The Uchiha recipe of perfection.

Ingredients :

Ninja(Shinobi)- As many as you can gather. Suit yourself according to taste.

Kunoichi(Female Ninja)-About 1/3 of total Ninja.

Uchiha clan-About 50-100 spoonful of members.

Haggard old bastard unwilling to die- One. Madara Uchiha.

Rookie 12 of Konoha

Stoic Ice cube of an uchiha- One. Sasuke Uchiha.

A kunoichi with monstrous strength and temper- One. Sakura Haruno.

A knucklehead drooling over Ramen- One. Naruto Uzumaki

Method Of Preparation:

1. Stir the Uchiha clan and the Konoha elders in a bowl with Politics and plotting. Ignite with the will of fire till the mixture bubbles up.

2. Put exactly one prodigy in the mixture along with his small foolish little brother. Mix both in uchiha compound till the little one is envious and in love with the elder brother.

3. Bubble the prodigy with missions and orders from Hokage and Uchiha head till the prodigy murders the clan.

4. Have the little brother become cold hearted and frozen after the massacre of his family. Make him hell bent on getting power and revenge. Set the tasks in the oven to kill his brother and revive the clan. Pour generous amounts of sexiness and good looks along with the sharingan. Make the face stoic till necessary. Shove a huge log of wood up his ass as up as it can go.

5. Have the Ice cube reject his teammate of a kunoichi who declares an undying love and affection for him while she promises to aid him in his plans of killing his brother. Have Sasuke uchiha dump her ass on a fucking cold bench till the temperature is exactly minus 100. Make the Uchiha go for power to the Pedophile Snake Sannin who wishes to take him-in ways more than one-and grant him power using purple makeup and fake wings.

6. Make him kill the gay pedo before he deflowers the Uchiha. Take out the snake remnants to balance the flavor.

7. Make the two brothers meet again and let Sasuke Uchiha kill his own Brother, only to make him realize later that he killed the person who loved him the most.

8. Make the uchiha more stoic and bastardly till the texture is just about right. Let Sasuke-kun kill and kill and kill like a sick maniac to achieve a perfect scary image as a very dangerous S-ranked international criminal—much exactly what his brother feared him to be. Make the last Uchiha throw away his perverted sensei, knucklehead best friend, and the annoying kunoichi and the love that they have to give.

9. Drive the Uchiha obsessed with power, hatred, malice, revenge. Enhance the level to bastard.

10. Publish his image in the bingo book to achieve publicity and ANBU fangirls.

11. Let him aid in the fourth Shinobi war and be called as a war-hero until Chakra depletion.

12. Call him back to the place he called home. In a fresh bowl, add team seven—icha-icha fan, dobe, teme, emotionless Sai with a black blouse, and the annoying cherry blossom to konoha. Return his teenage hormones back to the last Uchiha and mould with a non-emo, non-hideous fashion style.

13. Ogle the female teammate till satisfied. Pull out the log of wood from Uchiha's ass and pull it out further till completely removed. Throw in a few Manners and gentleman-ish traits to go along.

14. Finally have the courage to admit and acknowledge your love for Haruno Sakura. Replace the Haruno part with Uchiha using tools like flowers, apologies, Roses, wedding bells, uninvited guests, ramen, a huge ass ring and most important—beingnice.

15. Move back to the Uchiha compound and claim your wealth, become stinking rich. Make the kunoichi happy—bang till exhausted and sleeping. Repeat process every night till Uchiha heirs start to pop.

16. Make sure little young Uchiha do not go for gay pedophiles in search of power and live happily. Marry your girl to the dobe's son after years or so.

17. Warning : Do not become a fucking hermit and leave the kid up to Sakura else the recipe will rot.

18. For best results, Live un-stoically ever after.