She had never thought of what would happen after Will died. It was supposed to be a happily ever after story, was it not?
They had married, with the people they called family surrounding them. With their….best friend officiating the ceremony. Had built a home in the dwindling corridors, winding staircases and high-arching ceilings of the London Institute. Those same places that had seen them fall in love, conquer heartache, had went on to see them be happy, had witnessed the birth of their children.
They had both glossed over his mortality, in the haze of a life that could not have been more perfect. Her ability to see in Will the young boy she had fallen in love with, and know that the age in the wrinkles of his face were mirrored in her eyes and smile, had rendered her oblivious to the nearing possibility of his death. Besides, there were toddlers to raise, teenage crushes to obsess over and eventually overcome, then their were weddings to plan, grandchildren to dote on and so passed decades.
He was gone now. And she was on this earth without either of her soul mates by her side. "Most people are lucky to have even one great love in their life. You have found two." Woolsley Scott had told her. Her luck must have been exhausted by now then, for what good were two great loves if both were unreachable, only to be loved, remembered and ached for.
Then there were her children, their cousins, and all the grandchildren she had been blessed with, who were heartbroken and looked at her with a knowing look in their eyes. As if they knew that without Will Herondale and Jem Carstairs, she was barely a shell of her true person. As if they knew that without them she did not recognize a home.
That wasn't why she was leaving, the demise of her husband had broken her beyond what she cared to think about, but it had also brought to her attention the fact that the rest of her family was just as mortal as her husband.
She could not bear to see her sweet children pass away. Could not stand to see them suffer the wiles of old age. Outliving her husband was heart-breaking, but outliving her children and their children would..would…She did not know what it would do to her, but she knew she would not be able to bear it. So for quite a selfish reason she was fleeing the only home she had ever had, that had been built on truth. She hated that her children were losing both their parents in one stroke. but she would not waste away in front of their eyes and have the waste away in front of her own.
