Mitchie Needs Comfort
This is sort of like a sequel to Mitchie Loves Hugs. I've got a few others planned to follow on from this one as well... so they should be written up soon. I only quickly proofread this so sorry if i missed any spelling mistakes.
Summary: Companion piece to Mitchie Loves Hugs. Mitchie always feels like she has to be the strongest person. She doesn't let anyone see her cry because then people will be seeing her when she is at her weakest point. Can Shane help her?
Disclaimer: I do not own anything
Mitchie was always trying to be strong for everyone. Because of this, she was able to hide away her problems before people could see that something was wrong with her.
When Mitchie was a young girl, her parents had allowed her and her brother to get a dog. Mitchie's brother had let her choose the breed while he chose the name. Melody was the name that was chosen. All of Mitchie's earlier friends had loved Melody. Mitchie was 17 when Melody had died. She had told everyone that her parents had sent her to live with her grandparents in the country and no one questioned that. That was the first time that Mitchie was able to hide away her feelings. She didn't need everyone to see her at her weakest point. She needed to stay strong for everyone.
When Mitchie had failed one of her tests, she kept is quiet as to how disappointed she was with herself. Her friends saw that she was a little but upset but no one ever knew just how much it had upset Mitchie. No one knew that Mitchie had retaken the test and ended up with results not much better than the first time. Everyone only thought that Mitchie was overworking herself with work and school. No one knew the real reason behind the distractions in Mitchie's life. No one knew that Mitchie was still battling issues with her self confidence and that she was actually worth something. Whispered in the corridors were getting to Mitchie and she started to believe them, causing her grades to slip. She did eventually manage to get out of this rut and get herself back on track, but that little voice was still in the back of her head. She didn't cry and forced her body not to when she was lying in her bed late at night, thoughts overwhelming her.
A few years after Mitchie had been dating Shane, Mitchie's brother had fallen ill with cancer. All of her friends knew this and tried to offer their comfort to Mitchie. They could only watch helplessly as Mitchie seemed to go into shock and drown herself in her schoolwork, trying to pretend that this all wasn't real. Her friends would grow worried when they would see Mitchie, not having slept or eating properly.
"We just want to help you Mitchie" Caitlyn would say, trying to get through. Mitchie forced a smile on her face.
"I'm perfectly fine" she would answer before turning back to her schoolwork.
"I don't know what to do anymore" Caitlyn would say to the others as they watched Mitchie slowly slip away. "She won't talk to anyone. She's keeping everything inside" The boys would all smile sympathetically at her, neither one knowing how to get Mitchie to talk to them.
Shane would become the most worried as he noticed that she wasn't as cheery as before. Her face wouldn't light up in a smile and her eyes were a dull brown instead of a sparkling brown.
"All you can do is be there for her Shane" Connie had told him one night while he was waiting to take Mitchie out to dinner. After 6 months, Mitchie's brother had gone into remission and everyone could see that Mitchie was getting back to her old self.
Mitchie's parents worried about Mitchie. They could see that she was trying to stay strong in front of her friends. They knew that Mitchie hated to seem weak but they also knew that holding everything in was not good. They would hear Mitchie cry herself to sleep because the stress was so overwhelming and Mitchie couldn't deal with it. They were waiting for the day when Mitchie would break down and finally let everything out. Finally let people find out more about her life. Finally know that Mitchie could trust Shane with everything she had.
Mitchie and Shane had now been married for a little over a year. Mitchie still hadn't been able to open up fully to people as she hated being seen as weak. She needed to be strong for everyone else.
It was another quiet night. Mitchie was reading a book and leaning against Shane while he had his notebook with him and was working on some new song material. The phone ringing cut through the silence. Both Shane and Mitchie groaned before Mitchie reached forward and grabbed the phone that was lying at her feet.
"Hello?"
"Mitchie?" her mother's frantic voice came through the phone. This perked Mitchie up. She sat up straighter.
"What's wrong mom?"
"Your dad..... He's been....he's been in an accident"
"He's what?!" she asked. Mitchie could feel Shane sit up behind her and place his hands on her shoulders.
"He was driving home from work and some.....drunk.....driver slammed his car off the road" Connie managed to get out. Mitchie sat frozen in shock. She didn't hear anything her mom said after that.
Shane could see that Mitchie had gone silent so he gently took the phone from her.
"Connie?" he asked.
"Shane, please, bring Mitchie down to the hospital now" Connie said to him.
"What's happened?" Shane asked, moving away from Mitchie so as not to distress her even more.
