Disclaimer: I obviously do not own Death Note; its plot, characters, fantasticness or ideas and whatnot, although I so wish I did! :D
Also the quotes belong to St. Teresa.. But Cadence is MINE and the little arc ideas are things I have created.. rawr.
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"There are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers."
He came into our house again, "Daddy's back." I whisper to the dolly I hold tightly in my hands. She wears a little pink dress, with tiny black and green flowers printed all over her skirt. Daddy got it for me, the second time after he made me hurt. I grimace as I remember the pain, the broken skin, the bleeding, the shame. "I love you, don't you know that?" shouted and whispered at my back, my hair tangled and sweaty. I smelt of fear and his hands were covered in my hurt and blood. My mommy used to tell me that I should just be quieter around him, I should be nicer; he's under so much stress. But I can tell she's afraid of him, of leaving again and even of losing the man she once loved and cherished. Except he is dead, I listen to my own thoughts, they lack the innocence I'm sure girls of my age are just now supposed to be losing. I am no longer a child of 6, but am 15 and still carrying around this limp baby doll.
I hate the man I now call 'Father,' my 'Daddy' died long ago, with the first slap to my small face, the first flow of tears, blood and snot mixing together. He never hurt me before he lost his job, but I am pretty sure he hurt my mother lots and lots. This just makes me wonder, was there ever a man that truly loved her? Like she believes inside her own crazy mind? My mother thinks he has changed, this new man in her life brings her flowers and me sweets. He tells me to give him a hug, brings me book of pretty pictures, as if I cannot read; he doesn't even know my age. Doesn't realize I have been reading more advanced literature then he has since I was 6 and the school had placed me in an advanced learning program. I thank him, and realize that this man is my 'Daddy,' that is what I will call him while he acts the part of a loving father and husband, 'Father' will be reserved for when he shows his real, true colours. Of course, it isn't long before he becomes the man I still have nightmares about. Thankful he hasn't decided to take away my innocence, and simply uses me to beat out his frustrations, I thank the God that is out there. What a world I live in, when a girl must thank the heavens that her father simply beats her and doesn't rape her. I sob openly into my pillow as I hear him come up the front porch "Daddy's back." I whisper to the dolly I hold tightly in my hands. I look at her, she is soft and small, she fits into my hands easily and if one looks closely enough at her, you can even see speckles of my own blood, staining her delicate material body. "No, wait. Father's here." I hear him shout into the house, except it isn't really a shout. It's more like a gentle raising of the voice, it is too nice, it makes my heart start to pump faster, my hands begin to shake. I rise to my window and see the calm of my neighbourhood. I see the trees shaking in the wind, see the lonely road, empty except for several neighbourhood cars, a few garbage cans and that black van that has been watching our house for a couple weeks now. So obvious. I think to myself, of course my father would never think to question it, moron. I stop thinking about the van in question, and jump back into my bed, hoping and praying.
If there really is a God looking down upon my world, he would save me from this monster in father's clothing, in father's skin. I hear my mother leave her room, walking forward to meet the man she married and I can hear the forced happiness that she injects into her speech for him. She is afraid, so afraid of what he can do and what he has done. I know it, she knows it and he-he most defiantly know its, and has come to love the fear that he creates in his wife. He begins his favourite game of choice with my mother, I can hear the slick sound of his voice that he uses to sound all in-love and disappointed all at once, "Arlene, I ask you to be honest with me. To be a good wife and you, you come out sounding so, so full of shit." He growls out the last four words of his sentence, letting the slickness drop and the bile gather. He hates us, he hates us and probably despises himself worse for being here, but he has no where else to go. "I wish you were dead, Father. I wish you were gone forever and ever, Daddy." I pray out loud to the powers that be, my hands raised in a desperate gesture, "Take my father away. He hates us and we hate him. He hurts us and makes me bleed, makes mother cry. He has ruined our lives and always comes back for more when he tells us that he is going forever. I can't stand him. Please, someone. Take him away before he rapes me and kills my mother. Take him away!" I realize too late that my ranting monologue has been getting louder and louder as I find myself reaching some unknown breaking point. My mothers cries growing louder and louder as he yanks her hair back and smashes her into the wall. It will get worse before he goes to bed, dragging her almost lifeless body with him, to enjoy for the night.
