Author's Note: This one takes place a few months after "The Proper Care and Feeding." I have decided to work my way through a long list of cliches, one or two at a time, whenever I hit a slump in my other fics. Maria is obviously over 18 in this.

What the CCTV Saw

After two hours of the steady thump of the train and the numbing blur of field after field streaking past the window, Maria had finally fallen asleep, albeit slumped fitfully against her seat. Already stretched past its intended endurance, her shirt had ridden up during her struggle to find a comfortable position.

From the seat next to her, Sarah Jane had stared continuously at the inch or so of taut skin this revealed for longer than she cared to admit before finally working up the nerve to lay her fingers hesitantly against it. Her gaze shifted from her hand to Maria's face, carefully checking for any signs that she was about to wake up. As she brushed a soft arc against deceptively familiar skin, something bumped against her fingers and she watched in shock as Maria's abdomen visibly rolled beneath her touch.

"Huhmm . . ."

Sarah Jane jerked her hand away guiltily as Maria's eyes blinked open to stare down at her swollen middle.

"Ewww."

Good, Sarah Jane thought. That made two of them who found the experience more sick-making than awe-inspiring.


She really could have done without Captain Jack Harkness's lewd humor at this particular moment.

It simply wasn't a laughing matter. Maria's life was in danger. There was a less-than-lovely Nostrovite couple out there somewhere who wanted their offspring back—even if they had to tear Maria apart to get it.

Yet there he stood, looking smug and overly amused.

She'd be the first to admit that it looked out of sorts. She had come dragging her—well, she hadn't found a term that she was quite satisfied with yet—her Maria behind her—Maria who currently looked to be about 9 months pregnant—all the way from London.

They'd been left with three options: having Martha perform a painful surgery to extract the egg, letting the mother "extract" her offspring the way Nostrovite nature intended, or seeking Torchwood's help in Cardiff. Facing Jack's gloating was certainly the least of the three evils, irritating as it might be.

"And you couldn't even be bothered to drop us an email, let us in on your good news?"

She really wished he'd let it go.


"Nostrovite bite?" Dr. Knight asked. Anna Knight had been Torchwood Three's medical officer since Martha Jones returned to U.N.I.T. She still somehow looked a bit out of place in the dark recesses of the Hub.

Maria pulled over the collar of her shirt to reveal a large bandage on her shoulder.

The sight of faint red seeping through was enough to make Sarah Jane feel sick again.

"Oh," Gwen grimaced. "Sorry, love. That's the worst."

"Not you too?" Somehow it was reassuring to know that she wasn't the only one to ever suffer through this.

Gwen nodded. "Wedding day. Out to here." She made a sweeping motion indicating impossibly that her stomach had been distended at least two feet.

"Ouch." Perhaps not too reassuring. Maria's hand rubbed across her own prominent bump.

And not for the first time today, Sarah Jane wished she'd quit doing that.

"Don't worry," Anna reassured. "Bit of a buzz from the singularity scalpel and you'll be all sorted."


Ianto Jones had ushered them into the lounge where two steaming cups of tea waited on the table. Ten minutes later the tea was still untouched. Sarah Jane gave up fidgeting with a piece of frayed fabric from the sofa where she was sitting to study Maria as she paced and rubbed absently at her back. She looked exhausted—the dark circles that had formed under her eyes only accentuated that she was paler than usual.

Still she seemed to be holding up remarkably well for someone who had survived a potentially deadly alien attack less than 24 hours ago and who was now being used as a human incubator.

Maria Jackson was remarkable—in so many ways.

"Let me."

Maria gladly dropped her hands to her sides as Sarah Jane's fingers slid beneath her shirt and kneaded into her lower back. When those fingers found just the spot and worried the ache until it dulled, she let her head fall back.

The contented hum that came unconsciously from Maria was one that Sarah Jane had grown more than a little fond of over the last few months, one she felt called for the press of her lips to Maria's jaw.

"Better?"

"Yes, but don't you dare stop."

Someone coughed behind them.

They turned to meet Jack's approving grin and Anna's bemused smirk. Anna held out what amounted to surgical scrubs. "Come down to the theatre with me, Maria, and get changed while I set up."


"Just when I thought you couldn't get any more attractive, you go and--"

The angry parting of Sarah Jane's mouth made Jack stop before he finished voicing that thought.

"So I see the amorpolytemporium worked."

Sarah Jane's eyes widened to match her mouth.

"How did you know--"

There was that damned cocky grin again.

"You?" Why would he—

"Not quite."

That meant . . . Of course.

To be honest, she had suspected. But then she had thought that surely not even the Doctor would have been such a busybody, and such a pervy busybody at that.

"What was he playing at? He could have killed us."

"Well, in all fairness, there have only been a handful of reported deaths—still, what a way to go, huh?"

Sarah Jane ignored his insinuation but felt herself start to flush just the same. It had been very—very wow. And that was well after the effects of the amorpolytemporium had worn off.

