"Why are we here again?"

Sonic tapped his foot impatiently, scratching his head. He was in a small cafe with his friend Ash, and they were waiting for a supposed old friend of Sonic's to show up. They were in the middle of a game of tennis when Tails informed them that Sonic had a mystery caller wanting to speak with him. Sonic took the call, expecting it to be yet another one of Eggman's schemes, but he was pleasantly surprised to hear a different voice: sure, it was a grating voice, but at least Eggman was laying off for now.

"If this 'old friend' of mine wasn't so late, we'd probably be out of here by now," Sonic mumbled. "I wonder who it could be?"

"And I wonder how they found you now," Ash agreed. "If it's been a long time, anyways."

They sat there a minute more, waiting for this friend of Sonic's. Finally, they were greeted by a voice.

"Hi, Sonic!"

Sonic's eyes widened, if that were even possible. "Oh no," he said, suddenly terrified. "No, it can't be!"

Ash turned and saw who Sonic was looking at. It was an orange, anthropomorphic cat, similar in stature to Sonic. He wore a white shirt with a red exclamation mark on it. "How ya doin', old pal?"

"No," Sonic said, terrified. "Not you! ANYONE BUT YOU!"

"Ha! Good to see you too, old pal!" the cat grinned as he came up to them, putting his arm around Sonic like they were buddies. Sonic never looked so uncomfortable as they walked away. "Boy, have I got stories to tell you!"

"No, wait!" Sonic cried. People began looking at him with strange expressions. Realizing he was making a scene, he backed away from the cat and tried to act normal. "Listen, Bubsy, it's not that I don't WANT to hang out with you...it's just that I can't!"

Bubsy blinked in surprise, then smiled. "Aw, shucks Sonic! Come on, whatcha got that's so important today?"

"Uh...I...um...I have a date! W-with Amy!" Sonic said quickly.

"Aw, sure," Bubsy smirked with that cheeky grin of his. Sonic hated that grin. "Come on, Sonnie. You and I both know that you wouldn't go out with that pink hedgehog if your life depended on it."

"Well...maybe not before...but...maybe I've changed my mind about her!"

"Sure," Bubsy grinned that grin, getting uncomfortably close to Sonic's face. "Come on, old pal. I've got lots of stories to share with ya!" He began dragging him out of the cafe. Ash, curious to see where this was going, followed them out.

"Hey, Sonic?" he called as they walked away. Sonic looked back at him, still in Bubsy's clutches. "You want me to come with you?"

"NO!" Sonic almost screamed. "Don't worry about me, Ash! Go! Save yourself! Fly, you fools! Don't ruin your life because of me!"

"Aw, for cryin' out loud, Sonnie," Bubsy chuckled. "Is a day with me really the worst thing in the world!"

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Sonic asked with a deadpan expression.

"Oh, give me a break," Bubsy laughed. "You make it sound awful."

Sonic's eyes widened. "Oh no," he shuddered.

"It's not like the world's gonna end, is it?"

"No, don't say it!"

"I mean, what could possibly go wrong?"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"


Nice going, Sonic Forces fans.