Disturbing Tales
Chapter 1: Neal saves the day!
"Alas!" yelled Bilbo Baggins. " I have discovered the most thrilling exciting useful thing ever!"
"What this time?" Asked Alanna rolling her eyes. This Bilbo Baggins guy moved in the castle two months ago. He was very senile.
"This!" Said Bilbo holding up a candle. "It shall permit me to light a fire so I can read Buffy the Vampire Slayer even when it's dark! Hurray! And Since I discovered it I'll name it Bilbo!" he stroked the candle lovingly.
"You Quack!" screeched Alanna " That's a candle! AND IT WAS INVENTED A LONG TIME AGO BY SOME OLD SPANISH DEAD GUY NAMED DOMINO!"
"OH NO!" Yelled Bilbo sadly and loudly and annoyingly " I am a failure as a fireman! I let everyone down by eating an anorexic meatloaf!" Bilbo started crying, took of his clothes and ran around in naked circles.
"SCREECH!" screeched Alanna in horror "NAKAGE! GEORGE SAVE ME!"
Owen ran into the room wearing a tight red costume and said "I am Spiderman and I shall save- HOLY CRAP!" He saw Bilbo running around naked. Owen was so terrified he pulled off his clothes and ran out the door.
King Jon walked into the room with a dreamy look on his face "I just saw Owen Naked! He's soooooo sexy Alanna! I'M GOING TO ASK HIM OUT! AND DON'T YOU DARE TRY TO STEAL HIM FROM ME ALANNA! YOU'RE ALWAYS TRYING TO STEAL MY BOYFRIENDS!" Jon started to cry.
Neal walked into the room calmly and whacked Jon in the head. Jon stopped crying and started to do yoga.
"Uh oh" said Neal calmly "I busted something in Jon's small sized brain. Oh well."
Neal looked calmly at Bilbo Calmly and calmly said 'Bilbo. Please stop you're disturbing the neighbors." Calmly Neal pointed out the palace window were neighbors were staring at Bilbo disturbed.
Neal the kicked Bilbo into the dungeons were he could be as naked as he want's and nobody would care because everybody in the dungeon loved naked old hairy short guy's.
"Wow!" said Alanna "You saved the day!" She hugged Neal tightly. Neal calmly pushed her off and ran to do calm stuff calmly.
Alanna decided that she loved Neal. When somebody saves you from seeing a naked old hairy short guy you tend to fall in love with him.
"Yay Neal!" yelled Alanna. She then went to his room to steal Neals socks and put them under her pillow as an act of lovingly love.
