Title: Being strong

You would think that having a scar on my forehead would have given me special privileges. Oh yeah, I get free stuff, lots of attention wherever I go, I get to be in books but that isn't the kind of stuff that I need to keep me happy. The thing that I'm talking about is friendship, or a little more than friendship…. love. I can't go up to a girl and say "I love you" and expect the person to say "I love you" back. What good is having all this fame when I can't use it to get the thing I really need?

I guess no one can to that. No one is that special, that famous. Everyone has to be careful who to give their heart to and make sure that the person doesn't break it and manipulate it. But how come the one person I want to give my heart to won't accept it?

Hermione. That name, to me, means perfection. She's beautiful, smart, funny, considerate and nice. Who can get any better than that? I noticed her during my fifth year at my school. We were best friends along with Ron Weasley. Together, we had lots of adventures, made lots of memories, helped each other with just about everything and loved each other. Not in the way I want it but a friendship love. We were known as the "Trio", never separated from each other.

Well, as I was saying, at first we were just best friends but at that age, 5th year, you start noticing certain things because your hormones are kicking in. For the first time in five years, I noticed how good Hermione was compared to all the other girls, how good of a wife she would make, how much I loved being around her.

I started making up these fantasies in my head about her. I would dream about our perfect marriage, our kids, what our house would look like. I knew that we were meant to be together and I knew that we would make a really good couple. I knew that our children would be beautiful; our house would be perfect and our marriage? Unfaltering. The only thing was, she didn't think the same way.

During our fifth year, someone else started to notice Hermione too. Someone was breaking into my territory, doing things that would break my fantasies. People were hitting on Hermione for years, after all, she's really good looking but there was something different about this person. He wasn't like the rest because Hermione was actually falling for him. She was returning the feelings that he was showing! Why couldn't I have her? It hit me. She didn't choose to like him, she didn't choose to love him, she didn't choose to fall for him so hard. Her heart chose that and you don't tell your heart what to choose. But why did it have to be Ron?

My two best friends. Together. Loving each other. It was supposed to be me with her. I was the one supposed to be extremely happy. I was the one after all who spent all day thinking of ways to make our future happy. But that was the thing. I thought about the future too much and not caring about what happened now. I look Hermione's love for granted.

I see all my mistakes too late. I want to break into their relationship for my happiness but I can't do that. I love them too much as friends, respect them as people, to do that. I guess this requires strength on my part. Strength to still be their friends, strength to hide my real feelings. I guess that's what being strong is all about, giving something up in hope that it'll be happier somewhere else.

A/N: Readers are probably thinking what the fuck was that!?? Well, it's not like any other typical fic out there. It doesn't come in chapters. It was a monologue for Harry, a soliloquy. He's just reflecting on what happens to him. Not like any other fic out there. Don't worry, I write regular stories too! R/R if you want~