Note: Originally written back in 2002. Paramount owns the characters so no infringement intended.

Heavenly Oops

By Kanay

0600 Hours

"Computer, initiate privacy lockout for captain's quarters, authorization Janeway omega blue 9-2-1."

Captain Janeway's mind raced a million miles a minute as she frantically paced the room, ripping off her tunic in disgust and throwing it onto the sofa.

"What were you thinking? You have no business even wearing this uniform!"

She tried to shake off the memory that was causing this deep disturbance within her, but wishing to do something and actually being able to do it were two entirely different things. She learned that lesson all too many times in her life.

"You've gone too far this time. You've lost your mind," she continued scolding herself. "You've crossed the line, Kathryn. There's no turning back now."

With one hand on her hip and the other covering her eyes, she forged on with her pacing, wishing that somehow this would all turn out to be nothing more than a nightmare, that things would be ok. A quick glance at the wall clock and she realized she had less than one hour before the senior staff briefing in the conference room. "Then," she said, acknowledging how real this all was and accepting her fate, "it's all going to come crashing down on you." She could feel her heart thumping louder with every passing tick of the clock.

Desperate and mortified by her behavior, she felt the only thing at this point that could possibly calm her nerves was a stiff drink, so she replicated a whiskey and downed the warm liquid in one gulp as she recalled the actions that brought her to this place.

Earlier that morning, she found herself unable to sleep…again. She didn't know why but her sleep had been becoming more restless in weeks past. When it first began she took warm baths to sooth her achy bones, then she consulted The Doctor when that didn't work, but he suggested it was stress since he couldn't find anything medically wrong with her. That led to some counseling with Tuvok and eventually a search for her spirit guide again with Chakotay's help. She even entertained one of Neelix's ideas for Talaxian relaxation techniques, but the idea of lounging in the pungent gelatinous fluid he gave her for hours on end made her think twice on that one.

Then she began spending her off hours with Seven.

At first it was innocent. A game of velocity here…some chatting in the messhall after dinner there…It was all innocent. In the beginning.

Then somewhere between the late night philosophical discussions in her quarters and the constant visits to the cargo bay she lost her mind, or so it seemed. She began making excuses to see Seven. Any excuse at all just to see the woman. Suddenly she wanted—no, she needed Astrometric updates daily. Anyone from Astrometrics could have delivered the reports but she requested Seven to deliver them in person. And then there were the "chance" encounters, running into Seven on various decks of the ship. If she hadn't personally asked the computer of Seven's whereabouts before these "chance" encounters happened it might not have been so bad, but she was slowly being consumed by these feelings of…she didn't know what it was. She hadn't experienced anything quite like it before in her life. The Doctor gave her a clean medical exam so she knew there wasn't anything wrong with her, yet something still didn't feel right. Her nerves were a jumbled mess, her thoughts were scattered, and the only time she felt at ease was in Seven's presence.

But then one night in her quarters while discussing the significance of religious beliefs among humans, lights half impulse and a bottle of Bajoran wine later, an overwhelming desire struck her and she decided that it might be best if they didn't have any more late night discussions in her quarters. It was shortly after that night that the late night visits to the cargo bay began.

She knew Seven's regeneration cycles as well as she knew anything about her ship, and some might even say she knew them as well as she knew the back of her hand. However, Seven had a history of working late and skipping cycles so she always checked with the computer before making the journey down to deck 8. "Making rounds" was what she called it to anyone who asked why she was roaming the corridors in the middle of the night, but she never stopped anywhere else but the cargo bay and always went straight back to her own quarters when she was done.

The first few visits were brief. She would just walk inside the door and watch from afar. The last thing she wanted to do was disturb Seven.

"But she looks so beautiful," she would tell herself, unknowingly inching closer every night to get a better look at the woman who captivated her thoughts and set her soul on fire.

Over the course of a few weeks she worked up the nerve and managed to get right up to the alcove, even standing on the step to become eye level with Seven. Seven's eyes always remained shut but they fluttered under her lids. Janeway just watched in awe, unable to understand how something so horrible as the Borg Collective could give birth to this beautiful creature. She knew Seven would have been beautiful had the Borg not assimilated her, but there was something definitely unique about her that she suspected the Borg were solely responsible for. She studied Seven's facial implants, recognizing the complexity of them, and concluded it wasn't anything physical about Seven that made her special.

