Chandler comes in from a long, hard day of work

TOW FRIENDS AIN'T SO INNOCENT

First of all I would like to say that this fanfic was written purely in fun. Because I write something doesn't mean I support it. Also these characters aren't mine. I'm just borrowing them for a few seconds. Also if you are easily offended and don't like R' movies, you probably shouldn't read this.

Chandler comes in from a long, hard day of work. He's very tired and he can't wait to see

Monica. And all the stress, he just needed some good old' Geller lovin'. He walked in and

Monica is preparing dinner. "Hi Honey!" Monica says as Chandler walks behind her. He hugs

her tight from behind, pressing him against her. "Hey Sweetie." Chandler says as he kisses

her neck and lower ear. "Ohh honey," enjoying this, "Did you have a good day at work?"

"Umm, I couldn't stop thinking of you." Chandler replies, letting her know what he wants.

She turns and faces him. She wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him. They get

deeper and more involved with their kiss, both of them getting more and more turned on.

"Come on Chandler, let's go to the bedroom." Monica manages between kisses. Chandler

doesn't say anything, just lies Monica down taking off her shirt and kissing her neck and

collar bone. Monica takes his shirt off. Monica positions herself on top of him teasingly

and kisses him hard on the mouth. On the radio, we can hear Marvin Gaye singing "Let's

get it on." They both laugh inches from each other's faces and start to kiss again. They

break from the kiss for a second and Chandler simply smiles and rolls over so he is on top.

About 20 minutes later they both lay exhausted. Monica with her head on Chandler's chest

and her leg wrapped around him. "Damn. What a day." Chandler says tiredly. "Was it

stressful?" Monica asked. "Like you wouldn't believe. Do we have any beer?" Chandler asks

as Monica lets out a small laugh. "Beer, eh? You're starting to sound like Joey." They both

laugh. "Actually, I got a better idea." Chandler says smiling. He stands up naked pulling his

boxers back on. Then he puts on his simple white undershirt and helps Monica up. She puts

on what she was wearing before. As they usually do after one of them have a stressful

day, Chandler pulls out his bowl and lights it up. Sitting on the couch, he then passes it to

Monica who takes two hits and sits next to Chandler resting her head on his shoulder. "I

like your idea better. We haven't done this for like two months!" States Monica. "Has it

been that long?" Chandler asks as he laughs. They both continue to smoke until the bowl is

cashed. They set the bowl down on the table and lie down together on the couch completely

relaxed and feeling great. And then Joey walks in. "Hey guys. Ummmm, I love that smell.

You got anymore?" "My coat pocket." Chandler says as he flips the TV on to MTV. Joey

takes the score out of Chandler's pocket and put it into the bowl. "Now don't let Monica

smoke too much. She's got to make us dinner tonight." "Joey!" Monica says. "Don't worry

about it man. I'll finish dinner if nothing else." Chandler says. "No honey. That's nice but

I can make it in a few minutes." Monica says. "Sureeee" Chandler jokes as Joey lies back

in the recliner and lights up. The phone rings. "Awww man." Chandler says, not wanting to

move. He sits up and gets the phone. "Hello? (Pause) We're just chilling. (Pause) Fuck yeah

man. (He says as he laughs. Pause) Uh huh. (Pause) Sure. (Pause) OK see you in a few." He

hangs the phone up. "Who was that honey?" Monica asks. "Ross. He and Pheebs and Rach are

coming over. They want to get in on some of all the fun we're having." Chandler jokes. They

all sit there watching MTV. The new Eminem video pops up. The Real Slim Shady. "I love

this song." Joey laughs. The rest of the 3 friends come in all holding Coronas. "Now the

party's starting!" Says Chandler as he stands up putting his pants on and getting a beer

out of the fridge. Ross sits down on the floor and pulls out his bowl out of his jacket

pocket and lights it up. "Can I?" Asks Rachel. Ross hands it to her and Phoebe is smoking

her blunt. "I didn't know you smoked blunts Phoebe." Rachel says. "Rachel, I lived on the

streets for years. I've smoke it all." Phoebe says empirically. They all laugh. A few

minutes later they are all stoned off their asses. Laughing about everything and just

being silly. But they're just drinking now. To Monica, "Honey do you want me to finish

dinner, cause I'm hungry." "No that's ok Chandler. Let's just order some pizzas or

something." Monica says. "Sounds great to me. Everyone else?" Various yeahs, oks, and

whatevers. "Ok then. And while I'm up I might do a little cleaning, saymop the floor"

