Lexie/Mark --- post-Blink. "Because you're being unreasonable and he's a wreck and he's kind of my best friend. And also because Meredith isn't sure Mexico can support your drinking habit if you keep up at this rate." one-shot

A/N: I apologize for any inconsistencies...I try to stay as in character as possible. I missed a few episodes of Season 6, however, so there's a possibility I've messed something up.


"Don't you judge me," Lexie warns as she stumbles into the living room, bag of chips under her arm, salsa and tequila in tow.

Meredith raises her eyebrows as Derek grins at her. "Wouldn't dream of it," she insists.

"You're gonna get fat," Cristina smirks as Lexie tosses a fully loaded chip into her mouth.

Lexie scrunches her nose at Cristina as she licks salsa from her lips. "When I stress, I eat," she remarks. "Getting huge is just a perk."

"A perk?" Meredith dares, eyeing her sister strangely.

Lexie nods as she washes her chips down with a long swig of tequila. "My plan is to sit here until I become large and hideous. Then, I'll have an excuse not to leave the house and you won't be able to yell at me."

"You also won't be able to sleep with other women's husbands," Cristina points out. She shrugs casually. "Because, of the largeness and the hideousness."

Lexie scowls, scooping another chip into her mouth.

"Might I intervene for a minute?" Derek asks, obviously unable to keep his opinion to himself.

"No," Lexie, Meredith, and Cristina all remark.

Owen walks into the room, shrugging slightly. "I can't find the alcohol," he explains.

"Oh, well, that's because Tropical Storm Lexie's ingested it all," Cristina grins.

Lexie stuffs more chips into her mouth. "Do not judge," she says to no one in particular.

Meredith shrugs. "I tried to drown myself."

"I raided the dollar store," Cristina offers.

"I'm going to run to the liquor store," Owen remarks, paying no mind to the Lexie situation.

"You got yourself a good man," Meredith jokes.

Cristina rolls her eyes.

"I'm really not allowed to say anything here?" Derek asks again as the front door shuts.

Meredith shakes her head. "No way. You're a boy. You don't get an opinion on this."

"And you definitely don't get to say, I told you so," Lexie grumbles, forcing down some more tequila.

"But," Derek begins.

Lexie shakes her head violently. "No, just don't," she warns him. "I get it. I forced him to choose his daughter over me which was stupid and selfish and petty. I then proceeded to sleep with Izzy's husband, never mind the fact that I was a bit drunk and very, very messed up. So, I've been handed the most recent dirty mistress award, and while none of the irony is lost on me, I just really, really cannot talk about this with you."

Derek sighs, turning to Meredith. "Fine," he remarks, meeting her eyes.

"Thank god," Meredith remarks in relief.

Cristina and Lexie exchange confused looks.

"Okay," Meredith begins, snatching the bag of chips away from her sister. "While you did something that was extremely stupid and perhaps even unforgivable, you're not the only one who messed up."

Lexie rolls her eyes. "If you two are breaking up, could you wait a week or something? I'm really not ready to turn my break-up into another MerDer dramafest."

"Now, I'm offended," Derek remarks.

Meredith ignores him and continues. "He slept with Addison."

"You slept with Addison?!" both Lexie and Cristina yell at Derek.

"What? Me? No!"

"Mark!" Meredith remarks loudly over the chaos.

Lexie's eyes freeze on her sister's. "Mark?"

"Slept with Addison," Meredith finishes slowly.

Lexie turns away, staring blankly at the tv.

"Are you okay?" Meredith asks slowly.

Lexie shrugs. "We were broken up. Are. We are broken up. He can sleep with whoever he wants to."

Meredith sighs. "Lex, we weren't going to tell you, but you've been beating yourself up over this Alex thing, and I thought that maybe knowing that he slept with someone else too would help you feel a little better about everything."

She snatches the chips back from her sister, cramming a handful into her mouth at once.

"I bet Addison doesn't stress eat," Lexie remarks, unscrewing the tequila lid once more. "It's also probably impossible for her to get large and hideous."

Cristina turns to Meredith knowingly. "Yeah, I'd say she feels just fine," she remarks sarcastically.


"What are you doing?" Callie asks inquisitively, her eyebrows raised in concern.

Lexie shoves the remainder of the snack food into her mouth quickly, disposing of any evidence. "Nothing," she manages between chewing.

"Yeah, okay," Callie rolls her eyes. "Why don't you just talk to him."

"He won't talk to me," Lexie insists, eyes roaming the cafeteria for any sign of him.

"He's not here," Callie tells her. "He's finishing up on a rhinoplasty."

"Oh," Lexie nods, reaching into her purse for another twinkie.

Callie frowns. "You're going to get fat. Or diabetes."