It was her heart.

...How much Seven longed for acceptance, strived to please, aimed for perfection, and loved. Yes, loved. Seven had been willing to sacrifice herself numerous times for the safety of this crew, a crew that had been less than kind to her when she first arrived but soon grew close to her heart like nothing else in her life. She formed friendships among people who openly despised her, but most of all, as she continued on her way to rediscover her humanity, she developed a connection deeper than any other in her life with the woman who helped liberate her.

Janeway became lost in her thoughts and had unconsciously begun tracing the outline of Seven's cranial implant. Her fingers slowly wound down the curve of Seven's jaw before circling her lips, barely touching them but still able to feel the warmth below her finger tips as breath from Seven's nostrils tickled her fingers. She closed her eyes and imagined what it would feel like to kiss those lips, tender and full and welcoming. Before she was aware of what was happening, she acted on her impulse, softly touching her lips to Seven's for only the briefest of moments. It was pure bliss, unlike anything she imagined, and when she pulled away she whispered a heartfelt confession.

"I love you, Seven."

And then it hit her.

A tiny jolt from Seven's body brought her back to reality, back to the cargo bay, back to the alcove where she was standing, watching Seven.

Kissing Seven.

Oh my God! What have I done? Though Seven's eyes remained closed Janeway suspected Seven was alert enough to recognize what just happened and would be stepping down from the alcove at any second demanding an explanation. She had to leave.

Panic set in as she ran from the cargo bay and headed for the only place she knew she could seek refuge. She was less than an hour from her duty shift but knew her quarters would provide the safe haven she needed while she sorted this all out.

"Chakotay to Janeway."

The hail broke her from the memory and brought her back to the moment. She still hadn't come up with a solution as to how she was going to handle this though.

"Janeway here," she responded.

"Everyone's in the conference room. Did you want me to go ahead and start the briefing?"

"No, I'm on my way. Janeway out." She didn't want to leave this room but the good thing about being captain is that when duty calls there is no escaping it, otherwise she could have stayed in here all day. She retrieved her tunic and headed to the bridge.

When she arrived in the briefing room the senior staff was there waiting. Some were making small talk while others occupied their free minutes with their data padds. As usual, Seven sat in one of the chairs facing the door and a flutter of nervousness shot through her veins as she walked to the head of the table. If only Seven had been seated with her back to the door then Janeway could have gotten by with only seeing the woman out of the corner of her eye. Instead, she got a full view glimpse and blushed immediately. Forcing herself to look at anything else in the room but Seven was going to be difficult, but if she was to survive this meeting she didn't have a choice. As luck would have it, she was careful to avert her eyes away from Seven's direction for most of the briefing, but when the Astrometrics report came she had no choice but to look at the woman.

Seven didn't flinch. She talked about various spatial abnormalities to avoid in the upcoming region, documented a medley of systems of interest, and detailed a nebula whose radiation levels were unusually high. All in all, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. She gave absolutely no indication anything unusual had happened. Was it possible that she wasn't aware of that kiss? Did she not hear the captain profess her love? As much as hurt filled her up that Seven wouldn't remember, Janeway felt a flood of relief. She was finally able to look the woman in the eyes and smile, assured that nothing had changed, that all that worrying was for nothing, and life was back to normal.

One by one the group left the room but Seven stayed behind for a minute.

"Captain, I must stress the importance that we avoid that nebula. I know it is your scientific curiosity to investigate as much as possible, but the readings I have gathered indicate Voyager would suffer sever structural damage if we get within five light years."

"You're probably right," Janeway noted, looking at the information on the padd Seven provided. "I think we can pass this one by. Good call."

Seven nodded and smiled but remained sitting in her chair, silent.

"Did you want to add something else?" Janeway asked while walking to the replicator.

"No," Seven replied, standing to leave and walking to the door as Janeway sipped her first coffee of the day. "I mean yes."

Curious, Janeway turned and waited for Seven to continue, gradually sipping from the steaming mug.

"I love you too," Seven confessed before abruptly leaving her in complete shock, causing her to spill her first coffee of the day down the front of her uniform.

Hours upon hours of social lessons helped Seven realize some things were better left unsaid. Somehow, Janeway didn't think this was one of those things, and deep down she was glad Seven didn't either.