Author's Notes

This is my first fic that I'm comfortable with showing to the world so please don't rip me apart, I couldn't take it!

I am however completely open to positive or constructive feedback on how I can make my work better. So if you are thinking anything whatsoever while reading this (good or bad) please, please let me know! Afterall, it's the only way I'm going to get better.

Hope you all enjoy it!

^_^Kitty^_^

Chapter One

It was lunch time at Hogwarts.

Dumbledort stood flipping burgers, sending them through a hole in the wall, so Magarnigal could pass them out to the hungry students.

The hall was packed full as was usual for this time of day.

Draco had been separated from his groupies and sat surrounded by acquaintances. People he knew, but not the kind of people he would sit with out of choice. An empty seat sat to his right.

Maybe this is my chance to get to know him better. Lagoona had said only a few words to him in the past. "Hi, how are you?" was one of her most memorable conversations. She had always wanted to get to know him more. Not only was he pleasing on the eye, but this student was like a young Voldemore to her. She held Draco on a high pedestal, he was brave, fearless and was a leader that the Slytherins needed.

She took a deep breath and marched for the seat. As she reached the lone seat, from seemingly out of thin air, Crabbengoyle appeared. He put his hand on the back of the seat as if to move it so he could sit next to his would be lover. "Oi dumpling. That's my seat. Find somewhere else to park!"

Crabbengoyle looked stunned. Larger kids always ran out of words in the presence of beauty and this time was no different. Crabbengoyle tried to say something to redeem himself but only found words like "uh" and "wha".

Draco let out a roaring laugh. "Go on tubby, looks like the lady's got your number". He said in his trademark cocksure tone.

Crabbengoyle skulked away and Lagoona took her rightful place next to Draco. I should just tell him our secret. Maybe he already knows.? "Lagoon isn't it? Lagoona Umbridge, Dolores' daughter I believe?"

"That's me!" She said with a smile trying not to squeak or do anything to embarrass herself. I won't bother correcting him. Dolores may have raised me and given me my surname but she is most definitely not my mother.

Magarnigal walked over with a tray of burgers for house Slytherin. It seemed as if she threw them in front of Draco and Lagoona like they were starved dogs hoping for a bone. "I see Dumbledort's making the burgers again today. Or should I call them buggers, that's how he likes it".

Laughter erupted from around Draco but Magarnigal had better things to do that to punish Draco for hating on gays. Draco took a bite of the burger and the moment he had swallowed he stood up, waved his hand to Magarnigal and said in a powerful voice "I can deal with eating gherkins but by any chance could you hold the aids next time?"

Magarnigal left swiftly and returned to the kitchen with a look of hatred dripping across her face.

"Hold the aids, that's priceless" a voice chimed in.

"I thought so. So tell me Lagoona, is your hair coloured or is it naturally that white?"

"Wow, most people ask if my eyes are real. No one seems to believe burning green is actually a real colour."

"That didn't answer my question did it?"

"Sorry". Her words stumbled. "Yes It's naturally that white. My hair's natural, my eyes are natural and my boobs are natural, oh and I'm a size six. Anything else you'd like to know, Tiger?" She said with a half cocked smile, worthy of Draco himself, across her face. Wait did I just call him Tiger? Shit!

Draco smiled and continued to devour his aids burger. Alarah dishaher mahella. Lagoona cast a spell in her mind. She began to read Draco's mind for all of a few seconds. Umbridge or not, she does have an amazing rack. I could suck on them for days without coming up for air. I could use the as pillows. Sleep on them and have something to suck on.

Typical boy.

Although the thought that Draco Malfoy was thinking about her chest made her tingle and tense between her legs.

"I was wondering Lagoona, you're a pure blood. I'm a pure blood."

You're the best looking guy in the room and I'm the best looking girl in the room. She thought back to when she arrived at Hogwarts. She was a typical fat emo with no chest, braces and a joy of self harming. Years later she could not believe how good puberty had been to her.

"What are you doing late..."

Suddenly Dumbledort came thundering over to their table.

"'Scuse me, who ordered the burger with aids?" Dumbledort was known for his love of young boys and his hating of Slytherins. His temper remained unmatched. Other students feared Voldemore, but he was the Slytherin's true leader. An icon, a real celebrity. But who was it our parents told stories of when they were kids to scare them? If you don't eat all your greens the light wizard Dumbledort will feed you to his pet giant. Lagoona retold this tale to herself from her childhood.

"I ordered it Sir." Draco's tone had changed from confident to that of a small fearful child about to be hit.

"Here at Hogwarts, the Dumbledort Deluxe comes with French fries, lettuce, tomato, mayo … And Aids!" He stood tall and raised his voice to a boom "Do anyone got a problem wit dat?"

"Sir, I'm sorry, I was just joking. I wanted to show of in front of ..."

"Aww baby, it's too late for that! Ya see, faggots been breedin' your cows, raisin' your chickens, teachin' bitch ass kids long before I walked my sexy ass up in this mother fucker. Everythin' on your table got Aids." He grabbed Draco's burger and shoved it into his mouth, face would have been more accurate. "Eat it bitch! You come into my house, you're gonna eat the food the way I fuckin' make it! Do you get me?" His face was red like a flame.

"Yes Sir, sorry Sir". Draco's mumbled. His face was wet from the tears that had started streaming down them.