Lexie nods in agreement as she polishes off another baked good. "I'm completely okay with either one of those options," she admits.

"So this is how you're going to deal?" Callie asks incredulously. "You're just going to finish off all of the twinkies in the vending machine."

Lexie winces. "Actually, I already did that. I'm moving on to chocolate covered pretzels next."

Callie laughs. "You're extremely strange, you know that right?"

Lexie nods. "I memorize everything I see, I live in an attic, and this morning I spent ten minutes hiding under the desktop of the nurses' station, because Mark was reviewing a patient's chart and I didn't want to see him." She crumbles up the trash from her binge eating and sighs. "So, yeah, I know I have some issues."

Callie shakes her head. "You're being kind of immature about all of this."

"Immature," Lexie repeats, as if musing over the word. "Yeah, well, I'm twenty five. I'm twenty five and he wants me to be a grandmother. I think I'll take immature."

Callie scowls, standing up. "Fine, be stubborn and alone."

"I'm not alone, I have my food."

"Whatever."

"Why do you even care?" she asks pointedly, causing Callie to freeze in her tracks.

It takes a moment, but Callie turns around, arms crossed matter-of-factly. "Because he's miserable. Because you're being unreasonable and he's a wreck and he's kind of my best friend. And also because Meredith isn't sure Mexico can support your drinking habit if you keep up at this rate."

Lexie smirks in spite of her annoyance.

"Just talk to him, okay?" Callie asks. "Just once."

"I can't," Lexie insists. "I don't know why no one seems to understand that. I just can't talk to him right now."

Callie sighs, pushing her hair behind her shoulders as she stares down at Lexie. "Look, you don't want to talk to him, then fine, don't. I'm not going to force you to. In fact, this is the last time I'll even bring it up. But if you want the truth, you're being kind of a bitch about all of this. You slept with another woman's husband, you forced your boyfriend to choose you over his own daughter, and now, you can't even man up enough to talk to him, so instead you slink around this hospital, hiding in random rooms and behind furniture in order to avoid even seeing him."

Lexie swallows, looking up at Callie reluctantly. She watches her eyes for a moment before allowing her gaze to wander back down to the floor. She shuffles her feet anxiously.

"He doesn't want to see me," she admits bitterly. She sounds like a whining schoolgirl, she knows this, but it's the most honest she's been with herself in a while.

Callie shrugs, shooting Lexie a slightly sympathetic look. "He misses you," she tells her as she heads towards the door. "Everybody sees it. You just have to make him remember why you two work together. Give him a reason to listen."

Determined, she climbs to her feet, Callie's words still ringing through her head as she throws her last twinkie in the garbage can on her way out.


Her hands feel too big for her body as she pushes her hair behind her ears, walking up to Mark slowly, his expression a mixture of surprise and anger. She ignores Derek and Meredith's warning glances and tries to imagine Cristina and Bailey away.

"Uh, Lexie, why don't we go and..." Meredith begins slowly.

She takes a deep breath, looking him in the eyes, and begins, ignoring her sister's attempt to save her. "Hydrogen, helium, lithium, beryllium, boron, carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, fluorine, neon...."

"Is she drunk?" Cristina asks Meredith.

Meredith shrugs, turning to Derek.

"What in the hell is going on?" Bailey asks, perplexed.

"I don't know...." Meredith starts, staring between Lexie and Mark.

"Sodium, magnesium, aluminum, silicon, phosphorus..."

"Mark?" Derek asks slowly.

"Shh," Mark insists, holding his hand up to silence him as he stares at Lexie.

"I don't...I don't get it," Cristina admits.

"Sulfur, chlorine, argon, potassium, calcium..." She stops, taking a deep breath. "Are you going to make me keep going?" she asks desperately, locking eyes with Mark.

He shakes his head slowly, taking her by the wrist and leading her into the nearest on-call room.

"Is this like foreplay to you people?" Bailey asks, looking from Meredith to Cristina.

Meredith shakes her head while Cristina laughs.

"Your sister's even weirder than you," Cristina snorts.


"What the hell was that all about?" Mark hisses, pushing her into the closest room available.

Lexie shakes her head slowly, mouth gaping open. "I don't...I don't know."

"Lexie."

"You wouldn't talk to me!" she admits loudly. "And that worked before, so I just thought...I thought that maybe if I could get your attention, you would listen to me or...."

"Or what?"

"I don't know!" she yells. "I didn't think it through that far! I just...I just...."

"You slept with Karev," he reminds her.

She narrows her eyes. "Well, you slept with Addison."

He flinches slightly, surprised by her words.

"What, did you think I wouldn't find out?" she asks, agitated.

He runs a hand through his hair in frustration, hanging his head. "No, I just...I didn't want you to hear like that. I wanted to tell you that..."

