It started, all that time ago, back on Mercury Lighthouse.

Saturos, though weakened immensely by the star hovering just a short distance away, put up a very good fight. His Psynergy was still very strong, and Ivan specifically recalled having quite a few burns afterwards. But that wasn't what spurred anything on.

It was near the end of the fight, after a particularly strong Volcano knocked Ivan straight over. Saturos seized the opportunity, launching forward and aiming that scythe - gleaming so brilliantly in the most ominous ways - straight for Ivan's neck.

He could not move, paralyzed in fear, no matter how absurdly slow the time played out in that moment as he remembered it now. And he may very well have been dead after that point, too, had a sword not caught the scythe in its path just before it would have hit.

"Isaac!"

That's what he had said when he looked up from the sword that had saved his life - to see their blonde leader. When the Proxian stepped backwards, just a bit, Isaac shot a short glance behind him to quickly make certain Ivan wasn't hurt too badly, before casting a quick Spire to distract their opponent while Ivan scrambled to get up to his feet.

And that was over five years ago.

These days, Ivan would have been able to shoot Spark Plasma faster than Saturos could have ever hoped to swing that scythe. He spent most of his time training, and had done so for a long time now. He lived with Hama now, teaching a few young Jupiter Adepts in Contigo how to use their latent powers. Him and his sister were treated with incredible amounts of respect as well, and no matter how long Ivan lived there, he could not get used to it, and even now still responded modestly, much to the adoration of the local girls - though that had been more of a recent development since only then had he begun to look slightly closer to his actual age than before.

He also hadn't seen his friends from Vale in nearly four years.

He still wrote to Hammet and his wife occasionally, and he had stopped by to visit for a while before he left for Contigo initially. And Sheba came by once in a while, though, and she had grown up nicely. Though she also had the potential to be incredibly devious, and sometimes invoked that without warning, Ivan would have liked her, had it been not for the fact that he liked someone else entirely.

Since that day on Mercury Lighthouse five years ago, he hadn't cared about anyone else romantically.

"You should really go visit Isaac," Sheba casually commented virtually every time she visited. Of course she would know, she found it perfectly all right to Mind Read him at any time without being given any permission whatsoever.

Every time she said that comment about visiting... well, wherever the villagers from Vale rebuilt their village, Hama would nod in agreement. And even though Ivan would reply that Contigo needed him around, Sheba would tell him that was just an excuse. "You shouldn't be afraid of your feelings." He couldn't remember which of them had said that first, since they both tended to say things that meant that same thing very often.

But no matter what either of them said, Ivan never left. He knew somewhere deep down that he really was afraid. Even with his crush lasting all this long, what if Isaac never had felt anything similar? Probably never did - in Ivan's mind, Isaac was the hero everyone loved. Surely he had some kind of girlfriend by now. Or kids and a lovely wife. If that was the case, of course he'd be happy for Isaac.

But at the same time, he wasn't sure he would ever be able to let go of his feelings.

Ivan did not want to feel like this. If he had just fallen in love with Sheba things would be lovely, they'd have little Jupiter Adepts on the way, and a happy life. Maybe. But no, he had to find himself hopelessly crushing on a guy he hadn't seen in years that would most likely never return the feeling. It had been so long that he'd gotten used to it, hardly bothered by it anymore. And he was nearly content with it by now.

It was extremely obvious that everything would be turned on its head, then, when Hama recieved a visit from Isaac himself.

Ivan returned well after nightfall, having been out training the day away. He hadn't quite worn himself out, but he was still tired and ready to fall on the bed and sleep all the way until tomorrow afternoon. Not that he stayed tired, though, when he opened the door, Hama waved, Sheba yawned, and he noticed... one other person in the room.

Said person blinked and turned around to stare curiously. Ivan blinked and stared too, but he wasn't really curious about it. He was just trying to figure out if he wasn't dreaming. Because there was a certain blonde Venus Adept sitting there in the little circle of cushions.

"Hey, close the door or bugs will get in," Sheba said tiredly. Ivan realized the door was indeed still open and he was indeed standing in the open doorway.

Oops.

"Sorry," Ivan said, partially breaking his speechlessness while stepping inside and closing the door behind him. Though his hand still lingered on the doorknob, and he didn't actually move after that.

"How was training, Ivan?" Hama asked him kindly as always, but he also could guess she was breaking the silence before it even began.