Except tonight, it will be different. Tonight, he will hear my screams and will come into my room. Maybe tonight will be the night he kills me, the creature he maybe loathes the most, besides himself. I am his only child, a young and supposedly innocent creature, that carries his eyes and his old smile from when he was just a child. He comes tearing into my room, tripping over a pile of books I have out, he snarls at this and I find myself laughing. I cannot stop, I laugh hysterically. "I hate you, Daddy. I wish you were dead." I whisper out as my laughter dies on my tongue, my mother has crawled into my room as well and is sitting on the floor. Her tears can be seen mingling with blood in the reflection from a streetlight outside my window. My father is speechless, as if he cannot comprehend the words that came from his daughter's mouth. He begins shaking and it is strange how calm I am, how unworried I am that I will be hurt. "Judgement is coming for you, Father. I know it and I think you do too. You can feel the eyes of God watching you as you beat me, I know one day you will suffer worse then you have ever made us suffer." I continue to sound so sure, I stand up and feel my hands drop the last bit of who I once was, the doll leaves my hands and falls to the floor with a gentle padded noise. I am no longer so blind as my mother is. I no longer care what will happen to my body tonight, I have said what I needed to say and could see the fear flashing in the eyes of my father. It didn't disappear from his eyes, but his voice didn't betray it either as he spoke to me. "You little fucking bitch. You don't know what you're talking about. You think that God will punish me? He's going to punish you, because of the way you have treated me, because of how you make me so mad I can't help but hurt you. It is because of you that your mother gets hurt, you and your whiney cries and your fucked up head and life." I take these words in stride, I am not alone. I feel it, I feel him. "I am not alone, Dad. I know he is watching over me. The God of this new world, of His new world. Kira. Kira will get you. Because he is justice and he knows what you have been doing Daddy. I told him." The last of my words comes out in a harsh whisper, and I find myself laughing again.
I had posted my fathers name and photographs on every website I could think of, sending in his information to all Kira sites, telling my story over and over again, showing photos of my own bruises and my unique scars. How could her God forsake her when she gave him all the evidence? He wouldn't. She had faith. "Kira will save me, me and mother from you. You are disgusting, lower than fucking dirt. You are a criminal and you have no place in this world, in His world." There is a glint of something more in my eyes, I can feel it. It feels like craziness and happiness all merging together, I felt so alive. "KIRA! KIRA, I beg of you, pass judgement on the man here before me. He doesn't deserve to live in your world. If you do this, you will have me, completely. I am your follower now, but I will give myself to you, body mind and soul, please God. Save me." At the end of this plea to heaven, father looked at me and smirked. "I guess your God is a little busy right now, Cadence. But don't worry, Daddy's still here." He walked towards me slowly, I would not give into this man anymore. I would fight back more than I ever have before. I know God will save me, I heard his words on the television, heard the teachers in school talk about what a monster he is. Except I know, I know that there are some people in this world who should die, who must die. "No, he will save me. If not now, then someday he will kill you for all that you have done to me and to my mother." I sound so sure, it makes my father once more pause. I know he is weak, I know he is afraid of Kira, as he should be, he is a criminal after all. More and more, they are being punished, killed off because they have no right to live in His world. I am smiling as he takes the first shot at me, smacking my face hard enough to make me see spots. I am laughing as he pushes my mother off of him, her attempt to sway his anger towards her instead of me. I am still laughing hysterically as he rips my hair back and smashes my face again and again, making my left eyes almost completely swell up and my nose bleed uncontrollably. With every hit my laughter gets louder, mocking his attempts to silence me. I know God is watching, and maybe he is proud of me. Proud because I will not let this criminal kick me down and destroy my faith in a better world. "God, are you there?" I whisper into the oncoming darkness.
--
Eventually, I find myself regaining consciousness. My head is pounding so loudly, my lips are frozen with an unbreakable smile that is caked and stinging because of my own blood. I feel someone taking off my shirt and pyjama pants, feel dirty hands upon my body and know that he is about to commit the crime I always knew would be next. I open my eyes and see that my mother is lying in a large pool of blood, but is moving around still, meaning that she might pull through and survive. "You're a monster." I hear the words and know he can hear them too, he stops. His hands on my waist, the undershirt and underwear I'm wearing make me thankful it is such a cold night and that I thought to bundle up. He has a crazy glint in his eyes, "Do you know what I've done for this family? Risked my life just to bring home money so you can fucking eat and go to school and sit around and be a fucking little slut." He is acting like he is justified to do this to me, because he has brought home cash? And where did that last part come from? This monster was calling me names? Telling me how I've sinned? I find myself losing the battle to keep my mouth shut, I have to simply shut him up and I know how. "Oh, I know what you've done father," I hear my weak voice say, "I know about the crimes you've committed. Do you think Kira doesn't know either? I've listed them all. Every single rape, murder, theft. All of them. You think Kira would really bother if it was just a case of domestic abuse? He knows that you have contaminated more than just your family, the entire world has been further begrimed because of you and your partners. I even told him your real name. Steven Carlos Ramos." My father stopped and stared at me, his hands leaving my body finally. My heart began to slow down a bit, Maybe I could get out of this, keep myself from his disgusting touch.
