The night is alive and raging
It is a beautiful night in Godric's Hollow. The snow has settled down to a several inches above ankle-level, and the birds' conversations are loud and clear through the still winter night. It is as if lovers of the air have finally taken a stand against all nature, and all of nature has stopped in its authority to listen. The children of the neighbourhood are still playing outside, skating and making snowmen before the unpredictable thaw sets in. I can hear my brothers flying around the house with their friends, with our fathers chasing them around. I hear the merriment. I hear the joy. I hear the beauty of the solstice.
But I'm locked up in my room, tucked under covers. All my lights are switched off, all the windows and ventilation shafts closed and all of my belongings locked inside my trunk which is tied with ropes and hidden under the bed. I myself am hiding under several layers of sheets. I'm keeping my eyes tightly shut, with all the energy that I could muster, as if my very own life depends on it.
Maybe it does.
The night is divine and unforgiving
Since our return from Hogwarts for the Holiday two months ago, I would turn in around 6 PM every evening, and remain hidden in this exact position, irrespective of whether I actually sleep or not. I would not move, even if the house catches fire or if our entire family is being murdered. It's not that I did not love my family. I love my family more than my own life, even though sometimes I really do wish that James would just disappear. I would not be able to live without them. I could not…
But there are things in this world that are worse than dying or living beyond the passing of all that you love. There are things in this world that you could not get rid of or shake off even with the passing of this world to the next. Some torments in the world are so violent that it would haunt you and harvest on you for the rest of all eternity, with no hope of ever being released, not even with the kiss of Death.
Because, once you see it, you will never be able to un-see it.
And I have seen it.
The night is vengeful and awakening
The wind is blowing through the fruitless trees, making its branches shiver and caress each other, as if reminding them of their futility and fragility. They get closer to the window sill with each blow, bringing life closer to me. Its gentle caress against the sill is soft but it rings clearly in the mystic air. The curtains are awfully still, as if they are being held in place by a presence. The floorboards creek from time to time, as if the presence is moving across the room at leisure.
I do not see them. I don't have to. I feel it. I feel all of it. I'll never be at peace again.
I am Lily Luna Potter, and I've awaken the night.
I am Lily Luna Potter, I can never let her die.
I am Lily Luna Potter, the girl who survived the Veil.
Ginny sat at the foot of the stairs, her eyes tightly shut in fierce concentration. She was doing it again, as she had been doing throughout the holidays. She knew how wrong it was. Her entire physicality was raging against her mind's efforts, just as it had done the very first day, but she had no choice. There was no other way.
Her little girl was gone.
"That's quite unconventional you know"
Ginny gasped, getting to her feet, her heart clutched in both palms, startled by her husband's sudden appearance.
"How many times, Harry? Don't do that!"
Harry was about to make a crude joke but stopped, as he saw Ginny's bloodshot eyes. He pulled her into an airtight embrace, stroking her hair lightly and whispering into her ear.
"It'll be fine Gin. She's a tough girl, just like her Mother. She won't give up. Neither would we"
"Then why aren't you doing anything, Harry, Why?"
She knew it was unfair to blame Harry for any of this. If it wasn't for him, Lily would have been lost to the world. She knew how bad Harry was at this, but in her mind, if Harry couldn't do it, there was no one who could.
So she tried again.
"Please Harry. Just do it. Try at least. For me. For her. For all of us. We can't lost her. She's our baby, Harry, please… please…"
Harry hugged her tighter as her body broke into sobs. He closed his eyes in resignation, but stayed in that posture until Ginny's sobs ceased.
"All right. I'll do it."
Both Harry and Hermione dove out of the room, gasping for breath. Ginny and Ron sprang to their feet but didn't move towards them, as they emerged down the stairs.
"Did you see that?" Hermione asked Harry, looking delirious.
"Yes Hermione it was quite hard to miss" Harry looked equally mad, as if they had both been subjected to the Cruciatus curse over and over again.
