Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone you may or may not be familiar with.

Clearly I have no self-control. There are so many ideas running through my mind which wouldn't make sense to add as a part of any of my stories so here we have a set of random one-shots. I guess I'll use this an an opportunity to practice some angst even though most stories are just going to be light-hearted and fun.

People like to leave me requests on other stories and I don't really take requests, but if you have something you want to read, this is your chance. Request away.

Enjoy! :)


Summary: She wasn't really big on birthdays, but it was her thirtieth and she had reasons to believe that her boyfriend had something special planned for her. Or did he?


Lita let out a soft sigh as she continued her drive home from work. It was a Friday evening so it was no surprise to her that she was previously stuck in traffic for half an hour and was finally moving more than five miles per hour. It was so ridiculous how crazy traffic could get on a Friday after work. Sure traffic was always bad after work, but it was a whole different level of horrible at the end of the week. The redhead was glad she was probably no more than ten minutes away from home. It had been a long week and Lita was ready for the weekend. It was really tiring working as a paralegal in a busy law firm, but the woman did love it otherwise she wouldn't be doing it.

The redheaded woman had a feeling it was going to be a great weekend; it was her birthday after all. Lita wasn't really too big on birthdays, but it was her thirtieth and she had reasons to believe that her boyfriend of four years had something planned. John had been acting very secretive and shady- he even told her that he strongly suggested she take off Monday and Tuesday- lately so Lita figured he was planning something for her birthday so she straight out told him that she didn't want a party or something where other people would be present, she just wanted the two of them to spend some time together. They were pretty busy with their careers during the week which wasn't to say that they didn't have time for one another, but she just wanted one weekend to themselves. One weekend where they wouldn't make plans with any friends or family. One weekend where they would basically ban any visitors to their apartment. One weekend where it would just be the two of them together. Hopefully John was smart enough to listen to her.

A couple of minutes later and Lita pulled up to one of the designated parking spots in the parking area of the apartment complex she and John moved in together roughly two years ago. As the woman parked her car, she noticed the man's car was occupying the parking spot right next to hers which meant he was home which wasn't surprising since he did tend to get home before she did. The redhead soon got out of the car after picking up her purse which she previously placed on the passenger's seat. After that was done, Lita headed inside the building before going up to the fifth floor where her and John's apartment was located.

Lita unlocked the door to the apartment before walking inside. She froze in place and immediately began laughing when took in the scene in the living room. The room was decorated with balloons, streamers, and a banner which read "Happy 30th Birthday." It was kind of cheesy in her mind, but she also thought it was cute.

"Such a dork," Lita muttered to herself as she turned around and locked the door.

The woman turned around again after getting her task done and placing her keys on the hook near the door. She walked more into the house so she could find where John was, but stopped when she saw something that wasn't in the living room before. Lita had to do a double take thinking that her eyes were deceiving her, but sure enough, the television was still there. Their TV stopped working a week ago and they still hadn't replaced it. Well, she guessed John went out and replaced it today. But why would John make a purchase like this without consulting her first. And more importantly, why did their new TV have a bow on it?

"John," Lita called out to her boyfriend as she placed her bag on one of the couches.

"Oh hey Li," John said as he joined her in the living room a few moments later. He walked over to the confused redhead and placed a kiss on her cheek. "I didn't hear you coming in. Happy birthday."

"Um, thanks," the redhead said as she turned her attention to the brunette. She opened her mouth to say more, but wasn't able to when the man cut her off.

"So do you like the balloons and stuff or is that too much for you."

"It's nice."

"That's good to hear, I really thought you would think it was too much, but-"

"Well, it is, but it's cute. Thank you. Did you put up this stuff by yourself?"

John shook his head. "No, Randy helped," he said, referring to his best-friend. "I couldn't bring and set up the tv by myself."

Lita nodded. "That was nice of him," she said before getting to her reason of calling John into the living room. "What is this TV doing here?"

John glanced at where Lita was before turning his attention back to her. "It's a tv, what do you think it's doing here?"

Lita rolled her eyes and shook her head. "No smartass, what... okay. Let's try it this way. Did you go out and buy a TV without consulting me about it first?" John simply nodded. "Why? John, I know it's just a TV, but I would love to know when you're planning on buying something like that."

"But why would I talk to you about a present I'm getting you for your birthday?"

Now Lita was confused. Did her boyfriend just say that he got her a TV for her birthday? A TV that they were already planning on getting because their old one just stopped working? "What?"

