I was in love.

Was, being the key word there.

He was nice, funny, beautiful…perfect.

I lost my virginity to him when I was 19.

I got pregnant and he dropped me.

I had Renesmee, my or should I say our (?) daughter.

Dating with a child…let me say this now: It is not easy.

I would go on one or two dates, tell them about my past relationships, tell them about Renesmee, and bam! They're gone.

I wouldn't hold it against anyone, I guess…

Not every 20 year old wants a girlfriend with a kid.

I was 21 when I met the love of my life.

I was at my first bar with my best friend.

Notice the non pluralized version of friend? Yeah only one friend.

Anyways, Renesmee was with my mom and my best friend took me to my first bar.

We were leaning against the bar, ordering drinks right and left from the hottest bartender ever, when the hottest guy ever comes out of nowhere.

He leaned over the bar and asked for an All American.

I watched him down his drink and then ask for another.

I swear I was just going to admire him but my friend pushed me over to him and I bumped into him.

"Sorry," I said taking a huge step back.

"My fault there misses," He said in the most adorable southern drawl.

I smiled and was about to turn away when he asked, "Are you from around here?"

I nodded and said, "I live not too far from here, actually. How about you, your accent would say you're from down South."

"Well I guess it gave me away then, I'm from Texas but I just moved up here. I have an apartment, just a few blocks from here. The only two places I know where are: here and my apartment," He said laughing.

I laughed with him and said, "I could show you around sometime."

"Really?" He asked.

"Sure, why not?" I asked.

"Can I have your number?" He asked.

I blushed and said, "S-sure."

I asked the nameless bartender for a pen and quickly wrote it down on a napkin.

"Thanks," He said.

We made eye contact directly and I almost died.

He was gorgeous, is gorgeous, whatever?

He was/is beautiful and it felt like his eyes were penetrating my soul.

I blushed more and continued to stare into his beautiful eyes.

But of course Alice comes out of nowhere and says, in a soft whisper so the guy-I-don't-even-knows-name doesn't hear, "Renesmee is awake and wants you."

I nodded and said, "It was nice to meet you, I have to get home though."

"Okay, nice talkin' to you darlin'," He said.

I smiled, blushed, and said, "Call me anytime."

He smiled and said, "Which reminds me… What's your name there pretty gal?"

"Bella," I said blushing.

"Pleasure making your acquaintance, Miss Bella, my name is Jasper," He said.

I'm sure my smile was huge by then and I was going to keep the conversation going but Alice cleared her throat and I had to say, "Well I have to get going, it really was nice meeting you Jasper, call me anytime you want a tour."

"Nice meeting you too, good night Miss Bella," He said.

Alice drove me home and a few weeks later Jasper called me.

I didn't answer. Alice told not to even though I was on the edge of my seat wanting to.

He called the next day and Alice gave me the 'okay' to answer it.

She said something about not sounding too desperate.

Whatever that means….

Anyways I answered and he said, "Bella?"

"Oh, hey Jasper," I said, sounding surprised.

"I'm on my lunch break right now so I don't have much time, I was wondering if you would want to maybe um give me the uh tour this um weekend?" He asked.

I bit my lip to keep the squeal of excitement in. I composed myself and said, "Sure, Saturday around noon okay with you?"

"Sure, sure, where should I meet you?" He asked.

"Oh, shoot, do you know where the park is? It's right next to the high school," I said.

"Oh, yeah, I've driven past that a few times," He said.

"Great, can we meet there?" I asked.

"Sure, sure," He said.

We hung up after saying good bye and then I told Alice.

We celebrated and then when Saturday came I showed him the small city and afterwards he gave me his number!

I was ecstatic!

But I didn't show that, I mean how uncool, right?

We parted and a few days later we were going on another, well technically it was our first, date.

We went to a cozy restaurant he found while we were exploring.

I ate light and so did he.

I was starved, but I didn't want to look like a pig.

Anyways a few months later we were officially dating.

A few months after that we said, "I love you."

A few months after that, I moved in with him.

The whole time while I was dating him I was taking care of Renesmee and relentlessly contacting her father.

I remember the conversation we had had about Renesmee, Jasper and I.

I had sat him down at the park where we met and said, "This is, what? Our fourth or fifth date, right?"

He nodded and I said, "So, I can be totally open about something, and you won't freak out, right?"

"'Course I won't darlin'," He said.

"Well remember when we were talking about my past relationships?" I asked.

He nodded slowly and I said, "Well, my first one, you remember him?"

He nodded slowly, again, with his teeth gritted.

He didn't appreciate the guy taking advantage of me and then dropping me.

I kind of left out the whole, I-got-pregnant-and-he-freaked, part.

Anyways I said, "Well, the reason he left was be-because I got pregnant."

He had been holding my hands but he let them go. He sat back and his face was scrunched up in…confusion? Anger? Uncertainty?

I don't know.

I was preparing myself for the rejection that so often came after this kind of discovery.

