Name: Sassy

Rating: K

Title: Little Jude

Disclaimer: Not mine. Fosters is owned by ABC Family.

Summary: A very short one shot on Jude's feelings

Little Jude

Jude did hurt, inside and out. No matter what Callie tried to do to protect him; she couldn't protect him from everything. It was impossible. He was tired, too, of Callie always trying to fix everything for him. He was almost a teenager. He didn't feel like he'd ever really been a child. He'd been in foster care since he was 6. It's unlikely to be able to keep that sense of childhood innocence after your dad leaves you, your mom dies, and you get shuttled from house to house, person to person, with no one ever really wanting you. He didn't need Callie to protect him and keep him safe any more, he wished she would just start worrying about protecting herself. She'd been sent to juvie because of him. He could have taken the beating from their foster father. Callie had taken enough of them. But once again, she swooped in to save the day for Little Jude, and then she'd been sent off, and he'd been left alone in that house. Everything Callie did was for him and at times, it was suffocating. One more reason he could not be himself. She spent so much time making sure he'd be okay that he had to hide who he was from his own sister, the one person he knew would love him unconditionally, just because he didn't want to disappoint her.

He didn't need someone to shelter him. He may not be as hard as Callie was to the outside world, pretending like things didn't matter to him, like Callie did. He'd built a thick skin, though, over the years. He just chose to hope that things would get better. That's how he and Callie differed. She felt like the world was out to get them and Jude felt like he was going out to get the world. And sometimes, he was right about it, they did get better. Since he'd been at the Fosters, things had been better. He had started to feel comfortable here. Sometimes he even felt like he could be himself. Lena and Stef encouraged it. Mariana wanted him to be happy. Even Jesus and Brandon didn't seem to mind him asserting his personality a little bit. But Callie did. She was the last person who wanted to know who Jude really was. Callie still wanted him to hide who he was. She didn't want him to get too attached, too comfortable, too happy. He knew she meant it to help. She didn't want him to get hurt. But he did hurt. That would never go away. And hiding himself didn't make him hurt any less, it only made her worry less.

He was tired of everyone trying to protect him. Little Jude needs saving. Little Jude is behind in school and might never catch up. Little Jude doesn't know how to make friends. Little Jude likes to wear blue nail polish and that will get him beat up. It was always Little Jude in everyone else's mind. When would they see he wasn't Little Jude anymore? He'd grown, especially in the weeks he'd been with the Fosters. He could stand up for himself and he could be exactly who he was. He didn't need their protection anymore. He may only be 12, but he was far beyond his years.

When Connor wore blue nail polish the next day, Jude was glad. Finally, someone who didn't think he was just Little Jude. Connor showed he stood with him in a different way, not by taking over and fixing it for him. Connor hadn't intervened when the children started bullying him, but let him take care of it himself. He was there, and probably would have helped if Jude had needed it, but he let Jude take care of himself. Sure, the teachers had swooped in to help Little Jude, but Jude knew in that moment that he was stronger than he seemed. He wasn't Little Jude anymore. Now he just had to get everyone else to see that.