Author's Note: I like to know beforehand the time era is for a fic, so when I write them myself, I like giving you a time because it's easier to imagine…so, for this fic, Tegan and Sara are teenagers. Let's go with about 16 or 17, alright?

Chapter One: Tie My Tourniquet

Tegan's POV

Sara and I share a very close relationship. As twins, we have a bond that not a lot of siblings have. I consider myself lucky to be able to spend so much time with my sister, privileged even. Okay, I know what you're thinking. No siblings like each other. Most siblings actually make it seem like they hate each other. Well, I guess that's how it should be between Sara and me, but, it's just not. Sara is always pleasant and nice to me. She's like that to everyone really. Sara is just a good person. I on the other hand, am moody, and I act like a bitch to everyone sometimes for no reason at all…everyone except Sara.

There's no point in trying to hide it from you, reader. I, Tegan Rain Quin (God, you know you're a child of the eighties when your middle name is, "Rain"), am in love with my sister. Well, I'm not sure if love is the word I should use. I mean, I love Sara, with all my heart, but I love her as a sister, I just seem to like her as more of a sister. I hope that makes sense. I'm sitting in Calculus class right now, and frankly, nothing makes sense to me.

I feel an itch on my arm, and before I think twice, I scratch my forearm roughly. Oh shit. I forgot about the cuts on my arm. My long nails tear open the fresh wounds from this morning, and soon I start to see the contrasting bright red of blood on my pale white skin. I pull my long sleeve over the bleeding cuts, and I raise my hand (my other hand…not the one with the blood).

After in insurmountable amount of time, my Calculus teacher finally acknowledges my swaying hand.

"Yes, Tegan? Do you have a question?" Mr. Kraft said.

"Yeah, may I use the restroom?" I ask.

"There are only 10 minutes left of the period. Can't you wait?" he asks. If I could wait then I wouldn't be asking, now would I?

"No, sir. I can't." I reply curtly.

He sighs in exasperation before saying, "Okay then. Just go then."

I hurry out the door with my backpack on one arm, and I rush to the girl's restroom. I push open the swinging door with my free hand, and I see that the room is vacant. Thank god.

I pull up my sleeve to my elbow, and I run cool water over my bloody wrist. Why did I have to scratch my fucking arm? Why couldn't I have cut my nails either? Thankfully, only the three fresh cuts broke open. Though all my other cuts are visible right now with my sleeve pulled up so far. Good thing the restroom was vacant.

Just as the thought enters my mind, I hear the door open. I yank my sleeve back down, and put my hands behind my back. I turn around to see that the girl who walked in was my sister.

"Hey, Tee. Why are you holding your hands behind your back?" Sara asks, her expression changing from normal to worried. Damn, she knows me so fucking well.

"No reason. I was just, uh, well um, I was-" I fumble over my words, and Sara walks over to me cautiously. She grabs my arms from behind me, and she slowly pushes my sleeves up. She gasps at the sight of all my cuts and scars, and she winces when she notices that I still have blood flowing out of three cuts.

"Tee…why did you-?Why didn't you tell me?" she asks. She stares into my eyes, and when I look up to stare into hers, I see that they're brimmed with tears.

"Sara, don't cry. I'm okay, I promise. This…cutting…it's just how I deal with things."

She wipes the tears from her eyes with her thumb, and she says, "Tegan, we are not done talking about this," she checks her watch, "because the period will be over in five minutes. But tonight we are going to have a long conversation about this." She nods down to my arms when she says the word 'this.'

"Oh, okay, Sasa." I respond weakly.

"But right now we need this bleeding to stop." She says. She grabs a paper towel, and she holds it there until the bell rings. By the time Sara removes her hand, the bleeding has stopped. I pull my sleeve back down again. Well Tegan, she knows that you cut, but she doesn't know why. You have until tonight to think of another reason you cut besides the fact that you feel unrequited towards your sister. You can handle this Tegan, you can…right?