"Steve has been in an accident and they're not sure if he is going to make it" Connie said in a shaky voice.
"We'll be right there" Shane said. Just as he was about to hang up, he heard Connie calling out his name.
"Shane!"
"Yea?"
"Please make sure that Mitchie doesn't keep this all bottled in again. I don't want her to beat herself up over this. You know that she hates it when people see her cry. She sees it as a sign of weakness. Please try and get through the barrier" Connie pleaded with him. Shane sighed and looked over at his wife. He knew that she hated to be seen as the weak one. He knew that she was always trying to stay strong for everyone else. He knew that she hated talking about what was bothering her.
"I'll do my best" Shane said before he hung up the phone. He grabbed his keys and jacket and both his and Mitchie's phone. He walked over to Mitchie who was still sitting in the same spot. He was a little surprised to see that her eyes were watering a little but he didn't say anything about that.
"Ready to go Mitch?" Shane asked, extending his hand out to her. Mitchie snapped out of her trance and looked up at Shane. She gave him a watery smile before taking the hand that was extended out to her. Shane was surprised by how tight her grip was. He looked at Mitchie, raising his hand and brushing some of her hair out of her face. Mitchie suddenly latched herself onto him in a tight hug. Shane staggered back a few feet but right now, even under the circumstances, he couldn't be happier. Mitchie seemed to be slowly breaking the barriers she had put up around herself to block out the pain. Shane tightened his hold on her and kissed the top of her head. Mitchie suddenly pulled back and ran a hand through her hair. Shane could barely see the tears that had leaked out of her eyes but Mitchie obviously didn't want him to know.
"Let's go" was all she said. Shane wrapped his arm over her shoulders as they walked out to the car.
As they were on their way, Shane had called up Nate, Caitlyn, Jason and Tess and told them to meet at the hospital. All the way there, Shane would keep glancing at Mitchie to see if there was some sort of change. But as usual, Mitchie seemed to have bottled it all up.
All too soon for Mitchie they had arrived at the hospital. Slowly Mitchie got out of the car and wrapped her arms around herself. Last time she had been here was when her brother had cancer and that had been one of the difficult times for her. She didn't want everyone to know just how vulnerable she had felt then. She didn't need everyone to see her as a weak person when everyone knew her as someone strong.
"You coming Mitchie?" Shane's voice asked, cutting through her thoughts. She nodded as she caught up with Shane. Together they walked up to the building and walked through the front doors. Mitchie slowed down a little bit while Shane walked up to the receptionist desk.
"Can you please tell me where Steve Torres is please?" Shane asked. The nurse behind the desk looked up at Shane.
"We've been expecting you Mr Grey" the nurse said with a smile. "He's down the hall to the right. Room 204"
"Thanks" Shane said as he walked back over to Mitchie. He noticed that she seemed to be in a sort of trance again.
"Mitchie?" he asked. He watched as he jumped at his voice and turned to look at him with dead eyes. "This way" he said softly as he took her hand and started to lead her down the hallway.
As Shane pulled her along, Mitchie willed her feet to move. She didn't know what to do. Didn't know what she would do when she would actually see her dad. She knew that one look and she would break down. Break down and let everything out that she had been holding in for all of her life. She knew that if that happened, everyone would see her at her weakest point; Shane would see her at her weakest. As they arrived at the door, Mitchie started to feel nervous. How could she go in there and see her father lying helpless like that?
"Hey guys" Shane suddenly said. Mitchie looked up and saw that the rest of the gang were sitting in front of the door, waiting for them. This now only made Mitchie more nervous. What would she do if she broke down in front of all her friends? If she did, it was going to be bad enough that it was in front of Shane but in front of the whole group? That was a lot worse.
"Hey" Caitlyn said as she stood up from her chair and walked over to them.
"Hi" Mitchie managed to get out. Mitchie missed the looks that the group gave each other as she looked at the door that separated her from her dad.
Shane quietly moved away from Mitchie and over to the others.
"How is she holding up?" Tess asked. Shane sighed and ran a hand through his hair.
"I don't really know this time. Before we left, she gave me a really tight hug, like she was afraid I was going to disappear. She even had a small trace of tears in her eyes"
"You think she is finally going to break?" Caitlyn asked, sneaking a glance at Mitchie who had now seated herself in a chair.
"Maybe" Shane answered. "You know Mitchie. She hates being seen as weak"
"She also needs to know that it's human to feel emotions as well" Tess said in a worried tone.
"Mitchie is also stubborn" Caitlyn said.
