Thanks for your kind words and faves from the first story. This one is also on AO3, and now we're caught up.
Alex tries to be careful. There are too many things that can go wrong, too many moments where it's easy to slip up. Despite the fact that they fell into bed after their second date, Alex vows to take things slowly when Casey leaves her apartment around noon, their morning shower going until the water went cool.
That vow evaporates when they have dinner after work the following Monday. Alex can't keep her hands off of Casey, pushing her inside her apartment after Casey walks her home, pulling her into the bedroom and keeping her there until the early hours of the morning. When Casey leaves with one last kiss, Alex reminds herself that she is nothing if not persistent. She makes the vow again.
This time, she makes it two days, and that's with her deliberately avoiding Casey at the office. The woman is a siren, luring her to exactly what she shouldn't be doing — lingering in the doorway of her office, taking an extra ten minutes over coffee between the courthouse and Hogan. It's too easy to give in, every time. It doesn't seem like Casey even tries to pull her in. Alex wonders if this is precisely why they stayed so far apart previous to this, because if they hadn't, they'd be in each other's orbit all the time.
By all logic, they're supposed to start slowly. There are about a dozen reasons they shouldn't be doing this, but they're all outweighed by the one reason they should: because they want to. Alex has never found someone who understands the job, knows the highs and lows. Someone who knows that things are rarely easy.
Casey doesn't seem to care to use the pull she has over Alex, which gives her even more power. Alex thinks Casey must know by now that she's completely re-written Alex's social rule book, but she's never asked. Casey's an outlier in her entire dating history, as Alexandra in New York and Massachusetts, Emily in Wisconsin, and Jennifer in South Dakota.
Alex doesn't even think that she had rules, borne from experiences of ill-fated relationships, selective friendships and varied one night stands, but she realizes it shortly after Casey appeared. Gone are the meticulously thought-out dates and formulaic events and engagements. Even invitations extended to her more casual bedmates were more planned than some of her dates with Casey.
They go out for upscale drinks or fine dining, but usually to close out a day of exploring the city like tourists. Alex would have never gone to Mmuseumm, but with Casey, she might even prefer it over the Morgan Library. She takes Casey to the Met and the Whitney, but they'll end up at a bar after, Casey half-watching the Rangers, never the Islanders, before they end up at someone's apartment.
It goes like this for another three weeks, but after Casey stays over three work nights in a row after a weekend spent around the city by day and in Alex's bed by night, it's difficult to say this is casual. It seems too logical when they agree that they're dating, monogamously, and even though there isn't anyone else, Alex doesn't let herself think about what that means.
Two months after, Casey notices that she sleeps over at Alex's more often. It isn't a discussion, barely two sentences of out-loud observation, but it's only in the dark of the bedroom where there's an uncharacteristic eight inches of space between them that Alex says what she wanted to say when Casey's head was in her lap in the living room, looking up at her.
"You live close to my previous apartment," Alex says, looking firmly at the drapes in the darkness. She feels the bed shift, Casey's probably rolling over to face her, but she doesn't make any other noise.
Casey's out-lawyering her, letting the silence do the talking, and Alex knows there's no other way this is going to go. "When I heard the address on the tape, that's when it was real." They aren't strangers to threats, hate mail and the occasional confrontation on the steps of the courthouse, but hearing it in on tape in a dim meeting room had been completely different. It hadn't been the first time Alex's personal and professional lives collided, but it had been the first time Alex's powers of compartmentalization couldn't do a damn thing.
Casey stays silent, but Alex senses her shift closer still, resting her arm around Alex's midsection. Alex doesn't consider herself a cuddler, but with Casey around, she could be one.
"The night of our first date, I went four blocks west before I came back around. So I'd be on the right side of the street."
Casey presses her face to the back of Alex's neck, burying her face in her hair. Neither of them say anything. Casey squeezes her gently, kisses her shoulder — the right one, all scar tissue and stiff joints — then settles behind her. Alex's whole body relaxes, hips and back and neck all at once, and yet again, Casey unknowingly wields her power.
