Chapter 01

I do not own Soul Eater or any of the characters. All I own are my plotlines and crazy ideas.

Summary: When Kid goes on a mission with Liz and Patty, he does not expect to have to schedule an appointment to see the kishin, nor does he expect to be injured in a horrible battle during the fight. When Maka finds out that he is wounded, she does everything she can to help him and return him to normal. But how can she? Hint: it will take some heavy metal and possibly a brand new headset.

Ciao tutti! (Hey everyone!)

I am SO SORRY I haven't been able to update Soul Plague in months! The creative juices just aren't flowing right now! GOMEN! GOMEN! *bows* Luckily, my friend, Katsumi, will most likely be taking over, with me editing, so the legend will live on! *Stands on cliff side above ocean with waves crashing into rock, voice echoes* ANYWAY, me and Katsumi were talking about her fanfiction in school, and I was like you should do this _ (blanking out for sake of surprise) and she was like, yeah! That's a great idea! I'm totally using that! And then I was like, Haha, too bad, it's my idea! I'm gonna use it! And then I ran off into the hypothetical sunset, and she didn't see me until after school. THE END, ON WITH THE STORY!

(Kid's POV)

"So this is the place the kishin lives? Looks like a pediatrics center." I look over at Liz, who is standing just ahead of me in front of a building that reads, 'Smiles To Go: Family Dentistry'.

"Yes, it would appear so, as this is the address." I reply "What are we waiting for?! Let's go! KAHAHA!" Patty skips over to the door, and we quickly follow her through the glass doors. Inside the building is a waiting area, and the location of the kishin is quickly confirmed. In the waiting, area, the spirits of families play with wooden blocks and coloring books. They are all obviously dead, with puncture marks in their necks, bloody gashes around their mouths, and a few even had surgical tools stuck through their heads. I quickly noticed a correlation between the causes of death; they all seemed to be in the head.

I grab the back of Liz's shirt and walk through the mass of spirits, all the while Liz is clinging to the carpet like a cat who is about to get a bath. "No! Don't make me walk through them! They're too scary! Kid! Kid, don't make me! Ki—"

I let her go. "Liz, we're at the front already." I say flatly. "What?" she says, "Oh phew, all the ghosts are gone. No more creepy stuff for me, no sir! Not one single blasted—" She interrupted yet again when a ghostly looking pen flies through the air and knocks the magazine that she had just picked up out of her hand.

"Kyaaaa!" she screams, and tries to run out the door. I clap my hands, "Patty, guard mode." Patty barks at me, and blocks Liz from going anywhere. Good thing I took Patty to that hypnotist to cure her of her fear of giraffes. The hypnotist worked so well that I took the liberty of programming Patty for a few extra commands.

Only then do I look at what Liz was screaming about, and when I do, "KYAAAAAA!" I scream even louder than Liz had. "DA FAQ IS THAT?!" Behind the desk is one of the most disgusting creatures I've ever seen, and I've seen Blackstar plucking his eyebrows.

The creature is a half-decomposed corpse, with lidless eyes (one of which is hanging out of its socket), a huge gaping mouth with a few square shaped teeth. The thing stood up, and I saw it was naked except for a rope wrapped around it. When it turned away to pick up and sheet of paper, the only thing I could think was; Dat ass….

Of course, the next thing I thought of is that it's completely asymmetrical, and you can assume that I quickly blew it to smithereens. Then I walk with Patty and Liz down a long corridor, where we can see a door at the very end. I hate corridors; you can't trust them… I speed up and we reach the end of the corridor. I open the door, and light blinds us for a few seconds.

"Well, hello there, Kid. Your papa made an appointment with me some time ago. It seems you're a few years late, but I suppose I can squeeze you into my next time slot." I blink open my eyes, and gasp when I see our old family friend. He was our personal family dentist until he raped one of the maids, Jovita. Then father fired him, and we haven't seen him until now.

"…..Dr. Stephano?"

DUN DUN DUN! Cliffhanger! Sorry it was short, but the next chapter will be longer, I promise! I won't be able to update very often, but I will when I can. If you think this is too serious now, keep reading, cause in the next chapter or so it'll get HILARIOUS (I hope) and I'm still not telling what the hilarious thing is! You got to wait and find out! BWAHAHA- *chokes, and starts coughing* Ugh, swallowed a fly. Guess I'm a vegetarian no longer! *pulls something out of throat* oh wait, it's a piece of paper. It says, "GET ON WITH WRITINGTHE NEXT CHAPTER ALREADY! From Martin.

If any of you noticed, I included A LOT of PewDiePie references, and I don't own any of those. They belong to PewDie.

And if anyone says I can't use them well,

I DON'T CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!