Dumbledort leant over Draco with one hand on the back of his chair. His other hand, which was jet black and stank of stale penis, grabbed Draco's manhood tightly. He moved his mouth to Draco's ear and whispered "See , all you gots to say is hold the Aids."

Yash brin ga stearin bul. Lagoona quickly entered Dumbledort's mind, she rushed past the thoughts of Draco crying naked on his bed as Dumbledort fastened his trousers up and as fast as she could, she left a thought. Go back and make more burgers. Draco doesn't anger you any more. Crabbengoyle looks better than Draco. Go now!

Dumbledort suddenly looked like a zombie. He was left with a blank stare across his face. But never the less, he let go of Draco and retired back to his kitchen.

"Are you ok Draco?"

"He, wha, I ..." Looks like all guys must talk like that when in the presence of beauty.

"It's ok my love. I'll protect you. You're safe now." Lagoona and Draco stared into each others eyes affectionately as she swept away the tears from his cheek with her hand. Did I just call him my love? Shit!

Lunch had ended in the usual Hogwarts abrupt style. It almost felt like it always ended with Draco crying and Dumbledort standing gloriously over his sobbing shell. The Griffindorts always looked on with admiration for him while the Slytherins always tried to burn a hole through him with their eyes. Sadly, it never worked.

Lagoona was one of the last to leave. She had calmed Draco before he left and that was all she cared about. Making him feel safe and secure was much more important than socialising and cleaning up. She left the hall swiftly, as she passed the big wooden gates that made up the door, she saw the Griffindorts that she would rather have avoided.

Standing there smugly like a pig in shit was Harry and Ron and Hermionekenobi.

Harry always had that look on his face.

He was the boy whose mother accidentally killed Voldemore,by chance at that. To his friends he was humble and kind. To his enemies he was a monster. He would always talk down to the pure bloods as if they were second rate wizards just because of the life they had been born into. He spoke as if he himself had vanquished the Dark Lord and worst of all, he would constantly brag about how good he was at things. He could conjure a Patronus, something that in itself, was an accomplishment, but so could Lagoona. The only difference being that she was modest about it.

Next was Ron. He was as dumb as he was ugly. His spotty face was hidden underneath his greasy, ginger, matted hair. He was Harry's lacky. He was there to make Harry feel good, to carry his books and maybe polish his cock when Harry was bored.

Lastly was Hermionekenobi, she was the biggest and most frigid bitch in the whole school. She would always boast about her grades and how much of a success she had became. People would listen to her, but no one really cared what she had to say. A few years ago she had punched Draco in full sight of his friends, just for having a different opinion to hers. And worst of all, she had the face of a middle aged man, complete with beard.

The three of them made up the most vile that Hogwarts had to offer and knowing they were brainwashed by the foul and biased Dumbledort left Lagoona feeling uneasy. As the three stood in the doorway that led to the front yard, Lagoona sunk her head as if not to be noticed. That effort was in vain however, Hermionekenobi came storming over to her.

"Oi! Listen up love" she said in her gruff cockney accent. "I saw you talking with that pure blood loving tosser, and, well, you're known to be a bit of a bright and breezy girl, ain't cha? And that ain't gonna fly round here."

"Who I talk with is none of your business." Lagoona's face turned from pale white to blood red.

"Oh, I think it is! You see I'm a forward thinker. I plan, a lot! And I'm thinking, if you two scrubbers end up getting' hitched, then that's three more "pudbloods" I gonna have to put an end to."

"I'm.." Lagoona words stumbled. "I'm not scared of you!"

Hermionekenobi smirked through her broken yellow, coffee stained teeth "Didn't say you were. Did I say anything like that Ron?" Ron turned and shook his head like a confused dog shaking fleas. "Ron's right. I didn't." The wretched witch edged ever closer to Lagoona, so close that she could not breath without their breasts touching.

"This is just some free advice, and I want you to know. If I do see you talking to him, walking with him or so much as look at him. I'll have your "jam tart" out and stick it on a plate and then I'm gonna Imperio you for just long enough so you've got time to watch me eat it. Do I make myself clear, babe?"

Lagoona could feel all of Hermionekenobi's ironing board body pressing up against her. Normally this kind of scenario would have left her a little wet, but she struggled to even find the words to say.

"I understand. May I go now?"

"May I go now, please?"

"Please."

Hermionekenobi moved a little to let Lagoona pass but before she could get a a few steps away, Hermionekenobi grabbed at her hair like a viscous dog then threw her to the floor. A sickening thud echoed throughout the hall as her head met the marble floor. Lagoona let out a hideous scream in pain.

Having said her piece, Hermionekenobi turned and walked away, laughing while Lagoona lay there with tears in her eyes and blood running from a hold in the back of her head. This isn't right! What gives them the right to treat people like this? How many times are they going to hurt me? I hate them so much! I wish they were all dead!

Lagoona sat up holding her head while blood dripped through her fingers. The world seemed like it was spinning at 100 miles per hour around her.

"Looks like our roles are reversed" a soft voice said while offering a hand. "This school would be a lot less cancerous without them here, don't you know?" Lagoona took the soft hand and pulled herself to her feet then lifted her head to say thanks when a smile crept over her face.

"Thank you Draco, you didn't have to come back to check on me."

"Of course I did! I couldn't leave a fellow Slytherin on the floor to suffer! Especially one as beautiful as you".

Lagoona stared into his eyes, her vision still a little blurred from Hermionekenobi's attack. You couldn't leave your sister either!