"How about we just take her in to see her dad and then we'll see what we can do" Shane said to everyone. They all nodded while Shane walked back over to Mitchie. He really wanted to be able to break through Mitchie's barriers and show her that it was okay for her to seem vulnerable around him. It more so made him feel like it was his job to protect her during that time. He was prepared for anything that she might say out of anger, knowing that she would eventually be releasing everything that she had been holding since she was a young teenager.
Mitchie saw Shane walking towards her and stood up. Shane smiled at her before opening his arms for a hug. Mitchie managed a small smile before stepping into the embrace.
"You're going to be fine" he whispered in her ear. Shane didn't notice, but a little more of Mitchie's wall had broken down as Mitchie clutched tighter to him. Mitchie took a deep breath before she moved away slightly and looked up at Shane. Shane looked down at her and kissed her on her nose.
"Let's go" he said. He started to walk forward but was stopped when Mitchie wouldn't move. "Mitchie?" he questioned, moving back towards her. The other watched on silently, wondering what was going to happen. "What's wrong?" Mitchie shook her head, tears beginning to gather in her ears.
"I can't go in there" she whispered.
"What?" Shane asked, not having heard her properly.
"I can't go in there Shane, and see him like that" Mitchie said louder.
"Why not?" Shane questioned carefully, knowing that Mitchie was about to break at any moment.
"Because! I'm not supposed to go in there and see my father fighting for his life while I'm out here pretending like everything is okay!" Mitchie said, yanking her hand out of Shane's grip. She furiously wiped away the tears that were now leaking out of her eyes.
"It's okay to cry Mitchie" Shane said. Mitchie shook her head.
"No its not! If I cry, my dad is going to think that I'm not strong enough for him! I want to be strong for him Shane! I can't be some weak daughter who can't do anything! I have to be there for my mom because she is going to need me! You don't know what it's like to be the only daughter of a struggling family!" Mitchie screamed, finally letting all her years of pent up anger out on Shane, and the thing is that Shane didn't mind. He wanted this to happen. He wanted Mitchie to get angry and scream. He wanted Mitchie to break down. He wanted Mitchie to break down so that he would be able to hold her and that she would know that he was going to be there for her. That he wasn't going to care if she was weak or strong, just as long as she was Mitchie. Mitchie, who allowed him to see her at her best as worst. Caitlyn and Tess looked at each other and didn't know whether to smile or not. They wanted Mitchie to break down but they didn't want Mitchie to have to recall all of her painful memories. They left it up to Shane though. He knew what he was doing.
"You don't know what it's like Shane. Having to be strong for your brother while he goes through cancer while your parents can't seem to do anything right! To know that if something bad happens to your family that everyone in the street pities you and everyone thinks that you need all the help that you can get! I can't go into that room because I know that one look at my dad, I will cry and my dad doesn't need me crying right now. He needs me to be strong so that I can help mum get through this. I need to be the one that can comfort mom. I need to be able to help keep everything in shape so that she doesn't have too much to deal with. I can't go in there" Mitchie said as she started to back away. Her eyes were now blotchy and red. "I can't go in there" Mitchie whispered as more tears started to come. Mitchie turned around and started to walk away but a hand on her wrist stopped her and turned her back around. She crashed into someone's chest and she knew exactly who it was.
"Let me go!" Mitchie screamed as she used her free hand to slap Shane's chest. Shane only tightened his hold on her wrist while his other hand grabbed her other hand. "Let me go! I hate you! Let me go!" Mitchie screamed again. She kept trying to pull herself away but Shane was too strong. "Let me go" she whispered before collapsing into heavy sobs. Her knees gave out under her and she started to fall. Shane went down with her and cradled her in his lap and she finally let out the tears and anger she had been holding in. Shane moved over a little bit until he was resting against the wall. He released his grip on Mitchie's wrist and started to rub her back while he hugged her closely. He looked up and saw that Caitlyn and Tess had tears in their eyes while they guys had sad smiles on their faces. No one really wanted to see their friend break down but they knew that Mitchie had to.
"Shane?" a new voice asked quietly. All heads except Mitchie looked up to see Connie standing in the doorway, staring down at Shane and Mitchie. Shane said nothing but simply smiled and nodded his head at her.
"Do you want to bring her in now and then you can take her to get some rest?" Connie asked. Shane looked down at Mitchie and saw that her sobs had now calmed down.
"Yea. We'll be in ,in a minute" Shane said to Connie. Connie nodded her head and went back into the room.
"Mitchie, sweetie? Shane quietly asked.
"Yea?" Mitchie asked tiredly.
