Move Forward
Chapter One: Caught in a Loop
A/N:
In case some of you haven't noticed, I went ahead and deleted Summer Camp from my account. I just didn't feel like dealing with the flame war that I unintentionally caused by giving a certain reviewer a serious case of butthurt by criticizing his rather ineffective method of reviewing. I won't give out any further details, since I feel like I should resolve this myself, without involving other people too much.
Anyway, this fic is meant to be a bit depressing. There won't be any action in the form of fighting, either, though that's to be expected from a story such as this.
I was recently told that I didn't think my stories through, which is the reason I have so many unfinished ones. I won't deny the truth in that statement. The way he put it was a bit offensive, from what I remember, but it still remained accurate.
As such, don't expect quick updates from me. Like, ever. With any of my stories. I'm just too absorbed in the heavy shit going on in real life right now to be able to publish as fast or as consistently as I did in the past.
Anyway, I hope that didn't kill your faith in me. I still plan on eventually updating some of my stories. Unfortunately, my profile is no longer a reliable source to find out what's abandoned and what's just on the backburner. I just don't think to update it very often at all, and when I do, I'm usually preoccupied with something more pressing.
Well, that's enough depressing stuff out of me. I'll let you read even more depressing stuff now!
"Yo, Kazuto-kun!"
I looked up from the sidewalk, casting my gaze to my left. I saw a man in his late twenties with crimson hair held up by a red headband, the front-left of which had diagonal yellow stripes from top to bottom. His stubble had grown considerably since the last time I saw him, making me wonder if it had really been that long since I had seen my old friends.
"What's up, Klein?" I found myself responding out of reflex, despite my rather foul mood. This man had the incredible ability to uplift my spirits, no matter how down I was.
But then, the fact that he was actually right in front of me actually registered in my brain. "Wait, scratch that— why are you even here?"
"I'm hurt!" he feigned hurt feelings, putting a hand over his eyes. "Can't a guy just come to visit his old bro for the holidays?"
I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck in an embarrassed fashion. Despite his feigned theatrics, I knew that he had no ulterior motives. Honestly, he just didn't have enough layers to think that way. "Sorry, man. Guess I'm just a bit on edge today."
"What happened?"
Of course you wouldn't remember. Well, I guess it's not really unreasonable of you, all things considered.
Outwardly, I merely sighed, pointing to a digital sign attached to a large building above us that I just noticed. It said the date in large, blazing letters.
"What does that have to do with any…?" he trailed off after realizing the significance of this day. December twenty-third. "Oh."
The very same day Asuna broke up with me, three years ago.
"Sorry…" he said, falling into step beside me as I resumed my trek through the streets of Tokyo. Oddly enough, there weren't that many people around. Well, I suppose that taking a walk when most people were either at work or school would decrease the pedestrian count… man… I really am off today.
"It was pretty insensitive of me to forget about that, huh?" I looked up after he said this, watching as he rubbed his neck nervously.
"Nah, don't worry about it," I replied, raising my hand to flick the side of his head. "She wasn't your girlfriend. And besides… we broke contact with the gang after she and I got together, so it's not like it would have had a significant impact on you anyway."
"I still feel kinda bad, though…" despite his aloofness, Klein really was a good friend. He felt for others even when he didn't need to.
"Well, if you want to make it up to me," I started, gaining a smile – however small it may have been – for the first time that day. "You can get me something to eat."
Of all the responses to get, I hadn't been expecting this one. "Well, I left my wallet back at the hotel. It's not too far from here, so we might as well just go there. Andrew's probably cooking something by now, anyway."
This perked my interest. "Wait, is the whole gang there?"
"Well, minus you and… her… yeah."
So everyone's there but me and Asuna? I guess it couldn't hurt to pay a visit… but…
I looked down at the ground, giving it a depressing stare. "You sure it's okay for me to go?"
I felt a hand on my shoulder, making me look up into the same kind, caring eyes that had saved me all those years ago. "Nobody in the gang has it in their knuckleheaded hearts to hold a grudge, you know that."
I found myself smiling. Not just a small one, but a real big smile, one that showed my earnest appreciation and gratitude. "Yeah… you know what? I think I'm in dire need of Andrew's awesome cooking right about now."
"That's the way!"
December 23
5:14 P.M.
Kirigaya Kazuto Residence
What should I bring over…?
A few minutes into our walk, Klein had informed me that they would be staying in their rather large hotel suite for several days before hitting the road again. In an effort to get me to reconnect with them before they left, he invited me to stay over with them for a few days.
And as such, I am now trying to figure out what to take over there… I concluded my mental summary of the past twenty minutes, sighing as I looked around in the sole bedroom of my mid-sized apartment. Klein was waiting for me in the kitchen, where he was most likely checking the contents of the fridge to make sure I had been eating properly.
Honestly, that man can be like a parent at times…
"Hey, Kazuto-kun!" he said from outside the door, making me wonder how long he had been there. "You packed yet? You don't need to bring a lot, you know!"
