Angela was the pretty one.
In fact, she was the prettiest girl in Brumly, and probably all of Tulsa. She might just have been the prettiest thing in all of the United States. She had real nice blue eyes, and lightly tanned skin. Her long dark hair fell effortlessly down her back like a cape, and she looked how so many young girls wanted to look, naturally.
Angela was hood royalty. Any greasers dream girl. But she was strong, independent, and mean. Angela always got the last word in, and she always got what she wanted. That's why I was so shocked, when she told me she wanted me.
Angela had always known I liked girls, and only girls. I never told her, she just knew. We had been close friends since the day we ran into each other, I was six, and she was still only four, but we were best friends since. She might have been almost two years younger than me, but Angela Shepard was the dominate one. She bossed me around, and naturally I listened, giving her advice, or refusing her demands, only when I felt they were absolutely needed.
I was fourteen and she had just turned thirteen, when Angela told me she wanted me, and wanted to date me. I had thought that Angela was normal, the way she was always chasing boys, and though I had had a crush on her for years I figured I could never have Angie. But hearing that she liked me back, gave me this little buzz inside, and from the look in her face, she felt it too. We were right for each other.
But atlas, two girls aren't allowed to love each other. And so it became are best kept secret. To everyone else in Brumly, our poor little subdivision, we were only good friends, and just that.
Angela claimed she had to do more to cover it up. Said her brother Tim was getting suspicious. I figured that Angie was just the sort of person who has to be with a bunch of people all at once. And while it hurt to see her kissing other boys, and bragging to others about sleeping with them, I kept my yap shut. After all, at the end of the day, or whenever she had a problem, Angie always returned to me. And that's all that really matter, because if you let something go and it comes back, that means it really does love you.
I'm still not sure why I agreed to date Rocky Veni though. Maybe it was to get even with Angie, maybe it was to keep my daddy happy, but seeing as we both didn't care for each other all to much, why we stayed together for two years is beyond me.
Like me, Rocky wasn't all too pretty, but he was pretty smart, and he was a part of Tim's gang, and had a high rank in it. We'd meant when I came to the Shepherd's place for Angie, and we just started talking, and just like that he kissed me. And for whatever reason, I went and kissed him back, right in front of Angie.
Rocky was a good boyfriend. He didn't mind that I wasn't all that bright, or that I didn't look very pretty. He said he just liked me. Never have I meant a sweeter boy. I loved him, but not in the way you love someone you're going steady with. I loved him like a good friend, though we were dating. It was sorta flip flopped. I was dating Rocky, but we were really just good friends, and everyone thought me and Angie were just good friends, but we were dating.
But Rocky and I still did dating stuff. One time he stole a car, and went for a joy ride all around town with me, took me to the pictures and everything. Another time, he stole me someone's class ring, so I could wear it around my neck. And he never let anyone mess with me, and he called me his girl.
And I guess that's why I feel so guilty. Because Rocky really did love me, and I don't know if I ever really loved him. I don't know if you even can love two people, in the same 'zact way at once. But sometimes, when I was cuddled against Rocky and holding hands with him, and he'd call me his girl, I feel that 'zact same little buzz I feel with Angie, and found myself wishing I could stay like that forever.
They came to me first. Curly was pounding on my door at one in the morning, and before my step siblings could all wake up, or my dad could beat me to the door, I ran down in my night clothes and opened it.
"Brendy!" He said, like everyone always calls me. "Get your ass out here! It's urgent!" He grabbed me out the door before I could close it, and lead me down the street.
It seemed like everyone under twenty four was outside in the street, which was weird because it was one in the morning, and daddy always says nothing goods out at one in the morning. I had this real sick feeling, that something horrible had happened, like another shooting, and I instantly wondered about Angie, and if she was okay.
But I didn't have time to ask Curly any questions, not that he'd answer them, because soon he was pushing us though a crowd, and I saw what all the fuss was about. There, lying on the street like road kill, was the boy that for two years had called me his girl, and gave me all he could. There, with a growing scarlet spot on his chest, was the only boy who'd ever really loved me. There was Rocky Veni, dying right in front of me.
"We got Brenda for you." Curly called, marching me through the crowd. All I could do was stare at that big old gash on his side. And then, at my name, Rocky's eyes shot open, and he came back to life for a little bit. He smiled.
"Brenda?" He croaked.
"Yeah, that's me, I'm here." I answered, kneeling down and taking his hand, like I'd seen people do in movies were people die.
"Brenda...Brenda I love you. You're the best girl I've ever had, and a man could ever get. You were always so true and different. I'm going to miss you." That made me feel real guilty, because I'd never once stopped dating or loving Angie, and so I was never once true to Rocky.
"You'll be alright Rocky." I found myself saying. "Don't worry you ain't going no where."
Rocky smiled and clutched my hand a little tighter. "You're a sweet girl, that's rare around here. Don't you let nobody change that, since I ain't around to make sure no one does."
I nodded real fast. "No, I won't change Rocky, I promise."
I moved a little, because Tim had come around, and he was saying stuff too, only we weren't listening, and I can't remember what he was talking about.
"Don't-don't leave." Rocky squeaked. He was more freaked out than I'd ever seen him before.
"I won't. I ain't goin' nowhere Rocky." I promised him. We stayed like that for what seems like a real long while, while the crowd around us flittered around. It was just me and Rocky holding hands. I almost forgot he was dying.
And then, Rocky asked me to do something I won't ever forget.
"Brenda-k-kiss me one last time." He said it just like that, stammering, and like it wasn't a question.
I didn't really want to. Kissing someone while there dying isn't as sweet as that song makes it out to be. People who are dying usually have blood and stuff coming out of them in weird place, and Rocky was spitting blood and spit everywhere. But I leaned in and kissed him anyways, so he'd be happy.
It tasted like blood, salt and spit, but most of my kisses from Rocky were kinda like that. I didn't really think it'd be the last time he kissed me, or the last time I saw him, but when I looked up Rocky was staring into space, a far away look in his eye, and he had a big old grin on his face. An ambulance man came over and pushed me away. And that was the last time I kissed a boy. And the last time I saw Rocky Veni. And I swore to myself that would be the last time I ever let myself love a boy, or a person who wasn't Angie. It was just too hard.
Hi guys, this is my first Outsiders fanfic, and I'm a bit excited about it! This chapter is just the prologue and it'll get better and less OC-ish later on, I promise. Rocky and Brenda are my OC's, but Angela is actually Tim and Curly's younger sister, and I thought she'd do prefect for this story. Unlike the real Angela, this one is older than Curly, and will be portrayed in the light of Brenda, who obviously really admires her. I might write this in different views, but I thought Brenda's would be the best for Rocky's death.
Anyways I hope you guys liked this, and if it gets popular enough, I will probably update quickly. I'd love to here every one's opinions and ideas, so please, if you could, review. I hope I didn't completely fail at this, but even if I did, I want to know, I love improving my writing. Also, I promise to respond in the next chapter, to any and all reviews I get.
Thanks for reading!:)