"Decent," he replied and lifted his gaze away from the floor, not entirely sure why it fell there in the first place. He wasn't even sure why he was trying not to look at Isaac. Hadn't he been the one Ivan felt comfortable talking to about... well, everything?

Sheba snorted in response to Ivan's very short statement. "I swear, you are such a hermit. Get your butt over here."

"That's not fair," he said, rather weakly, and he wasn't entirely sure which part of Sheba's statement that was aimed at. Because calling him a hermit wasn't fair and neither was telling him to sit down near Isaac, who still watched him with the same expression, when he wasn't sure he wasn't going crazy from spending too much time by himself. He probably should be helping Hama out more with teaching the town's kids.

Not that he could really do anything about that now. What he could do, however, was go sit down and decide if he's losing it or not. It would be nice if he wasn't, but Ivan had no clue why Isaac would come visit him, and why alone, so he couldn't rule out insanity just yet.

So he did. He sat down and completed the circle of people sitting on cushions around the small fire pit, the only source of light in the house at the moment. Sheba must have made certain Ivan's little spot was open next to Isaac's.

"How have you been doing?" Isaac asked him, in just as much a courtesy statement as Hama's had been.

Ivan had stopped breathing momentarily when he heard the voice. Sheba cleared her throat after he had been silent for too long.

"I'm all right," he nodded and put on a smile, deciding to face his fears head-on, and he finally looked at Isaac. And he saw just how his former leader had changed in the past five years. Isaac smiled, too.

Ivan realized he had fallen into the staring trap again when Isaac looked away. So he looked away too. Though, he felt a little of his actual personality returning when he wondered what brought Isaac all the way out to Contigo. And Sheba read his mind again.

"Tell Ivan why you came to visit," she told Isaac, noticeably less tired. She probably was cooking up something in her head as to how to get Ivan to say how he felt. At least she had the decency not to tell Isaac herself.

"We've more or less decided to check on how the towns are doing since we lit the final lighthouse," Isaac nodded. "We've mostly rebuilt our town. So far, so good, even though a lot of towns have had to deal with some natural disasters as the world recovers."

"Yeah, I've noticed that, too. So how is Garet? And Mia?"

"Garet's fine, oblivious as ever, but he misses you too. I think he enjoyed having someone to bicker with occasionally, or at least, besides Jenna. Mia's still holding down the fort at Imil, though we haven't seen her in a while."

Ivan somehow managed the conversation with Isaac quite well, even though he hadn't had to hide his feelings from anyone for so long. He figured maybe it was just that life was coming back to him, and he wasn't being a semi-mute vegetable like Felix any longer. It was good that Sheba was content without reading his mind at that moment, because she probably would have disagreed that Felix was anything like a vegetable.

He still couldn't help but notice the topics were completely general. Nothing like how they used to talk at night when Ivan couldn't sleep, but then again Hama and Sheba were both there, too. He was ignoring his feelings for that reason as well, but he usually did that anyway.

Sheba ended up yawning again after Ivan heard about what Jenna and Felix and Piers were up to. "I think we should go to sleep," she chipped in, and Ivan also realized his body was beginning to feel worn out from the day's training. Not that it was a bad feeling, it was just that Sheba was right, and Isaac had only gotten to Contigo just before the world was dark again as well.

However, even when he crawled into his bed and his body felt exhausted, his mind was restless. Even though the easiest questions had been answered... one remained, the one he hadn't felt comfortable asking - why had Isaac come alone? If Garet missed him too, then why didn't he come along as well? And it wasn't exactly convincing that Isaac had so suddenly shown up just to check on things. As well as that, Ivan was not sure what he should be thinking, about, well, everything.

He somehow had gotten this little glimmer of hope that maybe there was another reason Isaac showed up. Maybe he had missed Ivan just as much as Ivan missed him. Maybe some kind of mutual feeling had developed somewhere along the line. But this couldn't be the case, could it? The rest of his mind was certain there was no way that could have happened.

... But when Isaac had described the situation with those he knew, there was no mention of him having any relationships, period. Combined with how he came to Contigo alone, that little spark of hope kept on bugging him. And it didn't help that the object of his affections was currently sleeping under the same roof.

He had no clue how long he laid there, trying to sleep and not being able to calm his mind enough to relax, and without relaxation he probably wouldn't get any sleep. And he got sick of trying to think about it at some point, giving up on sleep for now and deciding to go outside.