"Almost, man!" I replied, noticing the distinct lack of footsteps moving away from my door in response. He must have wanted to talk about something else, too. "You can come in if you want! I promise that you'll be able to walk freely without stepping on my stuff!"
I heard the sound of my bedroom door opening, quickly accompanied by the sight of his shadow moving with him into the rather dark room. "What the… hell?"
"What?" I looked over at him from my position in the middle of the room, then followed his stare. "Oh."
He was looking at the single crushed, empty beer can that I didn't bother to hide, since I didn't foresee anyone coming over in the immediate future.
"But you… made such a big deal about never wanting to drink…" he whispered, dumbfounded at my change of character.
"Everyone changes with time, man," I replied. When I received a rather angry stare, I sighed, deciding to explain to him my little habit. "I started a while ago, after one of my more… crushing breakups.
"After Asuna, I've never been able to hold a steady relationship. Pathetic, right?" I digressed for a second before sighing and continuing with my explanation. "Anyway, after I reached the legal drinking age a year or so back. That's around the time of the breakup that started my little drinking game.
"That first night, I got utterly wasted. The God-awful hangover that followed made me vow never to drink that much at once again. And yet, it also gave me an idea, crazy as it sounds."
I laughed in spite of myself before resuming my little story. "So, whenever I get broken up with, I always drink one can of beer for every month that we had been together. Luckily for my body, yet unluckily for me as a person…
"In the past two years since I became able to drink, the longest I've been able to hold a relationship is three months."
"Wow…" Klein sounded sympathetic. This was one of the few times when I actually didn't want him to be.
"Anyway, did you want to talk to me about something?" I decided to change the subject before the talk got even heavier. "You came up to the door, but didn't leave when I answered your first question."
"O-oh, right," he stuttered, realizing that the previous subject was to be abandoned for the time being. "I was just wondering if you still had your guitar and its effects boxes."
"Well, yeah," I replied, waving over to where I kept my stuff from my days traveling with the gang. Right by my bed, in the far corner of the room, a lone guitar case sat, along with a ratty, black, denim backpack. "Want me to bring 'em?"
"Sure, if you're okay with it," he answered, the tone of his voice suggesting that there was more to it than that.
"Right, then," I grabbed the backpack with my necessities in it, which I had just finished packing, and handed it to Klein. "You take that. It's full of the basics I'll need for staying over."
December 23
5:32 P.M.
Private Luxury Penthouse Suite
I stood at the entrance to the suite that contained my second family, which I had tactlessly abandoned years before for a girl that I ended up breaking up with anyway. It was torture to think about their reactions if I were to just walk in, and Klein could see my inner turmoil. Thankfully, he didn't act like he usually did and force me in.
I guess he knows I'm a bit unstable right now.
At long last, I decided that I couldn't just stand there any longer. I reached for the handle, stopping for a moment when Klein piped up from next to me.
"You sure you're ready? I can feel your unease, man."
I merely nodded, reaching my hand out all the way and grasping the handle with a slightly shaky hand. I slowly turned it, listening closely as the bolt started sliding back from the door frame. The door itself was unlocked, since you needed an access card just to get to this floor of the hotel.
The door slowly creaked open as I stuck my head through to check for people in the immediate area. I found none, sighing in relief before opening the door wide enough for both Klein and I to walk into the rather luxurious suite.
I took slow, timid steps through the front room. Despite my decision to stay with them for a while, I found myself incredibly nervous at the prospect of seeing everyone again. My stomach chose this time to start its gymnastics routine as the fear set in.
All of the sudden, I found a comforting hand on my shoulder. "It's gonna be okay, man."
I closed my eyes, taking a slow, measured breath. I was so close to freaking out and bolting, yet so close to breaking down and crying at the same time. I couldn't remember a single time in recent years I had been more unstable than this.
"Ryo? That you?" a familiar voice called Klein by an abbreviation of his original name. In no time at all, I saw the shadow of a person walking from around the corner that seemed to lead to a hallway. Almost on instinct, I tensed my muscles to bolt, loosening them once more once I felt the hand on my shoulder tighten its grip.
When the shadow's creator rounded the corner, I looked up at his face. His dark skin was clean-shaven, free from the small beard that once adorned it before I left. Everyone must have changed… well, I guess you can't stop the winds of time.
It took a moment for him to recognize me – after all, I last saw him at age seventeen, and I had much, much longer hair back then. But then, when he met my steel-gray eyes, now visible due to the shortness of my ebony bangs, a flicker of recognition registered in his own.
"Kirito?" the uttering of the name I took on when I first joined the gang at age thirteen really took me back. Back to happier times, when I didn't have to worry about the stress of adulthood.
I nodded my head slowly, putting a shaking hand up to rub the back of my neck. Almost immediately after, this dark-skinned giant smiled a kind of smile that I hadn't seen in years – the kind that only a fatherly man like him could produce.