I was terrified, to be honest. I was fucking beyond terrified, except I still had this well of calm deep in the centre of me, I knew that I wasn't at fault. I knew I was innocent, that I didn't deserve this. I knew it and it made me feel cleaner, even when sitting next to this trash. He was staring at me, his anger battling with his fear, each emotion promising to swallow him whole. "H-How-How do you k-know that stuff? Who told you?" His words give him away, he has always underestimated me. "I know because you're an idiot, I've been tracing your activities since I was old enough to surf the god-damn net. I even know how you've been double-crossing a few of your associates. I have to admit, you are even more retarded then you look." I push myself away from him as best as I can. "I'm not at all sorry to say I've been sending my evidence to a few of your friends. Actually, I did a lot of the sending just tonight, so maybe in a little while they will be here. If they aren't here already, that is." My father looked so angry at this moment I felt my heart start to beat again, a rush of adrenaline making its way through my veins, Oh fuck, I don't want to die. Fuck, fuck. What can I do? A sudden idea made Cadence's eyes light up with unexpected brilliance, of course. "I can't believe you didn't notice the fucking van outside the house, just down the block a bit. The surveillance van, it's been monitoring you and this house, you asshole. They know what you've been doing and they are royally pissed." He looked towards the window and then back at me, deciding if he should believe me or not. "God, just go check for yourself then."
I quickly pulled on my pj pants while he was standing at the window, and found myself being able to examine my mothers wounds. He slender face was almost unrecognizable, covered in so much blood and bruises. Her head was still bleeding severely, but I was able to stop it by using a piece of my sheets to tie it off. I could hear a low stream of curses being spat out in spanish coming from my father, his hands grasping at his head in a scene of pure insanity. I've won, Daddy. I cradled my mothers head and lightly kissed a bit of her forehead, mixing the blood from my mouth with the blood drying in her hair. I could only taste the metal of our mingled blood, our tainted innocence and utter unhappiness and desperation at this awful situation we found ourselves in. I noticed how pale my mothers skin was, how she seemed so much colder then she should be and I found myself crying over her wounds. "Mommy, don't die." I whispered into her ear, She can't die, no one loves me except her. She can't die. She can't.
I hear my father leaving the house, through the back door. Attempting to run and not get caught by the men he imagined himself being chased by. What he didn't know is that this van was not filled with his criminal buddies, like she had led on, but most likely by the police. The police were of a great disappointment to Cadence, she had tried on many occasions to get free and be able to get help from them. But it usually ended in disappointment and worse beatings, they had led her father to her mother and Cadence whenever they attempted to get away. Usually by "accident," but once on purpose. Claiming that it was his right to see his daughter even if his wife, Arlene, was leaving him and wanted a divorce. Of course, her father always behaved so gentlemanly-like in front of others, it was almost hard not to believe in him herself. Except she knew the real man, and he was nothing but a monster.
The minute after the monster had escaped she heard him screaming and attempting to get free from those who had caught him. "It is coming Daddy, the police have you now. But real justice will be here soon enough." Probably isn't the police though, they are incapable. I wonder who then? Some other crime unit? Who cares, right now. We're alive! She grinned into her mothers hair, whispering into the woman's ear. "Mommy, I love you. Kira will keep us safe from now on. Kira will free us, Kira will make this world liveable. And we'll never be scared again, okay?" She listened for the men to enter her house, to bring in the medics to save her mother and her and get statements. She already knew this dance, she was simply waiting for the music to begin.
***
"God aids the valiant...both to you and to me He will give the help needed."
Light and L sat beside the large wall of television screens, watching the awful scene playing before their eyes. The young girl, Cadence, had been punched so much by her father. Her blood was causing her to choke and Light could almost taste the iron this far away. His hands were getting perverse as they began to undress the young girl while she zoned in and out of being. "Ryuzaki, we have to stop this. Aren't you going to send someone in?" Glancing down at the strange man beside him, his legs drawn up close to his chest, his thumb resting lightly on his lips. "Yes, it would be terrible for this girl to be hurt anymore by her father. I will send in a team at once and hope that they are able to get there in time." Light shuddered at the thought, wishing he could be in that surveillance van, and could just run in a save the little girl and her mother from harms way. Ryuzaki turned his large eyes up to the pacing suspect, the chain that linked the two clinking softly at the furious movements the younger was making. "That man, is truly disgusting. Did you see him? He doesn't care about anyone, I know that. But his own daughter?" He thought of his own little sister then, Sayu, who was around the same age as this girl and felt his face losing all of its colour. Ryuzaki noticed the difference and did a small double-take, lately Light-kun felt so much more human than a supposed God. And the way he was behaving now, it was almost heartbreaking the emotion in his voice, the protective stance he took when thinking about the harm this child was about to come to.