Not that going outside really helped, either. Almost unconsciously, Ivan started walking through the small town, away from his sister, away from nosy Sheba, and away from Isaac. He knew he was running away from his feelings again, but he was okay with that right now. And he kept walking for quite a while.

Somewhere along the line, he realized where he was going, but he was okay with that, too. He would be back before morning, and if he had to, he could survive without sleep just fine. The lighthouse hadn't moved all that far away even with Weyard remodeling itself, and with his going there often, he had the route memorized.

Even the trip from the bottom of the lighthouse to the top was fairly straightforward after having been there so many times. Just being around the lighthouse aerie with the large Jupiter Star hovering calmly within sight was enough to make Ivan feel calm, too. He could feel a little less uneasy now. To the point where he eventually laid down, even, despite how his bed was a lot more physically comfortable and he'd left that behind in favor of flat and rather cold tile. The stars really were beautiful from all the way on top of the lighthouse.

He also eventually shut his eyes, after his worries, questions and suspicions went quiet in his mind after enough stargazing. And there he laid, forgetting entirely about how he was going to be back by morning.

"Ivan... "

A hand nudged him, followed by a voice he'd recognize anywhere no matter how different it sounded from when they were younger. And it was nice to semi-wake up to a face he'd recognize anywhere no matter how different it looked from when they were younger.

"... Isaac? What are you doing all the way up here?"

Ivan's question was a little soft and sleepy-sounding, but of course he'd just been napping, so that was to be expected. He sat up slowly, and blinked a bit, trying to get his eyes focused again.

"I could ask you the same thing... But I think I know already. You couldn't sleep, could you?" he chuckled, just a little. His voice was soft as well, at least he respected Ivan's sleepiness. And that voice was calming too, as if Isaac's presence itself drove away Ivan's worries.

"Pretty much," was Ivan's reply, and he noticed Isaac still hadn't moved from his kneeling position right next to him. And Ivan could hear Isaac's breathing, along with another chuckle, from this close a distance, and it was a miracle he wasn't feeling edgy in the slightest because of that. He didn't move, either.

"I remember... when you couldn't sleep, you would always stare at the sky. I'm not surprised that hasn't changed."

"Yeah... " Ivan remembered that, too. And how sometimes, when Ivan got up to sit somewhere where he could look at the stars, Isaac followed him. And they would talk, about anything, about everything.

"I'm glad it hasn't."

"Me too."
That response was almost automatic. He wasn't sure he was thinking straight, because this is what he'd been secretly wishing for so long to have again, or maybe he was still a little sleepy.

Ivan didn't say anything after that for a little while. Isaac didn't, either. They were staring at the stars, and Ivan felt... just, happy.

"You know... there's another reason I came to Contigo." Isaac looked away from the sky, back to Ivan. He didn't move away, he just sat down. Just like old times. Ivan had missed this.

"Yeah? Why's that?" he asked, also looking away from the sky, to Isaac. He couldn't be sure which sight was better.

"I missed you."

It was simple enough, but it still meant the world to Ivan. That undying flame of hope had been right about one thing. He was glad that the hazy light of the Jupiter Star wasn't bright enough for Isaac to see the blush on his face as he looked away. He looked away from Isaac with a smile, too.

"I missed you too," Ivan replied, unable to keep the happiness out of his voice.

It should have been somewhat obvious that he shortly was enveloped in Isaac's arms with a warm hug, one that felt nice because it was a little cold on top of the lighthouse, but Ivan still hadn't expected it. He would never complain about that, though, he just laid his head on Isaac's shoulder. It made sense at first, and Isaac didn't seem to mind, but Ivan was a little curious as to why that didn't bother him. And he didn't move his head when he thought that, he just said the first semi-coherent thought that followed the previous one.

"There's another reason why I'm glad you're here... "

Isaac still didn't move. "Why's that?" he asked, parroting Ivan's earlier question to him in response.

"... I think I love you."

Ivan didn't really think after he said that. He just leaned against Isaac more. He was still a little tired, and the serenity of the moment was getting to him a bit.

Isaac chuckled one more time. "Don't worry... "

"Why not... ?"

A little confusing, but Ivan was too sleepy and happy to question it, and his eyes were still closed anyway.

"Because I love you too."

Ivan smiled again. It would have been a bigger smile, but he was really tired now, and Isaac was warm, and he was loved, and all was right with the world.


A/N

originally written for a request on LJ's Golden Sun kinkmeme. I am working on a continuation, but I don't expect it to be done for some time, if I manage to finish it at all, ahaha.