Rating: Teen
Spoilers: Right through to Breaking Dawn and beyond.
Disclaimer: Ms Meyers and her various book publishers and film production associates own all. I own my own imagination, poor grammar and very little else.
Summary: Leah spends some time with a previously unknown quantity and learns a little about herself and others.
Wolf Girls
'What's up with her?' Leah asks; baffled about why Emily would run out of her dress fitting in tears.
'This isn't as easy for her as you think Leah.' Kim responds quietly, still garbed in the pale lemon bridesmaid dress she'd been trying on.
'What's so difficult about trying on wedding meringues?' Leah demands, furious that anyone could seriously think this was hard for the girl who'd essentially stolen her happily ever after.
'You really think it's that easy to be an imprint?' the normally quiet girl responds angrily. 'If I was able, I'd follow the leech kid's example and break it too.'
'What could possibly be so damn hard about having a guy who adores you? Who hangs on your every word like you're the centre of the universe?' Leah scoffs bitterly.
'It's not all hearts and flowers Leah.' The small brunette sighs resignedly, rubbing at her eyes. For the first time since arriving at Emily's, Leah notices how drawn and tired Kim actually is.
'I've broken up with Jared three times since you left the pack you know.' she says, finally lifting her head to look the older girl in the eye.
'I didn't know that.' Leah admits, a little sad that she is so out of touch with her old pack mates, but mostly just stunned by what Kim has admitted.
The idea that Jared and Kim could possibly be having problems is difficult to wrap her head around. The plain girl had been half in love with Jared long before he'd imprinted on her. In her most uncharitable moments Leah thinks that Kim was probably the only one of them not directly affected by it that was actually grateful for the 'gift' of imprinting.
'Why?' she blurts before her brain can catch up with her mouth. 'He'd do anything for you.'
'Yeah; anything but the one thing I want him to do.' Kim replies quietly, so sad and worn looking that Leah truly feels bad for her.
'What is it you want him to do?' she queries, carefully.
'I want him to break the imprint.'
Leah shakes her head, unable to understand why the girl who had wanted Jared for so long would now be trying to leave him. 'What. Why.'
'I want him to want me without the imprint dictating it.'
Understanding begins to dawn for Leah. She's always thought that imprinting was something like a drug happy prison sentence for the wolf; she'd just never considered that it might be like that for their imprint too.
She's not sure what she should say now; so long out of female company has dulled her sympathy instinct and she was never great at it to start with. She was just lucky that she'd had someone as understanding as Emily as her best friend.
Her thoughts are drawn down the hall, where she is sure her cousin is still crying. It's an uncomfortable notion, and she turns from it back to the conversation.
'So how did he take the break up?' Leah asks, genuinely interested. Like most of her pack brothers (bar Paul), Jared is a nice guy and she feels for him that things have been going so badly.
'Not well.' The younger girl replies. 'He wouldn't accept it, and refused to back off. In the end I even tried going on a date with another guy.'
The female wolf winces, sure beyond a shadow of a doubt that that did not go down well. Wolves were easily as possessive as they were protective, as Leah's own odd imprint situation had recently taught her.
'I bet he took that well.' She snorts.
'He nearly phased in front of my date.' Kim grins back ruefully.
Leah's mouth falls open in shock. Aside from Jacob, Jared had been the pack member who'd coped with controlling his phasing the best.
Pretty laid back for a teenaged boy, he hadn't had that much of a temper to have to control to begin with. He'd had to have been seriously upset to almost phase in front of a civilian.
'Wow.'
'Yeah, Sam pretty much begged me to take Jared back after that. I also got a nice long lecture from the Elders about how lucky I was to be an imprint and how important it was to the tribe for us all to keep 'the secret' too.'
'So you can't leave him even if you don't love him?' Leah asks, horrified and astonished that the council would put so much pressure on an eighteen –year-old girl.
Kim smiles sadly at her and shakes her head, her waist length tresses slipping from her hair band and falling around her small frame. It's the first time Leah has seen her with it out of the braided bun she normally scrapes it into and she's green with envy. She'd love to grow her hair out that long.
'It's because I love him that I wish I could leave him Leah.' She explains sadly.
'I don't get it.'