Chandler winks at Monica as he says this and she laughs. A little later, the pizza has come

and the floor has been mopped. Rachel is lying on the floor with Phoebe and Joey. Chandler

is sitting on the couch stroking Monica's hair whose head is in his lap and Ross is sitting

in the chair. Cans of beer are loaded up into one large trashcan bag and a bottle of

Seagrams Seven can be seen in the middle of the table. Monica's is really, really drunk as

well as Joey and Rachel. Phoebe and Ross are almost there but Chandler is just chilling

drinking slowly, not trying to get too drunk. "Chandler, I feel sick." "Ohh ok. Come on."

Chandler gets up and helps Monica up and she's really uneasy and almost falls. "Here you

go," Chandler says as he picks Monica up and carries her to the bathroom. In there he puts

her in front of the toilet and holds her hair back as she makes herself feel a lot better.

"You feel better now sweetie?" Chandler asks. "Uhhhg" "Ok, time for bed." Chandler says

as Monica replies, "Ok" "Ok." Chandler so cutely says in his soft little voice a la Matthew

Perry. He carries her outside of the bathroom, "Everyone say goodnight to Monica"

Chandler tells everyone. Various goodnights, sleep tights, and I'm right behind you's.

Chandler carries Monica and lays her on the bed but before he can stand back up fully she

pulls him on top of her. They start to kiss and take off their clothes.

A few mins. later:

Chandler re-enters the den to see everyone but Phoebe passed out. She's watching tv and

laughing at something she's watching. "Whatcha watching Pheebs?" "Oh nothing really just

"The Tom Green Show"." "Oh I love that show!" Says Chandler. They sit around and watch

tv until eventually Phoebe falls asleep. Chandler tiredly stands and cuts off the tv. The

gets a drink a water and sleepily walks into his room. Inside, Monica has thrown the

sheets around and they're basically all over the floor. Chandler picks the sheets up and

tucks Monica in before getting in himself. He leans over and kisses Monica on the

forehead and rolls over to go to sleep. The next morning Chandler wakes up to an empty

bed. He gets up and pulls on some boxers and his white tee. He walks into the living room

where Monica is, "Hey Sweetie," he says as he sits beside a miserable Monica and puts his

arm around her. "Hey honey." She mumbles. Chandler laughs and replies, "I bet you are

feeling wonderful this morning." "Oh I am" Chandler kisses her on her cheek and says as

he stands, "So what would you like for breakfast?" "Umm how about ten little white

Tylenol and a chaser of vodka." Chandler laughs and shakes his head knowingly. He takes

two Tylenol and a glass of water over to her and says, "Here's some Tylenol and water.

I'll fix you a Kaluha shake if you want. Those always make me feel better." Then Monica

says as she lies down: "Thanks honey. You're so sweet. Thank you for taking such good care

of me. Whew, from the feel of it, I drank a little to much last night." "No problem honey."

Chandler says as he kisses her forehead and sits at her feet rubbing her legs. Joey then

walks in and from the looks of it he isn't suffering at all from their fun last night. "Good

morning people." (All the friends' other than Monica and Chandler left early this morning.)

