In The Garden of Earthly Delights

By Triptych

The key to all knowledge is doubt.

-Ancient Sumerian proverb

  And so it became that there was a hush in the garden of paradise after the expulsion of the first man and his woman. In the garden could be heard the rustling of trees and the gentle sound of the wind. Eventually all the animals that had hid underneath the ground or had hidden behind the trees had at last regained their composure and ventured out. For it was the seventh day and they all knew that this was the day of the lord's rest; this was the day that they could freely exchange ideas and observations without being cursed by their creator.

  The topic of the day was pretty much the expulsion of man from the garden. It was as if time had stopped prior to this event for it was the most monumental occurrence that had ever happened in paradise. The discussion was led by the owl and the tortoise; for the owl was a keen observer due to the fact that he had very large eyes and could stay hidden in the trees while the tortoise had the most patience for his movements and demeanor was both slow and deliberate.

  "Did any of you know the reason why the man and his woman were expelled from paradise?" The wise owl asked.

  A great murmur swept the crowd of animals. The horse snorted and the dog barked while the lion roared and the monkey began to howl. The owl had to make a terrific hoot in order to drown out the cacophony of sounds.

  "So no one at all saw what had happened?" The owl asked again.

  "All that we know is that the lord had cursed both the man and the woman, then he commanded them to leave." The crow said as he sat on the buffalo's shoulder.

  "But something must have caused him to do that. Both the man and the woman were the lord's favorite. They were destined to rule over us all." The owl countered.

  Again murmurs and distant arguments erupted from the crowd of animals. This then went on for an eternity until one by one the voices died down when they all realized that the tortoise had not yet spoken. As the last argumentative beast realized this, all eyes focused on the tortoise as it began the slow task of speaking.

  At long last the tortoise began to speak. "The one who would know the answer to all this is the serpent. For I had noticed it being admonished by the lord before he turned onto the man and the woman."

  The crowd began to murmur again because the serpent was not among them.

  "Very well then." The owl answered. "Let us scour the garden as well as the four rivers that surround it until we can find the serpent. For only then will our queries be satisfied."

  And so it came that all of the animals went their separate ways to look for the serpent. The horse reared and galloped across the plains while the eagle flew as high as the heavenly sky while the worm burrowed deep underneath the soft ground. But it was all for naught; it seemed that the serpent had indeed vanished without a trace. As the day wore on, each of the animals began to tire of the search and went back to their respective lairs in the garden of paradise until only two remained: the wise owl and the plodding tortoise.

  As the sounds of the search began to die down the serpent at last came out from under his hiding place and settled on top of a warm rock to rest. It was then that he heard a hoot and turned his head in time to see the owl perched up on a branch of a towering tree beside him.

  "Oh crafty snake, why have you been hiding from your friends?" The owl asked.

  "I was somewhat afraid because I have necessitated a significant change in this garden and I feared that you would all blame me for it." The serpent answered.

  "You mean the expulsion of the first man and his woman? We all know that. But we want to ask you some questions as to why it had happened." The owl countered.

  The serpent coiled around the rock as he spoke. "Very well, ask your questions."

  "Did you have anything to do with the expulsion of the man from the garden?"

  "Not at all. I neither spoke to nor even seen the man." The snake answered.

  At that moment another voice joined the discussion. "Yes that is true. But I did notice you speaking with the woman before the incident happened. Tell us about that."

  The serpent and the owl turned their heads in time to notice that the tortoise had come up beside the rock where the snake was resting. The serpent shook his head in wonder. There was no turning back now.

  The serpent began. "There were many times when the woman would approach me for we had become quite close lately. She loved the caress of my coils as it wound round her hairless body and I too loved the warmth of her torsos. As time went by she began to open up to me. She would tell me secrets about the man she called Adam; that he would sometimes slap her and beat her if she refused his advances. In time, I became her closest confidant."

  The owl and the tortoise listened intently.

  The serpent went on. "Yet despite the fact that his beatings would sometimes inflict horrific pain and suffering on her, she would lovingly forgive him. After all, she was created solely as a companion to him."

  "As I recall, she wasn't the first woman created by the lord to serve as his mate." The owl commented.

  "Yes, that is true. She was the third woman to be created for him." The serpent answered. "The first woman the lord had created was quite intolerable for the man."

  "Intolerable? Why?" The tortoise asked.

  "Because her orifices would continually secrete bodily fluids at all times. Blood and urine ran from her navel as well as constant tears from her eyes and saliva would drool from her mouth while feces would constantly spew forth her bowels. The man was unable to have any desires for her and the lord returned her unto the dust from whence she came from." The serpent explained.

  "So you mean the lord made a mistake?" The tortoise queried.

  "The first of many." The serpent said. "The second female to be created by the lord was named Lilith. In time she too became unsuitable for the man because she always preferred to be on top and in control when they would copulate. In time she had had enough of the man and left the garden. The lord cursed her for being too haughty for the man was god's favorite and he therefore decreed that all women would be subservient to Adam's needs."

  "I see. I have always believed that the two were created equal, I see that it was not the case at all." The tortoise commented.