"Five percent, Light-kun." Ryuzaki spoke in his usual monotone voice, hoping to keep Light's mind off of this young girl's peril, knowing nothing they could do would speed up the police team headed to the address as they spoke. Light paused at the words, then turned around and struck the older detective in the face, "Do you think I care what you think right now, Ryuzaki? While this young girl is being killed by her father, molested? Do you think I give a damn if you think I'm Kira right now?!" L stood up and rubbed his cheek, "Ow, perhaps. And I meant that Light-kun has lessened his percentage by five percent, because of the concern he is showing for another person. I only meant to keep Light-kun's mind from this while the team got there, I too care about what happens to this girl." L stopped speaking, realizing he hadn't spoken so much in the past few hours and would probably continue speaking if only to keep Light-kun from acting up anymore. Odd, that I should care how Kira feels. Except, I care about you Light-kun and you don't seem to be Kira right now.
After a moment of silence, Light put down his striking hand and apologized? "I'm sorry, Ryuzaki. For hitting you like that, I just can't stand not being able to help that poor girl. She seems so strong and intelligent, even if her ideals are a little on the Kira-side." Ryuzaki couldn't help but admire Light's fabulous acting job, Is that why he cares? One of his followers is in danger, a worshipper of Kira? No- she is nothing to him, not even a pawn in his game. Then why, why would he care and why do I actually believe he does care for her? L felt his chained partner walk back to the monitors, sitting down and making a sound of disbelief. "Look, she has stopped him and has managed to get him to runaway, but her mother is much more injured then we first believed. I'm going to radio for an ambulance to pick her up, she has lost too much blood. I hope she makes it. Ryuzaki, the team will apprehend him, right? They have to, he must be brought to justice!" Ryuzaki stared at the bright eyed boy beside of him, Light-kun seems to full of justice, so positive. Not at all Kira, what has happened to you, Yagami-kun? L questioned in his own mind, nodding and agreeing that this criminal will be brought to justice And just whose justice did you have in mind, Kira?
***
I picked up the doll out of habit, not knowing what to do with my hands without it. My mother had created the dress that covered the old toys body, my father bought the damn thing with his blood money and made me give him a hug in return for it. Of course, I still loved him then, didn't I? Cadence was sitting in the back of an ambulance, an attendant was cleaning her wounds, stitching up her lip and making sure she didn't have any hidden injuries. Her mother was lying down on a stretcher, her face was looking a bit stronger now that her wounds had been properly taken care of. Cadence found herself numbing out considerably, her shaking hands were the only things that gave her real feeling away. "Is she.. Is she going to li-be okay?" I asked with my dry voice, the attendant smiled at me and passed me an unopened bottle of water. He pulled the lid off and I found myself drinking the entire bottle in a few long gulps. "Arlene's going to make it, she's strong. And I think you're to thank in this miracle." My eyes widened at the words, I am to thank? What? The attendant must have noticed the look and explained quicky. "You're mother was losing so much blood, I'm afraid any more and she might not have had a chance. You saved her life. You and your excellent bandaging skills." He smiled and offered me another blanket to wrap around my chilled body, I took it gratefully. "Well, just call me Doctor of the Church." I laughed but the attendant didn't get it, so I went on to say "You get used to it, you have to get good at bandaging or else things get infected and never heal right." I felt myself saying to the man, who looked a lot paler when he understood the meaning of these words. I felt a pair of hands pulling the blanket closer around my body and lightly grasping the hand that was holding the pathetic little doll. "I don't know what happened in there, Cadence. But I know you saved your mother's life. And I know that he can't hurt you anymore, you're safe now, okay?" He's so nice, why couldn't he have been my father instead? He would never hit me, he has nice hands. I felt tears sliding down my face, burning at the cuts that had been freshly cleaned minutes ago. "Thank you." I whispered out, not sure if he could hear me. I suddenly felt too tired to keep my eyes open and found myself falling into an oblivion of darkness.
--
"Prayer is nothing else than being on terms of friendship with God."
When I opened my eyes again I found myself staring into the eyes of an angel, No, not an angel. But God.. "God, is that you?" I whispered to the form that was watching me with such kind eyes, He has the eyes of someone who cares. Beside my God was an older man with dark eyes, with strange bags under them and he was sitting in a weird way. He was sucking lightly at a thumb and watching the exchange between us. "Light-kun, I believe the child is addressing you." Light? What a perfect name. "Are you Kira, Light?" I asked in a small voice, causing the man I was looking at to flinch and stumble back a bit. Could I be wrong? He feels like God. "No, I'm not Kira. My name is Light and this is Ryuzaki." He held out his hand to shake hers, and then she shook the strange boys hand. He was holding a large bowl of jello in his lap, in fact, it looked like a large salad bowl. It was ridiculous, the jello inside of it was green, blue and red and had a huge pile of whipped cream and strawberries on it. "Did you eat all the jello in the hospital, or what?!" I asked with a small smile, This guy is so weird! Light laughed at the expression on my face and the way that Ryuzaki froze with a giant spoonful of jello on his way to his mouth. I laughed once I realized how bizarre the whole situation was. "Okay, so just who are you two and why are you here eating all of the jello in the world, when I am the one who should be eating it?" I asked with a teasing look, reaching a spoon out to steal a piece of red jello from Ryuzaki's bowl. The room got suddenly quiet as I placed the Jello in my mouth, the two boys in front of me realized I actually just stole a piece of jello from Ryuzaki and was not quaking with fear.