"Oh my god," she mumbles, shock registering on her face. "Are you....you're still in love with her?"

"What?" he remarks in surprise. "Addison? No!"

She breathes a sigh of relief before collapsing onto the bed. "God, I'm such an idiot. I'm sorry. You can go. I just thought that...."

"I'm not in love with her," he insists again, sitting down next to her, his arm burning as it touches hers.

She looks up at him slowly. "How's Sloan doing?" she asks quietly, in an effort to break the tension. She watches his expression change rapidly, anger dissipating as he considers her question.

He shrugs, turning away from her. "She'll be okay. We talked a lot about what she's going to do once the baby comes."

"That's good," Lexie nods, fiddling nervously with her hair. "So, she and the baby are going to stay with you?"

"She is, for a little while," he begins. "I got her an interview at the clinic for the receptionist position. She wants to be able to support herself, get her own place, take care of her baby. I'm going to help her out until she can afford to get her own place."

Lexie smiles warmly. "You're really a great dad," she tells him fingers picking at the sheets on the mattress beneath her. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you that before. I was, I was really out of line to give you an ultimatum," she insists quietly, unable to look up at him.

He nods, watching her as she struggles to meet his gaze. "You weren't all wrong," he remarks slowly. "She's an adult now and pretty soon, she's going to be a mother. She needs to start being responsible. I just...I wanted to help her to make up for all those times in her past that I wasn't there."

She smiles up at him, daring to slip her hand over his. He doesn't pull away. "I don't want to be a twenty five year old grandmother," she smirks.

He chuckles slightly, squeezing her hand.

"But," she begins. "More importantly, I don't want to sleep with other women's husbands anymore."

He laughs loudly, grinning at her. "I don't think anybody wants you doing that."

She smiles sympathetically. "I don't want to be a grandmother and I don't want to be with anyone else," she reiterates. "I want you and if that means getting over this whole weird situation, I will. I'll even recite the entire periodic chart backwards if...."

He places a finger on her lips to silence her, grinning at her familiar rambling. "Let's get one thing clear; I wanted a life with you. Sloan was a surprise. Now that she's here, I can't just abandon her. You know I can't."

"I know," she agrees, crossing her legs so that her entire body is positioned on the bed. "It was just...you just decided everything and it was all so fast. You didn't even ask me what I thought or how I felt and...it was just really fast."

Mark nods. "I'm sorry."

She softens, leaning into him. "Can I come home now?" she asks softly.

He sighs, pulling his arms around her. "On one condition."

She stiffens, surprised. "What?" she asks, defenses shooting back up.

He grins, head tilting downward to lock eyes with her. "You have got to stop with the binge eating. Meredith had to go grocery shopping for the first time ever, and Derek's getting concerned."

She scrunches her nose as she laughs, hitting him playfully across the chest. "One fat joke and I'm gone," she insists.

"You'll have to get through me first," he grins, rolling on top of her.

"She needs to learn to knock!" Lexie insists, prying her lips away from his. "If she's going to be staying with us. Unless you're still good with the whole no sex thing."

He smirks, lips teasing her collarbone. "We'll buy a lock," he promises.


"How'd it go?" Lexie asks, looking up over the rim of her coffee cup.

Sloan shrugs, her blonde hair falling over her shoulders. "I don't know," she remarks. "Pay's all right and the hours don't completely suck. But, they said they'd call, so I don't know."

"They'll call," Lexie assures her.

Sloan rolls her eyes. "Whatever."

Lexie ignores her and turns her eyes back to her book. It's her first day off in weeks and she can't seem to figure out how to concentrate on just relaxing.

A half hour passes before she gets the feeling that something's amiss. She stands up slowly, setting her book on the couch, and saunters over to the closed bathroom door that Sloan disappeared behind almost immediately after coming home.

"Sloan?" she calls, growing worried with each passing second. "Sloan?" A little louder.

She pushes the door open with ease, her eyes searching the floor frantically and she panics when she finds Sloane sitting, fully-clothed, in the middle of the shower, head between her legs and shoulders quivering.

"Is it the baby?" she asks, panicked, climbing in and sitting down so that she's facing the young girl.

Sloan looks up hesitantly, shaking her head slowly. "No," she remarks, between tears. "No, I...I don't know."

Lexie watches her as she crumbles within herself, unable to figure out what to do to help her feel better. She places her arm around her loosely, almost reluctant to touch her at first.

Sloan gasps out loud from the touch, her eyes searching Lexie's. "What are you doing?" she asks, confused.

Lexie shakes her head, bewildered. "I don't know!" she remarks loudly. "I don't know how to deal with this; how to help you."

Sloan stares at her blankly, silent tears still streaming down her face. "You don't even like me," she insists.

Lexie panics. "That's not true."