"Would you like to go and see your dad quickly?" he asked as he pushed some of her hair out of her eyes. He felt Mitchie nod against his chest. Very easily was Shane able to scoop Mitchie up and place her on her feet. He wrapped his arms around her and led her into the room.
"We'll wait out here" Nate said as he sat down next to Caitlyn. Shane nodded and walked into the room behind Mitchie.
"That was really sad to watch" Tess commented once the door had closed. The other three nodded.
"It was but Mitchie really needed it. Shane was so calm through it all" Jason said.
"I can't believe that Mitchie screamed out that she hated Shane" Nate said after a minute.
"Shane didn't even seem fazed by it. I think he was expecting her to lash out at him" Tess said as she snuggled into Jason's side.
"Well it's all been done now. Would anyone like a coffee?" Caitlyn asked as she stood up. Nate nodded while Tess and Jason shook their heads.
"I'll be back soon" Caitlyn said as she grabbed her purse and headed down the hallway.
Mitchie wrapped her jacket tighter around her as she waiting for Shane to finish talking to her mom. She curled up on the chair and rested her head on the wall. Mitchie felt incredibly guilty for screaming at Shane. He didn't deserve that. All he had been doing was trying to help her. A hand on her head frightened her. She looked up to see Shane standing over her.
"You okay?" he asked gently as he took the seat next to her. Mitchie turned her head away and looked out the window. She felt Shane's hand running up and down her back. She didn't deserve this. She didn't deserve for Shane to be comforting her, after what she had yelled at him. She shook his hand off and stood up, walking away. She walked over to another window and rested against the wall as she looked out. She heard footsteps behind her.
"What's wrong baby?" he asked once he was close enough to her.
"Stop being so nice to me Shane. I don't deserve this" Mitchie said as she continued to look out the window. Neither noticed that Caitlyn and Tess who were passing by had stopped to see what was wrong with Mitchie.
"What do you mean?" Shane asked as he placed his hands on Mitchie's waist and turned her around to face him. Mitchie refused to look at his face.
"I don't deserve you being so nice to me Shane, after the way I treated you before" Mitchie mumbled. Shane sighed and placed two fingers under Mitchie's chin to make her look at him.
"Don't be sorry for that Mitchie. I knew what I was getting myself into when I pushed you before. I wanted you to scream out at me. I wanted you to get angry" Shane said.
"I said I hated you Shane. I'm surprised you haven't run away from me already"
"Mitchie, I don't care about what was said before. You were angry and I understand that. I don't care what you said to me just as long you let out all your anger"
"I am so sorry" Mitchie mumbled as she leaned forward to hug Shane. Shane gladly returned the hug as he pressed a kiss to his forehead.
"Don't be sorry. You and I both know that you don't mean that. I just want you to know that I'm here for you. I want you to come to me when you have any problems or worries. I want you to get angry at me if you have to, so that you can let out everything that is bothering you. It's okay to cry Mitchie. Crying isn't a sign of weakness. It just shows us that we're not all perfect. We all have faults. I want to be able to comfort you Mitchie" Shane said to her as he rested his head on top of hers. Caitlyn and Tess smiled to each other as they continued to walk down the hallway.
"I love you so much Shane" Mitchie whispered.
"I love you too Mitch. What do you say we head home now?"
"I'd like that. I'm so tired"
"How about we pick up some dinner and movies on the way home and we spend the rest of the night in bed?" Shane asked as they began to walk back through the hospital towards the front.
"That sounds like a good plan" Mitchie said to him as she rested her head on his shoulder. Shane kissed her forehead as they walked out of the hospital.
That night Shane and Mitchie lay cuddled up in bed. The movie was playing in the background while the both of them ended up talking instead of watching the movie. Mitchie told Shane about everything she was thinking when her brother had first been diagnosed. Shane listened intently throughout the whole thing. Mitchie felt a lot better after talking about everything. She now knew that she didn't always have to be the strong person. Being worried about someone did not make her weak. Shane was there now to stand by Mitchie through everything she went through and Mitchie was there for Shane. Shane was right there for Mitchie when her father had died a few days later in hospital. Mitchie had cried and Shane never left her side that night. Connie could see an improvement in Mitchie. She seemed so much happier and lighter now that she wasn't carrying everything on her shoulders. Mitchie and Shane had learnt to communicate with each other more. Because of this, their relationship was as strong as ever. Maybe it was strong enough for Mitchie and Shane to start a family.
Yay...lol. This is a really long one. I hope you liked it. I know its more on the sad side... but yea... i just ran with my thoughts.
please review for me :D