But he didn't move…

Which I didn't know if that was good or bad.

I remember thinking he was like paralyzed somehow, but he recovered and said, "What a jerk that man must have been."

I blinked and looked up at him, we were sitting but he was still taller than me.

"Really?" I asked.

"Hm? Really what?" He asked, curiously.

"You're not going to run away?" I asked.

"Why would I?" He asked, cocking his head to the side.

"I just told you I have a child at my home right now, and you're not freaking out, or running away," I said.

"Would you like me to?" He asked with his beautiful grin in place.

I laughed and threw my arms around him.

I kissed him and then, somehow, we whispered, "I love you," at the same moment.

It was romantic as hell.

He met Renesmee a few days later and they loved each other.

A few months later we moved in with each other.

My apartment was smaller so I moved in with him.

Renesmee loved hanging out with Jasper and I remember coming into the room hearing her asking him if he was her daddy.

Jasper had whispered, "I would love to be your daddy. Would that be okay?"

"Sure it would, you're nice. Mommy told me, well mommy told me not to tell you," She whispered back.

She was four when she told him.

"What, I can keep a secret," He whispered.

"Mommy told me that you were like her Romeo," She whispered through her giggles.

So I read Romeo and Juliet to my child.

So what if she understood it more than I did?

"She did, did she?" He whispered.

I was still hiding behind the wall.

She nodded and then Jasper said loud enough I heard him, "Bella, you can come in here; I know your hiding behind the wall."

I giggled and walked into the living room.

"What are you doing, munchkin? Telling mommy's secrets?" I asked tickling her.

"No! Right, Japer?" She asked.

She wasn't so great with her s's…

The only S word she was good at saying was, "Sure," because Jasper used it so much.

Sure…sure…sure…

I turned to him and he said, "Well, Miss Juliet how was work last night?"

I giggled and said, "Just fine, and how was work for you, Romeo?"

"Fantastic, how was work for you Miss Nessie?" He asked.

It was a really cute nick name…

"Work? I don't go to work, I'm only four!" She screeched.

"Are you sure? That's old enough to get a job, isn't it?" He asked.

"No! That's againt the Child Labor Law," She giggled.

I remember how I had stared wide eyed at her and asked, "How do you know what those are?!"

"Aunty Alice told me 'bout them," She said.

I giggled and said, "Well, thank you, Aunty Alice."

Well all laughed and a few weeks later…life fell apart.

Jasper, Renesmee, and I were great!

Bills were easy to pay, especially with a boyfriend that works for a military weapon constructor. He made the weapons so he got paid a decent amount to make them right.

I, on the other hand, worked at the library as a part time librarian.

I still called, emailed, whatever contact information I had of his I used, to contact him.

I wanted him to be a part of her life.

But, after the last email I sent, that I got no reply to still a month later, I gave up.

I decided that Jasper, if he wanted, could be her Dad, but she would not see that horrible man, ever again.

I remember that I was folding laundry, Jasper was making dinner, and Renesmee was watching TV.

The phone rang which I heard Jasper pick up.

A few seconds later I heard Jasper holler down the hallway, "Bella it's for you!"

I grabbed Renesmee and walked into the kitchen with her on my hip.

"Who is it, hun?" I asked.

"Not sure, he just asked for you," He said.

"Okay, thank you," I said.

I picked up the phone and said, "Bella Swan speaking."

"Bella? Is it really you?" He asked.

"Wh-what? Who is this?" I asked.

"It's Edward," He said.

"What do you want?" I asked, recovering from my surprise.

"I want to see Renesmee," He said, quietly.

"No," I said.

"You can't keep her from me," He said, his voice hardening.

"Watch me, it's my child and she doesn't want to see you. If she knew the things you had done, she would resent you, and you know it," I said.

"I'll take you to court," He said.

"What? You'll take me to court to see the child you didn't even want all those years ago?" I asked.

"Yes, I realized my mistakes, I want to be a part of her life," He said.

"Do you even know how old she is? What about her eye color, do you know that, Edward?" I asked.

"Of course I do, she is 5 next month, and has green eyes," He said.

"It doesn't matter, you're not seeing her," I said with gritted teeth.

"You can't do this," He said.

"Yes I can, watch me," I said, hanging up.

Renesmee was still watching, fascinated, with Jasper's cooking.

Jasper was staring at me.

I let out a strangled sob and started to cry.

Renesmee turned to me and I hugged her to me.

"Are you okay, Mommy?" She asked.

I nodded, continued to cry, and continued to hug her to me.

I felt Jasper slowly slip her out of my arms and I fell to the ground.

He was pushing his way into my life again, and I didn't want him to.

I hugged my knees and when I felt Jasper wrapping me back in his arms I cried harder.

I didn't want my life to be bad again.

"I love you," I said.

"I love you too," He said.

***

All I need is to start another story…but I did!

Review…or not. Check out my other stories…

And this is just the prologue…the chapters will be longer!