Sloan eyes her dubiously.

Lexie sighs. "Okay, maybe it was true. Maybe I didn't like you. But I was jealous."

"Jealous?" Sloan remarks incredulously. "That's bullshit. How could you have been jealous of me?"

Lexie shrugs, trying to figure out how to put her emotions into words. "You're his daughter. His daughter. He's going to be there for you, no matter what, because that's what good dad's do, and he's trying to be a really good dad to you. He loves you unconditionally and that won't ever change. There's nothing you could possibly do to shake him. He's never going to leave you."

Sloan pauses, studying Lexie's face. "You think my dad's going to leave you?" she asks carefully.

Lexie laughs nervously, turning her head away. "I don't know. Not today. I don't know. Someday, maybe. I mean, I'm six years older than you."

Sloan laughs, rolling her eyes. "Who cares?" she remarks. "It's just that you don't seem like the type of person to follow what everyone else does. So who cares how old you are? Or how old he is? Or me?"

Lexie sighs. "I don't know. It doesn't bother me so much anymore. But one day, when the baby's born, it might...it might...."

"Bother him?" Sloan remarks. "That's crap. He doesn't care."

Lexie rolls her eyes. "That's not the point," she remembers. "The more important question is why are you crying."

Sloan throws her head back. "I got the job."

Lexie furrows a brow, confused. "But...that's great. Right?"

Sloan nods. "It's just a lot. This whole growing up thing. I mean, I have to find a day care and an apartment and god, do they even make work clothes for people as fat as me?"

Lexie laughs. She can't help herself. "They're called maternity clothes," she corrects. "Plus, the hospital has a great day care that's free for all employees and we'll help you find an apartment." She hesitates, hoping she doesn't regret her next batch of words. "Plus, there's no rush for you to move out."

"Speak for yourself," Sloan says haughtily. "If I have to wake up to another morning of the two of you making out in the kitchen, I might start sleeping in this bathtub."

It's an exaggeration, but Lexie appreciates the effort. "Well, you and the baby will have to visit. A lot. I hope you know that."

Sloan smirks. "Yeah, I guess," she replies, climbing out of the bathtub.

Lexie rises to her feet, straightening her jeans with her palms. "You're gonna be a great mother," she adds. She's not sure why, but she feels like she needs to say something else.

"Duh," Sloan jokes, grinning at Lexie as she starts for the door. "Oh and don't worry," she begins coyly. "I'm not letting the baby call you grandma."

Lexie blinks back her relief. "Oh?" she manages.

Sloan shakes her head. "Kind of lame, don't you think? I figured, Lexie would be fine."

Lexie grins. "Perfect," she agrees.


She looks around the room curiously, forehead crinkling as she struggles to open the bottle of red wine in her hand. "I know you're not going to believe me, but I kind of miss her," she grins, hands still battling with the cork.

Mark chuckles, taking the corkscrew from her and popping the top off with ease. Lexie resists the urge to stick her tongue out at him. "Me too," he agrees, filling two glasses to the brim. "I'll tell you what I won't miss though," he begins, handing her a glass.

"Oh?" she asks, smirking up at him from the couch. "What's that?"

"I won't miss having to clamp my hand over your mouth in the morning because I'm just so good that you can't control yourself."

She narrows her eyes. "Oh please," she remarks. "You yell louder than I do."

"For dramatic effect," he teases.

She slaps his arm. "Man whore," she insists.

He laughs. "And," he continues, pulling her legs across his lap as he sits. "I won't miss having to cancel naked Wednesdays."

She scoffs. "We never had naked Wednesdays."

"And now we can," he grins, kissing her quickly.

"Why Dr. Sloan, I'm beginning to think you only date me for the sex," she laughs.

He shrugs, grinning wildly.

"You're a jerk," she hisses.

"But," he goes on, smiling at her. "What I missed most when she was hear was this."

Lexie cocks an eyebrow. "Describing our sexual escapades in detail on the couch?" she mocks.

He rolls his eyes, running his free hand through her hair. "No," he insists. "Although, the nakedness is definitely a topic we'll be coming back to in a few minutes."

She rubs her bare feet against his inner thigh. "So smug," she remarks.

"What I missed most," he continues, "is coming home and just sitting here, talking to you."

She's unable to hold back her smile any longer, face softening and brightening at the meaning of his words. "You better not just be trying to get lucky," she warns him, kicking him lightly, taunting him.

He grins, flipping his body on top of hers swiftly, hand grazing the side of her face softly. "Oh, I never dreamed I would get this lucky," he tells her.

She bites back the urge to giggle, her nose scrunching and eyes closing instinctively as he kisses her sweetly. She's not sure how she knows, but for once, she feels like they're going to be okay.


First Grey's story ever published. Thoughts?