Ogrelords
It was another day where sorcerers and swordsmen joined forces to fight other sorcerers and swordsmen. The Radiant and the Dire entered another war that would not stop until either Ancient was demolished. On the Dire stood a Pudge, Axe, Slark, Night Stalker, and a Shadow Demon. None of them bought a courier as Pudge demanded mid in the trademark call of "mid or feed". Axe and Night Stalker went top lane, with Night Stalker possessing only starting with boots and tangos. Axe bought other items. Shadow Demon and Slark went to the bottom buying items for the time being.
On the Radiant was a Sniper, Anti-Mage, Drow Ranger, and a Nature's Prophet The last one to join the fray was Aggron Stonebreaker, the blue, two-headed Ogre Magi. Drow went mid and forced Anti-Mage to go bottom. Nature's Prophet waited for the horn to sound before teleporting to the Radiant cliff to jungle. The ogre mustered up just enough intelligence to buy a courier and other essential items before debating where to go.
"Let's go north!" "No, south!" "North!" "South!" the ogre bickered to himself until his left head had a lucky brainwave,
"Fine, let's NOT go south!" "Yeah! We-uh, huh?" Now with a solution, the Ogre Magi forced himself to go top with the Sniper. Both stood by their tier-three tower waiting for the horn to sound as they chatted.
"Hi there, Sniper! We're gonna win this one aren't we?" "…When can I hit something?"
The sniper said only gibberish in a different language before adjusting his eyepiece with his stubby index finger. He seemed quite confident in his ability to carry his game by starting off with just a wraith band. Yet somehow he did not realize he would be competing for that pride with three other carries. None the less, the horn sounded as the creeps emerged from their barracks to charge forward in a suicidal march. This caught the short attention span of the left head.
"Oh, look at those little things!" I think they're creeps…" The Ogre Magi thought to himself, looking at them run with no regrets towards the enemy tier one tower. Soon both sides of creeps clashed as a Sniper/Ogre Magi lane was pitted against a Night Stalker/Axe lane. All of them auto attacked the creeps, getting last hits only out of sheer luck with one accidental deny by the Night Stalker. All of them except for Ogre Magi who stared off in the distance, barely seeing something behind the thick forest. Whether it was his own thick skulls deceiving him or something else, curiosity got the better of him as Sniper took potshots at the melee lane.
"Oooh, what's over there?" "Let's find out! Hee hee hee!" In vain the ogre tried to squeeze through the trees, but was too fat and failed to do so.
"Hey wait a minute!" the Ogre's right head said with a flash of lucky inspiration, "What if we got us a quelling blade?" "That's a good idea!" "'Cause it was mine! Mmhmm!" Suddenly the Sniper yelled at the Ogre Magi, catching his attention to let him know about the severely wounded Night Stalker limping away from the creep wave. Almost out of instinct, the Ogre Magi grabbed his fiery club and burned the Night Stalker with a Fireblast spell, knocking him down dead to the ground in a fiery glamour. Suddenly, a bright light shone down and blessed the ogre with a bounty of four-hundred gold and arcane knowledge of burning things indiscriminately.
"Ha ha! First blood!" both heads exclaimed in joy to be heard across the whole map, with the right head then stating, "That's pure skill, ha ha!" in a dumb, brutish tone of voice. Which was his type of voice all the time. Now with some extra cash in his pockets, he went to the side shop and bought himself a nice pair of boots and a quelling blade. The two-headed ogre went back to the left side of the tree line where stood dozens of them. One by one the clumsy ogre managed to carve out a path out of the trees before disappearing off the map into parts unknown.
