It had been 3 weeks. 3 weeks since they had been found out. 3 weeks since he'd last had any contact with his family. 3 weeks since Amira had begged, pleaded and screamed at him in the street. 3 of the longest weeks of Syed's life had passed by.
But he didn't regret what had happened. He didn't regret what he had done. His only regret was that his parents never gave him a chance to explain. It pained him to know that they were such a short distance away yet so far out of reach. His mother refused to talk to him. His father acted as though he was a stranger, as though he had never known him. His brother turned in the opposite direction whenever he saw him.
Eventually he'd given up. He had accepted that they didn't want him any more, they were ashamed of him. They couldn't stand the thought of him with a man so they'd cut him off. He was no longer their son or brother. To them he was no-one.
And so he had confined himself to the 4 walls of Christian's flat. Their flat. Here he was safe. Safe from all the gossip, the glares, the voices that fell silent whenever he walked passed. He stopped venturing outside and sought solace in these walls. And in his lover. Not only did it feel comfortable calling him that now, it felt right. All those times he had denied that what was between them was more than sex were laughable now. He couldn't live without this man in his life any more. Christian, who had also given up everything and more to be with him, still gave him the same feelings inside that had pulled Syed into him on their first night together. Now he knew that, after that night, there was no going back.
A simple glance at him was all it took to set Syed's heart racing, numb his mind of any thoughts apart from Christian and harden him like he never believed possible. It was more than just sex now. They didn't have sex any more. They made love. And it was more mind blowing than it had ever been before. Syed's guilt had faded almost instantly. The moment he had told his mother the truth, that he was in love with Christian, the weight of the world had lifted from his shoulders. He actually felt this lightness and knew instantly that it was the right decision.
But now, now that it was finally out for everyone to know, he embraced these feelings. He allowed himself to fall deeper and harder in love with him. He adored the insatiable feeling that filled his heart, he revelled in the comfort Christian gave him, and he never tired of the closeness he felt when they lay together.
More than anything it was the simple every day things he enjoyed the most. Waking up next to him without having to rush off back to his parents house. Eating at the same table as him. Shouting at him when he took too long in the shower in the morning, sitting next to him on the sofa, his arm draped over Syed's shoulders and Syed nestled into his chest. It was these everyday, menial things that made him realise that this was as close to perfection as anyone could get. They spent their days talking. Even though they had done this before their secret was out, now their conversations weren't focused on being caught, blackmail, arguments about when they would be able to be alone together next. Now their conversations were a mixture of pointless banter and deep confirmation of their love. Both as important as each other.
Syed turned over to see him lying next to him. Even asleep Christian emitted beauty. Syed could happily lay there all day and do nothing but stare at him. He, who Syed felt blessed to have been chosen by him, knew only a fraction of what Syed felt for him. He couldn't put into words what was happening in his heart, there were no words for it. But he knew Christian understood. And he knew he felt the same. Syed couldn't help but let out a sigh.
Chrsitian: 'What?'
Syed: 'I didn't know you were awake'
Christian: 'I'm not. I'm talking in my sleep again'
Syed: 'Very funny. We slept late again'
Christian opened his eyes and turned to face him. Already the stirring was prominent.
Christian: 'Well that's what you get when you keep me up all night.'
Syed: 'You weren't complaining at the time.'
Syed flashed his cheeky grin. The one he knew Christian couldn't resist. The one that made him run his fingers through his hair and pull him on top of him.
As if on cue, Christian's hand made it's way towards Syed's face. He traced his thumb over his full lips, began to gently stroke his face but couldn't resist any longer. Running his fingers through his thick locks he pulled Syed down to kiss him.
As their lips touched, that electric feeling that always occurred surged through them. Gasping from pleasure and desperate need for him Syed took his face in his hands and pulled him closer to him.
Christian: 'You are insatiable Sy'
Syed: 'And that's why you love me'
Chrsitian: 'That's not the only reason and you know it'
Syed playfully nibbled Christian's bottom lip and smiled as he let out a moan
Chrsitian: 'Stop it'
Syed: 'That's not what you were saying last night. In fact, I think your exact words were 'don't stop'
Christian: 'You're going to make me late'
Syed: 'What for?'
