Warning: This story has slight, descriptive gore you've been warned xD
NONONONONONONONONONONONO. NO. THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING. NO. HOW DID IT COME TO THIS? WHY? WHY WAS I SO SELFISH? NO! NO! I HAVE TO...911...CALL...NO! HOLD ON! HOLD ON FOR ME! PLEASE! DON'T! NOT YET!
...
Just a few moments ago...
I closed my bedroom door, crashing onto my bed, a breath escaping from my mouth as my back hit landed on the foam mattress. Combing my fingers through my hair, I slowly feel how emotionally and physically exhausted I am. All the mixed emotions in the very tense conversation earlier has all mixed up to turn into one huge ball of feelings inside my chest.
Gah! Why the fuck did I have to do that?! I feel even worse than before! I internally scream out. Real smooth, Ymir. Girl of your dreams and you leave her there...outside your door. Probably hurt, freezing, shocked and mentally unstable at the moment. Real smooth, Ymir. I growl as I put my hands over my face, rubbing it roughly. I should just go to sleep. Maybe it'll be better in the morning. I decide whilst sighing. I moved to a more comfortable spot on my bed and awaited for sleep to claim me as I close my eyes and wait for the darkness to follow soon after.
"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, YMIR?!" I shout as I jump up from my bed. "YOU LEFT KRISTA OUTSIDE OF YOUR FRONT DOOR! WHERE SHE'S PROBABLY HURT, FREEZING, SHOCKED AND MENTALLY UNSTABLE!" I quickly sprint downstairs to my front porch whilst slapping my head and calling myself an idiot continuously.
I pulled the door open, hoping to grab a certain blonde and hold her in my arms till the next day, but I was greeted by thin air. A cold wave of dread washed over me. Krista's not here. She's so fragile that she'll do anything without giving her surroundings any mind. Shit! I gotta find her!
Not bothering to put on any footwear, I ran outside scanning the area around me. Fuck. She lives west of my place doesn't she? I should start there. Turning right, I start sprinting towards the direction of the Lenz household but still keeping an eye open for a small, blonde haired figure.
I spot a flash of yellow moving quickly in front of me. Training my eyes on my target, dismissing the rest of the nocturnal crowd, I confirm that it is indeed the person I was looking for. Krista. Her eyes red and puffy from crying, making her bright, blue eyes seem very dull. From my position I can see that she still has tears running from her face. She seemed too preoccupied at the moment due to her wiping her tears off that she doesn't notice that she's nearing an intersection. Panic coursed through me replacing the adrenaline that has already been bubbling inside me ever since one hour ago.
"Krista! Stop! Stop moving!" I yell out from the top of my lungs, trying to make my voice heard over the noise of the bustling night crowd.
Krista spins her head around and finally locks her gaze unto mine. Her eyes widen in fear and starts to run away. I immediately know that she misunderstood my warnings and proceeded to escape from my sight.
Knowing that she WILL get hurt if I didn't do something, I pushed my way through the crowd, bumping into people and making them fall. But that didn't matter right now. There were things that were worth more to apologise for than a red, aching backside.
Slowly, the distance between Krista and I started to close until I finally managed to grab a hold of her hand. She started shaking her hand violently, trying to pry my grip from her wrist.
"Let me go!" she shouts, now using her left hand to try and release herself from my grasp.
"No!" I yell back. "Krista! You gotta listen t-"
"LET GO!" And with a scream she uses her body weight to free herself from my hold and starts to sprint towards the middle of a busy street.
I see a bright flash and a glint of metal approaching from the other side of the road and I immediately knew that I had to get Krista away from there. I sprint towards her yet, everything seems to be moving in slow-motion except for the truck, now recognizable due to it being so close.
Krista halts, finally seeming to know what's about to happen, turns around and starts running back towards me, her face the very definition of fear. Her mouth opened to say something. "Sor-" But, the odds were not in our favour. As she too, was also moving way too slowly.
And then as if someone had snapped their fingers, time flowed normally and then came the inevitable and sickening sound of collision. Bones cracking due to the heavy blow the truck had delivered. The sound of flesh hitting metal at a very high speed. These were the sounds that I knew, I would never get out off my head along with the sound of Krista's loud yelp as she was thrown into the air.