"Oh for crying out loud, what the hell did you see? Was she there?" Ron blurted out, no longer able to contain himself.
Hermione looked at Ginny fearfully. She hadn't moved or said a word ever since they had sat on the stairs that evening. She only stared at Harry wide-eyed, with so much hope. Even when Hermione was beginning to talk, Ginny didn't flinch.
Hermione shifted her attention to Ron.
"She's in there, locked up in a corner"
Ron looked as if Hermione had thrown a spider in his face.
"If she's locked up, then… Then who's in control?"
It was Harry who answered.
"Lily. My mother"
Harry didn't fall asleep that night, and neither did Ginny. They lay side by side in bed, holding hands, until Ginny finally broke the silence.
"I want to see what you saw"
Harry knew exactly what she meant. Ginny had tried over weeks, but had failed. Her emotions always got in the way, and she was never able to get through the process. The only way in which she could do it now, was through him.
Harry didn't want her to see any of it, but he had no choice. She had to see it. She was, after all, her mother.
"All right" Harry replied, but he didn't make a move. So Ginny sat on the bed, taking her wand from the night stand beside the bed and pointed it at him with an unsteady hand. She didn't cry this time. In fact, she showed no emotion as she forcefully steadied her hand by grasping the wand with both hands.
Harry closed his eyes as he heard her get in position. He delved into the events of the evening as she whispered the spell, almost inaudibly.
"Legilimens"
Harry and Hermione walked into Lily's room as quietly as possible, closing the door behind them. Hermione didn't want to cast any spell to ensure that she stays asleep, in case they alert her or whoever is in control. As they reached her bed, Harry looked at Hermione and nodded in encouragement, as they both pointed their wands at Lily and whispered the spell together.
"Legilimens"
Harry felt a tugging sensation at his navel as everything around him disappeared, only to be replaced with a dark, old and withered forest.
And he was not alone.
Standing ten feet in front of her was a pale figure, draped in the darkness of the forest. The only part that was visible of the figure was the head.
A red head.
Harry gasped and started to panic as he realized who it was. His reaction drew the figure's attention, and the head began to lift, exposing the face.
A pale-white face with green eyes.
"Mom"
Harry heard himself whisper. His voice sounded alien and distant, and he had no control of it. He heard himself call at her over and over again, until his mom's vision focused on something behind him.
He turned in time to see Lily, his daughter, stop in her tracks as she saw her grandmother.
That's when realization hit him. Whoever is in control is showing him this memory of his daughter's.
Harry watched helplessly the events of the day he almost lost his daughter.
The day she walked into the Veil.
Lily turned to the figure in the distance. First, it was only the shadow of the figure in the dark, but it started walking towards the pool of light mere feet in front of it. Lily saw a red head emerge, along with a pale body. Lily looked it in the eye, and knew who it was.
"Grandma Lily?"
The figure only nodded in response. She stared at Lily in the eyes with so much intensity that it kept Lily rooted on the spot, staring back into her green eyes. Her skin started to prickle as a possibility occurred to her.
What does she not want me to see?
As if on cue, Lily felt figures surround her, making it dramatically obvious that she has nowhere to run. It was highly unnecessary as she was magnetized by her stare. Then all too soon and ridiculously quickly, the figures were gone.
And her feet were giving away under her.
She heard someone scream her name, and she felt arms around her, dragging her away. She could have sworn that there was a figure standing exactly where Grandma Lily was standing mere seconds before, a figure with rugged black hair and fiercely lit eyes.
And then she could have sworn that the figure had disappeared the same way Grandma Lily had done.
"Sirius!"
"Harry, snap out of it!"
"Sirius!"
"Harry you're going to wake her up!"
Harry felt the same tugging sensation as he was pulled back from Lily's mind. He looked at Hermione, terrified and yet thrilled. Hermione was trembling with fear.
Harry's face fell as he followed Hermione's train of thought.
I'm not alone.
