My Brother Dean

It was one of those quiet nights where everyone but Dean was asleep. He had these occasional bouts of insomnia, his mind too active to turn off for the night. Their dad was exhausted from their last hunt, a hunt that had ended successfully with no one harmed. It was Dean's favorite kind of ending. Sammy had finished his homework and had gone to bed immediately thereafter.

Sam's backpack, binder, and homework were strewn all over the kitchen table and Dean couldn't help but smile. His little brother was a whirlwind to be reckoned with. Even when Sam did the research for one of their hunts, things wound up looking pretty much the same.

He decided to help Sam be ready in the morning and neatened things up. After all, he was up and needed to expend his pent up energy. He began shuffling the books, papers, and the various writing utensils into piles to put into Sam's backpack. As he gathered the papers, he glanced at the title of one of Sam's reports. Who Do I Admire? The first sentence caught Dean's eye immediately.

"The person I most admire is my big brother Dean."

Caught by surprise, he couldn't contain his curiosity. He sat down at the table and started reading the rest.

"Our mom died when I was a baby and I don't remember her. I wish I had known her, but Dean has been there for me and for our dad. He's always taken care of us and never made me feel like I was a pain, even though I know I have been. He makes sure we eat, helps me with my homework, is always there when I have a nightmare, and doesn't leave until I fall asleep. Dean tells me about our mom, about how great she was and that she loved me. It makes me feel like she's still with us. He says she told him that big brothers protected their little brothers, and that as long as he was around, he would always protect me. Our dad loves us, but he works really hard to make sure that we have what we need so Dean tells me it's up to us to make sure that everything else is taken care of and Dean really does.

"He taught me how to tie my shoelaces, to ride a bike, and he walks me to school and back every day. I can tell him anything and he'll listen, give me advice, and most of all, he makes sure that I never feel alone. The only time that Dean got really mad at me was when I wandered off exploring with my friends without telling him. He wasn't so much mad as scared. He says it's because we lost our mom that he wants to protect me, and when I'm with him, I'm never afraid. The only time I was ever scared was when Dean got really sick, so sick, Dad had to take him to the hospital. I have never been so scared in my whole life. I don't know what I would do without Dean.

"Sometimes I feel bad that I'm too young to really help as much as I want to, but Dean never complains and says that all I need to worry about is being a kid, doing my homework, and to let him worry about the rest. Sometimes he'll let me help him cook dinner and he really is patient about teaching me things. I love it when he lets me help.

"I admire Dean because, when I talk to my friends and they tell me about their older brothers, they tell me that their brothers never pay attention to them, let alone play with them. Dean always takes the time to play with me. Sometimes I feel bad because when my friends tell me that their brothers are chasing girls and just hanging out with their friends, Dean is stuck taking care of me. Like I said, he doesn't complain, but if I could give Dean anything, it would be time away from Dad and me so that he could have fun too. He deserves it.

"Anyway, I'm glad I have my brother Dean. He shows me what a real hero does. It's someone who puts their family first and makes sure that they are safe. Dean makes me feel safe and I know that I'm the luckiest person in the world to have him. I don't tell him as much as I should, but I hope he knows."

Dean finished reading the paper and felt himself choke up from the honest and unexpected tribute his little brother had made to him. He hadn't realized that Sam had even noticed, not that he did it for the credit. It was nice to hear that Sam appreciated him. He knew that life wasn't easy for any of them and was glad that he could make Sam feel safe and protected. He was also relieved that Sam knew enough not to reveal the real truth behind their lives. Dean guessed that Sam was growing up. At 11, he knew way too much about evil and had lost so much. If Dean could give Sam anything, it would be a normal childhood where he could just be a kid all the time and not have to watch his father and big brother fight demons and other evil. Still, he was happy to know that he was able to give him a taste of normal, even if only for a little while. Dean loved his little brother and sometimes, he could feel their mom there with them, happy that he was raising Sam the way that she would have wanted.

He heard some rustling in their bedroom and quickly shoved the report back into the binder so that Sam wouldn't know he had snooped.

Sure enough, Sam emerged from the bedroom, rubbing his eyes sleepily.

"Hey, what you doing up, little brother? School's tomorrow," Dean asked softly.

"You can't sleep, Dean?" Sam asked innocently.

"Nah, just going to clean things up and I'll be in there in a minute."

"Do you want to talk a little?" Sam said, hopeful that he could stay up with his big brother.

"Nope, you need your beauty sleep, kiddo, so hop back into bed. You'll be out in no time."

"Dean?"

"Yeh, Sammy?"

Sam looked at Dean with eyes an expression of innocent admiration that Dean wished he could capture indefinitely.

"Nothing," Sam said finally and toddled off to bed.

Dean didn't hear the door close, which was Sam's way of telling him that he would be waiting for him. Dean finished putting things away into Sam's backpack, and turned off the kitchen lights.

He checked on Sam and like he had predicted, he was already out like a light. He turned off Sam's bed table lamp and climbed into own his bed. He lay there for a minute, thinking about Sam. He wished things could have been different.

He would give everything he could to give Sam a better life. In Dean's view, it would be worth it.

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Thanks to Tiffany for beta-ing this story. It's always appreciated.