His grin commanded me to curl my lips upward in return. I couldn't help it. He was the closest thing I ever had to a father, even if we shared no bonds of blood.
Somehow, he knew exactly what I wanted – no, needed to hear. He always did. "I don't know the circumstances, but…
"Welcome back."
I found tears making their way to my eyes at his words. Tears of joy, a kind I thought was all but extinct for me. My smile widened a fraction, and I raised a hand to wipe the liquid from my eyes before they fell.
"It's good to be back," was the only thing I could utter with my shaking voice.
Klein's hand left my shoulder, moving to give me a pat on the back. I responded by walking forward with slow steps until I found myself standing right in front of the man whose figure still towered over me, despite my growth in the years that had gone by.
Without any words, I gave my surrogate father a one-armed hug. The guitar case strapped to my back shifted a bit, making it a little uncomfortable on my shoulder blades, but I didn't care.
After all this time, I finally had my dad back.
His right hand reciprocated the gesture. I couldn't even begin to describe the surge of happiness that coursed through me now that I knew he didn't resent me for bailing on the gang all those years back.
I pulled back, finally composing myself once more. The smile on my face remained. I couldn't remember the last time I smiled so much in a single day.
"Well, I can imagine you're a bit hungry," he read me like an open book, as usual. "I'm almost finished cooking up dinner, so why don't you sit down and relax until I'm done?"
"All right," I complied, looking around the spacious suite for a spot to sit. I found a soft-looking, black leather couch over to my right, sitting across from a rather enormous flat-screen TV. In the middle of walking over to it, I paused, looking over to the man whose kindness saved me once again. "Thanks… for not being mad about me leaving, Andrew."
The dark-skinned man turned to me as he rounded the corner to where I presumed the kitchen was. He smiled his fatherly smile. "There's no way I could stay mad at one of my kids for very long. Never forget that."
With that, we turned away, with him walking to the kitchen, and me walking to the couch. As I sat down, I finally realized…
I never knew just how much I needed this.
5:46 P.M.
Klein had gone to someplace else in the suite, leaving me to sit alone on the couch and think. For the first time in several months, being alone didn't rouse any negative thoughts.
Before long, I heard the strumming of an electric guitar coming from somewhere in the suite. My eyes quickly traveled to my own guitar case, still sitting beside me, propped up against the couch along with my ratty black backpack, which contained my effect boxes.
They looked just as I had left them, confirming that Klein hadn't snuck away with them when I wasn't looking. Upon listening to the strums a bit more, I noted a slight tone difference from the sound my own made, as well as a slightly less rhythmic beat than what Klein was capable of.
What's going on? I wondered, standing up and beginning to follow the sound on instinct. It led me down a corridor opposite the one Andrew had walked through to get to where the kitchen most likely was. Confirming my suspicions, the sound of the strumming was slightly drowned out by the sound of something frying.
Paying my growling stomach little heed, I walked down the other corridor in search of the sound. As I walked, the strumming getting louder and louder with every step as I closed in, I couldn't help but notice that the suite was even larger than I had initially thought.
Then, I came across the door to a balcony. The drapes covered the windows, but I could tell that the strumming came from outside. I noticed a cord going from under the corner of the door leading outside, stopping at an electrical outlet where it was plugged in.
That must be for the effects box.
My curiosity was eating away at me by this point. I couldn't take it anymore; I had to find out exactly who was playing this electric guitar with relatively good skill. And so, I opened the door to the balcony.
The playing immediately stopped, and the head of the player snapped in my direction, magenta eyes open wide.
For a moment, we just stared at each other, eyes locked onto each other with equal shock registering in them. I soon found myself staring the owner of the captivating magenta eyes down, taking in her whole figure.
She seemed to be about a head shorter than me, though it was a bit hard to tell with her sitting like that. Lustrous violet hair framed her perfect face, the sides of her bangs falling just over her shoulders. The rest of her hair seemed to be waist-length, though it was still hard to tell with her still sitting.
She had a decent figure, from what I could tell with her guitar, which looked eerily similar to my own Gibson Les Paul, covering the majority of her sitting form. The only difference between our guitars was that hers was black with a violet finish that matched her hair, whereas mine was black with and indigo finish.
I decided it was time to stop doing what could easily be misunderstood as checking her out. I looked back up at her eyes, and I noticed that I was being looked at in a similar way to what I had been doing only a moment before.
When our eyes met once more, we both asked the same question in perfect sync.
"Who're you?"
A/N:
Because I decided not to let the bullshit that's been thrown at my face today (though it was technically yesterday now) get to me, this chapter was actually finished in a better time than usual for me.
I don't have much to say, really. I don't really want to ask for reviews right now, because I feel like I would be inviting a certain someone to just drop in and give me shit again if I did. I won't complain, but I'm not going to beg for them right now.
I'll let you go for now, I guess.