"Hey Joe." Chandler says speaking for both of them. Joey plops down in the recliner. "So

what are your plans for the day? It is Saturday so they will probably have a new act at

Central Perk." "I don't know about all that," Monica mumbles and Joey looks at her

strangely. "Hangover," Chandler fills a confused Joey in. "Ohh well if you're worried about

that then that BC Powder stuff really works!" (Note from the author: It really, really

does.) "You got any more for Monica?" Chandler asks. "Oh yeah" Joey says as he out a big

bag of little BC Powder packets. "Here you go. Pit it on your tongue and then wash it down

with some water." A few minutes later they are all at Central Perk drinking some coffee.

Monica and Chandler are sitting closely on the couch and Joey is at the other end of the

couch. They are waiting for the new act to come in. And in the door come none other than

Janice holding a guitar case. "Oh no!" Chandler says as he ducks himself and Monica.

"Don't say THAT is the new act?!?!" Joey says rather loudly. "Well hello. If it isn't the

peanut gang insert Janice's laugh here. And Chandler Bing, it's been a long time." Janice

says as she winks at him. Chandler wraps his arm around Monica's shoulders and pulls her

tightly towards him. "Uhh yeah it has Janice." "Sooooo, anyway, let me get on with my

music." Janice walks up to the microphone and introduces herself. Intrigued to see what

she sounds like Monica, Chandler, and Joey stay to listen in. Chandler kisses the top of

Monica's head assuringly. "Hello Central Perk. I'm Janice, insert laugh again And today

I'll be singing a very special song." She starts strumming her guitar and Monica and

Chandler look uneasy. "I want you to know, I had faith in you, I wish nothing but the best for you both,

Another version of me, is she perverted like me, will she go down on you in a theater,' "You remember

that Chandler?" (Chandler looks wide-mouthed to Janice and then looks at Monica like this

woman is crazy. Joey laughs and looks at Chandler. Joey seems to be enjoying this.) Does

she speak eloquently? And will she have your baby? I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother. Cause the

love that you gave that we made wasn't able to make it enough for you to be open wide, nooo, and every time

you speak her name does she know how you told me you'd hold me until you died, till you died, but you're still

alive! Chorus: And I'm here, to remind you, of the mess you left when you went away. It's not fair, to deny

me, of the cross I bear that you did to me. You, you, you, you, outta know. Did you forget about me Mr.

Duplicity I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner it was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced and

are you thinking of me when you fuck her! (Chandler and Monica look at each other and both

almost die laughing.) Cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able to make it enough for you to

be open wide, nooo, and every time you speak her name does she know how you told me you'd hold me until

you died, till you died, but you're still alive! Chorus Cause the joke that you made in the bed that was lame,

and I'm not gonna fade as soon as you close your eyes, and you know it, and every time I scratch my nails

down someone else's back I hope you feel it. Well can you feel it??!?! Chorus (2 Times)'" (Alanis

Morrisette, "You Outta Know")

Central Perk patrons kind-of look strangely at her but still clap. Janice comes and sits

down in the chair near the couch smiling at the three on the couch. "So what did you

think!?!" Janice asks smiling at the three. Joey's still laughing and Monica and Chandler

are too. Chandler finally speaks up, "Uhh it was nice Janice." He says sarcastically and

then continues laughing. "So you're with Monica now?" Chandler nods. Speaking to Monica,

Janice says, "He's a good fuck isn't he?" At this Joey roars louder into laughter and

Monica chuckles too. "Ok, ok that's enough Janice." Chandler says getting a little

Embarrassedas Janice says, "I mean come on Monica you know it's true. (To Chandler)

That's probably the only reason she's with you." Kinda laughing Chandler says, "I don't

think so Janice but if it makes you feel better to think that, go ahead." Chandler and

Monica get up to leave, Janice laughs, "See you two guys later!" "Hope not." Chandler says

under his breath. Outside of Central Perk Chandler and Monica are walking. "She's fucking

nuts!" Chandler says. "Oh trust me, I know." Monica replies. "But she's right you know?"

Chandler looks at her questionably. "You are a good fuck." She says jokingly. Right nearby

an old man looks at them shocked and they look at each other and start walking faster

laughing their heads off.