She gets that Kim had wanted Jared to notice her before he imprinted on her; hell the girl had had a crush on him for forever, but she cannot truly understand why that would cause her to want to give him up now that she has him.
It's not like she can do anything about the imprint. Why not just go with it, she thinks. Then she is struck by the hypocrisy of her own thoughts considering how hard she has been fighting her own 'destined' relationship and decides not to voice them.
Kim sighs and stands up, pulling off the chiffon confection and yanks her jeans and shirt back on, surprising Leah with her lack of self-consciousness. She goes to the fridge and comes back with a bottle of soda for them each both before settling on the rug opposite Leah's seat on the sofa.
'He told me loved me for the first time after Sam and the Elders had explained the whole werewolf/imprint thing.' She confesses, gaze distant.
'He said that he was relieved that he could finally tell me everything and then he told me that he loved me.
All I could think was that our whole relationship was a lie; that he'd never have noticed me if he hadn't phased and I would still have been the mousy little nerd from his English class that Paul liked to tease.'
'He was so happy and I just felt sick with shame, humiliation and guilt. I mean what kind of loser sleeps with someone that is forced to be with them?
I went to straight the Elders the next morning and demanded to know how to break the imprint. I explained that I wanted Jared to be with me because he wanted to be, not because he was forced to be. I got a pat on the head like some slow witted kid and a patronising talk about the permanency of imprinting and how lucky I was for it to have happened to me.
I think I might have lost my mind if it hadn't been for Emily when it all came to light. Sam was horrified and furious that I could even think about breaking an imprint and Jared wouldn't let me out of his sight in case I tried to leave La Push.
The Elders had made it very clear that there would be consequences to speaking to anyone outside of the pack about pack business, and Emily was the only person in the pack that didn't think me wanting to break the bond was some sort of sacrilege.
In the end I gave in. Staying away from him was driving Jared crazy. He freaked out over any suggestion of either of us moving on in any way. He wasn't eating or sleeping and the kids were really missing him.
I still wish I could do it though, for both of our sakes, I go to bed with Jared every night wondering if he would ever have wanted me without the goddamn imprint Leah. At least with Sam and Jake you know that they wanted you without being forced to'
Kim stands up and sets down her drink down on the coffee table. Her eyes are shiny with unshed tears and her cheeks are stained crimson with embarrassment at having revealed so much. She turns away from the stunned Alpha female and follows the sound of Emily's tears down the hall, leaving Leah to her disturbed thoughts.
Leah actually feels kind of sick after listening to that. She knows that Sam loved her when they were together, and Jake clearly wanted her of his own accord before this stupid Alpha pair/mating bizarreness happened. It's hard to process the thought of never knowing whether they would have without something forcing their hand.
She can't imagine what it must be like to be in Kim's shoes and finds that she has developed a whole new respect for her.
The girl was so easily overlooked; bookish, shy and apparently content to be at the side of the older, better looking Jared Tala. It was easy to miss that Kim's smile didn't quite reach her eyes when she was so overshadowed by others.
Being kind of plain and quiet made it even easier to overlook the girl when she was always surrounded by huge, gorgeous men and Leah's beautiful, scarred cousin. Not to say that the girl didn't have her charms.
Kim's eyes always looked small behind her spectacles, but when she'd removed them during the dress fitting they were far prettier than the Alpha female had previously thought; big, dark and doe-like. And having just seen her strip off, she knows that the girl has a nicer body than her usually conservative clothes suggest.
The thoughts weird Leah out some, but being the only female in a pack full of boys, has made her used to seeing certain females from a different perspective. In most cases it's easily manageable and can provide fantastic teasing material.
She'd once spent two extremely entertaining weeks winding Jake up about Paul boffing his sister. But god alone knows she'd happily bleach her brain to get rid of the dream she'd once had (courtesy of her idiot Alpha), of kissing Bella bloody Swan.
The shift in perspective and her new found respect for his imprint make Leah decide that Jared is a damn lucky wolf. Sure, Kim is no Rosalie Hale, but she is attractive in her own unassuming way.
The girl is smart too. Smart enough to be two years younger than them but still have been in a lot of the same classes as Paul and Jared. If Sam's right and this imprinting thing is all about finding the best possible mate to pass on your DNA with, then she can definitely understand why fate would choose Kim for Jared.