She cleared her throat as Jack just barely stifled a giggle. "And you came to be involved in his daft scheme how?"

"Let's just say that we made a deal. And that he cheats at hide-and-seek."

"So do you," Ianto called from his desk.

"But you love it."

"I doubt I want to know what you're really talking about."

He leaned far closer to her than was quite proper. "You're more than welcome to stick around tonight and we'll show you."

"Thank you, Captain. But no."


"Why doesn't Martha or Harry have one of these at HQ?" Maria asked from her prone position, watching as Anna calibrated the singularity scalpel.

"Can't give away all our best toys, now can we?" she teased. "One more adjustment." More fiddling with dials. "Right. Ready?"

Maria nodded then smiled reassuringly up at Sarah Jane who was hovering beside the bed, looking positively ashen.

Anna cast a wary glance at Sarah Jane. "You might want to stand back a bit."

"Why?" she asked in alarm. Martha had assured them that the Torchwood team's device was the safest option.

"Well, sometimes—" Gwen began.

"What?"

For someone who never panicked, Sarah Jane sounded dangerously close to it.

Gwen pulled her back by the elbow.

"Hardly ever anymore—" Jack added at her other side.

There was a loud hum and a pop of discharged energy. And then it was over.

All eyes fixed curiously on the pulsing green mass that had materialized in the metal tray next to the bed.

So that was what had been squatting inside her. To Maria it looked like an overgrown cocoon—certainly not very endearing.

Sarah Jane shrugged out of Gwen's grasp and leaned anxiously over Maria. She trailed her thumb along her still sallow cheek and whispered hoarsely, "Okay?"

"Think so." Maria ran a hand gingerly down her now flat abdomen and felt an uncomfortable twinge.

"Few days rest and you'll be fine," Anna explained. She lifted the tray containing the Nostrovite egg and turned towards Jack and Gwen. "Someone want to deal with this?"

"No." Maria propped herself up on her elbows and shook her head vehemently. "Absolutely not."

The Torchwood team looked at her like she'd grown a second head—it was a look they had perfected from experience.

"That's not the way we do things," Sarah Jane agreed.

"You'll have a hard time explaining to your neighbors why your kid ate their dog," Jack quipped. He knew they did things differently in Ealing but this was taking it a bit far even for Miss I-can-save-the-world-without-guns Smith.

"Just give it back to its parents."

"How are we supposed to do that exactly?" Gwen asked. "Nostrovites aren't really the--"

"Actually," Ianto interrupted from his perch at the main level. "She looks like she could help us out with that."

He angled the screen so the others could see the CCTV monitor and the figure currently pacing the length of the Tourist's Information Center that served as a front for the Hub. Black lips pulled back over needle-sharp teeth in a predatory snarl as the female Nostrovite hissed at the door that led underground. Even on the small screen, it was enough to make Gwen cringe and Maria reach for Sarah Jane's hand.

"She's definitely not here to deliver the pizza," Jack announced. "Ianto, go and give the lady back her baby."


Right.

This was definitely going on the list of things that were not in his job description.

"Just stay back." Ianto made a shooing motion with his hand, one really more suited for scooting the cat out of your chair than intimidating a carnivorous metamorph. "Stay over there, and I'll give you this." He held the egg out in front of him.

The Nostrovite bared her teeth again but didn't come any closer.

Ianto rolled the egg across the floor in her direction. Belatedly he hoped she wouldn't take offense at her offspring being tossed about like a common football.

She snatched the egg from the floor with frightening speed and disappeared through the door without so much as a backwards glance.

"You're very welcome."

Ianto cut his eyes towards the CCTV camera. He really shouldn't have tried that whole shooing thing.


After the day they'd had, Sarah Jane decided to heed the Tourist's Information Center's advice.

"Why don't we hold up for the weekend in a nice hotel on the bay, order lots of room service?" She circled her arms round Maria's neck, let her fingertips dance across the length of it to slide into lovely dark curls. "How does that sound?"

Maria's answer was swallowed as Sarah Jane's mouth pressed against hers—lips parting with encouragement from the barest nip of teeth, Maria swayed into her, hands stealing around Sarah Jane's hips to pull her closer. She hadn't realized how much she could miss standing flush against the other woman in just the span of a day until they were separated by a rapidly expanding mound of alien parasite.

Later she finally managed to murmur, "Lovely."


Sarah Jane turned and mouthed a "thank you" towards the CCTV camera before following Maria out into the persistent fog that had settled over Cardiff.


"Aww, they're lovely," Gwen sighed, peering over Jack's shoulder at the screen—the same shoulder she proceeded to soundly smack. "And you, Jack Harkness, you're disgusting."

He turned on the dimples and puppy-dog eyes, but Gwen wasn't buying it. "You had better erase that. Go on."

Jack hit a few buttons, none of which were marked "delete"—"Happy?"

"And if I ever find out which one of you put that video of me and poor Carys that time in the cell online, I'll . . ."