A/N: Just a pointless angst oneshot of Sirius and Bella. Not exactly romance, just my point of view on their relationship. Rated T just in case. In this fic Bellatrix is five years older than Sirius. Please review, no flames please.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of its characters.

Summary: "Bellatrix is the Angel of Darkness and Sirius is the Angel of Light. He wants her, but she is forbidden, and he knows that even if their love was allowed, all he would be to her is a toy to play with when she is bored; a broken shell of a man to tease and torture." Oneshot, rated T to be safe.

Features: Sirius Black and Bellatrix Lestrange with a brief mention of Rodolphus Lestrange.


Bellatrix is the Angel of Darkness and Sirius is the Angel of Light. He wants her, but she is forbidden, and he knows that even if their love was allowed, all he would be to her is a toy to play with when she is bored; a broken shell of a man to tease and torture. Bellatrix is a vampire, sucking the souls from people, feeding from man's sorrows. She finds amusement in other people's grief. Sometimes Sirius thinks he can discover why that is, but after a long hour of pondering he tells himself that he is a fool for trying to outsmart the devil. Because that is exactly what Bellatrix is; a she-devil of the worst kind. A witch complete with trickery and suave persuasion.

Bellatrix is the dark side of the moon; she is midnight without the stars. There is only darkness. Sirius finds it ironic that he should think of her this way, because really, Bellatrix is exactly like the sky. She is wild and unpredictable. She storms when she is angry and makes it rain just for fun.

Sirius's feelings toward his cousin are complex. He hates her too much to think of her as family, and that's why it's alright that he's in love with her. She knows it, prides herself on it. On the rare occasions when a brief feeling of doubt passes through her, she simply reminds herself that Sirius loves her, and then she is strong again, because to have one's cousin in love with you must mean you are powerful indeed! She is the queen sitting high on her pedestal, loved and hated by everyone.

Sirius fantasizes that someday Bellatrix will be human again. She used to be. He remembers watching her comb out her dark, ebony tresses in fascination back when they were children. "You're beautiful, Bella," He would tell her, thinking of her long white neck, her alabaster skin, and her dark, glittering eyes. She would laugh and tousle his hair, and though he enjoyed their closeness, Sirius couldn't help feeling upset that Cousin Bellatrix thought of him as nothing more than her six year old cousin.

Bellatrix is hauntingly beautiful, so beautiful it's unnatural, and that intrigues him. Sirius witnessed all of her tears, all of her fears, and observed in horror as her heart began to harden. She found pleasure in others' pain, taunted them to relieve her own misery. It worked and though the misery began to lift as she became a Death Eater and was part of Voldemort's inner circle, as her parents became proud of her for the very first time, she didn't break the habit.

Sirius has never seen his cousin cry again. Whenever he saw her in the hallways at school she would be glowing with pride and haughtiness. He tried to talk to her a few times, but she always scowled and yelled, "Blood traitor!" at him, so he started watching her instead. He thinks she doesn't notice, but she does.

"Bella, you are just like the sky," Sirius tells her when they see each other at family reunions. He isn't welcome there, is forced to leave almost immediately, but just seeing her face for a few brief minutes is enough for the meanwhile.

"What beautiful poetry, Sirius my darling," She replies, her pretty red mouth twisting into a savage smirk. "Tell me; how long have you been imagining this moment inside your head, fantasizing of the day you could tell these words to the woman you love?" And when he finds no answer she laces her arm through Rodolphus Lestrange's and walks away, cackling shrilly. "And it's Bellatrix to you!" She shouts over her shoulder at him.

But when she's sure Sirius has left, Bellatrix secludes herself to a corner and thinks upon what her cousin said. Yes, she's like the sky. She blows ferocious winds at her enemies and loved ones alike. Sirius thinks that there is only darkness to her like most people. But that's because he doesn't catch the beautiful, kindly sunrise the sky begins the day with. Because though Bellatrix is a she-devil, a witch, and a vampire, she has her moments of tenderness. She quickly hides them when she thinks anybody has noticed, but that doesn't change the fact that somewhere, deep inside she has a heart. And though it is patched thoroughly, it is beating and very real.

So Sirius pretends he hates his cousin and Bellatrix does the same. But Bellatrix knows in her scarred, bruised heart that those moments of weakness, as she likes to call them, when the sun shines in the sky brightly, are when she is thinking of her six year old cousin telling her she is beautiful.

A/N: So? Did you like it or hate it? Input, please!

xox Sacha