Waking up from my stunned stupor, I yelled out her name as loud as I can.
"KRISTA!"
I quickly got up to my feet and was already beside her in a flash. And if there was ever one thing I didn't want to see in my human life, was the scene laid out in front of me.
Krista, her body mangled and bent in different angles, her bones sticking out from places where it didn't belong. I held my hand over my mouth, trying to keep myself from vomiting and crying out loud.
"FUCK! KRISTA! NO! NO!" I yell out, my hands balled into fists, placed near her sides. "This can't be happening! NO!" Tears were now streaming down my face, uncontrollably gushing out of my eyes. "I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry," I whisper to her continuously. "If only..." I choke out the rest of the sentence, my sobbing affecting my speech.
Krista lets her gaze remain upon the sky before slowly averting it towards me. Her face was now a complete opposite of what it was just minutes ago. It was completely calm. She raised up her bloodied hand to touch my face. She opens her mouth and quietly croaks, "It's okay. It wasn't your fault. If only I listened to you instead of running away."
"No! If only I didn't kick you out! This is completely my fault! If only I wasn't so selfish then you wouldn't be lying in the streets like th-" I ramble until Krista renders me silent by putting her finger over my lips.
"Shh. I don't have much time left, Ymir. I'd like to make every second count," she whispers so quietly that even I was not sure if she ever spoke at all or if it was just an illusion. But instead of confusing myself upon deciding what was real or not, I just nodded my head and took her hand in my palm.
"Don't blame yourself, Ymir. It wasn't your fault that you were born selfish. Or maybe you weren't born like that at all. There may be a story behind it. And I would really want to hear it but maybe not now. Perhaps another time or in another life." Krista said in a hushed whisper, her eyes slightly twitching.
"There were things in this life that I wished for, Ymir. And you made most of them come true. Actually, all of them except one. My greatest wish was to spend the rest of my life with you. And I know that we could've achieved that together but, I guess it just wasn't meant to be. At least, not in this world." Krista lets out a shaky breath. Right now, I am fully aware that she's doing all she can to hold on but every attempt seems to be getting weaker. And with every attempt, my heart gets heavier.
"Just remember that what I said back then was true. Not of it was just an excuse to try and gain you back. I do love you, Ymir. I really did and I still will. And promise me, please promise me...that you'll continue to be your selfish self and that you'll live your life to the fullest. Live your life in return for the life I couldn't live. And to save you from any future pain, I can at least do this." She grabbed hold of my hand as tight as she can though her grip felt as light as a feather.
"Please forget me. And don't ever remember me. I don't want to cause you any more pain even if I'm not here. So please, Ymir. Forget me," she pleads, tears in her eyes.
I look down to the ground and chuckle slightly. "Thank, God that I'm a selfish bastard, huh, Krista? Because you know what? I'm never gonna let you go. Even if you're not with me anymore, I'll make sure you stay in my heart. You've already taken it anyways. No use in giving it up to anyone else if it already has an owner, right?"
And for the last time, Krista smiles and whispers to me, ever so slightly. "Hell yeah! Now...Ymir...I'm getting sleepy...can I close my eyes now?"
I smile, holding back all my tears. "Sure. Make sure you dream of me, alright?...I love you." I slowly lean down and capture her lips in a soft kiss.
Two kisses in a night and they were both farewell kisses, I chuckle to myself. Releasing her lips, I catch a final view of Krista. It was a rather nice scene despite her body being absolutely wrecked. Because on her face was a smile. A smile that she only used around me and whenever she felt content. And I knew, that at least she was happy. And that was good enough for me.
A/N: I KNOW THAT THIS WAS REALLY SHORT BUT HOLY FUCK THIS MADE ME CRY 7 TIMES WHILE WRITING IT. NO EXAGGERATION AND ALL BUT I ACTUALLY DID ;_; I wanted to finish this story as soon as possible because the feels were too much for me. SORRY IF YOU GUYS FOUND IT LACKING BUT I WAS REALLY RUSHING ;_; HERE. GO AND TAKE YOUR FEELS. TAKE THEM FROM ME THANK YOU.
(ps: if you did find that this unsatisfied your desires, there will be a short part 2, don't worry xD)
-yaeger
