Shepard breathed in deeply in anticipation as Tali moved forward towards him, her fingers moving to remove her mask. Right as her fingers touched the seals holding it in place, the comm chirped. "Uh, Commander?"
"Joker, you have ten seconds, and then you can flip a coin to decide whether Tali or I throw you out the airlock," he growled. One hand reached out to calm the woman he loved, her hands wringing in sudden nervousness.
"Sorry Commander, but Miranda and Jack are at it again. This time they're tearing up the Engineering sub-deck instead of Miranda's office." The pilot sounded far more meek and apologetic than usual, and signed off as Shepard voiced a literal growl.
He closed his eyes for a moment, taking two deep breaths to calm his anger. "Let's take care of this quickly, before they wreck the ship, and then we can get back to what we were doing."
Five minutes earlier
Jack lay on her bunk, practicing twirling her pistol idly. She'd been thinking about the Collector mission – hell, probably everyone left on board was, and even in her little nest she could tell the ship was quiet and empty. That was why it came as such a surprise when footsteps came down the stairwell. She knew it wasn't Tali – the little suit rat was up in the cabin with Shepard, she thought jealously.
Somehow, it should have surprised her more to see the Cheerleader come elegantly down the stairs with that so practiced sway and that arrogant smirk. She didn't know how Shepard could stand to talk to the ice queen day after day, though probably he was only staring at her tits. Just to be extra annoying, Jack remained silent, continuing to twirl her pistol.
Miranda stopped at the foot of the bunk, staring down at the half-nude rebel. "Do you think we're going to come back from this?" she asked without preamble.
Jack raised an eyebrow, stopping the pistol and slamming it home in the holster still on her thigh. "Probably. If anyone can pull this off, it's Shepard."
"Exactly." Miranda moved over, cocking a hip up onto one of the crates in a motion designed to draw the eye to the way the material tightened over her crotch. Jack told herself she was unimpressed. "When this is over, Tali's going to return to her fleet, one way or another."
There were a few moments of silence, and Jack finally turned up to a sitting position. "You going somewhere with this, cheerleader?" She gave a smirk of her own as a tiny flush spread across the other woman's cheeks.
"Stay out of my way while I help him get over Tali, and I swear to you Cerberus will never come after you again," she said simply, starting to turn away.
Jack's low chuckle stopped her a mere two steps away. "You got that wrong. You are going to stay out of my way, because he's going to need someone who won't lie to him."
Miranda whirled around, a fierce scowl on her face. "You'll pay for that," she said, and lashed out with one hand. After watching Samara, she'd been trying to figure out how the justicar used her biotics to inflict crippling pain, but she didn't exactly have a test subject … until now.
The biotic force hit Jack almost instantly, given the point blank range, and as she collapsed in a convulsion to her bunk, Miranda thought for a moment it was a success. Then it passed, and Jack picked her head up. "Really? Your idea of threatening me is to hit me with a biotic blast to make me cum?"
Surprised, she took a step back, shaking her head. "Wait, no, that's not –" Her protest was cut off as Jack smacked her with a biotic blast of her own. For the first moment, it was searing pain, that in an instant tripped right over the line into knee-trembling pleasure. It was enough that she didn't even notice the warp-like effect shredding her impeccable white outfit. "Really?" she gasped out once she gained enough breath, and in moments the two of them were throwing around enough biotic power to impress a squadron of Asari commandos, had any been around to watch.
In the middle of this is when Shepard came down the stairs, Tali at his heels, and stopped in open-mouthed shock as he took in the tableau of the two biotics grappling with each other, hands wreathed in dark energy, clothes shredded and the scent of sex heavy on the air. He turned briefly to Tali, who was no less shocked, but less unsure about what to do.
One hand came up, her omni-tool flaring to life, and her defense drone popped into being in front of her. "Go for the lady bits, Chikita!" The drone took a half second, and then flicked out a painful electrical zap, breaking the two sweat-soaked women apart.
"Thank you, Tali," Shepard said coldly, stepping up beside the drone and, with an immeasurable amount of willpower, managing to keep his eyes on their faces. "I don't know what started this. I don't care. But if Engineering isn't picked up in two hours,"
"Three," Tali interrupted, quietly but firmly.
"Three hours, then I'm authorizing Kasumi to give her vid recording of the whole thing to Joker." He lashed out with a hand, grabbing the cloaked thief by the arm and forcing her to return to visibility. "Got it?"
Without waiting for a response, he whirled around, wrapping one arm around Tali possessively, and returning straightaway to the elevator. Miranda and Jack simply stood there until the sound of the door above closing echoed down to them, then turned in unison to the thief. "I, ah, don't suppose there's room for me?" she asked saucily.
A moment later, the biotics left her writhing on the floor as they walked up the stairs together. "Care for a drink? I've been saving a bottle of scotch," Miranda said as they exited into the main passageway. "It's best enjoyed in comfort."
"You're on," Jack replied, then grabbed a firm handful of Miranda's butt. "Cheerleader," she purred.