Christian's eyes sprung open. This wasn't how he planned on telling him
Syed: Christian, Late for what?'
Christian: 'Work. I'm going in to work'
Syed: 'In the café'
Christian: No, not the café'
Syed: 'You're not seriously telling me your going to the unit?!'
Christian: 'Sy, I saw Jane yesterday. She was telling me difficult it was now. They've got his big function of Bushra's tomorrow and not enough hands to get everything done.'
Syed pulled away from him and sat up, his back facing Christian.
Syed: 'I can't believe I'm hearing this.'
Christian: 'Sy, what's the big deal? I have to go back to work, we don't have a choice. It's been 3 weeks since either of us brought any money in. We've got bills to pay. I've already told Ian the rent's going to be late this month and he was fine with it. But what about next month? And the month after that. I need to go back to work.'
Syed: 'I'll get a job OK. You don't need to go back there.'
Syed shivered just at the thought of Christian and his mother in the same room as each other. He knew what she was like and he could barely imagine the horrendous and hurtful things she would say to him.
Christian sat up behind him and rested his head on Syed's shoulder.
Christian: 'Sy, please. I have to do this. You think I want to be stuck in a room with your mother all afternoon? Having to put up with her snide comments?'
Syed: 'It'll be more than just snide comments.'
Christian: 'What do you mean?'
Syed: 'You think she's going to just let you walk in there, pick up your apron and start chopping tomatoes without throwing at least a dozen insults your way?'
Christian: 'Sy'
Syed: 'And trust me, I know my mother. What she'll say will be nasty, really nasty. I don't want you to have to listen to that. You shouldn't have to listen to that'
Chrsitian: 'Is that all that's bothering you? Oh Sy, listen to me. I've met, handled and dealt with people with opinions like your mothers all my life. What she'll say will go in one ear and straight back out the other. It just bounces off me.'
Syed: 'You still shouldn't have to put up with it.'
Christian: 'I'd put up with anything for you. You know that'
He sat up properly and turned Syed's head around.
Christian: 'If I've got you I can take on the world and win. Just knowing your here for me, feeling the way you do. I can do anything as long as I've got that feeling inside me.'
Syed: 'I love you'
It was all he wanted to say. All that needed to be said could be summed up in those 3 little words.
Chrsitian: I love you Sy, you have no idea how much.'
He ran his fingers through Syed's hair again and smiled at the shudder he gave.
Christian: 'Please don't worry OK. I'll be fine'
Syed: 'You will ring me wont you. If she gets to much'
Christian: 'Of course I will;
Syed: 'Promise me'
Syed's eyes started to fill with tears. Christian held him in his arms and stroked his slender back
Christian: 'Hey, what's all this for?'
Syed: 'I'm sorry. It's just that, I've wanted this for so long, wanted you for so long. Now that I finally have you I'm so scared of loosing you, pushing you away. I'm terrified that you'll leave me.
Pulling away from him Christian's face was serious
Christina: Listen to me. I will NEVER leave you. Do you know how long I've waited to feel like this, to find you? Now I have I'm never letting you go. You're my soul mate Sy. I'm sorry but you're going to be stuck with me until we're old and grey, living in some home somewhere and feeding each other tinned fruit'
Syed laughed at the thought. He always did that. He always managed to cheer him up. Wiping his eyes he realised just how stupid he sounded.
Syed: 'So, what time do you have to be in by?'
Christian: '2. Why?'
Syed: 'Well, that means I get to have my wicked way with you for the next hour and 40 minutes'
Chhristian: 'Don't you ever get enough?'
Christian's face was smug. He already knew the answer.
Syed: 'I can never get enough of you'
Christian: 'Make love to me Syed. Make love to me the way only you can'
As their lips met the urgency in them took hold. This feeling when it was just the two of them was all that filled their minds. Syed didn't care about anything when they were together like this. Only Christian. They had each other and nothing or no one could ever come between them.
Until now.

Outside the flat a man stared up at the window, his eyes full of hate. He was waiting. He didn't care how long he had to wait, an eternity if he had to. He wasn't going to let this happen. He'd promised himself that no one would ever bring shame on his family again. No one. And now, because of them, that promise had been broken. Now they had to pay.