Once again Light broke out into laughter, this time it was louder and by the end of the laugh all three of us had joined in. It was truly the weirdest situation of my life, but probably one of the happiest. "I cannot believe you just dared to take a piece of Ryuzaki's desert! He would've probably destroyed me for even thinking about it!" Light laughed a bit more, and I found myself enjoying the company of these two strange men. They had a weird relationship, but they were close. Far closer than they probably even realized and it brought a bit of hope to my heart.
I wished I could be close to someone, have a real friend. Ryuzaki noticed my expression starting to get sad and thoughtful, and so he seemed to nod once to himself, almost as if preparing himself for a great loss. Then he proceeded to shove a huge spoonful into Light's slightly open mouth, the goal of this was, of course, to make me laugh. Which he totally succeeded in doing. Light made the most sour face I have ever seen on someone's face before, his expression priceless and I found myself gigging hysterically. He let the vile dessert be consumed and wiped away any evidence, checking his perfect clothes to make sure none of it had contaminated him any more. "Well, Light-kun, all you had to do was ask and I might've even shared with you." Ryuzaki quipped at the disgusted looking boy. I laughed harder at the facial response this comment produced.
During this laugh, I felt my lip split open and could feel the warm oozing of blood as it dripped down my face. I laughed a bit more at this feeling, the laughter starting to get a bit hysterical, tears starting to flood down my face. I felt my hands shaking, my heart speeding up, the blood, oh god, the BLOOD. I gagged at the smell, it made me think of him. Of that awful man whom I called father and his disgusting hands on my waist. I looked up and felt a pair of hands on my shoulders, it was Light. He was calling out my name softly, shaking me a bit, and then pulling my face gently to his chest. I paused and sniffled, "Your shirt, it's going to be ruined." Light laughed a bit softly, and patted my head where I wasn't bruised and aching. "What makes you think I care about some stupid shirt?" Now she was the one lightly laughing, she lightly pulled back and wiped the blood off of her face with a near-by napkin. "I can tell just by looking at you, clothes matter. It's all about the appearances and the representation. But even with the blood, you still look like an angel, Light." I stopped and blushed a bit, realizing I had just met this boy and was talking like a weirdo. Ryuzaki was watching me with his bottomless eyes, seemingly reassessing his previous thoughts on me. He put down the half-finished bowl of sweets and brought his thumb back up to his mouth, his bare feet wiggling as he thought. "That is a correct assumption about Light-kun, he is very aware of appearances and often tells me what I am setting the wrong kind of image for myself. What do you think, Cadence-chan?" I was puzzled, but happy that my weird behaviour was not being shunned by these two, but perhaps encouraged. "Well.." I paused a minute to collect my thoughts about Ryuzaki. "I think that you perhaps dress the way you do because you are setting an image of yourself to others, but are attempting to keep said image underrated. You want everyone to believe you are less than what you are, it will make them more prone to messing up more around you. The way you sit is bizarre and your manner is almost child-like, and people seem to treat you in a child-like way, except I know that you are very much an adult and have probably had as much of a childhood as I have." I stopped once more and blushed deeper, "I know you probably think I'm weird. But I'm usually good at reading people, except everyone hates me because I'm so honest and observant. I've never actually had any real friends." I looked down into my hands and found them quite empty without my little doll.
I wiped the remaining tears and blood from my face, and stuck a bit of napkin on my lip in an attempt to stop it from bleeding any more. So much blood. I shuddered and thought about last night, my heart suddenly plummeted. "My mother? Is she okay?" Ryuzaki looked up at me, and nodded. "She is alive, but has slipped into a coma. I hear that Cadence-chan is the reason she is still breathing and should be quite proud that she saved her mothers life." I only nodded at the compliment of my actions, "It wont matter much if she dies in the end." I whispered out, half-hoping that they wouldn't hear me. Light reached for me again and this time pulled me back so I was looking into his soft brown eyes, "Don't say that, okay? You saved a life, your mothers life. She is fighting and you shouldn't give up on her. Alright?" I nodded again, surprised at how much he seemed to care for me. I found myself seriously questioning them now, "I know that you're probably the ones with the monitoring van, but I don't understand why you are acting like you care so much?" It came out sounding snippier then it should have, I was grateful for the company and the jokes, but I wanted answers. "I mean, you have him in custody, right? So, are you looking for a statement or something?" Ryuzaki continued his long stare at me, Light glanced over at the boy chained to his wrist. "You know, that's kind of a little too kinky for public, the whole 'chained up lover' thing?" I said to break the cold silence I myself had created. I seen Ryuzaki grimace and smile while Light just turned a dark red colour, Oh, I see. So they don't even know yet. I smiled at the two uncomfortable men in front of me.