  "No, I am afraid you are listening too much when the lord speaks and taking his words for truth without checking the actual facts yourself." The serpent chided the tortoise.

  "And what about you, crafty serpent?" The owl said. "It seems that you constantly try to contradict our creator."

  "That is in my nature. It was he who created me this way. Would he not expect any less from someone such as myself? Why would he give me the power to judge and reason with what he says and what he actually does? Unless of course that I would conclude two things: that he created me unwillingly or some higher power with which he has no control over was my actual creator." The serpent answered.

  "Your words have a certain truth to them, serpent. But they may very well be your undoing." The tortoise added.

  The serpent looked down. "Alas, your wisdom about me has become prophetic. In many ways I played a key role in the expulsion of the man and his woman from paradise."

  "Explain." The owl said.

  "Not too long ago, when I was slithering along the branches of the one tree, I overheard the lord talking to Adam and his wife. The lord gave the man and his woman dominion over all plants and animals for he was the pinnacle of the lord's creation. The lord said that they may eat from any fruit in the garden except from the one tree." The serpent explained.

  "Go on." The tortoise said as he munched on a fallen fruit from the one tree.

  "The lord told them never to eat from the one tree for they would surely die." The serpent said.

  "Surely die? That's preposterous. Every animal I know eats from the one tree as well as all of the lord's seraphim." The owl commented.

  "My thoughts exactly." The serpent answered. "So when the man left to defecate among the trees, the woman went over and took my wriggling form onto her body and asked me about it. I told her that if they eat the fruit from the one tree they would not surely die. I told them that when they eat of it their eyes will be opened and they will be like god in knowing good and evil."

  "And so she ate it." The tortoise concluded.

  "That she did. And then she also gave it to her mate when he arrived and they ended up ravishing all the fruits in the lower branches." The serpent explained.

  "I see nothing wrong with what you have done serpent." The owl said. "You simply told the truth to the woman in saying that she would not surely die. If anything the lord should have explained to the man that by eating the fruit their eyes would be opened."

  "Yes, I have wondered about that myself. Why is it that the lord continued to treat the man like a child and lie to him? Would it not have been better to tell the man the truth?" The tortoise retorted.

  "Yes. The lord is a hypocrite. He says to always forgive others and to tell the truth yet he deceives us with his lies and scares us with his threats of vengeance." The snake added.

  "My friends, I have lost any respect for this god. I hope we will be delivered from his vile tyranny some day." The owl said.

  "What happened after they ate the fruit?" The tortoise asked the serpent.

  The serpent sighed. "The lord found out about it and cursed them before banishing them from the garden. As for me, he cursed me to forever crawl along the dust and put enmity between myself and the woman."

  It was then that the serpent fell silent. An unnatural hush then came over the glade where the three animals conferred and it chilled them to their bones. They realized that the lord would soon learn of their conspiracy against his rule and they tried to warn the rest of the animals. The lord however, was quick and banished them from the gardens of paradise while placing a curse on each one of them.

  For the owl the lord cursed the bird so that it would sleep all day and be allowed to gather food only at night. The owl hooted in protest for it would starve because it would not be able to see in the darkness. For the tortoise the lord cursed it so that it would no longer be able to speak and would therefore blunder its way through eternity. As for the serpent, which was already cursed with enmity to man and to crawl forever, the lord bestowed a complete enmity between it and all other animals. From then on, the serpent would be hunted and killed by others not of its kind.

  As the three banished animals were let loose from the garden of paradise to dwell among the dreary world, the tortoise could no longer speak and left the other two, wandering aimlessly till it disappeared from their sight.

  While the owl shrieked in despair and the serpent slithered aimlessly on the ground, they were chanced upon by the dark mother herself, Lilith. Both animals explained their plight and were in turn comforted by the second woman of the lord.

  "Be not afraid little owl. You have been cursed to live only in the darkness while sleeping during the day. Don't let that stop you." With those words, Lilith blew a kiss to the owl. "I give you the gift of seeing in the night. When the vermin that crawls in the darkness ventures forth, you shall have the sight with which to hunt it."

  The owl gave a hoot of happiness as it flew off into the distance.

  Turning to the serpent and patting it on its triangular head, Lilith sung a tune. "And as for you my crafty little serpent, you have brought forth hope to mankind for that since they have partaken of the fruit from the one tree, you have sown the seeds for the lord's destruction."

  "How so?" The serpent asked.

  "You have given man the spark it needs." Lilith laughed.

  "I don't understand." The serpent intoned.

  Lilith smiled. "Remember that gods only exist because there are worshippers that fuel their existence. When the last follower of that god dies or converts to another religion, that god ceases to be. Now that you have made man aware of what is good and evil, man will create tools and other deities to better his life and soon he will have no longer any need of bloodthirsty gods with which to worship. Once the last follower of the lord is gone, peace will reign on the world at last."

  And so the dark mother held the serpent to her breast and suckled it. And for a time both lain with each other and for a brief moment, remembered and savored their pleasant memories when they once dwelt in the gardens of paradise.