They don't discuss it again, but Alex clears some closet space for Casey the next morning before going to start the coffee while Casey takes a shower.
Another month after that, Casey stops by Alex's office on her way out, coat over her arm. Alex is up to her neck in paperwork, and the wistful smile on Casey's face tells her that she doesn't have to say anything. They're supposed to get dinner, but the only thing that Alex is doing in the foreseeable future is file review.
Casey looks behind her briefly. They haven't told anyone yet, in or outside of the office, about their relationship. At first, it had been because they were trying to take things as they came. Then, it had been not to put any more pressure on themselves than they already had. After that, it seemed like the right thing to do; there was no written protocol explicitly prohibiting their relationship, but there was enough chance of implicit disapproval.
The coast appears to be clear, because Casey opens her mouth. "Give me your key," Casey says.
"Good evening to you, too," Alex replies, but she reaches for her bag anyways to give Casey what she's demanded.
"Steak or chicken?"
"Steak."
Casey nods, then checks her phone. "Think you'll be done around eight?"
Alex looks at her desk, three stacks of files to the side, then back at Casey. "Do I have a choice?"
Casey gives her a smug smile in response, dimple teasing, and leaves.
When Alex gets to her apartment at half past eight, dinner is ready, Casey's pouring the wine, and half of the cookware is already drying on the in-sink rack.
"You're amazing." Dropping her briefcase on the chair by the door, Alex walks over and kisses Casey hello. She's changed into a t-shirt and Alex's ancient Yale crew sweatpants, and the sight of casual Casey is just too endearing.
"Maybe taste it first," Casey says, but Alex just gives her a look. Casey can outcook Alex — not that it's that difficult — any day of the week.
After dinner, Alex is signing off on the last of her files while Casey alternates between practicing her opening statement for next week and setting up her team for the start of fantasy baseball season. She can't understand how Casey's mind goes back and forth between the two effortlessly, and immediately as soon as she thinks it, Casey looks up at her.
"Task rotation is an essential part of productivity," is all Casey says, sitting up and putting her notepad on her side of the couch. Just like they have sides of the bed, they have sides of the couch already, at both their places. Alex's side has the crossword and case files, the coffee table is the 'neutral zone' for drinks and remotes, and Casey's side has her iPad, watch and earrings. It never escapes Alex how domesticated the two of them can be, and it feels comfortable and uneasy at the same time. It must be manifesting as bafflement on her face, because Casey continues. "Your pen stopped. I figured you were trying to figure out what I was doing."
Alex pushes her glasses up on her nose and rolls her eyes. Casey is freakishly attuned to her, which is probably why she doesn't say anything about the power she has in this relationship. "Not everything is about you," Alex says, but she smirks when she says it to take out all the sting.
Casey smiles innocently and moves to straddle Alex's lap. "Maybe not," she allows, "but you're paying an awful lot of attention to me right now." She leans in for a kiss, but Alex is too quick for her. One hand slides up Casey's back, into her now-short hair, and tugs to expose the soft skin of her neck. Alex nips at Casey's throat, then under her jaw, while her other hand slides into her back pocket to keep her close. It's not long before Casey's squirming on top of her. No matter how many ways Casey can bend Alex's rules, Alex knows exactly how and when to wield her power.
Mewling as Alex nuzzles at the neckline of her v-neck, teeth teasing, Casey impatiently tugs at Alex's sweater. "Alex," Casey says, voice pitched higher than usual. Alex hums against Casey's sternum, before kissing her way up to capture Casey's mouth with her own. Open and hungry, this is how Alex had thought, once upon a time, that their first kiss would go. It was the exact opposite, but that doesn't mean that Alex can't kiss her like this as many times as she wants now.