Ryuzaki decided to ignore my second question and instead answered the first set. "Yes, we have your-the attacker in custody. We also do require a statement, but we are here because we care, Cadence. This may or may not surprise you but we have set up a series of cameras in your house and have been watching you and your family for weeks in an attempt to build a case against your father and his associates." Cadence probably would not have believed the raven-like boy if he had not faltered at the use of 'father' in his sentences. It made him seem human, and it was touching that they would visit her for more than just information. "You know, it's a good thing you aren't the police. Or else I wouldn't be helping you at all." I spoke after a moment of thinking things through. Light looked surprised at my comment, and questioned the vile in my voice at the mention of the police.
So I told them my overall story. I told them how often I had been abused, how both my mother and I had attempted to get away but were never able to get far before he got us back. I told them how I believed my father had been paying off certain crooked cops in an attempt to keep us from coming to the police anymore, and how I had known about the surveillance but had been worried that if I had shown any idea of knowing when it came to the cameras, then the watchers might've become worried and taken down the cameras before they had a chance to capture anything incriminating. I also told them about the evidence I had gathered against my Father, and how I was waiting for the day I could pay him back by watching his own criminal instincts destroy him in the end. I was smiling and giddy when I said this, the hunger of it gave me away. I can be a sick-fuck when it comes to wanting revenge against those who had wronged me in the past. Ryuzaki looked at me again, his stares were growing longer and more thoughtful as they progressed, but they didn't really bother me. In fact, they were comforting. I, myself had been known to watch people just a little too closely, and had only just learned not to stare like he was because it just got me into trouble at school. I smiled at the panda-like man and waited for him to conclude his thinking and release an answer to my story. Light just was beside me in his chair, sipping a cup of black coffee and absent-mindedly fixing his perfect hair. See, I knew it. He is totally into himself and just a little too innocent to be Kira. But he still looks like a God. I studied Ryuzaki and Light further, enjoying the comfortable silence the room had taken up. Well, it was comfortable to me, but I was used to much worse situations and found that silence could be nice when shared with people who weren't out to kill you. "I take back what I thought before Light, I don't think you are Kira." I told the boy with auburn hair and red-brown eyes. He seemed a bit surprised at this relapse in conversation and Ryuzaki looked a bit displeased at my words. "Why do you say that, Cadence-chan? Why do you suddenly believe Ratio-kun to be innocent?" The raven tipped his head a bit to the right, and awaited my reply. "Ratio? You mean Light? I guess I just hoped he was Kira. I always wanted to be saved by him, and then I found out you saved me, Light. Well you and Ryuzaki, in fact, maybe you are Kira, Ryuzaki." I paused and seen Light turn and chuckle at the angry looks Ryuzaki was betraying with his slight narrowing of his brows, this was the only indication of anger in the raven's looks but somehow we had both picked up on it. I knew it, they are close. "I didn't mean to offend you Ryuzaki, I just have lived with a criminal for my entire life and I just want to see him pay for what he's done, especially if my mother..doesn't make it." I collected my emotions and further went on "Plus, Light seems far too innocent and holds a sense of justice that is too stand-off-ish when compared to Kira's actions, although I am quite sure he might even admire the actions Kira sometimes takes. He would be far too uncomfortable with the idea of killing so many people, even if they are criminals, to be able to be Kira. That is my reasoning."
I felt that he was taking my words seriously, he contemplated them and appeared to be making another decision. "Cadence-chan, I know that you would wish to stay with your mother. But I would like you to know that you could have a home where you would be free to grow up and be safe and learn more then what you are learning now. I'm sure school is quite boring to you, is it not?" I nodded, dreading the idea of going back to school and creating another lie to explain the absences and injuries. I have had to fake a great deal of clumsiness in order to prevent getting pulled out of school by my father. If he ever suspected that the school had been told of my treatment, I would've lost the only escape I had, even if the escape itself was lonely, boring and miserable.
