disclaimer: I do not own the characters.


The rain was coming down with a fervor. It seemed to echo his pain.

Funny.

Life had certainly lost it's meaning now that the war was over. What is there left to fight for?

The pain was unbearable. It was as if his soul had been ripped apart.

How many times had he and Fred joked about death? They had laughed even, at the absurdity of dying.

Now, when he looks back and thinks about it, he feels ashamed.

Why did it have to be Fred? God, why?

He wanted to black out, to numb the pain.

Unbearable as it was, it was a fresh slap in the face. It opened his eyes to the reality which was unavoidable.

Life itself had been a joke for them. They had thought that they could live it by joking all the time.

Now? All that was left was pain. Unbearable, mind numbing pain.

He stood there, as the water ran down his face, wishing...hoping...that the ground would swallow him up and he could join his twin in his journey.

The laughter and mischief had left his eyes, making it look haunted.

As he looked at his family from a distance, he felt helpless. How could he move on? It was not supposed to be like this. They were supposed to be happy. They were supposed to feel relieved and celebrate the end of the war. They were supposed to move on with their lives as if nothing had happened.

Now, he could barely smile let alone feel happy or relieved.

Now he knew how Harry felt. How he felt when he lost his family, his godfather,his friends. He could sympathize with him. Harry's loss was far more than his.

As he looked at Fred's grave in front of him, he vowed.

He vowed that he would do everything he could to move on.

He vowed that he would do anything within hi power to keep the joke shop that he and Fred started, running.

He vowed that he would try and be as happy as possible in his remaining life.

And, he also vowed that he would never replace the place he had in his heart for his brother. No one could take that place.

Goodbye Freddy, he thought.