Passing on your DNA means kids and Kim was already proving herself a more than capable mother to her younger siblings, despite her young years. There weren't many girls out there of her age that would have stepped up for their little brother and sister when their own mother had so willingly stepped down after her husband's death.
Poor Jared. As bad as Leah guesses the situation is for Kim, she can't imagine how difficult it must be for him. Being too young and dumb to see past the glasses and conservative clothes of the shy girl next to him in class to the young woman beneath it all had apparently caused him more heartache than Leah really wanted to think about.
The idea of being mated to someone who might never truly believe that you love them is just awful. Leah is comparing Kim's situation to the strange developments in her own pack when Jared enters the house, calling for his girl.
'Kim? You here babe?'
He spots Leah sitting on the sofa in her bridesmaid dress and rain boots and smiles in greeting. 'Hey Leah. Nice boots. You wearing them to the wedding?' he teases and lights up as he spots Kim slipping quietly out of Emily's bedroom.
He really is one of the best looking men she has met Leah muses as the back of Kim's hand carefully connects with his abs in admonishment. Leah flips him the finger at the same time and the two girls grin at one another in mutual mischief. Jared rolls his eyes at them both as he tugs his girl into his arms and kisses her temple.
'You ready to go babe?' he asks as Kim steps away a moment later and begins gathering her things.
'Yeah, just give me a minute.' She answers, shooting a significant glance Leah's way.
'I'll go start the truck. See you around Lee.' He replies.
Then he is gone, out into the daily Washington drizzle and she is alone with his mate once more.
'She misses you.' Kim begins without preamble, surprisingly direct for someone Leah had always thought so shy.
But then if today has taught Leah anything, it's that things aren't always as they appear. Her gaze narrows in place of a reply, not sure where Kim is going with this.
'God knows Leah if anyone got the short shrift from this imprinting thing it was you. But it hasn't been that great for the rest of us wolf girls either.'
'Rachael and I may be Emily's friends, but you're her sister in her heart. Honestly, I think you are the only one that can really help her with what she's going through right now.'
Not sure she should speak in case something nasty comes out on reflex; Leah merely inclines her head for Kim to continue.
'Emily may be the one marrying Sam but he truly loved you of his own free will long before he ever imprinted on her. Don't you think it's never crossed her mind that he'd still rather be with you if he had had a choice?'
The words are like a sucker punch in the gut and Leah suddenly finds it hard to breathe, but not for the reasons she thinks she should be upset. She thinks she should be furious at Kim for bringing up the idea that she and Sam could be together if he had a choice. Instead she finds that her pain is for the girl she truly has always loved as a sister.
Before she can get over the shock she is being hugged and Kim is whispering in her ear for her to go talk to Emily and asking her to say hi to Jacob. Not sure whether she should be more shocked by Kim's brave attempt at affection with someone as acerbic as her, or her knowledge of the unexpected developments between her and her dumb ass Alpha, she simply nods and carefully squeezes her back.
Then she numbly watches brave little Kimber Siletz step out of the house and into the waiting arms of her wolf. Leah smiles, mulling over how much she has learnt about her fellow wolf girl today and is amazed that the girl she had always thought so timid has such serious balls.
But then being the mate of a guy who's over six and a half feet, built like a tank and can turn into a giant wolf when upset would likely dull the fright reflex of even the most timid little mouse. Plus, Leah's seen inside Jared's head and even she would find him dominant and demanding, which is saying something considering how much of a pain in the ass her own mate has been since he found out about the baby. Kim had to be pretty damn strong to cope with that crap.
She hears movement from Emily's room and turns resolutely toward it. Her sister needs her. All of the drama and pain caused by the imprints, both Sam's and her own matter little in the face of that fact. It's time to face the future and let go of the all the rest.
It's about time she got her best friend back. Leah decides she's going to need someone less boy like around to help her deal with the sheer girlyness of being pregnant, and can't wait to see Emily's face when she admits to her that she managed to get knocked up by her idiot Alpha.
Besides, if no one else is going to do it Leah really needs to mock Em' about the god awful colour of her bridesmaids dresses. This club of theirs is small and they all need to play their part if they are to survive being wolf girls.