Light looked puzzled at this invitation, "What are you talking about Ryuzaki? What home is that?" Ryuzaki played a flawless performance, "I am not sure yet, Light-kun. But I may be able to acquire a house that will understand Cadence's needs and would take her into their family. I have assisted other children with this before." I liked the option but was not enjoying the way this conversation hinted at my mothers low chances for waking up. I think Ryuzaki noticed a minute too late that he gave this away in the conversation, "I do not mean to upset you, Cadence-chan. I merely wish to be honest with you, even if that will hurt you more. Of course there is a chance that your mother will wake up and will be quite alright." I wondered at the odds of this, the possibility that she would wake up is probably in the 40's, but that she would be "quite alright" seemed much lower. I repeated these odds to Ryuzaki who agreed with them, but added to the second percent by a few numbers, 27% is more likely, Cadence-chan. I smiled at the genius sitting in front of me. "I appreciate your honesty, Ry." I said on a whim, then realized I had changed his name without meaning to. Ry? As in Ryan? Like the boy I used to know in school when I was younger. He had also had dark eyes and dark hair and a thoughtful look to him, but he had moved away a few months before the whole sorry experiences of Cadence's life had truly begun. I found myself dazing off, "I had a friend named Ryan when I was little. He was so weird, and he liked sugar like you do. But who didn't, we were just 6 year olds then. But I called him Ry, it was my special name for him. I missed him when he left." I started closing my eyes and felt a second blanket being added on top of me by Light along with a soft and familiar doll being placed in my hands. My angel, even if he's not my God. I smiled and found myself asleep once more.
***
Ryuzaki stayed sitting in the uncomfortable hospital chair for another few minutes watching the young girl in front of him sleeping. She was strangely deceptive in her ways, he assumed she would be another foolish teenager with grand imaginings of Kira, the cool killer who wanted to create anarchy on this world. Instead, she had seen the true idea of what Kira wanted, and believed it to be a true way of thinking. Not that one can completely blame her, with the way she has been raised. She had probably seen many things that left her on the brink of childhood sanity, although it was not much worse than what many Wammy children witnessed during their short lives. In fact, by those standards, she was probably one of the lucky ones, although the full extent of the emotional, physical and psychological scarring was yet to be seen to L.
He had only now read the full medical reports on her labelled [Cadence Taylor] Confidential Medical Records which gave details and even photographs on her past injuries. Several of them made L shudder slightly, there were delicate lines on her back, a poem of obedience had been carved there with a knife in elaborate script: "Daughter, obedience gives strength." Except it looked like if had been done many times over many years, causing them to be forever ingrained on her soft skin. It was truly horrible and L wondered how such abuse could be kept so well hidden, It must be true then. That this "Steven Taylor" was paying off the cops and maybe even second-rate medical people to keep quiet about the abuse. But why go this far? L knew that her father must be ever more deranged than he had previously thought. L knew these words from his study of Catholicism, they had been spoken by Saint Teresa of Avila, it was a sick sentiment to carve into the young girls back. As if the physical act could force her to obey him. There had been other images put into her skin, a large cross, circled by smaller brandings of elaborate crosses, as if to symbolize the burden of sacrifice for others then there was the ivy leaves which were also present; as if her body had been a canvas. Ivy leaves, symbols for eternal fidelity.
"Light-kun, can I assume you know something of symbolism?" L finally spoke as they got up from the chairs and made their way to the car, where Watari was undoubtedly parked and waiting for them. "For some things, yes, of course. What do you mean?" L passed over the photos he had just been given by Cadence's main doctor, he heard a Light pull in a sharp breath. "Oh my god, Ryuzaki. He was drawing on her like she was a piece of property to be owned and marked." He passed over the obedience line, pink and white from years of being written on her skin. "The letters look like they took forever to make, they were painstakingly created and recreated. As if he had to remind her about them. And even the crosses and ivy leaves, they are so elaborate. She must not have been able to move, or feared moving more then the pain she had at receiving these..these markings." Light thought for a minute, "I know these words. They are very familiar and as for the cross I obviously know the symbolism behind it. And ivy leaves symbolize a bond or eternal faithfulness, correct?" Light looked up at the older detective to discern if he was correct or not. L nodded at the paling boy as they got into the car, the chain making such an action a bit awkward, even with practice. "He really wanted to fuck with her and twist her mind." Light whispered at the photographs of the young girl, where there was a scar of a broken heart carved into her fragile neck. All of the scars were very old and had only been recently recorded. "Yes, the carvings seem to be his way of disrupting her mind. I have yet to see if Cadence-Chan has surpassed this goal or not. I will be monitoring her situation along with her mother's."
