya and begged Ryan to supress the Quinntana kiss. The fans were going to hate me (well, hate the writters I guessed) because Quinntana was a fantasy for a lot of them but never happened ultil that moment and they wasn't going to kiss, but I didn't care. I supposed Ryan guessed how difficult it was going to be for me because he agreed almost inmediately. I had never told him how I felt about Naya but some people had seen it anyway; Lea, for example. She can read me like a book. But I still had to slowdance with Naya; it was the most bittersweet thing I'd ever did.
After filming that episode we barely kept in touch. She e-mailed and texted me in regular basis but I only replied her sometimes, until one day I just stopped. I don't know why. I guess I thought that would be the easiest way to forget her.
Well...it wasn't.
Finally the phone stops buzzing. She left a voicemail. I'm about to erase it when I change my mind. I miss her voice, I haven't heard it for months. In fact I miss all of her so so much. So I hear the message instead.
"Hey Di, it's me, Naya. I call 'cause... I haven't heard from you for a while and I'm kind of wondering, are you ok? (a pause, a sight) I mean, I know you are ok 'cause HeMo told me. Are we ok? (she sniffles a little and then her voice is just a whisper) I don't know what I did wrong Di, but I'm sorry. Like really sorry. I just want to talk to you 'cause I miss my friend so much. Give me a call when you have a min, 'key? (she pauses again) I love you"
When the message finishes I close my eyes. I hate and love the way she makes me feel, like I'm the most important person in her life even if I know I'm not.
I play with my phone for about an hour until I decide to give her a call. The phone rings three times before she picks it up.
"Hello?"
"Hey Nay, it's..."
"Di! Oh my God girl, it's so good to hear you!" she sounds incredibly happy and I can picture her smiling in her kitchen, all bubbly because I called her. I can“t help the smile forming in my lips. Like I said: she knows how to make me feel special.
"Yeah, you too. I kinda miss you" I say to her like it isn't a big deal, what is a huge lie.
"Glad you do! 'Cause I tried so hard to reach you but it seemed you didn't want to get caught"
"Sorry for that"
"It's ok but..." she sounds calmer now "are you going to tell me what happend to you?"
I shrug my shoulders, stand up and walk towards my double-sized bed.
"I'm ok Nay" I play dumb although I know what she's talking about.
"Ok..." she doubts but asks anyway "...so... are you going to tell me what happened with you and me?"
I gulp. I don't want to talk about it because I don't want to lie to her, but I can't tell her the truth either. She waits for a couple of seconds while I think of an answer.
"Di..."
"I'm sorry, ok?" it comes out a little harsher than I intended to and we both are taken aback, so I repeat it softer "I'm sorry. I just... I couldn't talk to you, ok?"
She waits again but I don't say anything so she sighs.
"I can't fix things between us if you don't tell me what's wrong hon" she whispers in a soft and sweet tone.
Her voice and the term of endearment hit me and my breath becames heavier. She just can affect me that much. I take a deep breathe and close my eyes before talking again.
"Nothing's wrong" I reply. I'm being stubborn but it's my defensive mechanism "There's nothing to be fix"
"Yes there is" she says patiently "because you're mad at me and I don't know why, but I don't want you to be"
"I'm not mad"
"Yes, you are" she insists.
"No Naya, I'm not mad at you"
Ok, maybe I'm a little mad now, otherwise I wouldn't call her 'Naya', but it's her fault. The conversation is leading nowhere and I'm tired of it. She has no right to make me feel this way. I want to hang up and go to bed and sleep for, I don't know, ten hours.
"So what are you?" she asks firmly.
"I'm in love with you" I think to myself.
And then I realize I actually said it out loud. It was just a whisper but Naya heard it, I'm sure, because all of sudden she is quiet. I begin to panic.
"Nay..." I beg. In the other side of the line I hear a masculine voice calling her name. I feel sick.
"Di I have to go" her voice is so different from before. She doesn't sound worried or defeated or sweet anymore. She sounds so...neutral. It hurts.
"I'm sorry, I..."
"Don't be" she interrups me.
"Nay..."
"Really Di. There's nothing to be sorry about. Talk soon. I..." she cuts her sentence and I bit my lip. She can't tell me she loves me anymore. "Take care, 'key?"
"I will..."
Just with that the telephone goes dead.