Eventually they make it to the bedroom, already naked by the time they make it to on to the bed, and Alex makes sure she's on top. Casey writhes under her, moaning as Alex makes her come first with her fingers, and then her tongue. It's never been about dominance in the bedroom, but Alex is pretty sure this is one of the few ways she has to tell Casey just how much power they can wield over one another.
They still haven't had the key talk some weeks later, but Casey borrows Alex's with some regularity. Alex still doesn't go to Casey's apartment without her, but she knows Casey doesn't expect her to start. Alex has a late afternoon motions hearing, and since Casey will be on her way back to the office after arraignments, they've already agreed that Casey will take Alex's keys and start on dinner. It's been a week since Casey's been able to stay the night, a rarity these days, so they had both wanted to make sure that tonight is about them.
Alex hadn't expected the two of them to get serious this quickly, but Casey just fits. She knows when to push, she knows when Alex needs her space. Sure, she watches too much ESPN some days, avoids laundry like the plague, and speaks too quickly for her own good sometimes, but it all seems miniscule in the face that they've been together for almost half a year.
Casey's already in front of the courtroom, and she smiles briefly at Alex as she approaches. They're always careful in public, but Alex can physically feel it getting harder as she schools her grin into a closed-mouth smile. And then the door behind Casey opens, and Olivia and Nick are joining Casey as an awkward welcoming party of three.
"Detectives, Counselor," Alex says as she approaches. Olivia and Nick nod their greetings. "Casey, can I see you before motions?"
Casey nods, and the two of them duck into an unused room across the hall. "What's going on?" Casey asks as soon as the door shuts.
"You asked for my key earlier today," Alex reminds her. She's taken it off the ring already, so she gives it loose to Casey, who puts it in her bag.
Sighing, Casey looks relieved. "I thought something bad happened."
"No, nothing."
There's a moment of silence; something starts to tighten in Alex's chest, ice forming in the pit of her stomach, and she knows something is about to happen.
"You could have … oh." Casey's face goes courtroom-neutral, and that doesn't ease the tension inside of Alex.
This is not the time, nor the place, for this conversation, but Alex can't stop herself from opening her mouth. The dread gives way for something else, just as uncomfortable but searing hot now. "Oh, what?"
"I get it," Casey says, her voice colder than usual. She goes to leave, but Alex reaches out, holds her by the forearm.
"Say it," Alex challenges. It's short-sighted, she has to be in chambers in minutes and be the perfectly poised Alexandra Cabot, but she can't let go.
Casey pulls her arm away, but doesn't make to leave. "Not going to draw your own conclusion, Counselor?" she snaps. "Would it have been the end of the world if you gave me your extremely non-descript key without asking me to hide with you?"
Alex takes a breath, presses her lips together to force herself to slow down. "Would it be the smart thing to do to give you a key in front of two detectives?"
"We're lawyers. We're quick thinkers. It could have been your office key, for Christ's sake."
"Or, we could leave nothing to question." Alex crosses her arms. She can practically feel her Ice Queen armor slipping on, familiar and battle-hardened. Eventually, this would have come up, but of course it has to happen during the workday, at the courthouse, when both of them are supposed to be at their sharpest.
The muscle in Casey's cheek twitches. "What's the worst that could happen?"
A hundred scenarios that Alex has thought about before rush through her head all at once, varying in plausibility. Some always rise to the top: they both get fired, they both get suspended, maybe Uncle Bill doesn't approve of Casey. "It doesn't matter what the worst is. What does matter is that there aren't many great outcomes." Alex glares at Casey, and while others would cower, Casey seems to rise.
"We've been making excuses for weeks, Alex, and we're still here. We can't be a secret forever."
"Excuses?"
"We're figuring things out, people will talk, we don't know what the future holds," Casey says, voice going mockingly high as she lists of their — Alex's — reasons as to why they don't share their relationship, even with mutual friends. "We're still here," she repeats.
Alex knows she's cutting her time dangerously close, and then her phone goes, an alarm to remind her that she has to be in chambers in five minutes. "This isn't over," she says, and she leaves before Casey can say anything else.