L stopped speaking in English and switched over to Japanese, sounding like both languages were his native tongue and addressed his old friend and caretaker, "Watari, has the team made any progress with Steven Taylor?" L reached out his hand to grab at the files the old man was holding out to him, while still driving the two boys back to the hotel they were currently staying at, he briefed them on the contents of the folder in better detail. "While the suspect has said nothing in regards to his crimes and his actions with the "Blood Rose" group. We have gathered that he was neither a leader nor was he a small player in the activities of the gang. In fact, he seems to have been involved in many high up scandals and actions but seems to lack any real intelligence in matters. I assume you have reviewed last nights tapes and heard about the Kira website's and Steven Taylor's real name?" Watari looked into the rearview mirror and seen the two boys nod, before continuing. "Well, it turns out that Cadence is quite the detective. She has truly done an amazing job documenting her father's crimes, giving a great deal of evidence and the use of his real name has helped to connect him to a larger network of crimes and criminals." The older man sounded quite impressed by the young girl's skills.
Watari looked into L's eyes and asked in a casual manner if he should "prepare a home for the young child?" Light was busy looking at the file in order to make much fuss over the conversation, it appeared as if Watari was merely looking after the young victim in question. L answered as honestly as he could, "If her mother doesn't make it, Watari, she will need a place to live. It appears she has no other family, even when checking using her real name. So then yes, prepare a home for her. I will look over the details when you have completed them, this child is going to require a special placement as she is very intelligent and shows great potential." Watari nodded, the matter having been settled the car became very quiet.
L leaned forward to open up a compartment in the back of front seat, he grabbed out a container of multi-coloured marshmallows and ate them in a strange pattern of colour (orange, yellow, white, green and pink, orange, yellow, white, green and pink, and so on). "Light-kun, do you believe that Cadence could be of assistance in this matter of the "Blood Rose" group?" Light noticed the pattern in which the strange man was eating his marshmallows and thought about what he had said. "Yes, Ryuzaki. I believe she could help us, and maybe by helping bring her father to justice this way she can learn to see that Kira's justice is truly flawed." L was silent to Light's response and the cars silence grew slightly awkward. To break it Light asked Ryuzaki rudely if they tasted any better by eating them in a certain order, to which the detective smugly replied "Why, yes. Would Light-kun care for some to go along with his Jello?" Which effectively shut the younger boy up and caused Watari to smile and shake his head in his strange and knowing way.
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A/N: Soo, there it is. My attempt, I'm also working on a MattxMello story since I adore those boys. But for now it is this. I have been deathly ill these past few days and felt the need to do something productive *eyes the pile of school work sitting next to her bed* Okay, Okay! So by productive I meant fun and entertainining. It is awful how my weekends end so quickly. But anywayyy..
Did you like it? I have to admit that those bold quotes are not mine, they are quotes from a "Doctor of the Church" St. Teresa of Avila, a woman that I am drawing an awful lot from in this. The whole quote on poor Cadence's back is also from her, you should look her up. She's kinda interesting, I'm going to continue using her for stuff. Hmmm.. Tell me how I am doing? Are the characters looking okay? What do you think of the one I created? Is she up to par with the other Wammy kids? She certainly has had an awful past, which should be some sort of "needed" in order to get into that school of brilliance.
But yes, I just sorta posted my first ever fanfic and I'm nervous. Mostly I'm worried it wont get read, and if it does I'm gonna get horrible rantings about how awful I am at writing (please don't crush my heart, thanks). :P Jokes, I want complete honesty here, people. I am unsure as to where this is going, I'm letting the characters tell the story, Cadence is leading followed by L and Light and all the others. I'm not sure who else is gonna join in, but yeah. Did you notice they are not in Japan? I'm not completely sure where they are, but they are somewhere.. aha ;)
As for the LxLight thing that I am predicting, it's mostly because I love them.. so, it must happen. And besides, EVERYONE can see the sexual tension between the two (Cadence, Watari) I'm sure even Matsuda will see it and make life very awkward.. They are chained together and doing gawd knows what to eachother when they are left to their own crazy selves.. :D
Hope you weren't too upset by the abuse here, I couldn't bring myself to let Cadence get rapped, although that would've probably really effed her up and made it much more likely that she loses it to the Kira fever! But, IDK. It makes me ill to think of it, I hate child abuse (I mean, who doesn't right?) soo I put it in knowing it was necessary, (It makes Cadence aka Teresa De Soto -more to come to explain- who she is..) but I just couldn't let that sick SOB get away with anything else, I mean he's practically carved his name into her skin since she was a kid.. does he really need to take away her last bit of innocence? besides, maybe someone at Wammy wanted that.. gawdd..
:D I miss being 15.. It was a very exciting time. Now I'm all old and dying practically (well, okay I'm 19.. but thats not the point) I just know what it is like to be 15 and underestimated and depressed at times.. I wasn't so very emo :P but I had my days. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and are kind enough to tell me what you thought and whatnot. Give me the honest input, I just threw up all I have written in the past few hours.. :) and tell me about any errors, I'm editing right now, but I miss mistakes sometimes.. so just READ & REVIEW!
Thanks so much, kids! :D
*hearts* (thankfully the end of the world's largest Author's Note.. GAH!)
-Zilander Kat