"Why else do you think it has a little ribbion, bow, or whatever that is on it?" John replied as he walked over to the TV and took off said object from the top of it. He walked over to his girlfriend and handed her the object. "Happy birthday."

The birthday girl didn't say anything as she simply stared at the blue bow in John's hand, not bothering to take it from him. Lita took a deep breath before looking back up at John and speaking. "Let me get this straight, you got me a TV- something we were already planning on buying- as a gift for my birthday?"

The brunette nodded like he was unsure as he tossed the bow on the coffee table nearby. "Um yea?"

"So you used my birthday present as a killing two birds with one stone kind of thing?"

"Um no?"

"So did you just wake up one day and go 'Hm, what could I get Lita for her birthday? What would she like? What would I like? What is something both of us can enjoy? Well, we do need to replace our TV and even though she doesn't really watch it, I can just say I got it for her.' Is that how the conversation that you had with yourself went?"

"Um no," John said as he walked closers to the really irritated redhead and sat down on one of the couches nearby, taking her with him. "It's just that you're a really hard person to buy something for and I didn't think the tv would be such a bad idea."

"Let me put it in perspective for you, it would be like me getting you a microwave that we needed to replace and saying it was a present for you."

John nodded. "Okay, I guess I didn't think it through. But I still don't see-" he stopped himself from saying he didn't see why this was such a problem when he saw the glare on Lita's face. "I'll return it if you want."

"No," Lita shook her head. "That would be a stupid thing to do since we did need to get a new TV and now we have one. Or I guess I can say I have one." She smirked before continuing. "You know this means that I can come and change the channel whenever you're watching some boring game or playing some lame video game and I can just remind you how it's my gift from you before you start complaining."

"That's fair, but that's also mean."

"I love being mean."

"I know, I get to be your victim everyday."

"But you love it."

"Not really," John said as he pulled Lita closer to himself, wrapping his arms around her as she cozied up against him and placed her head on his chest. "I just love you."

"Same thing."

John raised a brow. "Was that your lazy way of saying that you love me too?"

"No. Why would I lie to you by saying that?"

"There you go being mean again."

"It's my favorite thing."

"I know," was all John said as it became silent between the two before Lita spoke again.

"Just out of curiousity," she began to say as she lifted her head a bit to look up at John, "where did you find the TV?"

"Randy," John answered before he could even think about what he said. "It was a pretty good deal too. He had the TV for like two months so it's practically new. Kinda like I stole it from the store."

Lita didn't care about anything John said after the name that left his mouth. Oh, was she pissed. She lifted her head from his chest and pushed herself away from him. "You bought this TV from Randy?"

"Um, yea," John replied very confused as to why she looked angry all over again. Only this was a different type of angry and he knew he wouldn't be able to rectify this situation as fast as he did earlier when revealing the TV was her present. And of course it came back to the damn thing. Maybe just handing over some cash would've been a better idea that way she could have gotten whatever she wanted.

"This TV was in Randy's house before it found it's way to our home?" John didn't say or do anything for a moment because he was sure there was a right and wrong answer to this question and his was the wrong one. He simply nodded after a moment. "That same Randy who's married to that bitch?"

"She's not a bitch-"

"You do not want to stick up for her right now."

"Okay, then yes, the same Randy who's married to that bitch."

Lita didn't say anything for a moment as she tried to use the tactic she always used to try and be calm about a situation that really pissed her off. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before counting to ten. Only she didn't get past three as she opened her eyes again and John knew this was bad based on the glare present on her face. "What the hell is wrong with you? Did you forget to use your brain whenever you bought this piece of shit?"

"Lita-"

"I was able to get over the fact that you bought me something that we were already going to buy as a present for me, but knowing who you bought it from..." she shook her head in disbelief. "No, are you kidding me?"

"I don't see why this is a problem. I thought you were fine-"

"Again, before I found out this belonged to that bitch."

"Again, not seeing the problem."

"Of course you don't see what's wrong with this because you're a man and all men are clueless idiots! Only you shouldn't be clueless about this because it was only a few months ago that we got into a fight about this. But you know what? I'll remind you."

"I don't need-"

"Yea you do. You know I have tried so hard to get along with Maria just for you, but I just cannot do it John. She has been... everything that she has done. Why would I want something that previously belonged to her in my house? She asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding and you know I wanted to say no, but I said yes just for you. I mean, I did think that things were getting better between us, but I didn't think it was to the point that she wanted me to be a part of her wedding, but I still said yes because I knew you would like it. It was fine for the first couple of months before she went full bridezilla mode which is okay because it's her wedding and obviously she wanted it perfect. But that didn't give her any excuse to act the way she did with me."

