A/N: So this is the final chapter of a story I was writing a while ago. I had planned it to be a tale of Mother Gothel's extraordinarily long life; I had lots of ideas but unfortunately family life took a bit of a turn and I couldn't commit myself to the project, so it got shelved. However I had written out quite a lot of it, including the final chapter, (which is what you're about to read) so I edited it and turned it into a one-shot; hope you don't find it too tedious. ^_^;
WARNING: THIS FIC MAY CONTAIN TRIGGERS DUE TO THE MAIN CHARACTERS' GENERAL ATTITUDE OF DESPAIR AND HOPELESSNESS. IF YOU THINK THIS MAY AFFECT YOU THEN I WOULD RECOMMEND STOPPING HERE. :)
A FRAGMENT IN TIME
Possessions dwindle: I mourn their loss. But I mourn the loss of time much more, for anyone can save his purse, but none can win back lost time. ~ Latin Proverb
Time.
It's a funny thing, isn't it? Do a job that's mundane or unpleasant and it slows down to unbelievable levels. Do a task that's engaging and enjoyable, and it disappears before you even realize it's started. Time, Gothel thought, was definitely the wrong way round.
Like now.
Such a fall, even from an impressive height like that of the tower, should have taken no more than a minute. But there was no way it could have been just a minute. Too many thoughts and images raced through her mind to have fitted into a mere sixty seconds.
It had been realization that hit her first; the moment she had stumbled back and over the window ledge. It was as if the jolt had shifted everything into focus; as if she'd been looking into a cracked mirror for years before having it mended, and only then truly seeing herself for the first time. The bitterness, the hatred, the sheer spitefulness that had crept into her personality and tainted her thoughts suddenly vanished.
She wasn't 'Mother Gothel'.
She was Isobel Aravena; the eldest daughter of a poor farmhand and his wife.
What had she done?
She had killed a man; stabbed him through the heart without so much as flinching. She had murdered the man her Rapunzel loved; her foster daughter, the only person that had kept her from going completely over the edge these last eighteen years; the only person left in the world who loved her. Why had she done it?
May you never know tears, my precious flower.
The words she had spoken to her foster daughter all those years ago, back when Rapunzel was tiny, barely even walking. She had truly meant it; and now she was the cause of those tears.
Isobel had had more chances at life than most, thanks to the charms of the sacred flower; yet each attempt had seemed more of a failure than the last, to her mind, at least. What had she achieved? She was only proud of one thing; and that was Rapunzel. There were a thousand memories she had locked up in her mind; some had grown weak with age, but as with anyone, it was the worst ones that still stood out, fresh as if they were created yesterday. They drifted through her mind; things she had never confided to anyone, not even Rapunzel; they were things that would have shocked the headstrong yet innocent young girl she had come to regard as her own flesh and blood. Some of the memories she had tried to suppress still tried to force their way to the surface; the ones that had always kept her awake at night.
What would you think of me, Flower, Gothel thought, as the ground came ever nearer, if you knew the truth about me? About some of the things I've done?
She had indirectly murdered her brother...she was unable to produce the child her only husband had wanted...She had barely escaped a witchcraft trial with her life. It was hardly a list to be awed.
Then there was Thomasina.
Despite the fact that her body was fading, crumbling beneath her very being, Isobel felt a tear slip down her cheek.
Before Rapunzel, before any of the events that had changed her from that innocent young girl into the bitter woman she was today, there had been Thomasina; her real child, her only child, who had only lived a few short hours before her precious life had come to an end. She had been the product of Isobel's only marriage; and the only other event in her life that she hadn't regretted, however short her time on earth had been.
In Isobel's final attempt at life – though at the time, of course, she hadn't known it would be the last - what had she done but stolen another woman's child. She had succeeded in making another woman's life as miserable as her own. It mattered not whether she was the queen or a poor beggar; Isobel had denied her the chance of raising her own offspring.
She had gotten so many things wrong.
God would not forgive her for such atrocities.
Thomas – the brother she had lost. If there really was some kind of afterlife, would he be waiting for her? Would he even want to know the sister who had caused others so much pain, so much heartbreak?
Tears streamed into the wind.
Mama; Papa. Will you forgive me?
Thomasina. You lived for a few short hours. Will you even know your Mama now she is finally coming to be with you?
Isobel's vision faded in and out as her body closed down. The top of the tower, getting further away, shifted between colour and grey.
Rapunzel, my darling. I'm sorry. I've waited too long. I should have told you just how much I really truly love y-
END
NOTES: I chose to address Gothel as Isobel – the name I chose for her in the original fic – to make her character a little more personal, at least to me. I always thought Gothel was a great villain, especially as you could sort of see her getting more and more insane throughout the movie, and I always wondered what she'd have been like as a young woman.
