Say Something! by ArthurGirl16

Chapter One: Cue Title!


Arthur walked onto the empty title card set and leaned against the black-and-white-striped circle underneath the hanging sign with the title of the episode spelled out in yellow. "Sometimes," he began knowingly, "you just don't know what to say."

Muffy strutted onto the set, sashaying from side to side. She had a new hairstyle that looked like a cross between a full-out afro and a beehive. Arthur's mouth dropped open as Muffy struck a pose and spun around just as she passed Arthur, patting her head lovingly. "Don't you just love my hair, Arthur?" she asked confidently. "Everyone keeps saying I look just like Bitty Smears!"

She batted her eyelashes at him. "Don't I?"

Arthur pulled hard on the collar of his shirt, releasing a puff of steam. He wouldn't look at Muffy. "Uh..." he mumbled, trailing off and staring at his shoes. "It's... er..."

"Arthur, guess what?!" greeted Buster happily, running into the scene.

Arthur wiped a drop of sweat off of his forehead, temporarily relieved as Buster grabbed Arthur's shoulder excitedly. "My mother got an interview with Wilbur Rabbit and she says we can come along and each ask him a question to get printed in the newspaper!" he told Arthur in a rush, cheering.

"No way!" Arthur gasped, his eyes going wide just as Wilbur Rabbit (as Bionic Bunny, of course) strode into frame.

"Hey!" cried Muffy. She was standing on a crate and had one arm over her head and the other straight out in what she considered a fashionable pose. She wobbled dangerously. "Arthur?!"

"Hello boys," Bionic Bunny announced importantly, placing his hands on his hips and puffing his chest out so the B on his costume stretched all the way across. "What would you like to ask me, Arthur?"

Arthur's mouth hung open as he stared at his favorite superhero. "Uh—um..." he stuttered nervously, trying to think.

"Hey Arthur!" grumbled a voice to his left, and Arthur wiped a bead of sweat off of his forehead in relief, thankful for the momentary distraction. Binky was stomping in his direction, followed by the rest of the Tough Customers.

"Yes, Binky?" said Arthur nicely, trying to ignore Buster, who was pulling on his arm, and Muffy, who was still wobbling and complaining.

Binky folded his arms cross his broad chest and gave Arthur a menacing look; Arthur's smile faded instantly. Rattles and Slink backed Binky up with hard glares in Arthur's direction and growls. "Give us your lunch money, Goofus!" When Arthur didn't move, Binky stomped his foot. "Now!"

Arthur was still frozen, glancing from Binky to Rattles to Slink and back again. "But-but—"

"Arthur!" whined Buster loudly, tugging hard on Arthur's arm again. "Bionic Bun—whoa!" Buster lost his grip and went flying backwards, knocking Muffy off of her feet and sending her wig into the rafters. "That was a wig?" Buster murmured from his new spot, tangled with the camera wires criss-crossing the floor, "I was sure that was an alien—hey-ouch!"

"That hairpiece was forty-five dollars!" screeched Muffy, pulling out a cellphone with one hand and pointing at the wig hanging from the ceiling with the other. She frowned angrily at Buster, who was turning blue beneath her; she was sitting right on his chest, pressing all the air out of his lungs. "I'm suing you, Buster Baxter!" she spat.

"I'll save your wig!" cried Bionic Bunny, punching his first high into the air. "Up, up, and away!" he shouted, staying completely stationary as Muffy and Buster watched with interest.

Binky rolled his eyes at the lot of them and turned back to a sweating Arthur. "Molly's lunch accidentally got poured all over some Loser, so we have to buy her another one—now!" he added loudly, as all three of the larger boys stepped back to make way for the tallest Tough Customer of them all: Molly. Her extra-long rabbit ears even towered over Binky!

Arthur gulped, and two spots of pink appeared on his cheeks. He stared at the ground as Molly approached.

Molly took the toothpick she'd been chewing on out of her mouth and pointed it at Arthur like a sword. "Gimme all your lunch money," she ordered loudly, taking a step closer to Arthur and pointing the toothpick harder at him with every word, "or you're entering a world of pain."

Then she winked at Arthur surreptitiously, glanced back at the Touch Customers and gave them a thumbs up.

The older boys nodded approvingly as Bionic Bunny made a few more feeble attempts at flying. "Up, up, and—"

"You can't fly," scoffed Muffy, covering the mouthpiece on her cell with her palm and rolling her eyes. "You're just an actor!"

A purple Buster faintly nodded beneath her as Wilbur Rabbit rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Oh yeah..."

Muffy removed her hand and resumed her conversation on her cell phone. "I demand restitution for this terrible tragedy he's caused! That's right, it's B-U-S-T-E-R B-A-X—"

Molly turned back to Arthur. He wouldn't look Molly in the bangs, and his cheeks were darkening from pink to red. "Um..."

"Well?" growled Molly, sticking out her hand impatiently.

"Arthur!" whimpered Buster and Muffy.

Arthur's knees buckled. "Uh..."

"Anyone got a ladder?" asked Wilbur Rabbit, scratching his head.


Thank you for reading so far! Next up is Chapter Two: Crushed... Again?