"I know," John nodded, hoping Lita would stop with this history lesson because it wasn't something that he wanted to be reminded of, but, unfortunately for him, she was nowhere near being done.

"John, she insulted me in front of the other bridesmaids and dropped me from the wedding party in front of them and let's not forget the fact that we were in with a bunch of people staring as she yelled at me. She said I wasn't smart enough to be a lawyer, that I had to settle and be their assistant because being a waitress takes more brain than being a paralegal. I get I missed some of the meetings or whatever, but I have a career which is more important than her wedding. And then it turned into a big thing from there. How many times did she uninvite me from the wedding and invite me again before the final invite? Too much to keep track. And I swallowed my pride and went to the damn thing just for you. She's been back to being horrible to me ever since then. But this? This is something I won't do. This piece of garbage is not staying in my house and you need to get rid of it."

"Lita-"

"Just get rid of it," the woman said as she got up from the couch so she could go inside.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking about any of that. I just thought-"

"It's fine," Lita cut him off even though John knew that was far from the truth. He wasn't able to say anything else since the redhead walked away into their room. It wasn't soon after that Lots walked out the living room that he heard the door to what he believed was their bedroom slam shut.

John stayed behind in the living room on the couch as he thought about what Lita just said to him. So maybe the television was a horrible idea to get her for her birthday especially since it did previously belong to Maria who she had a strong dislike for for obvious reasons. He definitely didn't think this one through. Well, the TV wasn't the only thing John planned for Lita. It wasn't time for the other thing that he spent a month planning, but he was thinking that he should just get to it now before Lita could dwell on and get even more angry about the whole tv business which would just ruin the whole weekend. Of course Lita would jump to the conclusion that the main surprise was just a way for John to apologize and she would just ignore the fact that this wasn't something he could come up with in like five minutes.

The man got up from the couch and walked towards the bedroom. Of course the door was closed, but thankfully Lita didn't lock it so he was able to enter. John walked into the room to see that Lita was sitting on the bed, typing away on her phone. She looked up when she heard the door open and saw John walk in. She didn't say anything as she returned her attention to her phone.

"Hey," John said as he walked over to the closet and took out a couple of bags he previously packed out from there.

"Hey," Lita replied, her attention still on her phone. She was currently texting back and forth with Dawn who knew all about John's plan so she tried to keep Lita calm about the tv debacle. John could tell she was still mad about before even though she was probably going to pretend she wasn't.

John didn't say anything in response as he placed one of the bags on the empty spot on the bed which earned him Lita's attention. "Are you going somewhere?"

John nodded as he looked through the bag. "We are."

Lita arched a brow. "Oh yea? Where?"

"A cruise."

"A cruise?"

John nodded. "Mhm. A cruise to nowhere. It's like a mini cruise even though we're not actually going anywhere. There aren't like any ports of call or anything so it's like we're at a hotel, but we're on a ship. Thought it could be something new and fun."

"Oh, so you didn't tell me to take off on Monday and Tuesday just so we could watch that beautiful tv?"

John rolled his eyes as he finally found the little box he was looking for, under the piles of clothes in the carry-on bag he packed for himself. He put the box in his pocket before zipping up the bag and placing it on the floor with the other one. "I packed your bag for you as well," he said as he took a seat on the bed next to his girlfriend. "We leave tomorrow morning so you still have time to change whatever you want."

If I even want to go in the first place, Lita had to bite the bottom of her lip from saying those exact words out loud. "So was the TV a joke and is this my real present?"

"Well, I guess you can say it was in a way because I wanted to throw you off, but also no. Like, in addition to. I realize the TV was a bad idea and I could have done without it, but it happened and there's nothing else I can do about it now-"

"Except for taking it back," Lita chimed in.

John nodded. "True. Point is, I really am sorry about that."

"Okay," was all Lita said as she continued clicking away on her phone. "By the way, I'm going on a little online shopping spree courtesy of your credit card. Dawn said I shouldn't get too carried away, but she's acting like a total hypocrite. I really do like these jeans-" she stopped herself from saying more when John took he phone out of her hands and placed it on the other side of the bed which earned him what felt like the billionth glare of the past hour. "Um, excuse me? What is your problem?"

"Don't you think you're overacting a little?"

