The station was busy as usual. Merchants were docking, running around, and getting out again. Quark, like always, was swindling some tourists. Chief O'Brien was fixing some faulty replicators - as they were only replicating dead fish. Kira Nerys was being insulted by Kai Winn. Doctor Bashir was calling security on an over-zealous intern. Captain Benjamin Sisko and Jadzia Dax were going over a 1,000,000-page report on an unidentified subspace anomaly. In other words, it was a normal day on Deep Space Nine.

"I didn't know subspace anomaly reports were so long!" Sisko exclaimed. "I mean, the thing's only 5 meters wide, and we get a pile of paperwork 5,000 meters tall!"

"Well, you know Benjamin," the Trill replied. "Paperwork is our business. Why, when the first Trill laid eyes upon the stars, paperwork has only followed-"

"Very funny"

Dax smiled. They continued going over the report for about 5 hours, had a lunch break, and continued for 2 1/2 hours after that.

"Hmmm, hmmm" Jadzia hummed. "Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm, hmm, Hmmmm"

"Jadzia, what that you're humming?"

"Oh, it's just nothing." She replied. "Wait…I don't remember hearing it at all!"

"How does it go?"

"(Ahem.) Won't you take me to, Funky town?" she sang. "Won't you take me to…funky? "

"…" replied Sisko.

"Something like that…." She warily responded. "What's up Benjamin?"

"I think we need to do a scan for any singion particles."

"OK!"

"Errrruh!" the red alert klaxon sounded. "Errrruh! Errrruh!"

"Sounds like a red alert klaxon!" Jadzia jumped.

"Let's get to the bridge...I mean command center!"

--

"Captain!" Major Kira yelled. "We're getting a transmission from a Cardassian battleship-cruiser-thing.

"Patch them in." he commanded quietly.

"This is Weyoun. Ah!" he started. "How are you Captain? And how's Jake doing?"

"Jake's fine." He replied curtly. "But I don't have time to waste talking to you. Now. Get on with whatever you wanted to say"

"My, my, feeling unhappy today, are we?"

"Looking at your face makes me unhappy," Worf mumbled.

"What, did you say something? Weyoun asked. "Anyway; we called to tell you about our new secret weapon. We will use it to destroy your puny Federation. It's called the Singion Destroyer!"

"No!" Sisko cried.

"No!" Jadzia whimpered.

"NO!" Worf roared.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Luke Skywalker cried.

"Hey wait" Worf said. "You're in the wrong show!"

"Oh, sorry." Luke said as he flew away in his X-wing.

Narrator: Anyway, back to our story.

"No" Kira Nerys sighed.

"Yes" Weyoun finally inserted. "Now, you will sing…everything!"

"MOI-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAA!"