Lita shrugged. "Maybe I am, but I don't care." She continued after stretching her hand out to John. "Give me my phone back so I can spend your money." John rolled his eyes as he took the box out of his pocket and placed that in Lita's hand and not the phone she was asking for. Lita simply stared at the box for a while, not knowing what to say. Was she just seeing this or was this really what she thought it was? "What's this?" Lita asked as she looked away from the object in her hand and up at her boyfriend.

"Why don't you open it and see," John said in response.

"John-"

"Just open it."

Lita shook her head. "I don't... I don't think I want to."

"You scared? Nothing is going to jump out at you."

"John-" whatever she was about to say was cut short when the man took the small box out of her hand and opened the lid to reveal the ring inside which resulted in the redhead to widen her eyes and gasp in shock even though she already had a feeling the box held a ring inside."

"I had something planned out for the cruise, but I kind of don't want to wait until then. I don't want you any more angry then you already are when we go on the trip so here it goes." He took a deep breath before he continued, or tried to. "Um, what are you doing?" He asked as he watched Lita take the ring out of the box and examine it.

"This is for me, right?"

"Um yea," John slowly nodded like he was unsure of what he just said.

"Great," Lita smiled as she slipped the ring on her ring finger. "I'm just taking what's rightfully mine."

John didn't say anything because he was confused by everything that was going on. He was really confused by her dismeanor. "So um, does this mean we're getting married?"

Lita shrugged, turning her attention back to her boyfriend or maybe he was her fiancé now. "I don't know. You didn't really ask me anything now did you?"

"I guess I didn't."

Lita waited for John to say something, but when he stayed silent, she spoke up. "So?"

"This is weird."

"Yea well, you did this to yourself and I'm waiting."

"Lita, you wanna do this thing or no?" He couldn't help but laugh at the look on the redheads face. Maybe it would be best for him not to make any stupid jokes at the moment, he was already treading in dangerous waters. "Sorry," he said as he quickly sobered up. "Um, Lita, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?" He couldn't help himself and her reaction made it worth it.

Lita scrunched her nose in disgust. "You obviously don't want to marry me because you aren't taking this seriously."

John had to fight the urge to roll his eyes. "Lita, regardless of how crazy you make me, I still want to marry you. Will you marry me?"

"Well, you're still a smartass. Regardless, we'll see how fast you can get rid of that trash that I know is still in my living room."

The brunette waited for the redhead to continue, but she didn't. Instead, she leaned over John and grabbed her phone from his side. "So um, should I take that as a yes?"

"I don't know," Lita began to as she dialed an all to familiar number on her phone and brought the phone to her ear. "Is the infested television still inside my living room?" John let out a tired sigh, but didn't say anything as he got up from the bed. "And I'm going to take that as yes," she said before she heard a voice speak on the other end. "You knew, didn't you?"

John knew Lita was most likely talking to Dawn so he didn't say anything as he began to leave the room so he could go back to the living room and try to see how he could get rid of the television himself. He was almost out the room when he felt a hand in his arm. He turned around and saw a smiling redhead which was definitely something he didn't think he was going to see anytime soon.

Before John could say anything, Lita hugged him and kissed him, "I love you so much," before walking back over to where she came from. John was really taken aback by her sudden change in mood even though he was used to it. He didn't say anything as he turned around and began to leave, not without hearing some last words from who he was sure was now his fiancé. "I already told him that I'm not marrying him unless he gives back that lame ass tv back like right now. Did you know about the TV as well? Why didn't you stop him?" She paused for a moment so she could turn her attention to John's retreating form. "And I'm still pissed off they got married before us," Lita called out to him.

John rolled his eyes as he walked out of the room and to the living room. This whole proposal was really weird and he only really had himself to blame even though he thought Lita overreacted at the sight of the television. Whatever the case, he was now stuck with the task of getting rid of it and he didn't know how he was going to do that. He could always call Randy and tell him that Lita hated the present and he needed his truck so he could give it back to him and hoped that he would get his money back. It wasn't like the animosity between Maria and Lita was a secret which made it worse that he thought that it would be acceptable for him to even bring the thing inside the house.

He knew for sure that Lita was never going to let him live this birthday present thing down even though he was sure she was now going to get over it quickly. Sure, she would give him a hard time for the way the proposal went down, but he knew he had it coming with how he dropped the ball. He was definitely questioning his sanity of marrying Lita, but he knew he would get over that soon as well. He just had to get rid of this damn tv before they could properly celebrate.


Thanks for reading. Hope you liked the first ome-shot. This will have a part to follow, but I'm not really making a series out of it. Let me know what you think, please and thanks. :)